Donatello walked directly in front of his older brothers' view of the TV.
"So, Leo, do you want a rematch?"
The blue-masked turtle sat up at once. "Right now?"
Donatello nodded, and he leaped to his feet.
"You're on," Leo agreed, exchanging a wink with Raph.
When they reached the dojo, Donatello turned back to Leonardo before he took his position.
"Hey, Leo, about before..." he faltered.
"Do you want to talk, or do you want to fight, Don? C'mon, we're burning daylight," Leonardo teased.
The purple-masked turtle simply shut his mouth, and joined his brother on the mat. Every sense automatically heightened when he took a deep breath. There was still a nagging fear of pushing Leo too far, but Mike's lecture (and the fact that he was standing by watching) made it impossible to back down.
Leo has seen it too. If I don't give him my best, it will probably tick him off more.
That was why he gazed stoically at his older brother, straining to hide every emotion and the nerves. As typical, Leonardo didn't make any sudden moves. It never fit either of their styles. He seemed to be waiting on him now, as much as Donnie was waiting on him.
The blue-masked turtle had his own favorite lead-offs; Donnie couldn't predict exactly what his first move would be, but he had a pretty good idea of where he would end up.
He sensed Leonardo's lunge, a split second before a roundhouse kick left the ground. Donatello had just enough time to evade the blow, but failed to anticipate the spinning heel back kick which followed to his plastron. Hitting the mat made the younger turtle groan, more from the extra point it garnered his brother than actual pain.
Still, it wasn't over yet, so he regained his feet and adopted a wider stance.
"Can you keep up with me, Don?" Leo's taunt was nothing unusual or hurtful, but the desire to prove he was trying surged.
Donnie went against his natural instincts, crossing the respectful boundary he kept in sparring much sooner than he wanted to. Closer range put him at risk for a different type of attack, yet allowed less space for things like Leo's former combination.
He expected the blue-masked turtle to be aggressive when he essentially opened himself up for it. Don was mentally ready to block and deflect jabs, while preparing his own offense. The purple-masked turtle was the type who didn't mind waiting out an opponent, but it didn't make his brother easier to predict.
A double-punch along with a knee thrust sent Don into a spin to evade three nearly simultaneous attacks. He didn't see the elbow coming until it was an inch from his face, and barely managed to brace for impact. Even the softened force of his brother's strike caused him to shake his head in order to clear it.
Despite the point, the last second shift in his weight helped Donnie avoid going down that time, and earned a nod from Leonardo.
"Not bad, bro. Are we going to five points? Or do you need a minute?"
Don rolled his shoulders and fell into another ready stance. "Nah. I'm all right."
"Good. Make this a little exciting for me."
The older turtle was quicker to move into his personal space this time. Leo's tactic appeared to have shifted yet again, making it even harder to anticipate what he would do. Don had no choice but to give up analyzing where fists might fall, and focused on searching for an opening. After all, he knew one of the most vulnerable moments for an attacker could come while they were actually on the offensive.
That was why he backed up from Leonardo's next drive, like he was attempting to evade him. Only when his brother pursued this time, he sprang toward him. Don leveraged the right support from both legs to collide with an explosive force that sent the blue-masked turtle flying into the wall.
Leonardo was clearly startled by the shift, but not technically downed. "You do wanna make it interesting."
"Oi, Fearless!" Raphael called. "Would you guys finish this already? We're missing the movie."
Leonardo chuckled. "You want this to end, Raph? I'll finish it!"
"Kick his shell, Donnie!" Mike retorted.
Donatello was distracted by his little brother's outburst, and wasn't ready for Leonardo's effortless launch. He saved himself with a dive which was nowhere near as graceful, yet successfully evaded being pinned. He only had a chance to jump to his feet once more, before another kick almost collided with his ribcage.
He accidentally backpedaled into the wall, and felt the wind of his brother's approach instantly. Donatello found himself neatly hemmed into a corner, and expected it was probably Leo's goal all along. There was no time to strategize; he had to act fast.
Immediately after blocking a punch, he used his other arm to throw a fake blow near his brother's head, without possessing full intent. The moment Leonardo's attention was drawn, he lashed out with his other hand. The glancing strike to his chin was nothing but another distraction. Donnie's real effort went into hooking the blue-masked turtle's foot.
The purple-masked honed in on his Achilles tendon, focusing specifically on the pressure point to level him. It was a sensitive spot which they rarely employed, but Don knew more about the nerve endings than any of his brothers from medical studies.
"You finished it all right, Leo!" Raphael laughed when their older brother went down.
What small amount of satisfaction Don was able to gather because Leo hadn't "finished" him was completely offset by the way the older turtle buried his face against the mat with a pained groan.
Don swore, dropping to the mat beside him. "Are you okay? I'm sorry-"
Leonardo swatted his hand away with sudden fierceness. "Don't touch me!"
His brother rolled over and scooted up against the wall, gripping his heel with a grimace.
Donatello knew how much the attack could hurt if it wasn't performed correctly. He'd barely had time to think in the heat of the moment, but was now afraid he had honestly injured him.
"I understand you're mad, and I don't blame you," Don said carefully. "But you need to let me see it, and don't try moving again."
"I'll get Sensei," Mike squeaked.
The blue-masked turtle sent a scowl across the room before hopping to his feet, only slightly favoring his right one. "I'm not hurt."
Don took the chance of approaching him. "It could be worse than you think-"
"What is your problem, Donnie? Are you only scewing with me?" Leonardo puncuating the last word with a hard shove that sent Donatello a quarter of the way across the room.
Mike crossed the mat, a low growl pulsating in his throat. "Leo..."
"Step off, Mike. I didn't do anything!" Leo shot back, still glaring at Donatello. "What's the game here? Please explain it to me!"
"I didn't mean-It's not a game-"
Leonardo's eye contact could have burned right through him. "Can you honestly tell me you haven't been holding out on us?"
"No," he admitted. "I can't."
Dark eyes narrowed even further when Leo strode a couple steps toward him, but he didn't get far. The red-masked turtle jumped in front of him at once.
"Okay, Leo. Now ya need to chill out."
"Of course you're against me too. You thought it was funny," the older turtle muttered. "He does something like that, and you're on Don's side?"
"I ain't against anybody, and I laughed before I thought you got hurt," Raphael said flatly. "I'm only stopping your shell from doing something you'll regret."
"I'm not attacking anyone! I want to get the truth out of him, once and for-"
Their Sensei chose that moment to enter the room. "What is going on in here?"
For a few seconds, no one spoke.
The purple-masked turtle knew it was ultimately his responsibility, so he finally looked up from the floor he'd fixed on. "It was my fault. Leo and I were sparring-"
"He didn't hurt him on purpose!" Michelangelo inserted. "It was just an accident."
"Who is hurt?" Splinter gazed between the pair of turtles.
Don glanced back at his oldest brother, whose anger was now silently concealed.
"No one," Leo said, emotionless.
"He was," Donnie declared. "You need to check his heel to be sure, because he doesn't want me-"
"I'm not hurt," Leo reinforced. "He got a pressure point. It was more painful than I expected, but there was nothing else to it. Mike's right - it was an accident."
Splinter's sharp eyes surveyed the blue-masked turtle for a moment. "There is no pain when you are standing or walking?"
"Only a little now."
"Your swelling appears minimal. I would still like you to elevate and ice it. Raphael, Michelangelo, assist him. I will take a closer look in a couple minutes. You will accept treatment if it is required."
Leonardo bowed his head. "Hai, Sensei."
The oldest turtle walked out of the room without looking back, and was immediately pursued by Raph and Mike.
Don expected the rat to have questions, but Splinter didn't say anything right away.
"I really didn't mean to hurt him," he volunteered. "I reacted, and although I think he's okay, I know I could have done worse. I'm sorry, Sensei."
"My son, Leonardo confessed a growing frustration to me earlier. Do you know where it comes from?"
He could feel heat building behind his cheeks. "Partially. Yeah."
"He mentioned in the past that you appear to be giving in easily. Leonardo said the same about today. Will you confirm or deny this?"
"I haven't been trying hard, Sensei."
"I see. Why is that exactly?"
Don shifted awkwardly, unwillingly to speak the whole truth. Maybe he could get away with telling part of it. "I feel like I get a better reception from the others when I let them win."
Splinter shook his head. "I do not understand the four of you sometimes. You are all each other has. These disagreements and misunderstandings are so minor. If you would only address them, they could be solved. Avoiding things by surrendering or running repairs nothing."
"You're right, Master," Donatello mumbled, and didn't elaborate any further.
"There is nothing else you need to tell me?"
"No, Sensei. I won't do it anymore, I promise."
Splinter sighed heavily. "Soon, all of you will be adults. It seems this was simpler when you were only youth, constantly getting under my feet. Are you able to make up with your brother?"
"I will, Master Splinter."
"You are certain no more details need shared?"
"No, Sensei. We'll be fine."
When Donatello came back out, Mike was waiting in the hallway. The orange-masked turtle nodded towards the stairs, and Don followed him up to their bedroom.
"How did that go?" Mike asked.
"It was fine."
"You didn't tell him anything."
"What good would it have done? Master Splinter is right. We're almost adults, and we need to get to a place where we're working things out on our own."
"That's not what he said," his brother objected.
"You were listening?"
"You're the one who showed me the vent trick with the lounge, Donnie."
"I don't think Sensei needs to hear about every little issue we have, Mikey. Honestly, I know I'm sensitive and stuck in my own head. Most of the time, it seems like I'm the only one with a problem."
"Don, that's not true, and you know it."
Donatello shrugged. "It feels true. I'll apologize to Leo again later, after he cools off for a little while."
"I don't see why you need to."
"I told Sensei I would deal with this. It'll be over faster if I just eat crow."
"You know what the real problem is, don't you? Leo is so freaking intimidated by you, he can hardly take it."
"Are you out of your mind?'
"You have no idea what it's like having a genius for a brother."
"You're not intimidated by me."
"Sure I am, Donnie, but I don't let it bother me."
"Regardless of why it's gotten harder, I can't help thinking it's my fault, Mike. One way or another, I'll find a way to solve this."
"How would it be if I went to the surface and got myself hit by a car? Do you think that could clear things up?" Mike cracked.
Donatello hated laughing at him. "We do tend to come together better during a crisis. But no, Mikey, I can't recommend it."
"What about a bicyclist? That wouldn't be so bad, would it?"
The question only made him snort harder. "Mike..."
"There's always the flu to fall back on too."
"Because we all know you're such a great faker." Donatello finally allowed a tiny smile for his brother, and rose off the bottom bunk. "I think I'm going to take a walk. I'll be back in a little bit, okay?"
"Leave your cellphone on!" Mike called after him. "And don't take on any terrorists by yourself!"
"You mighta been a little hard on him, Fearless," Raphael told him.
"Raph, what are you saying? He sits back for weeks absolutely wasting our time, and I'm not supposed to be upset? You heard him and Mike laughing down the hall. Don couldn't care less."
"Leo, I'm only thinking...Donnie doesn't like to cause trouble. I don't think he was trying to."
"Are you inside his head, Raph? Do you have a clue what goes through it? Because I don't."
"I know Don is kind of a mystery, Leo, but he ain't malicious."
"That's not how it seemed today. What do you want me to do, track him down? He's the one who's been fronting this whole time."
"You need to give him a chance to explain. It sounded like he was trying to tell you something."
"All he'll do is make excuses for himself. If he wants to come clean, he knows where to find me."
Donnie was gone for a little over and hour, and when he returned to the Den, no one was in sight. He could hear music coming from the dojo, and the strains of Cold Play* confirmed it was his oldest brother.
He ventured back through the hall, stopping outside the room when he saw his oldest brother stretching on his own. He knocked lightly on the partially open door, and received a tolerant look from Leonardo.
"Where's Raph?" he asked, just to find out if his brother was talking to him.
"Bedroom. Where'd you go?"
"Nowhere. I was only walking." Donatello came into the dojo further, still tense. "Leo, I wasn't trying to screw with you. You've got to believe me."
He could feel cold wariness radiating off his brother, but kept going. "If you thought I did it on purpose, why did you tell Sensei it was an accident?"
"Because you've covered for Raph and I multiple times. I owe you," he answered coolly.
Then Leo broke eye contact with a sigh. "I don't understand you lately. It's like you're two different people, and I never know who's gonna show his face. There's the compassionate, kind, brilliant brother I grew up with. And then I get the obsessed, reclusive, manipulative version..."
The crushing sensation in his chest made Don glad his brother trailed off, but there was no way he was finished.
"You've gotta help me out here," Leo said bluntly. "I can't read your mind. So if you don't tell me what's happening, then I have to start making my own assumptions."
Donatello wanted to defend himself, but couldn't figure out how to do it without touching a nerve. In the end, he opted for the simplistic version of the truth he'd told Splinter. "I thought...letting you guys win got me more favor with you. That's all. I wasn't trying to set you up to fall harder."
"Donnie, this has to be the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Why would I want you to waste my time, or yours for that matter? Throwing the matches doesn't make sense. Is that what sparring is for you, only a chance to make someone else happy?
"Don't you get why we're doing this? Our lives are on the line, regularly. The point is to prepare in here, so we don't die out there! As someone who nearly lost his life multiple times last year, I expect you to remember that. When it seems like I'm being hard on you, it's only because I want to make sure you stay alive."
Anger rose, despite Donnie's best effort. Keeping everyone alive was his main motivation too; not that he expected Leo to understand it. "I'm not the only one who's been taken out by a gang though, am I?"*
The statement was too much - he knew it the moment words left his mouth.
"I'm perfectly aware of my failures," the older turtle retorted. "I work to overcome them every day. I suggest you start working on yours."
This wasn't going to end well if Donnie kept talking.
"I said I was sorry, Leo," he quietly relented. "I won't do it again."
"You better not. I have no problem getting your shell banned if that's what it takes to keep you safe. Would you prefer to quit patrolling? Focus on the science side and leave the rest of it behind? Because, once again, I can't read your mind. You have to open your mouth."
"No." Don shook his head emphatically. "That isn't what I want."
"You'd better prove it then. I'd say we could go tonight, but I sort of feel like the day is shot. Can we plan on acting like a team tomorrow?"
"Yeah, I'm up for it. I'll do better, Leo."
There was still a troubling quality to his brother's gaze. "You have to. If you're having an issue, you also need to tell me. Hiding doesn't accomplish anything."
Donatello nodded meekly but inwardly, he was deflated. The chances of that happening now are less than they were before. But as long as I manage to fix myself, nothing else should be an issue.
*When speaking to Leonardo about not being the only one to suffer under a gang, he was referring to events in my fic, The World I Know. And I don't own Cold Play.