A/N: I have no excuses. I said I wouldn't update this. Rawr. Stupid me and my inability to do what I say I will.
Deleted Scenes
"Do you have this month's report?" Byakuya asked in a dignified voice.
OF COURSE, Ukitake scrawled, showing the notepad to the other captain.
He reached into his desk and pulled out a manila envelope with the word CONFIDENTIAL stamped across the front in red. He handed it to Byakuya.
Byakuya opened the flap and slid out pages of notes, paper clipped to a few photographs. His narrow eyes scanned the text.
"So," He clarified, looking up, "the only guy Rukia has been 'alone'" he made airquotes "with this month is Ichigo, and Kiyone was spying on them the entire time."
YES.
"Excellent. Keep up the good work. Here's your payment." He put a box of real world candy on the desk. (where did it come from? I didn't bother to plan it out. I guess up the sleeve of his captain coat.)
YAY!
Byakuya turned to leave. Ukitake tapped him on the shoulder.
"What?"
IS ICHIGO REALLY THAT DANGEROUS? YOU HAVEN'T BEEN THIS WORRIED SINCE KAIEN WAS ALIVE.
"Do you know why Renji is my lieutenant?"
Ukitake shook his head.
"So I can keep an eye on him. I will do anything to protect the honor of Ru- ah, the Kuchiki family name."
OH.
Byakuya frowned. "You know, ever since you lost your voice you've gotten a lot less fun to talk to. Maybe if you drew some pictures to accompany the words? Here, let me demonstrate."
He took the pad of paper and began to sketch out a rabbit.
AN: Well, that was unexpected. I really wasn't planning on updating this at all. But I have had this scene in mind forever and it didn't fit into the storyline at all… but I figured if it belonged in any of my fics, it belonged in the mishmash-trying-too-hard-to-be-funny fic that doesn't take itself seriously. Basically, it belongs here.