You guys have been so awesome, I felt a bit nice so I decided to post this instead of sitting on it. The Drama is coming out full force and you should know the drama that happened between Brenda and Dylan in London soon, if not next chapter it will definitely be the following but I am thinking next. I hope you like it. Its an intense yet more emotional chapter. Enjoy!

Chapter 5 Secrets Revealed

"Brenda…what the hell is going on?" David said as he picked up the empty baggie on the bed. "Dylan does drugs again?" David said worried.

"I can't deal with this…I thought moving away from the bad memories would help but."

"Brenda? Moving away from what?" David knelt next to her.

Brenda threw up her hands and pushed herself to her feet. She wiped her face and walked toward the front door, she opened it and slammed it behind her. She slowly dropped to the porch and started to cry again. She couldn't deal with this by herself anymore. She loved Dylan more than anything more than anyone. She couldn't help him. For once in her life, she was helpless to him. It seemed in the past just being there saved him but now with everything they had went through he was slowly slipping away from her and she realized she may not get him back.

David pushed himself to his feet as he leaned over and checked Dylan once again. He watched as his chest moved in and out slowly. He looked toward the bedroom door and went to find Brenda. He grabbed one of his hooded sweatshirts and found her sitting on the porch crying softly. She looked so child like; he had never seen her this way. David was shocked, he had no idea, they had covered up any sort of issues they were having so well. He saw the love that wasn't the problem but they were different now, both seemed weak, hurt and helpless. David slowly moved next to her. He swung his sweatshirt around her bare shoulders and took a seat beside her. He gently wrapped his arm around her and pulled her closely into his chest.

"How long has this been going on?" he spoke softly.

He felt Brenda tremble, "Six months."

"What was in the bag?" David tried to get any information she would give him without pushing her too much.

"Heroine." She hated even saying it. She had never been a fan of drugs but that one hit a nerve with her and she knew it was something that would haunt her for the rest of her life.

"Dylan." David breathed out; David rested his chin on the top of Brenda's head and remembered Dylan 4 years before. All of the gang was involved and he couldn't fathom dealing with him back then by himself.

"I tried leaving one time, a few months ago. I packed my stuff and left. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I looked at him for ten minutes straight. We didn't even say anything, he begged me not to go, to help him, he told me he needed me and he couldn't and did not want to go on without me… and I walked out. It was the worst few days of my life, there wasn't a time when I didn't think about him." Brenda smiled through her tears remembering better days.

She leaned up and looked at David, "I got back from rehearsals, it was late and the only thing I could think about was my bed. As I walked down the hallway of my apartment building I saw him. He was sitting in front of my door, nose in a book. I froze, paralyzed by the sight of him. I had heard about Toni and Brandon had told me he had taken off. That night as I came closer to him, he must have sensed me because he slowly raised his head from his book and looked at me. There were no words spoken he just gave me that weak smile I remembered. I remember throwing down my bag and script and just walked quickly to him. Maybe I even ran, I don't know…I don't remember even feeling the floor. He looked thinner and tired. He rose to his feet and…" Brenda swallowed and looked down. "he took me into his arms and I don't remember how long we stood there but it may have actually been an hour. I cried…he cried…I knew what he had been through, the drugs and his wife's death. He didn't have to tell me. I was glad to see him and I knew what he came for. He came for me, he whispered in my ear that he missed me and never stopped loving me. His embrace was warm and exactly how I remembered it. It was amazing in the beginning. We had grown up so much, high school didn't matter, Kelly didn't matter, it was just me and him." Brenda blinked as tears rolled down her face. Watching Brenda explain when Dylan first came to her in London actually choked David up a bit. Looking at the pain in her eyes, yet they sparkled a bit as she talked about him.

"Have you ever been so connected with someone that you know what they are thinking just by their eyes. Laying next to him in bed it's like I can feel his breathes before he takes them. Have you ever felt that?"

David shook his head slowly.

"When Brandon told me Dylan was getting married, I cried for three days straight." Brenda laughed lightly. "He had found someone, in which he was willing to settle down with. I know Dylan and he would never do that unless he had connected with someone on another level, someone that he could be with and knew his story like I did. I couldn't be mad or jealous, I didn't come home. And I know if I did we would have been together but as much as I wanted it, I couldn't. God I was strong back then, I'm nothing like that now." Brenda looked out into the courtyard, "I'm weak and after those three days of us being apart it was the same thing. I came home from rehearsal late again, this time he wasn't reading a book. He was sitting outside my front door, hovered over in pain. I didn't run to him this time. I stood next to him and it took him a second to even know I was there. There was no sensing or…" Brenda shook her head remembering. "He looked at me and instead of loss and love; I saw pain and urgency in his eyes." Brenda continued, "After taking him inside he told me he hadn't had anything in 48 hours and that his body was in withdrawl from the heroine. I stood by him for 4 days, I didn't even leave the house, I held him, I watched him kick, and cuss and yell and scream. I saw things I would never want to see again if I had the choice. So after those 4 days when he was past the vomiting and being sick, I told him I loved him and I would always love him and for him to choose, me or heroine. I thought he chose me." Brenda broke down again and sobbed into David's chest. "For once I thought he chose me."

David took a deep breath and wiped the tears that had made it out of his eyes. He shook his head and looked down. What was he going to say? She had been through hell with him and he didn't know the right words.

"Bren? Did he start because of Toni? Did he not deal with it enough? I mean did he move on with you to quickly?" David felt bad asking.

Brenda understood, "No…we talked about Toni and he grieved for her. He told me about her and I felt like I knew her. Well as much as he did in the short time they knew each other. He was ok for a long time. Until…" Brenda stopped.

"What happened?" David said interested.

Brenda shook her head, "Nobody knows but us and I am not ready to share it yet. But neither one of us wanted to deal with it."

David didn't push it any further, "We need to get him help Bren…you have your friends this time, they say tough love, it worked with him before and it worked with me. It worked with us all. You're not alone dealing with him, you're home now and you have to know you came back here for a reason."

"It wasn't even my idea to come back here, it was his. I knew he had relapsed shortly after he had stopped. He thought he was hiding it well but I knew him better than that. I caught him at Steve's the night we came back but that wasn't the first time, it was just the first time I told him."

David pushed back her hair that had fallen in front of her face, "I'm here for you Bren, we all are and for Dylan."

"I know but please David…everything I told you please don't tell anyone. Please." Brenda begged.

"Bren…you can't make excuses for him anymore, you need to leave him." David said it almost coldly.

Brenda got up quickly and began pacing back and forth, "I can't…he needs me."

"He needs you to show him that if he continues this he doesn't deserve you."

"David…I can't… I am in love with him, I have him back I can't let him go again."

David got up and grabbed her arms and pulled her to face him, "You don't have him now…you being there for him every time he falls, he knows it. He knows you will be there to pick up the pieces so he continues. He needs to hit bottom and he will realize he does need you, but not to clean him up, he'll realize he needs you in his life because he loves you…not because he is dependent on your love."

Brenda broke down again, "I don't think I can." She almost whispered.

"Yes you can…cause if you don't, you'll lose him even more. So much he'll be in the ground not high in the next room."

David pulled her into him and held her. He gently rubbed down the back of her head and he got the feeling she hadn't been comforted in a long time. She was so busy with Dylan that it was obvious no one had been there for her. He could almost feel her releasing some of the burden onto him. She even felt weak in his arms. David led her back inside and sat her on the couch. She sat quietly as she stared at the floor.

"Sometimes I wish I just did it too. It must be nice to hide and run away from pain." Brenda said almost in a daze.

"Well…yeah it is for a moment…but just like with anything you come down."

Brenda continued to stare off, "Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and don't even recognize myself. I would have never tolerated this crap years ago." She exhaled.

Brenda cuddled into David's chest and closed her eyes. It felt good to be held again, really held. She knew she had released this emotional burden onto him and he still was being so comforting. It would be easier not to care so much, be so emotionally involved with Dylan. Brenda glanced down as she noticed David's hand caress her arm gently. She lifted her head and looked at him. She swallowed so hard you could see it. There was something peaceful about his eyes and she had never noticed before. She leaned out from his chest as they continued to stare at each other. The both were almost paralyzed, neither wanted to make the move to go in or just look away. Finally David didn't hold back anymore. He leaned in quickly as her lips hit his. At first Brenda didn't even close her eyes but as their lips moved together, she did and released whatever tension was between them. At that moment Brenda wasn't thinking about anything. The kiss was intense and almost rough. Brenda took her hand and moved it to the back of David's head, he didn't have hair to pull like Dylan did because it was shaved but she ran her fingers like there was. David and Brenda continued to kiss as she found herself on his lap, straddling him. David ran his hands down pushing his hooded sweatshirt down her arms. David moved down her neck as he heard her breathe out. David reached for the zipper on the back of her dress.

**

Dylan saw himself running; the lights were so bright they almost blinded him. He ran but the double doors to the emergency hospital seemed far away. The more and the faster he ran the farther away he got. Flashes of the drive, the convertible, the wind blowing in their hair. He saw the smiles and the laughing. He played it over and over in his head. He saw a room, he saw doctors, he saw her. He squeezed her hand. He saw himself crying. Dylan shifted in his sleep as his eyes fluttered. His head moved right and then his head moved left.

**

Brenda pushed David back as she felt him try and unzip her dress. "Oh my God David…I'm sorry." Brenda backed away as she covered her mouth.

"No…no I'm sorry. I'm sorry I started it." David looked down and moved his hand across his shaved head.

Brenda moved off of him slowly and looked down at him. "It's not your fault…its my fault."

"No…Bren."

"I'm a mess." Brenda shook her head not even comprehending what had just happened.

Brenda jumped suddenly as she heard Dylan scream from the bedroom. She looked at David as they both ran into the bedroom.

"Dylan…Dylan." Brenda rushed to his side.

"Oh Bren." Dylan broke down.

"Shhhhh…it was just a dream." Dylan grabbed her by her mid section and pulled her into him. Brenda stroked his hair.

"I'm sorry…I'm sorry, don't leave…please don't leave." Dylan begged in tears.

"I'm not going anywhere…I am right here." Brenda said tearfully. She looked up at David. The look she gave him was one he would never forget. This was really bad and David wasn't sure what had happened to Dylan in London but it was obviously something that surpassed the sudden death of his dad…Toni. He wanted to pull Brenda out of the room and leave Dylan alone but he knew she wouldn't leave his side. He could tell it wasn't healthy for her and Dylan had made many mistakes before but this time he was taking her down with him.

"Dylan…man, do you need anything?" David said sweetly.

"NO…GET THE HELL OUT, mind your business." Dylan tossed a shoe as it hit the side of the door. He was being nasty.

Brenda tilted her head sadly at David, she nodded the ok to leave them alone. As much as it killed him he did.

**

Brenda stretched slightly, with all the drama her buzz had definitely wore off but obviously the drama forgot to tell her hang over. She rubbed her head and slowly looked at the clock. "Uhhh 3:25...great." she mumbled. She turned over and noticed she was alone. She sat up quickly, pushing the covers off of her legs. She got up and walked into the living room which was empty. Brenda looked toward the front door and opened it quietly so she wouldn't have to wake David. She crossed her arms as the chill of the night ran across her bare shoulders. She walked into the separate garage and saw the Porsche gone. Brenda cursed to her self as she quickly moved back into the house. She gently knocked on David's door and after no answer she peaked her head in.

"David." Brenda whispered, "David." she whispered a bit louder.

David sat up quickly at the sound of her voice, "Bren? What's wrong?"

Brenda let herself in as she sat on the edge of David's bed. "Dylan's gone."

"Now? It's…" David looked at the clock, "It's 3:30 in the morning, where would he go?"

Brenda looked at him intently, "To score?"

"That's it, get his shit, we are leaving it on the porch." David got up pulling Brenda up with him.

Brenda pulled back from him, "I cant do that." she said sternly.

"Brenda…what does he have on you? This is ridiculous…what was up with that dream?"

"David…you don't understand, he doesn't have anything on me. It's not like that."

David sighed, "Should we drive around and look for him or something…Did he do this kind of stuff in London?"

"No." Brenda shook her head, "Dylan didn't have to parade around the street to get drugs. I mean he could go to one of the nearby parks and easily score in a matter of minutes. Its different here, its not like there is a drug dealers on every corner of Beverly Hills."

David nodded, she had a point. "Fine, we will wait…he is going to come back here eventually and when he does we talk to him and see what happens."

Brenda nodded slowly as she exhaled. She plopped down on bed. "It's going to be a long night."

David joined her on the bed, "Yeah." he breathed out. David looked at her, "Well…there are things we could do to pass the time."

Brenda looked over at him offended. David let out a laugh, "I'm totally kidding but you should have seen your face."

"Ha ha…yeah not the time to joke." Brenda looked at him like he was crazy.

"Sorry…I thought you…we could use a laugh, I make dumb jokes when I'm nervous."

"Laughing…I don't even remember how."

David sighed as he took his hand and rubbed down the back of her head, "Sorry." he felt embarrassed.

**

Dylan turned off his car and looked around. He wasn't exactly sure where he was but he thought he had the right place. He looked down the dark alley as he saw a man emerge. Dylan slowly got out of his car and checked his back side as he began walking toward him. Dylan looked to the right and then to the left.

"Thanks." Dylan mumbled as he stuck a folded fifty dollar bill into his hand.

The man didn't say anything as he looked down to check the money. He shoved the baggie into Dylan's hand and walked away. Dylan started back to his car. He took out his pocket knife again and brought a taste to his nose. She squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. He looked around one last time and started his car. He took a deep breath and started his way back to David's house.

Dylan slow blinked as the lights seemed to blur together. He stopped at the traffic light and blinked again. Dylan looked up as he heard the start of a siren and a bright light from the police car behind him. "Shit." Dylan whispered as he pushed the baggie between the seats. He pulled over and waited for the cop to walk over.

"License and registration." the cop said as he signed his flashlight in his face.

Dylan took a deep breath and pulled out his wallet. He took out his license and handed it over to him.

"Registration?" The cop said as he looked down at the license shining the light on it.

"Yeah." Dylan mumbled as he opened his glove box and retrieved the registration.

"Have you been drinking?" The police officer asked.

"Nope." Dylan was acting short with him.

"Can you get out of the car please?"

"Nope." Dylan said as he grabbed the license and registration back from him. "You have no just cause for stopping me, I wasn't speeding, I stopped fully at the stop light."

The police officer shined the light down to the floor, "What's that?"

"I don't know, never seen it before." Dylan lied

"Get out." The police officer said sternly.

Dylan took a deep breath and got out of the car, the police officer leaned down and picked up the bag of heroine.

The officer leaned him on the the hood of his car and began cuffing him. "You have the right to remain silent; Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law; You have the right to talk to a lawyer and have a lawyer present with you during questioning; If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be appointed for you if you so desire; If you do choose to talk to the police, you have the right to end the interview at any time. Do you understand each of these rights as I have explained them to you?"

"Yeah." Dylan answered in a raspy voice as he shook his head.

Dylan…Dylan…Dylan…Please review, let me know what your thinking. I will give everyone a chance to catch up and we will go from there, I plan on updating LF tomorrow as well. I started this story and it starting flowing like crazy so I went with it. Anyway, you know what to do and thank you guys soooo much, you have all been great!