Phase Three

Chapter 10: I Don't Get No Sleep In A Quiet Room

~.~

Rachel hung her head, clinging to the payphone at the airport as it rang in her ear. And rang. And rang. It seemed like a never-ending amount of rings before Phoebe finally picked up, accepting the collect charges.

"Rach, what happened?!" Phoebe immediately began off of Rachel's sad tone, and Rachel bit her lip, attempting to keep herself composed.

"Well," Rachel began with a sigh. "Let's just say that you are playing the role of Chandler in the Ross and Rachel Debacle, part two," Rachel laughed to herself.

"What? You love me now, too?" Phoebe responded, confused.

"No," Rachel spoke slowly. "You said he loved me…"

Phoebe paused for a second before gasping. "Wait, so, if I'm playing the role of Chandler, and I said he loves you, that means," she paused for a moment, remembering the beginning of Ross and Rachel, "that means, there's a Julie?"

"Something like that," Rachel agreed. "Only this time, I'm even more of an idiot, because I not only showed up at the airport, I also wasted three grand and flew 3500 miles to find that out…"

"Oh, Rach, but I was so sure," Phoebe tried to console her. "Wait, if I'm Chandler in this scenario, who's Julie?" Phoebe asked, realizing that Rachel hadn't exactly finished the story. "Rach?" Rachel again laughed, because if she didn't keep laughing at herself and the situation, she would surely lose it and cry. "Rach?"

"Monica," Rachel whispered.

"What?!" Phoebe exclaimed. "Did I mess up this metaphor?!"

"Nope, you got it. Perfectly," Rachel smirked. "Anyway, I gotta go. I can't-I can't talk about it. I just need to think. And eat. The only thing I've eaten since I left was on the plane here, and airline food barely qualifies as food. And this call is probably costing a fortune-"

"But you called collect."

"Yes, and you are at my apartment."

"Right, so you pay for that," Phoebe giggled. "Rach, no, don't go. What happened? Did you even talk to him?"

"For about thirty seconds, and then I just had to get out of there. So, here I am," Rachel kicked the wall beneath the payphone. "Flying standby home, so who knows when I'll get out of here, because I maxed out all of my credit cards on a stupid plane ticket to stupid London to do the stupidest thing of my life, and if that wasn't enough for one day, I also probably ruined a marriage as well!"

"Wait, you ruined a marriage, too?" Phoebe interjected, hoping to keep her from hanging up. "You've only been there, what, a couple of hours? Rach, talk me through all of this."

"I can't, honey. I-I gotta go. Hopefully I'll get on a plane soon."

"Rachel Karen Green you cannot just leave this conversation at…this!"

"Phoebs, I can't."

"Rach-"

"Phoebs," Rachel pleaded back, and Phoebe finally conceded. "I'll talk to you when I get home. Bye," Rachel sighed, hanging up the phone. She took a deep breath, trying to keep her composure, as she turned to go, pulling her bag with her as she sought out some place to eat.

~.~

Chandler leaned back against the brick wall of the hotel building, watching the sun come up. He took a drag of the cigarette in his hand, thinking that if Monica woke up and came down to find him, she would probably kill him. Rachel, on the other hand, might not be happy, but would surely not kill him. Chandler squeezed his eyes shut. He really needed to stop doing that.

It had been a long night. A long, long, long, long night. They had helped Ross search for Emily for hours, and had sat and listened as he made failed attempt after failed attempt to contact her by phone as well. He left messages on her cell, at her apartment, at her parents', and then would start the process over again. Sometime around 2 AM, Monica took the phone away from him. And then Ross had insisted they stay, not wanting to be alone.

So, they stayed. Chandler pretended to sleep on the couch in Ross's suite, not wanting to have to talk to Monica. However, he hadn't slept at all. Instead he'd spent the entire night thinking about Rachel. He wanted nothing more than to go after her and see if she was still at the airport, wanting to sit down and talk to her, actually talk.

She had ended it. She even agreed to that. She had ended it twice. He was not wrong in thinking that. He was entirely correct. He couldn't stop the sting in his heart and the burn in the back of his throat at that thought, though. He wasn't entirely correct. He was a fucking idiot, because, even though he loved Rachel, he let her break up with him. Twice.

But she loved Ross.

Chandler closed his eyes, his heart stopping as realization sank in.

He had a sudden flash back to the end of his relationship with Kathy, Joey's words ringing in his ears after he had jumped to conclusions about Kathy cheating on him without her ever confirming it.

Dude, tell me she actually told you this.

Tell me she actually told you this.

She never actually told him this. Not once. Not once did those words come out of Rachel's mouth. She never actually admitted to loving Ross still. Not once. She had come to London for him, not for Ross. Ross had said her name, yet she had fled. She didn't come there looking for Ross. After Ross said her name, who did she go looking for?

"Fuck," Chandler whispered under his breath, putting his cigarette out as he headed back towards the door. He ran inside, heading up to his hotel room to shower and pack, deciding that Ross and Monica wouldn't really miss him that much since they needed to get to the airport in a matter of hours anyway.

He needed to get home. If Rachel was on her way home already, he most definitely needed to get home.

~.~

Rachel sat at an empty terminal, about to give up. She had been waiting to get on a flight home since the night before and was about to lose it. She just wanted to get home. Get home and shower and probably cry a bit. Mostly, she just wanted to be home and away from that stupid city. She hated London, which, really, wasn't fair since the only part of London she had seen had been the airport, the old mess of a building Ross's wedding had been in, and the Marriott. But still, she hated London, cursed it for ruining everything.

She never should have come.

So, she sat in a chair in the empty terminal, another flight gone without her.

"Rach?" Rachel looked up at the sound of her name, Ross walking towards her.

"He-hey," she forced a smile, standing up. "What are-what are you doing here?"

"Ha, now there's a question," Ross shook his head. "I'm waiting for my wife, whom I haven't seen since our wedding, to show up for our honeymoon," he laughed. "Oh, the plane started boarding twenty minutes ago. I'm sure they're leaving any minute now…."

"Oh, Ross," Rachel touched his arm. "I'm sorry, I never should have come…"

"No, Rach, don't be sorry. I'm glad you came," Ross smiled. "I'm the idiot who said the wrong name at the alter," he unsuccessfully attempted a forced laugh. "God, I am an idiot, huh? I mean, I thought she really might still show up today…"

"You're not an idiot, Ross. Okay, well, the thing at the wedding, not your brightest moment. But today," Rachel shook her head. "You're not an idiot. You're just a guy very much in love."

"Same thing," Ross again laughed, and Rachel recognized his laugh. It was either laugh at yourself or cry. "So, uh, when's your flight?"

"Oh, I'm flying standby. Have been for about 12 hours, so," she held up her fingers, which were crossed. "Any minute now…"

"Right," Ross nodded, looking up as the voice from the PA system from the next terminal over was barely audible.

"This is the final boarding call for flight 1066 to Athens…"

"And that's that," Ross shrugged his shoulders. "Guess I'll buy a ticket to New York instead."

"You're just gonna let her go?" Rachel asked, and Ross again shrugged, thinking for a moment. "So, the past couple of months were just for nothing? This whole trip, this wedding, were for nothing? You're just letting all of that go? 24 hours ago, you wanted to be with her forever, and one stupid fight, and you're just…letting her go?"

Ross thought for a moment, shaking he head. "You know what? No, no I'm not," he stood up straighter. "I'm gonna go back to her apartment and sit outside and wait, because she has to come home eventually, right? I just, I can't leave here without her. I mean, I know I'm an idiot, but, god, do I love her…"

"Well, there you go," Rachel smiled, patting his arm. "Go get her."

"Thank you so much Rachel," Ross moved to hug her. "Actually, you know what?"

"Huh?" Rachel pulled back.

"You should take these," he held out his tickets. "I mean, they're nonrefundable. We're not gonna use them. The whole week there is paid for. You-you should go. I mean, someone should use all of that, right?"

"What? You want me to go on your honeymoon?"

"Don't think of it as that. Just think of it as an all expenses paid vacation," Ross shrugged. "I mean, why not? Someone might as well go."

Rachel stared at the tickets for a moment. Getting the hell out of the airport sounded fantastic, as did not going home to Chandler and Monica at the moment. Maybe a week away, alone, was exactly what she needed. She finally smiled, reaching for the tickets. "Why the hell not?"

~.~

"Oh, yay, you guys are back!" Phoebe hurried over to the door as Monica, Chandler, and Joey walked in, all of them hugging her as they walked in. "How was London?!"

"Not as good as New York!" Joey exclaimed angrily, grabbing his suitcase and heading out the still open door. "The city so nice, they named it twice!" he added over his shoulder before walking into his own apartment.

"Um, okay then," Phoebe dismissed what Joey had said, turning back to Monica and Chandler.

"Hey, is Rachel back?" Monica asked, walking over to the refrigerator and grabbing a bottle of water.

"Oh, no, Ross called. Rachel went to Greece," Phoebe explained, and Chandler's heart dropped. Why did he have to be wrong about one thing after another after another with her? Rachel went to Greece with Ross…

"Hey, I'm gonna go check on Joey," Chandler mumbled, heading out the door and closing it quickly before either girl could say anything to him.

Monica looked after him and sighed. He had been avoiding her since the night they slept together. He'd even slept the entire flight home, or at least pretended to sleep. He obviously thought that night was a horrible mistake, but she couldn't believe he wouldn't at least talk to her about it. It was Chandler. He wasn't supposed to avoid her. Was he really going to let one stupid, drunk night ruin everything between them?

Phoebe cleared her throat, bringing Monica out of her thoughts. "Hey, I'm gonna take off. You look a little jet-lagged," Phoebe nodded at her, grabbing her purse and heading towards the door.

"See you later, Phoebs," Monica smiled as she left.

"Bye."

Monica sighed, walking towards the door. She reached for the doorknob, but hesitated, turning back around. Shaking her head, she turned back and opened the door, heading across the hall.

"Hey," she greeted Chandler, who was standing alone in the kitchen.

"Hey."

"Is Joey here?"

Chandler shook his head. "He went down to get coffee."

"Okay, look, I know you're kind of avoiding me right now, but…I just wanted to say thank you. For that night," Monica smiled, taking another step closer to him. "I mean, I was really going through a hard time, with my mother being herself, and that guy thinking I was Ross's mother…"

"Right," Chandler laughed, taking a step closer to her as well. "I'm sorry I've been avoiding you, I just, I'm amazing at screwing up any kind of relationship, but I think I have the friend thing down okay…"

"Yea, you do," Monica laughed. "I think you're better at the other part than you think you are, though," she added, to which Chandler shrugged. "So, we're okay?" Monica asked, moving even closer.

"We're okay," Chandler agreed, wrapping his arms around her as she hugged him. He kissed her hair, tightening his arms around her. Monica sighed, not letting go. Instead, when he pulled back slightly, she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him.

And he kissed back. A voice in the back of his head kept telling him this was bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. 27 years of next to no women in his life, and, all of a sudden, there were two. At the same time. Neither of whom he wanted to hurt, but he had a feeling that being with either of them would eventually end up hurting the other one once they found out.

He must have done something somewhere along the line to piss off some sort of relationship god. Was this karma? Was he this bad of a person?

Well, at that moment, he was. He loved Rachel, but was still kissing Monica.

But Rachel had gone to Greece with Ross. Why couldn't he kiss Monica?

It was like there were a cartoon devil and angel, one on each of his shoulders, each arguing against the other. No, Rachel still loved Ross, and for all he knew, she was actually back with Ross, so there was nothing wrong with this. But, at the same time, there was a nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach that this wasn't right. As much as he had always thought something might happen with Monica, this wasn't how it was supposed to happen. She wasn't supposed to be just a rebound, a stand-in for her best friend. He was going to hurt her so badly if he kept this up, and he couldn't stand the thought of hurting her.

Chandler finally ended the kiss, shaking his head as he pulled away. "I can't. I-I'm sorry, Mon. I can't…"

Monica just nodded in response, moving towards the door. "I-I'll see you later, Chandler," she whispered, walking out the door. Chandler sighed, watching after her, the look on her face adding to the broken-heart feeling he already felt over Rachel going to Greece with Ross.

Chandler finally laughed out loud as he walked towards his bedroom, wondering when his love life had become a twisted plot out of one of his mother's novels….

~.~

Well, this chapter took a turn I hadn't originally planned on…

I've been slacking on the updates lately…sorry! Writer's block and real life both getting in the way ;) But, thanks to a couple of late nights of not being able to sleep, I wrote this and most of the next part of I'll Be There for You.

Anywho, review, and I'll try to continue soon!