Thanks so very much for the brilliant reviews for chapter 12! You guys are seriously the best.
MrsMusgraveTNG – your review meant so much, thank you! I wanted to depict a real relationship, a love that thrives despite huge obstacles. Thanks again, you are truly awesome!!
DontMindBnCrazy – Why thank you! I so want a beach house too, just gotta find my Ashley lol.
LoveAsh87 – So glad you liked the chapter! I always saw Ashley as the romantic sort
mutt009 – Thanks a million! I listened to that song, sleep like a child by Joss Stone, and you're totally right it fits that final scene beautifully. I'm touched that the impending end of this fic saddens you. It amazes me that people actually like my writing enough to care. I really hope you enjoy the last bit.
hugbuddy13 – Yeah I though a house of their own would help them have a fresh start. Thanks so much for your review.
2bz2breading – Yeah a beach house isn't cheap but what else does Ash have to spend her money on besides her girl? Thank you so much for your kind review!
I overestimated when I said there'd be four more chapters and I'm so sorry about that. In my original plan for this story I had 15 chapters and then the epilogue, but I cut much of that away because it wasn't needed and took away from the story I was trying to tell.
I am sorry to say this is the last chapter, with the epilogue to follow shortly.
Here is Chapter 13, sorry for the delay!
You Have To Go There To Come Back
Chapter 13
Ashley's POV
I stood in the door way, leaning against the frame and watched as she straightened the cap on her head. She added a few bobby pins to keep it from sliding from her silky golden hair. She had a small smile on her face, a smile that I'm sure was a mixture of accomplishment, pride and relief. Spencer ran her hands down over the black gown she was wearing and adjusted the sky blue, valedictorian sash that hung over her shoulders.
Four years of hard work, all night study sessions and endless hours in the UCLA library and my girl was graduating. Her final project, a film that followed a lesbian couple through the trials and tribulations of using IVF to conceive, had won three awards and was nominated for another four. I was so proud of her, she was truly an inspiration.
In her time at UCLA she had moved from working at MTV to working for an independent film company that did a lot of documentaries about the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community. It wasn't has high paying but it was more in line with her passions. Her own docos had won several awards and the short independent film she'd written, directed and acted in had won a few awards at small film festivals. Kyla starred in that one and even scored some acting awards as well. Did I mention I was proud of her? Because damn my girl is something else!
Her eyes met mine in the mirror and her reflection beamed lovingly at me. I stepped up behind her and lay my hands on her shoulders, squeezing gently. "I am so proud of you baby. You have achieved so much and worked so hard, you also look so beautiful right now." Spencer lifted her hands up to cover mine, her eyes locked on mine in the mirror.
"Thank you so much. I never would have gotten through this whole college thing without you. You gave me so much support and I just wanted to tell you that I love you Ash," Spencer murmured. I kissed her softly on the cheek, careful not to leave a lipstick mark on her.
"C'mon graduate let's get you to the ceremony, you know if we're late your Mom will just assume we're having sex again!" I teased. Spencer just groaned, picked up her bag and followed me down the stairs. I snagged the camera on the way out and forced her to pose for a few shots on our deck overlooking the beach before I would let her get in the car.
The drive to the UCLA campus was short and filled with Spencer's excited yabbering. I just smiled and let her voice wash over me. She had achieved so much in the last few years, but still always made the time for me, for us. She was truly an incredible woman who I just fell more and more in love with every single day.
I parked the Porsche and we walked hand in hand to the lawn where they had a stage, bleachers and seats set up for the graduation ceremony that was about to take place. Almost as soon as we arrived a very tearful Mrs. C bolted up to us and pulled Spencer into a bone-crushing hug. It's no exaggeration to say that Mrs. C's hugs could almost put a pro-wrestler's choke holds to shame. The woman was impossible to understand as she clung to her daughter and sobbed out unintelligible words. I couldn't help but laugh, earning me a glare from the older Carlin woman.
As soon as Mrs. C let go of her daughter, Mr. C stepped up and swept Spencer into his arms. He lifted her off her feet and swung her around. Spencer giggled and squealed joyously. She is such a Daddy's girl. They shared a bond that no one could touch. Mrs. C put her arm around me as we looked fondly on at the love and affection between father and daughter.
We were standing around catching up when we were joined by Glen, Chelsea, Aiden and Kyla. Glen and Chelsea still had that newly wed glow about them, even after a year of marriage, they had gotten married exactly three months after Chelsea got back for good from art school in Paris. Kyla and Aiden were a month away from their big day. We were one big family now, officially. Spencer hugged Chelsea carefully, mindful of the baby bump. Yeah that's right Spencer was going to be an Aunty in about four months, I think she may be almost more excited than Chelsea and Glen.
Once the greetings and congratulations had been exchanged Spencer left us to go find her seat and join her fellow graduates, while we went off in search of our places up in the bleachers. I sat down next to Mrs. C who reached over and held my hand. We were both so excited and so very proud. I will admit most of the ceremony was boring as hell, I mean the old dude who did the commencement address was so old and decrepit I'm sure he keeled over as soon as his bit was done.
I will admit I may have dozed off a bit, but was instantly awake and alert the second the name, "Spencer Carlin," crossed the dean's lips. Both me and Paula snapped to attention and started taking photos like a couple of rabid paparazzi. I could hear Glen and Aiden laughing at us, but screw them. This was my Baby's big day and I was capturing as much of it as I possibly could. This would be a day we would always want to remember.
Spencer walked gracefully to the microphone to make her valedictorian speech. She had been working on this speech relentlessly for weeks, she so wanted to get it perfect. She had stressed herself to the point of tears and a minor hissy fit or two preparing for this. Spencer smiled out over the audience and I saw Paula elbow Mr. C who steadied the camcorder he was holding while double checking he had it recording. Spencer bit her lip, an adorable nervous habit of hers and cleared her throat before beginning.
"Dean, distinguished guests, friends and families and my fellow graduates. It is a huge honour to be standing up here in front of you all today. I am sure we are all experiencing the same emotions on this monumental occasion, well outside of my intense stage fright," Everyone laughed making Spencer grin wider before she continued, "I think today we are all feeling pride, accomplishment, sadness, relief and gratitude to all our loved ones who helped get us through. It has been a long journey to get here. A journey that was at times wonderful, terrifying, stressful and fulfilling. It has been a time of growth, of change and of discovery and it has been a privilege to share this journey together.
I wanted to share something personal with you all today. A few years ago life got in the way and me and my girlfriend broke up. During the time we were apart a very wise friend of mine gave me some advice. She told me that if you don't strive to be the best version of yourself you are not only short changing yourself but also the people who love you. During our time apart me and my girlfriend worked to become the best versions of ourselves and now," Spencer paused and her eyes locked on mine. In a place full of thousands of people she found me. I felt tears rolling down my face but made no move to brush them away. The love and pride I felt for this girl was overpowering me.
"Now we are together and more in love than ever. I want to thanks my girl for loving me and supporting me. Ashley I love you and I couldn't have done this without you. You are my reason, my inspiration and my partner in life.
I hope that you all take away a multitude of wonderful memories and life lessons away from your time here at UCLA, but if you take one thing away from today I hope it is the desire to always strive to be the best version of yourselves. Be proud of all you have accomplished and be grateful to everyone who helped you get here. Congratulations." Spencer beamed as everyone rose to their feet to give her a standing ovation. Both Paula and I cried as we clapped, both so proud of the woman on the stage.
Spencer stepped down and took her seat, giving me a wink as she passed by. I don't think it was physically possible for my grin to get wider. The rest of the ceremony went really quickly. When Spencer was called up to get her degree we all went nuts. Like psycho crazy nuts. Arthur put his fingers in his mouth and let out a lot of loud whistles. Glen actually stood on his seat and cheered while punching the air above him. Kyla grabbed my camera and snapped more photos than I thought was possible while screaming like a banshee. Chelsea clapped and yelled while doing a little dance on the spot, while Aiden cat called and wolf whistled. I really hate him sometimes and if he'd been sitting next to me I might have had to injure him in some way! Maybe render him sterile or something. Me and Paula just bawled like babies and clapped until our hands stung. As she walked off stage with her degree Spencer caught my eye and mouthed, 'I love you.' I beamed through my tears and mouthed back, 'love you too.'
As soon as the ceremony was over I was up out of my seat and running through the crowd to get to my girl. I'll admit I may have elbowed a granny out of my way, but if you had a girlfriend like Spencer you'd use any means necessary to get to her too. She must have had the same thought because the next thing I knew my angel was throwing herself into my waiting arms. I kissed her tenderly before murmuring into her ear, "I am so proud of you!"
"Thanks Baby, I know I already said it, and I said it to thousands of people, but I couldn't have done any of this without you my love. Ahhh it can't be normal to be this happy and this in love!" Spencer shrieked as she clung to me. I couldn't agree more.
"Yeah Baby, we are far from normal," I smirked at her and kissed her lovingly. We pulled apart just as the other's joined us. Spencer was swarmed in a mass of hugs and congratulations as Arthur kept filming and Kyla kept snapping photos. I just stood back and basked in the joy of seeing my girl so happy. She gave so much of herself to everyone around her so it was nice to see her reaping the rewards of her hard work.
We reconvened at Spencer's and my house where we quickly set Arthur up behind the grill and opened a bottle of champagne. I nearly keeled over from shock when Kyla opted for water. "Wait Ky, since when do you say no to the good stuff?" I teased with a smirk.
Kyla shared a tender smile with Aiden before announcing, "Well I guess since I found out that we're going to have a baby!"
I beamed and pulled my baby sister into my arms. Wow I was going to be an aunty! That was kinda cool. "That is so incredible you two! God I'm so happy for you."
"Why are we happy and for who?" Glen asked as he, Spencer and Chelsea joined me Kyla, Aiden, Paula and Arthur on the deck with platters of food.
Aiden wrapped an arm around Kyla and smiled sweetly down at her, "Well Kyla and I…well we're having a baby!"
Spencer squealed and threw her arms around the two of them. Damn my girl is so cute when she's excited. Once they were able to extract themselves from Spencer's octopus like grip, Aiden shook hands with Glen before being pulled into a hug and Chelsea and Kyla started rambling on about how their kids would grow up together.
I glanced to the side and saw my girl leaning against the railing around the deck looking in at the excited people. She had a strange smile on her lips, it was half joyous but also half wistful. I moved to her side and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. Spencer snuggled into my side and rested her head on my shoulder. "What are you thinking Baby?"
Spencer leaned more heavily against me and sighed, "Nothing really Babe, just feeling that everything is practically perfect. I am so happy for Aiden and Ky."
I had a feeling this wasn't the entire story but I know my girl, she'd tell me when she was ready. I kissed her softly on the head and lead her back to the group. I made sure everyone had a glass before proposing a toast, "Firstly here's to Spencer, congrats baby we are all so proud of you! Also congrats to Kyla and Aide and commiserations to the poor kid who has me for an aunty," everyone laughed, "But most importantly here's to family."
"To family," everyone echoed. Spencer locked her ocean eyes on mine as she spoke the words so softly she practically mouthed them. She had that strange smile on her face again and to be quite honest I was starting to get a little scared…ok so I was shitting myself. I was dying to know what was going on in that head of hers.
I watched as she went up to her Mom and whispered something in her ear. Paula beamed and pulled her daughter into a warm embrace. Paula planted a kiss on Spencer's cheek before she released her. Spencer gave her Mom a nervous smile and turned back to the group. I lost her in the crowd and got talking to Chelsea about the baby and the gallery she and Glen had opened.
After about five minutes I felt a familiar pair of arms circle my waist. I willingly leaned back against her warm body as Chelsea winked at me before walking off to join her husband. "Join me for a walk on the beach beautiful?" She whispered against my ear. I nodded and let her lead me by the hand down the steps at the side of our deck and out to the sand.
Spencer's POV
I held her hand in mine as we walked barefoot, hand in hand along the sand. The night was still and the only sound was the gentle crash of the waves as they hit the beach. The stars overhead seemed to twinkle just for us. It was just as I hoped it would be, just as I had imagined it. It was perfect. I stopped and turned to face her, holding her hand tightly in mine. She had the most beautiful smile on her lips as her eyes held mine in a gaze full of love and devotion.
"The beach has always been a special place for us hasn't it?" She nodded but stayed silent to let me continue, "It was at the beach where I first told you I was gay, where I first realised I was in love with you even though you were royally pissing me off, where we came the night we got back together and where you brought me the night you asked me to move in with you…again." I paused and tenderly wiped a tear from her cheek with my thumb.
"Even before all that the beach has always been special to me. I never told you this but after Clay died and you went to Europe I used to come down to the beach most nights. I would sit in the sand and watch the waves. It made me feel close to you no matter how great the distance between us. It is a place of peace for me, a place where I always feel safe. I could sit there under the stars and feel you with me. Ok so this might sound lame but I've always thought of the beach, the ocean and the shore as a relationship, it's almost like a love affair."
Ashley raised her eyebrow at me, making me chuckle, "Just hear me out gorgeous. Its like no matter how the tide turns the ocean always returns to the sand, like it can't bear to stay away. They are connected eternally Ash, and that's how I feel about you. No matter what happens in my life you are my shore, my beach and I can't bear to be away from you."
I swallowed and tried to blink back the tears forming in my eyes, unsuccessfully I might add. "Ashley Christine Davies I love you and I always will. I know that there will be good times and I know there will be bad, but what will never change is how I feel about you. I want to build a life with you, a family. I want to spend each and every day of my life with you. I want to go to sleep with you in my arms and wake up beside you for the rest of my life. In short I want everything with you." Ashley was staring at me wide-eyed, a nose-crinkling smile on her face as tears glistened on her cheeks. I bit my lip and lowered myself onto one knee, ok so it's a corny and predictable move but I wanted to do this right.
Ashley silently watched me with an expression I hoped was from excitement and held her hand to her heart, which I think was pounding just as fast as mine. I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small navy blue velvet jeweller's box. I opened it up to reveal a black diamond, surrounded by small clear diamonds set in a thin white gold band.
I looked up and locked my eyes with the mocha ones I loved so much, "Baby, I loved you before I knew you and I will love you always. You are my best friend, my family, my lover and my only. You are my first and forever love Ashley. My love, do you wanna marry me?" I asked as more tears spilled down both of our cheeks.
Ashley pulled me to my feet and crashed her lips onto mine as she crushed my body against hers in a fierce embrace. We broke apart breathlessly and rested our foreheads against each other. "So is that a yes?" I asked as I gazed into her eyes.
"You know it is," She murmured huskily before capturing my lips in a kiss so full of passion it made me literally weak in the knees and I sunk down in to the sand with my girl still in my arms. I lay back in the warm sand as Ashley settled on top of me. We kissed lovingly and hungrily for a while, both laughing and crying at the same time.
Finally I got to my feet and helped her up, "Come on my love we have a celebration to get back to and my God do we have a lot to celebrate today!" I wrapped my arm around her shoulder as hers found its way around my waist. We fit together perfectly, like we were always meant to be.
"I love you so much Spencer. This is the single happiest moment of my entire life," Ashley murmured as she leaned into me while we walked.
"Me too Babe, me too. I think this is one of those illusive perfect moments." I kissed her cheek tenderly as we started walking up the stairs to join our family on the deck.
As soon as we ascended the last step my Mom ran up to us and everyone turned around expectantly, "Well?" Mom demanded a huge smile of anticipation on her face, a smile which was mirrored on the faces of all present.
"Wait did you all know Spencer was going to propose to me tonight?" Ashley asked incredulously. Everyone nodded and grinned. What can I say? I was excited and had to share it with everyone. Ashley shook her head and laughed, "First time any of you shits have ever been able to keep a secret!"
"So are we having another wedding?" Paula cut it.
I smiled adoringly at the amazing woman in my arms and murmured, "Yeah she said yes." Ashley held up her left hand and flashed everyone the engagement ring which now glittered from its rightful place on her ring finger. Everyone started cheering and clapping as they surrounded us. We got separated as our family pulled us into warm hugs of congratulations. I held her gazed as I hugged my Dad and knew that I would spend the rest of my life loving that woman.
"Ok so the delicacies from the grill are ready so let's sit down and eat!" Dad called out as he hugged me. Before he released me he leaned in and whispered in my ear, "I am so happy for you honey, you two will be so happy together." I kissed him softly on the cheek, God I love my Dad. He was the biggest and loudest supporter of my relationship with Ashley in the beginning. I'll admit it, I'm a total Daddy's girl.
We all convened around the large table we had out on our deck. I slid my chair close to my girl's and held her hand in my lap. I couldn't stop looking at her and relishing in the fact that this beautiful, intense, funny, surprising, intelligent, talented, loving woman was mine. If I'm honest I fell in love with her the day I met her, it just took me a while to realise it. We had a love that was stronger than any force I had ever encountered and I just knew that we would last.
"Spencer? Spencer! You zoned out there, what were you thinking about?" My Mom asked as she helped herself to some salad.
I was shocked from my inner ramblings and just blurted out the first thing that came to mind, "I'm marrying Ashley Davies." Everyone stopped what they were doing and I was hit with a chorus of 'awws' making me blush a rather spectacular scarlet.
"Oh Baby, you are too sweet. I love you so much," Ashley murmured as she leaned over to press as gentle kiss on my rosy cheeks. I just grinned like a crazy person and brought her hand to my lips.
My Mom's excited shriek and the flash of a camera brought us back to the present. Grinning sheepishly at each other we turned back to our family and started to eat our dinner. "So girls, when do you want to get married?" Mom asked.
Ok that sound you're hearing is me choking on my food while Ashley giggled beside me, "Mom! We only just got engaged! We haven't even talked about any of that yet."
"Ok, ok, but you don't want to leave it too long, gotta start having the grandkids so your kids can grow up with their cousins. Oh and by the way I have some brochures in the car that discuss your, uh, options for getting pregnant. By the way which one of you is going to have the babies?" Mom looked at as expectantly. I think I was doing a rather impressive impression of a dying fish.
I chanced a glance at Ashley, whose eyes were bugging out of her head as her mouth hung open. Everyone else at the table laughed, while Mom continued to stare at us waiting for our response. I turned to my girl and then grinned, "Hmm I think I see Ashley having a date with the turkey baster!"
Ashley's mouth fell open again and she stared at me in shock, "What? What the fuck just happened?"
I laughed, "Don't worry honey I'm teasing you. Mom we just got engaged, let us enjoy that for a while before we start worrying about the whole baby thing. We've got time." I smiled tenderly at my girl who beamed back. I lay a hand on her thigh and squeezed gently.
"Ok, but I'll hang onto those brochures just in case," Mom said. I rolled my eyes and took a sip of my champagne. They drove me crazy sometimes but I loved the people around that table, my family. The brought out the best and worst in me and loved me regardless of which side of me was on show. My parents were the epitome of what love should be, it wasn't perfect but it was real.
They loved each other deeply, flaws and all. They struggled and fought but always made it through because they genuinely loved each other, they were a team. I loved them so very much.
I looked over at my big brother. Glen had grown up more than any of us. He had become the man I always knew he could be, and all for the love of Chelsea. He still brought out the old Glen every now and then but he was every inch a man in love and that had changed him into the best version of himself. I was so proud of my big doofus brother.
Then there was Kyla and Aiden, they had certainly had a rollercoaster ride to get to where they were, not quite as dramatic as my relationship with the older Davies sister but still pretty crazy. They loved with an intensity that would see them through, of that I was certain. Their child was so lucky that it was being born into a family like theirs.
Then finally there was Ashley. The love of not only my life but my eternity. She was my soulmate, partner, lover, friend and family. There were no moments, big or small, in my life that I didn't want to share with her. She was the only person who understood me completely and who could read me so well. She was the person I wanted with me when all my dreams came true. She was my one and only, my first and forever love.
She felt my eyes on her and turned to face me, brown locking on blue. She smiled, that beautiful sweet smile that I know is reserved only for me and tenderly cupped my cheek in her hands. No words were needed, our eyes articulated the magnitude of the feelings swimming within us. I leaned my face into her hand, tilting my head slightly. Her smile widened into that blinding, nose-crinkling grin I loved so much as she leaned towards me. I met her half way and we lost ourselves in a kiss. That kiss was a promise, a vow which I will never break.
I love you Ashley Davies, forever and always.
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I hope you enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you for the wonderful support and encouragement along the way.
The epilogue will be posted soon.