This Isn't Happening

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KRISTEN

Camilla. Camilla Belle. Camilla Belle was at my front door. Camilla fucking Belle was at my fucking front door. Fuck.

I laughed euphorically, and rested my arm on the door. "What the hell do you want?" I seethed.

I really couldn't believe that she would even have the audacity to come to my house, that I share with Rob, who is my husband.

"He's mine. Always has been."

"Oh, really? Well then why is he married to me, living with me, having sex with me, and expecting children with me?" I asked sarcastically.

"He feels sorry for you. Because you got knocked up when you were young, he didn't want to go to jail, and he didn't think it was right to leave you alone with a baby all by yourself, but you see sweetie, he's been screwing me on the side." She sneered.

"Yea, okay. I think you might need a psychiatrist, because you're fucking crazy." I was about to shut the door when I heard Rob yell from the stairs.

"What the hell is this!?"

ROB

I walked over to my wife, who was talking to Camilla. I couldn't believe this. Seriously, what the hell did she want? Was she that crazy that she thinks she can show up, and think that I would want her?

"Okay, look. I'm going to make this very clear to you so we get a good understanding." I started.

She licked her lips, and rose her eyebrows. "Well, let's hear it."

"I don't want you. I don't fucking want you. I never did. NEVER. I never loved you. I will never want you. And if you ever, EVER speak to my wife again, you'll wish you didn't even know my name."

She giggled. She fucking giggled. "You're funny." She stated.

"Oh, am I?" I asked.

"If you think for one second that I bought that shit you just said to me, you should look over your life. I don't believe you."

Kristen punched her in the nose. I almost laughed, but as Kristen lurched for her, I grabbed her by the shoulders.

"Fucking bitch !" She shouted.

She struggled against my arms, but I held her shoulders tightly on my grasp.

"You better fucking leave because I swear to god--" Kristen started.

"Aright, I'm going…but just remember…he doesn't love you." She snickered.

She really is psychotic.

KRISTEN

I forcefully pushed Rob away from me, and walked into the house. Was I really going to believe that crazy bitch over my own husband?

I turned back around. "Have you been…seeing her?" I questioned.

Rob looked nauseated. "Are you joking Kristen?" He said, clearly amused.

"Something funny?" I asked.

"Sweetheart, do you really believe that I would want her? I love you. Only you. I swear."

"Yea well, you've sworn about a lot of things." Fucking pregnancy hormones.

"Kristen…I didn't cheat on you, nor will I ever cheat on you." He said completely serious.

I nodded my head, and walked towards him. "I'm sorry, I was just---not expecting that."

"I know, I'm so sorry."

"No, it isn't your fault."

I pulled him back upstairs, and into the bedroom.

THREE MONTHS LATER

It was a week since Lily turned one. She was going through one of those phases where she wouldn't let mommy out of her sight. I recently had an interview with OK!, and I had to have Rob stand there, so she would be able to see me. I of course had no problem with it. I loved the relationship I had with my daughter. I always wanted that.

I was seven months pregnant, and I was starting to think that it would be impossible to get all of this weight off of me. I don't think It was as hard as it would be this time with Lily, because of course, there was only one baby inside of me, and now there was two.

After the interview was done, Rob decided to take Lily and I out for lunch. "Where do you want to go, love?" He asked me.

"I don't know…Lily?" I looked at my daughter, and as I called her name, her head instantly snapped up. She had just started saying small words she knew, and heard. Her first words were of course, "Momma, and Dadda." She would crawl around the house, chanting, "Momma, dadda!"

"Where do you want to go, Lily?"

"Piggy. Momma." I giggled at her choice of words.

"Momma." She whispered.

"You want to go to McDonald's?"

"Momma." She repeated.

Rob looked over to me. "McDonald's." He nodded.

We sat at one of the outside tables at the fast food restaurant. I had Lily on my lap, feeding her small pieces of French fries. I laughed at how she dragged her toy horse across my swollen stomach.

There were a couple of stupid paparazzi taking pictures of us.

Rob reached his hand out to Lily, and she extended her hand out to his. He took her small hand in his, while she paid no more attention to her plastic horse. We were in the midst of getting everything situated in the new house. It was big, and everything I hoped for. (Picture on profile)

I felt the babies start to kick, and Lily started getting nervous, and started crying. I handed her to Rob as I rubbed my stomach.

Rob cooed to Lily, "Shh, ladybug, it's okay. It's alright." He kissed her temple as she sniffled through her tiny nostrils.

2 MONTHS LATER

I've been sitting in this fucking hospital bed for twenty two hours. Waiting. I've been in labor for twenty two hours, and I was only six centimeters dilated. I didn't know how much more of this I could take. Everyone was just waiting around, and nothing seemed to be happening. Rob was sitting in the oversized chair next to me, with his head in his hands, obviously exhausted. My back arched as another contraction raked through my body as I screamed out. Rob's head instantly flew up, as he grasped my hand. I looked up to see a nurse coming into the room.

She smiled as I tried to keep myself calm.

She lifted the sheet, and checked how dilated I was. "Well hun, it shouldn't be long now. I'm going to go get the doctor." She smiled at me as I returned.

She left my legs in the stirrups as she left, which made me antsy, thinking that she was going to get the doctor so that I could start pushing, and that scared the living shit out of me. I had done this all before, but now I had to get two babies out of me.

"Rob…I'm scared." I admitted.

He placed his hand on my exposed thigh, and looked dead into my eyes.

"There is absolutely nothing to be scared of. I'm going to be right here with you the entire time." He kissed my forehead.

I tried to smile. My lips were quivering, and my teeth chattering from my nerves.

A few minutes later, the doctor walked in with a tray of instruments. I prayed that after ripping my poor vagina the first time, that he wouldn't do something like that again. I looked to see what the tray consisted of. There were large things that looked like salad tossers, forceps, a scalpel, a suction tube, a medical clips, and something that looked like a wood widener. I almost shit myself. He wouldn't use all of those things, would he?

(Listen to "Stop Crying Your Heart Out" by Oasis)

"Come on baby, you can do it. I know you can." Rob soothed in my ear.

"Ahh!" I must have screamed about fifty times throughout this hour. I had been pushing for about an hour now, and the baby's head wasn't even crowning; and this was only the first one.

I pushed again. "Ahhh! Rob, I can't. I-- Ahh!" 'I can't do this!" I shouted.

"Yes you can! Come on!" He shouted back.

I looked warily at him, before gripping his hand, and the edge of the bed and pushing harder than I have the entire time.

"That's great Kristen, another push like that and the baby should start crowning." The doctor smiled to me.

Out in the waiting room, was everyone. Ashley, Nikki, Dakota, Kellan, Jackson, Elizabeth, Peter, his wife; Jennie, and Cam.

I was jerked back to reality when something sharp cut across my thin walls. I clenched Rob's hand harder. "Stop!" I shouted.

The doctor put down the scissors. "The baby isn't coming out the right way, Kristen, so I'm going to try to bring the baby down with the forceps. Are you alright?"

I nodded my head. "Yes." I breathed out.

A few seconds later, I felt large probes enter my hole. I felt something being pulled out of me, so I buried my face into Rob's shirt. He was now standing up, holding me.

A few minutes later, I heard the cry of my first baby boy. I gripped Rob's shirt, as I felt him shift, probably trying to see the baby.

The nurse handed Rob the baby, as I was forced to again, bear down and push, but before I did so, I got a quick glimpse of my beautiful baby boy. He had Rob's reddish, bronze hair, but he had deep green eyes like my own. As I continued to scream, and push my baby out, I ran through my head how I would get to go home with two new beautiful son's.

I pushed once, and suddenly felt something like a bubble pop. I screamed, out of worry at the sudden wetness I felt. "Come on baby, you're strong, come on" My husband encouraged.

I knew that I was starting to bleed out. I read about these things. It was more common with twins.

(Please play either "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol, or "Broken" by Lifeouse)

I knew that if the bleeding was too severe, that the mother's survival chance would be slim to none, and I started thinking that I may never be able to raise my sons, or see my daughter or beautiful husband again. I thought about if this may be my last moments of life. If this was it for me. I started hyperventilating, and I felt Rob quickly stand up, and hover over me as one of the nurses quickly rushed to my side and out on an oxygen mask.

"Kristen!" Rob yelled. "You stay with me! I can't loose you!"

I pushed, and pushed until I heard my last baby cry.

'Your going to be fine. Your going to be fine.' I heard my baby boy's crying, and started myself crying. I reached for my husband, scared to death that I would never see him again.

"Rob…I'm---I'm scared. I don't want to die."

'Kristen! Don't talk like that!" He shouted at me.

I clasped his hand as I felt a sharp stab in my chest. The last thing I heard was the pinging of the now flat heart monitor, and my husband screaming.