A/N: Okay, here we go . . .

Midna: Yay! The author said we could do the disclaimer for this chapter!

Link: Hooray.

Random Fan Girls: OMG! IT'S LINK! WE LOVE YOU LINK!

Link: Well, it's seems I'm quite the ladies man tonight . . .

Midna: What the heck is your problem you crazy people?! This is parody Link. He's as dumb as a rock!

Link: Hey! I'll have you know that I am smarter than the average carrot!

Midna: What?!

Link: You said I was as dumb as a rock. A rock is an animal. Therefore, I am smarter than the average carrot!

Midna: . . .

Midna3452 (aka The Author): Guys, just get back to the disclaimer.

Midna: Hey, why do you have almost the same name as me?!

The Author: I'm the author. I can do whatever I want. Like, for instance, I can change your name to Midona if you keep up the attitude.

Midna: You wouldn't!

Midona (aka Midna): I hate you!

Midna3452: Yes, so anyways, Link, do the disclaimer.

Link: Uh . . . I got nothin'.

The Author: Okay, that works! I don't own nothin!

Link: I . . .I got it right?! This is the happiest day of my life! (runs over and gives Midna (oops, sorry, Midona) a hug)

Midona: Get off me dog boy! And change my name back!

The Author: Now on with the story!

Eeeeew! Bugs!

Link lands on the ground and Midna, in her solid form, lands on his back.

Link: Ow . . . I think I broke something . . .

Midna: Like what?

Link: Like . . . everything . . .

Midna: Oops. Well, I'll be more careful next time.

Link: (jumps up and turns his head to look at Midna) NEXT TIME?!

Midna: Yeah. You didn't think this was the only Twilight you were going to see, did you? Eee-hee! Now get going!

Link: Ugh, again with the commands . . .

Midna: MOVE!

They run until they come to a glade surrounded by trees. Just then, three black monsters fall from the sky.

Midna: Not these guys again! Well, I'm sure you can handle them all by yourself, right? So, I'll see you later! (flees Link's back and disappears)

Link: Wait! Midna! Ugh, stupid little girl . . .

Midna: (says from out of nowhere) I'M NOT A LITTLE GIRL!

Link looks around frantically to see where her voice is coming from, but he realizes that he is surrounded by the black monsters.

Link: Eh heh heh . . . hey Fred. Long time no see, eh?

Fred: Okay fluffy, I'm in a bad mood since I checked the Starbucks and they said they have no more mocha frappuchinos, so I'll just have to settle for a caramel one. Now hold still while I rip your head off!

Link: WAIT! Uh . . . did you do something to your hair?

Fred: Why, yes I did! (slicks his hair or whatever is on his head back) Do you like it?

Link: Yeah, it really suits you!

Other Black Monster Number 1: Well, I think it's hideous.

Other Black Monster Number 2: I'm going with Cherry on this one.

Fred: Well who asked you anyways?!

Cherry: No one. I just thought I'd give you some constructive criticism.

Fred: Constructive criticism my ass! You're just jealous!

Cherry: Oh, please! Why would I be jealous of you, Mr. I-secretly-paint-my-nails-but-I-paint-them-black-so-no-one-knows-that-I-secretly-paint-my-nails?!

Fred: -gasp- How did you know?! You stalker!

OBMN2: Now now, there's no need for name calling.

Cherry: Shut up, Bob!

Bob: -gasp- How dare you call me by my own name?! (slaps Cherry across the face)

Cherry: (slaps him back)

Fred: Ooh, catfight!

The three monsters fight until they eventually kill eachother in some horrible way that the author is to lazy to write about. They fall over and are sucked back into the portal. Link starts walking but stops to growl at Midna when she lands on his back again. They continue on until they get to another spring.

Voice From The Spring: Beast . . . come closer . . .

Link: (walks closer to the voice)

VFTS: Closer . . .

Link: (walks closer until he steps into a particularly deep part of the spring and falls over, soaking himself and Midna)

VFTS: Bwahahahaha! That was hilarious! You just made my day! So anyways, there are some tears of light that I need you to pick up for me. Carry them in this. (somehow gives Link the Vessel of Light) Well, I gots to go! Toodles!

Link: Wait! What the heck am I supposed to be looking for?! Ugh, stupid voices coming out of nowhere . . .

Midna: You know, you really shouldn't say that kind of stuff around other people . . .

Link: Ah! Midna, where did you come from?!

Midna: I've been sitting on your back for the past ten lines, you idiot!

Link: Well, you never said anything, so I thought you had left!

Midna: (sighs exasperatedly) Whatever, Link. Just go find those tears.

Link and Midna run through the tunnel leading to the place where the plant that ate Link's shoe once stood. They stop when they see a spark run across the ground.

Link: Whoa, what the heck is that?!

Midna: Use your sense view to check it out.

Link: Hey, how do you always know what I'm supposed to do?

Midna: I'm your fairy helper for this game. Except I'm not a fairy. I'm not really an imp either, but that's another story . . .

Link: You're not an imp? Then what the heck is on my back?!

Midna: Just forget I said anything!

Link: Fine then. (turns on his sense view) Hey, a bug!

Midna: Eeeeeeew! I hate bugs! They're so gross!

Link: Not this little guy! Look how cute he is! Who's a cute little bug? You are! You are! Who- AW FREAK! HE BIT MY NOSE! Bad bug!

Midna: Just kill it already!

Link: (eats the bug) Mmm . . . tastes like cucco!

Midna makes a disgusted face and tries not to throw up. When she is ready, they continue on until they come to the place where the plant was. However, instead of a plant there is a locked gate in its place. Link watches as he sees another spark go under the gate. Link gets ready to dig under the gate.

Midna: Wait! Don't you think you should check around that hut to see if there's a key?

Link: I can't use a key as a wolf, but I'll go over there to see if that guy's hair is okay.

Midna: His hair?

Link: Yeah, I set it on fire a while ago.

Midna: . . . I don't want to know.

Link and Midna run over to Coro's hut. Midna helps Link jump inside and they see Coro standing on a table. He is completely bald.

Coro: Where are all these bugs coming from?! Oh well, at least that guy hasn't come back . . . when he does, I'm gonna kill him!

Link: Um, Midna? Maybe we should just leave . . .

Midna: He can't hear you, stupid!

Coro: Hey, who just said that?

Link: You were saying?

Coro: Can I take my coffee break now? I've been standing on this table for five hours straight waiting for you two to come and get these damn bugs!

Midna: Shut up! You're going to ruin the whole physics of this game!

Coro: Since when did this game have anything to do with physics? Whatever that is . . .

Link: And why do you keep calling this a game?

Midna: Uh, well . . . this whole adventure just feels like a game so far, doesn't it? Heh heh . . .

Link: (looks at Midna suspiciously but then lets it go)

The Author: (voice comes out of nowhere) Nice save, Midna.

Midna: Thanks!

Link: (looks around frantically to find the voice)

TA: And remember, Link must never know . . .

Link: I must never know what?

Midna: Uh, nothing.

Link: Great, more random voices coming from nowhere. I swear, as soon as I get my body back, I'm going to go see a therapist.

Midna: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Hurry up and collect those tears!

Link collects the tears in and around Coro's house, and then goes over to the gate. He digs under it and kills a few more Twilight Parasites before going into another tunnel. He comes out of the tunnel and sees a purple fog hanging over the pit that he was in before. He jumps into it and Midna gets off his back and shakes her head as he falls down into the mist.

Midna: (floats back over to the land) Oh well, I guess I'll just have to find another stupid dog to help me . . .

Link randomly appears out of nowhere.

Midna: (whirls around) Whoa, where the heck did you come from?!

Link: I . . . I really don't know . . .

Midna: Okay . . . well anyways, let's go find the rest of those tears! I can help you jump across this pit.

Link kills a few more Parasites before being practically dragged across the pit by Midna. He screams as she pulls him from one tree branch to another, and he is so scared he doesn't even realize that they're already back on solid ground.

Midna: Link, you can stop screaming now!

Link: AHHH- oh, we're already across. That wasn't so hard!

Midna rolls her eyes and Link eats some more bugs and they head through another gate. They come out of yet another tunnel and all of a sudden another portal opens. A tour bus full of Twilight Messengers lands on the ground next to Link.

Twilight Messenger Tour Guide: And folks, if you look to your left, you'll see a real light-dwelling wolf!

Twilight Messenger Tourists: Ooh . . . ahh . . .

TMTG: Who wants to see it get run over?!

TMT: YEAH!

Link: AHHHHH!

The bus starts coming towards Link very fast. He just manages to jump out of the way before the bus crashes into a rock wall and everyone on it dies and gets sucked back into the portal.

Link: (lying on the ground with his paws over his head and whimpering) Are they gone?

Midna: Yes, Link, you've managed to kill even more creatures from the Twilight.

Link: Why are you so defensive about the twilight monsters?!

Midna: They're not monsters! They're just misunderstood! And I, um . . . I don't think its right to kill other creatures!

Link: Ha! You would kill me if you didn't need me to help you!

Midna: True, true.

Link: (looks at Midna nervously) You, uh, you weren't supposed to actually agree with me . . .

Midna: Would you rather I lie to you?

Link: (keeps staring at Midna nervously) Eh heh heh, let's just go get those tears, shall we?

They run up the path to the Forest Temple and manage to collect all the tears of light. They are immediately whisked back to the spring and the Light has returned to the area.

VFTS: (appears as a deformed monkey) I am the Spirit of Light, Faron!

Link: Hooray for you.

Faron: Look at your awakened form!

Link: (looks at himself and notices that he has on a new outfit) Aw sweet!

Faron: The tunic that you wear once belonged to the Hero Chosen by the Gods.

Link: Did he wash this thing before he died?

Faron: Um, actually, me and the other Spirits of Light sort of dug up his grave to get this thing . . . he was still wearing it when we dug him out . . . we forgot to take it to the dry cleaners. Sorry!

Link: Eh, whatever. At least it goes with my eyes!

Faron: . . . Just go to the Forest Temple, alright? (disappears)

Link: Wait! Aren't you supposed to tell me why I have to go there?!

Faron: No, you're too much of a weirdo!

Link: Psh, whatever!

Midna: (pops out of Link's shadow) Hey, nice duds!

Link: Thanks! I really think they flatter my figure.

Midna: . . .

Link: You know, my sexy, hunkalicious body?

Midna: . . . no comment . . . at all . . .

Link: You just don't understand!

Midna: No. No I don't. So, what are you going to do now, Mr. Important Hero? Eee-hee!

Link: I'm going to go to the Forest Temple because the big, bright, deformed monkey told me to.

Midna: Alrighty then, have fun with that. I'll just tag along. Well, see you later! (goes into Link's shadow)

Link: Bye!

Link runs towards the Forest Temple singing "I'm too sexy for my tunic, too sexy for my tunic, so sexy . . ."

A/N: You know the drill . . .

Midona: See the button right there? Just press it and review! Then all your wildest dreams will come true!

Link: Really?! I'm going to go press the button now! (runs over to a red button)

Midona: WAIT! DON'T PRESS THAT! IT'S THE SELF-DESTRUCT BU-!

Link presses the button and the room explodes . . . To be continued!

Oh yeah, and about the Midona thing . . . I'm pretty sure that's how her name is supposed to be translated in Japanese, but i could be wrong . . . anyways, review please!