Phase Three – The Lies

I heard her giggle and I bet she might of thought that I was blushing, if I was still a human I probably was. I continued to stare out the rear window, still hearing that soft melodious giggle of hers. I wanted to join in, but I've found nothing funny about me being embarrassed. I wondered why she was looking at me. I wondered when she had stopped humming, since I didn't know when she did, especially when I was thinking about the past. The painful, sweetest past with Edward and her. They were the two most important people in my life, losing either one of them would kill me. But I have to admit, losing Alice would tear me apart.

"What are you thinking?" I heard she asked the question in a low and soft murmur. I had to close my eyes and released a sigh that I knew she would hear. Oh how much I wanted to tell her what was on my mind then. How much I wanted to confess to her, but I'm a coward and always will be. I opened my eyes and turned to face her, and that same honey golden eyes looked straight back at me.

"Nothing." I lied, and since I was a horrible liar Alice didn't believe me. Her brows furrowed only a little, and even so I still found her beautiful.

"Bella, tell the truth." She urged, and I couldn't help but comply, only a little.

"Alright, I was thinking about how I met Edward, and the family." There, at least that was half the truth, she couldn't possibly want more. Alice seemed to buy it, and nodded as she listened to me. Her eyes weren't on the road, not like they should be anyway. A vampire didn't need to look at the road to and go 'Oops, I think I crash into someone and kill them', because we're very careful, just not the speed.

"You miss him, don't you?" She asked, her voice was low and I thought I heard a tint of pain in there, or maybe it was just my imagination. I tend to imagine things that I want to hear, so this was totally acceptable.

"Yes, I do." Another lie, I didn't miss him, I miss her, even though she was sitting right beside me. I answered her after I had turned my face away from her, so that I could look at the road ahead. I hate lying to Alice while looking into her eyes. It sucked to have to hide these feelings from her, and sometimes I just wish that she could be Jasper, but then that would make it the more awkward for us. I heard her sigh, but I didn't dare to look at her again, afraid that my eyes would give my lie away.

"I miss Jasper too." I felt a pang of guilt and pain in my chest, and I bit down on my bottom lip rather hard to control the sob. I knew that she was missing Jasper, but hearing about it was too much to bear. I love Jasper, of course, as a brother. He had been there for me when I needed him, just like a brother would be when a sister needs him. Alice was the same, but she had been there for me when I needed Edward, and Edward didn't even give me that much.

"They'll come back, soon." There was no hint of hope in my tone, not even one tiny hint. But I forced a sigh to escape my lips, a sigh of longing, and I heard her sigh too, but it wasn't of longing and I wondered what it was.

"Let's just shop to distract us, like Esme and Rosalie are doing right now." She suggested and I could hear her tone getting brighter. I knew that she would be trying to distract herself from missing Jasper, but shopping won't distract me from missing her, nothing ever will.

"I don't think that will distract me." I blurted out, but my voice was barely a whisper but knowing Alice's intense hearing, she would have heard me. I was right, I felt a pair of concerning eyes piercing into me, and I knew that it was her. So I turned to look at her, seeing the concern visibly in her eyes, and had to bite down on my lip again. It looked like I've been doing this a lot today.

"Do you miss Edward that much?" No, Alice, to tell the truth, I don't miss him at all. Now why couldn't I just say that? Maybe because he was her brother. Maybe because it wouldn't be fair for me to say it. Maybe because I wanted to say that I miss her instead of him.

"Yea, I guess so." Another fantastic lie and this time she bought it. Seriously, I was beginning to feel like I've committed a crime that no matter how long I'd be sentenced for it, I wouldn't be forgiven.

"You two have been together for two years." Yes, and it was too long. Two years was too long for me to be together with him, and it was too short for me to be with her, even if it was as a best friend and now sister-in-law.

"Yea, I know, and I still miss him." Like me missing getting homework. That was harsh, I guess, since he was my husband after all. I've been telling a lot of lies right now, and I just wanted to stop, and I hoped that she would just stop asking questions about him since I know I would lie again. I then closed my eyes, sighed, and decided that I wanted to stock up on my shoes. My decision was clear, and I opened my eyes and turned to her to see her grinning at me, from ear to ear. I knew that she was seeing the vision now, since her honey eyes became distant and at that moment I leaned into her. Unfortunately and fortunately for me, her eyes refocused and I pulled back as soon as possible.

"We're going to get you heels, more heels, and flats !" She squealed and her hands immediately left the steering wheel and she clapped her hands excitedly. I groaned and slumped down in my seat. I didn't want heels, nor do I want flats, I just want comfortable shoes such as tennis shoes or boots.

"Alice…" I groaned, and I saw her hands flew back to grasp the steering wheel. She giggled again and I felt her hand on my head, ruffling my hair gently, and all too quickly since she withdrew her hand.

"Silly, it's not like you're going to fall. Besides, you won't even feel a thing." True, I've been in her pair of high heels before. Her feet were smaller than mine, but I didn't feel a thing and I didn't even trip or fall, that was at least the small highlight of my day.

"But Alice…" I whined and her giggle turned into a laugh. Even though I was whining, I could feel the corner of my lips curl up a little into a smile. I love to hear the sound of her laughter. That, angelic laugh of hers, I just couldn't get enough. I couldn't remember how long she had been laughing, but I forgot the time since I was drowning into her perfect, melodious, angelic, sweetest voice. Then she stopped, and her eyes became distant again. This time, she didn't smile, her face was serious, focus and I wondered what she was seeing. I wanted to know what she was seeing. I desperately wanted to know since I saw something beginning to form in her eyes, and then it hit me. Alice was trying hard not to sob at what she was seeing, and since we could not shed a tear, the unshed tears settled in her eyes and I so wanted to comfort her then, but I waited for her, impatiently while she recovered from her vision, little by little.