Alright, so... I'm kind of please. I mean, there's actual plot. And drama. And I do so love my plot and drama. And I'm gonna make this quick cuz it's two thirty in the morning and Wrath is a tired Wrath. Love you all, review.
Don't own. Want. Will get... somehow.
Ki11 me, Ki55 me
"You've been watching?!"
Ryuk cackled, shadowing his human. "You mortals are so entertaining. The detective who would put you behind bars even though he loves you, and the mass-murderer who planned his eventual death. It's so interesting!"
What's this "planned" crap?
Light felt his lip curl to a sneer as he snapped, "You're a closet pervert, aren't you! How could you watch all that and call it 'interesting'?! And how could you give me back my memories at that moment?!"
The shinigami shrugged. "Entertainment is addicting. And that moment made for some pretty interesting stuff."
The brunette rolled his eyes, walking to Misa's room. While he was out here, he may as well actually get those damn pictures. "That's completely sick."
"But you did want to be reminded anyway. Wouldn't it be better to remember while L has an interest in you, instead of waiting? He could lose interest, or you could. Seemed opportune anyway."
"Not while we're having sex!"
Ryuk grinned at Light's glare and flush. "Plus it's fun to watch you squirm with anxiety, Light. Just saying. You're an intriguing human."
Was that supposed to complement him? Or make up for the voyeurism?
His eyes narrowed as he stepped on the elevator to Misa's room. "You sound like him when you say it like that, you realize."
The shinigami attached himself to the ceiling, looking down at the young man. "Bet that would make for a better "climax", wouldn't it?" He laughed, twisting. "You wanna think of that every time you have sex with him now?"
Light's teeth gritted as he hissed, "Oh, shut up, I never want to hear you talk about L and me, got it?"
"Told you before, Light, I'm not on your side."
"I don't care if you're not on my side, stop being a lecherous pervert, really, at least try to live up to being a death god!"
... It made perfect sense, just- Oh, never mind!
"Few other things to do in the shinigami world, Light."
Ewww. Ew.
The brunette's eyes widened as the elevator door opened. "Are you serious? This is what you do in your spare time??"
"Nothing funnier than the faces humans make mid-intercourse."
The human's eyes narrowed, his lips pursing. "Sex is a joke in the shinigami world." He walked down the hall.
"Almost as funny as genocide, yeah."
Light ignored him, knocking on Misa's door. "Misa?" He blinked as a loud THUD floated from inside, followed by rapid footsteps before the door was yanked open.
"Light-kun!" The blonde stood in the doorway in nothing but a backless black Lolita apron and white bloomers. "Misa-Misa knew Light-kun would forget being gay and come back, and Misa-Misa is prepared too!"
Light jumped back, covering his eyes quickly. "No! First of all, I'm not gay, second of all, put some damn clothes on, Misa!"
Yep, he was gay. Definitely gay.
Misa's smile fell, blue eyes clouding with disappointment. "But then..." Her cotton candy pink lips scrunched to a pout as she crossed her arms. "Why else would Light-kun see Misa-Misa?" Before the brunette could answer, she perked, smiling again. "Ooh, maybe it's to get copies of the BL pictures of him and L?"
Light's eyes narrowed. "No. In fact, what I came here to talk to you about was taking those down."
"What?! But whyyy!" The model's eyes filled with tears as her shoulders fell in defeat. "Light-kun and Ryuzaki-san already have fifty subscribers on the Internet, and the site has only been up for a half hour!"
Fifty people were watching him have sex?!
"What?! My God, what is wrong with the world!" He walked past the young woman quickly, going directly to the laptop set up on the coffee table.
All fifty of these people were going to meet very sudden and unfortunate ends.
Misa followed at his heels like an overly cute lace-covered puppy. "Don't worry, Light-kun! They can't download the pictures, they must order them! The ones posted on the website are just samples!"
The brunette's lips pursed as he searched the picture history.
....
His eyes widened.
...
He covered his mouth with his hand to hide his blush.
....
Oh my God, where did she get these, surveillance cameras??
"I suppose they could save the samples, but that would be cheating! Don't you think so, Light-kun?"
"Dear.... God." He shook his head, taking the pictures down as quickly as he could.
Misa's eyes widened as she grabbed Light's shoulders. "Ah! Light-kun, what are you doing!"
His patience with the world was really wearing thin.
"I am taking this site down, I told you I was. You shouldn't have put it up in the first place, it's a violation of my privacy."
The blonde's eyes widened as she pulled at Light's arm, near panicking. "Don't take Misa-Misa's internet!"
A voice like gravel floated from behind both of them, chuckling. "Could just tell her those pictures are stopping you from enjoying 'one on one time' with your detective sex-outlet, Light. That would shut her up."
He paused.
God, did it suck when telling the truth was his best option.
"... Ugh." Light's shoulders fell as he sighed, turning to glare at Ryuk before looking to the young model. "Misa, I don't think you understand how much these pictures are bothering me."
Misa perked, blinking with confusion. "Bothering... Light-kun?" She bowed her head, saying dejectedly, "If they bother Light-kun that much, then... Misa-Misa will stop the subscribers..."
"They really do. Misa, I can't even forget about them when I'm..." The brunette pursed his lips, continuing reluctantly, "With L."
Did he have to draw her a damn diagram?
The blonde blinked, staying quiet for a moment before she said, "But... wouldn't that help Light-kun, thinking of pictures?"
He twitched, lips pursing slightly. "... No, because I'm thinking about people looking at the pictures."
Misa stared at him blankly for a moment before her eyes bugged. "Oh- OH!"
Yeah. Oh.
"Light-kun, Misa-Misa is so sorry! Sorry, sorry, sorry!" The young woman pulled her laptop towards her, pulling up the half-dismantled website and continuing to delete the pictures. "Don't worry, Misa-Misa will send viruses to all the subscribers and mess up their computers so that the pictures don't spread, okay?"
Finally the woman was thinking with her head.
Light sighed, relaxing. "Thank you." He stood, bending down to brush his lips over the blonde's forehead before he straightened. "I'll see you later, Misa." With that he left.
The model blinked at the screen, staring blankly for a moment before she turned to look after him, her face dark red. She whimpered softly, cocking her head slightly like a puppy longing to follow her master after being told to stay. A second later, she went back to her computer, working even faster than before.
--
Ryuk cackled behind him, nearly falling from the air. "You have a habit of giving people fast hope, you know that! Either that or you're just naturally a bastard."
"It's a natural talent, I assure you." Light stepped back on the elevator. "Now go away."
He was going to have enough trouble trying to maintain that "poor overwhelmed virgin" facade, he didn't need to try to do it while an eldritch death god hung over him commenting on their activities like a perverted cheerleader.
...
Uggghhh, bad mental image, why was he burdened with having a superior mind with the ability to picture anything!?
Ryuk followed close behind him, a spring in his wings. "No way, Light, I'm seeing how a love tryst between a mass murderer and his passionate detective works out. S'better than soaps."
The young man glared, quieting his voice to a whisper as he passed by a point he knew contained security cameras. "There will be no 'love tryst' with you standing over us, there will be no 'love tryst' at all."
No 'love tryst', hell, no love period.
The gravelly voice quieted to mimic his own, floating from mere inches away. "And what are you gonna do about the fact that if L finds out you're Kira, he'll put you away without a second thought? Heh, though you're not exactly innocent, what with planning his death and all."
Light's eyes sharpened, glaring ahead as he hissed, "That's not a problem, is it, as he won't be finding out." He was nearly cut off in a gasp as Ryuk sped in front of him, putting them face to face with only inches between them.
"Only reason he hasn't found out so far is because you were so guarded about it. What're you gonna do now that you can't be guarded around him without seeming to lose interest?" A wide grin curled Ryuk's lips. "Either way, Light, it's bombed. Which is why I'm sticking around to see what you do."
He was so right...
The brunette's wide eyes seemed to be glued to the shinigami, no matter how much he wanted to back away. Eventually he managed to take a step back, his voice low and calm. "I'll think of something. Stay out of it." With that, he continued past the death god towards his joined room with L.
Ryuk turned to watch him go, his toothy smile splitting his face. "Don't worry, Light, I'm gone for now."
The young man paused, unable to stop the soft sigh that passed through his lips.
.... Dammit....
After a second, he opened the door and stepped inside, sliding it shut behind him. "Managed to get her to take it down, thank- " Light blinked as he looked up to see the detective half curled on his side in bed, sleeping peacefully. "...."
He felt himself smiling and he didn't know why.
The brunette shook his head, walking to the bed and laying down beside the warm, thin, deceptively human body he now remembered as his perfect enemy. After a moment, he buried his face in the pillow, his whisper inaudible through the barrier it provided.
"... what am I supposed to do..."
An arm draped over him and he jumped, but as he looked up, he saw L was still asleep, even as he shifted closer to him, pressing flush.
If he suddenly pulled away from L emotionally, it would be obvious something had happened, and if L thought he had changed, he might start rethinking Light's Kira-percentage. If he tried to remain open and relaxed around L, he would see something had changed in Light's fundamental personality. After all, since his memories returned, he had been less...
The detective sighed softly, breath brushing over Light's neck, his forehead resting on the younger man's slender shoulder.
...
The brunette leaned into the touch, closing his eyes again.
The older man stirred at the contact, opening his eyes, looking Light up and down. After a moment, he raised his hand, running his fingers through the silky russet hair, his voice soft. "Did you make Misa-chan take down the pictures?"
Light nodded, opening his eyes and fighting down a yawn.
He was suddenly so tired...
"I convinced her." His eyes narrowed as his cheeks flushing faint pink. "I had to tell her why though."
"You told her that you lost your erection?"
"... Not in so many words."
"Does she have pictures left over?"
".... Probably, yes. Why exactly would you need with pictures of me and you, it's not like you lack for visuals."
"I would like some. For when Light-kun is at home."
He facepalmed, rolling his eyes.
... Really? Was he really surprised?
"... So she does have more?"
The brunette pursed his lips, settling into the mattress, grumbling, "I have no idea, probably."
The detective leaned forward, pressing his lips against Light's forehead before he pushed himself up, standing. "Then I will be back."
"Ugh." Light shook his head, pushing up and sighing as L left. He followed suit, standing and stretching as he watched the door and listened to L's footsteps pad softly down the hall.
"Thought you'd take advantage of my absence and screw him again." Ryuk cackled as he stuck to the ceiling above the bed like a spider.
Light twitched, his entire body tensing. "What exactly are you doing?" His Death Note dropped at his feet and for a moment, there was the unmistakable urge to take a step back.
"Forgot to leave this with you."
The brunette knelt, picking the notebook up.
His notebook.
He straightened, looking the book up and down as if he expected to find a drastic change in its appearance. "I can't keep this in here, he'll find it. I don't suppose I can ask you to hold it, can I?"
The shinigami shook his head, letting himself drift to the ground on black wings. "You know the rules, Light, you own that note. Why don't you just hide it or something?"
Light's lips twitched to a grimace, but he nodded. "Right, right. Where am I supposed to..." The brunette cast his eyes around the room, muttering to himself, "I don't have long before he gets back, I just need to find somewhere temporary, what won't he need in the next twenty-four hours..." The brunette sighed, walking to the closet, opening it and kneeling. He lay the book down neatly on the floor, tearing a page out before sliding the thin book behind a rack of shoes.
God knew L didn't plan to leave the bedroom for the next twenty-four hours, let alone go anywhere that would involve shoes. It wasn't a perfect plan, but what was he supposed to do with minutes left to hide his greatest weapon.
"That'll do for now." The young man stood, picking up the spare sheet of blank paper with him.
Ryuk cocked his head. "What are you gonna do with the torn page?"
Light looked down at it, flipping it over in his fingers before folding it neatly and sliding it into the inner pocket of his jacket, managing to push it through a hole in the lining inside. "Just in case."
The death god grinned widely. "Once a murderer, always a murderer, eh, Light?"
He narrowed his eyes, turning to look Ryuk in the eye for the first time since he phased in. "I'm not abandoning his destiny."
And he wasn't.
"Sure, Light. Whatever you say." The door opened.
... He wasn't.