Disclaimer: I don't own anything in the Who-verse. That honour belongs to RTD and the mighty and glorious BBC. The only thing I get out of this is a warm fuzzy feeling knowing I have put right what once was wrong.
Author's Note: So here we are the final chapter. Please forgive the extended A/N but I have a couple of things I need to say...
Firstly, major thank you's and hugs to everyone who's read, alerted, and favourited (not a real word but hey who cares) the story with special mentions to Marzi, MizScarlet, Ravenja70, Helen Pattskyn, Orion Lyonesse, DarqueQueen7, Monica Ann, bbmcowgirl, tempestuous rayne, Gwento-addict, Roslin, JantoForever21; DeltaCandy, TweetyCanary, LiquidLash and lysmachine for taking the time to review (often repeatedly). I really can't tell you how much it means to me.
Secondly. I tried to write a bit of smut, I felt you all deserved it, but I'm rubbish at it, so I'll point you in the right direction and let your imaginations do the rest ;o)
Thirdly. The closing lyrics are from Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol possibly one of the finest love songs around. I know it's twee. I couldn't help it and I'm not apologising for it.
Fourthly. Enjoy!
Chapter XXIII
It was a crisp December morning, a stiff frost caked the Roald Dahl Plas, but a hundred feet below the paving slabs Jack was oblivious. Standing in the medical bay, Ianto's body lay on the slab beside him looking exactly the same as he had on that fateful day in Thames House twenty two years ago. Jack fought the sick nervous feeling that was churning his stomach. This would work. It had to work. The Doctor had said so. But what would he do if he was wrong. It would be like losing Ianto all over again. He couldn't take that, not after waiting so long. He didn't have the strength.
"Dad?" The auburn haired woman by his side squeezed his hand comfortingly. "I'm right about this. I'm sure I am. It might just take a few minutes to take effect."
"I know." Jack returned the squeeze. "I'm just nervous. What if he doesn't want me any more. I wouldn't blame him. I got him killed. Well, as good as."
"Jack Harkness, you're an imbecile." This scathing interjection came from Gwen, now in her fifties, but with the same burning passion and determination she'd had in her thirties. Stood opposite Jack and Siân on the other side of the slab, her eyes anxiously darted between Jack and the monitors which would evidence Ianto's return to life.
"So you keep telling me," Jack retorted genially. "It's one of the reasons you lo..."
There was a sharp beep cutting through Jack's words like a siren. As one Jack, Gwen and Siân drew a breath and held it waiting...waiting. A second bleep. A third. A spike in the brain wave trace. Jack breathed out raggedly. It was working. Gwen grinned in relief and winked at Siân.
"I think we'd better leave these two alone now. I've walked in on one of their 'Thank God we're alive' sessions before. Not pretty!"
Siân giggled, suddenly looking like a vaguely embarrassed twenty year old rather than a world renowned, eminent scientist. Giving her Dad a quick peck on the cheek "For Luck" she started to follow Gwen out of the room.
"Siân, sweetheart!" Jack called after her, halting her as she was about to pull the door closed behind her. "Thank you."
Siân grinned, a look so like Donna. "Any time, Dad!" Jack watched smiling as the door swung shut behind her with a resounding thunk.
"I leave you alone for five minutes and you've already got another woman on the go. How do you do it?"
The soft croaky voice abruptly stopped Jack in his tracks. Swinging his eyes down he saw Ianto's dark blue eyes softly staring at him, slightly crinkled in the corners with amusement.
"Oh God, Yan." In a single motion Jack had pulled Ianto up into his arms and was kissing him feverishly on his cheeks and forehead whilst he sobbed unashamedly.
"I love you" he whispered into his lover's mouth.
Despite his confusion and the killer headache pounding at his temples Ianto's heart leapt, he wrapped his arms around Jack and hugged him as if he would never let go.
"I'm alright Jack, I'm OK," he soothed, not knowing why Jack appeared so distraught, but filled with the overwhelming need to ease his pain. He cradled Jack's shaking frame, until the older man's sobs subsided and the frantic kisses slowed and deepened. Suddenly the memories of the 456 came flooding back. The virus, his lungs filling with fluid. Jack begging him not to leave him. Dying in Jack's arms, the only place he'd ever really wanted to be.
"I died. I remember," he muttered, pulling back from Jack but staying safe in the circle of Jack's arms. His voice became panicked.
"Please don't tell me you found one of those god-awful glove things. I don't want to be like Owen..."
"You're not like Owen, you're 100% alive and here." Jack kissed him again. "And functional in every respect."
"Well that's fortunate sir," he deadpanned. "Otherwise you would have had to extend the current limits of your creativity."
Jack laughed, a joyous sound which warmed Ianto's heart. Everything was going to be alright. He had waited for Jack, and Jack had come for him. In that instance he remembered everything.
"I told you I was waiting, Jack." Ianto tilted his head so he could look into Jack's beaming face. "That day in my flat. Till the end of time if I had to. Of course I thought I was waiting for you to come to me, not the other way round."
Jack blinked, his brow furrowed in confusion and then as Ianto's words penetrated his brain he stared at him open-mouthed in shock.
"That was real? Your flat? Us having that bloody awful row? How is that even possible? There was no brain activity. I checked when we first brought you here. Repeatedly!." For once Jack seemed at a complete loss. Ianto rather liked the look of total bemusement on Jack's face. It was so childlike, and decidedly cute, Ianto decided. He'd have to tell him sometime. First though, he better put him out of his misery
"The Doctor said..." he began, quite enjoying having the upper hand in the knowledge stakes for once.
"Wait. The Doctor? Where the hell did you see him?"
"Where do you think Jack?" Ianto said in an slightly exasperated tone. Sometimes his beloved Captain could be so...thick. He looked a little reprovingly at him. "In my flat. A little while after you showed up. Do you want to know what he said or not?"
Jack nodded.
"You might want to sit down for this. It might take a while." Ianto suggested. For a moment Jack's look of consternation was replaced by a sly grin.
"I thought you'd never ask." In one swift movement he managed to jump up onto the trolley beside Ianto and pull him from his semi-reclined position onto Jack's lap to be supported against Jack's chest. Ianto blushed, much to Jack's amusement.
"I'm not a child Jack!" he protested half-heartedly, secretly rather enjoying the closeness.
"Humour me!" Jack scolded him affectionately, giving him a far from paternal squeeze and grinding his hips suggestively into Ianto's backside. Ianto gave a tiny squeak, making Jack raise his eyebrows. Ianto coloured an even deeper shade of pink.
"I'm out of practice," he said defensively. "I have been dead a while."
"Get on with the story, Jones." Jack replied with a chuckle. He rested his head against Ianto's and closed his eyes contentedly. Ianto took a deep contented breath of his own and began.
"Yes, sir! You may or may not know, Captain Harkness, that there is a part of the brain which humans don't use. Scientists don't even know it exists in this time. It's the part of brain responsible for telepathy." Ianto could sense rather than see Jack's expression of incredulity and he laughed, twisting round in his arms to give him an affectionate peck on the cheek. "The Doctor said you wouldn't believe me. Keep an open mind Jack. I won't deny I took some convincing." He turned back and settled back into Jack's embrace trying to ignore Jack's right hand which by now was resting on his bare thigh under the sheet which had been covering him, the thumb moving in lazy circles, the sensations creating a well of growing desire in the pit of his stomach. He got the feeling he better keep the story short and to the point for both their sakes.
"When people are in a highly charged emotional state they can unconsciously access this area of the brain and use a primitive form of telepathy. It's the gut feeling you get when someone you are very close to is in danger even though they may be miles away." He felt Jack's grip tighten and knew that each had had that feeling about the other in the past.
"When I believed I was dying it seems my consciousness tried to access that area of my brain and couldn't – a side effect of the virus. Somehow it lodged in equivalent part of your brain instead. The Doctor doesn't really know exactly how it happened but he guessed it was something to do with us being intensely emotionally connected at the critical moment, your 51st century brain being more developed in that area than the average human, and your inability to die. If you hadn't been there I wouldn't be talking to you now. My body would have survived but what made me who I am would have been lost for ever. You saved my soul as well as my body, Jack." He lifted Jack's arm, the one encircled round his waist, and raising his left hand to his lips, kissed the wedding ring lodged there. He felt Jack shudder reflexively and let the hand return to his waist, covering it with his own. "The irony was you didn't know I was there and neither did I. But sometimes, when you were in a heightened emotional state, our minds touched. I told you once I would always be in your heart, apparently I was half a metre too low." Ianto looked round and took in Jack's continued shell-shocked expression. At the time he too had thought that the first moment Jack's mind and his had touched had been nothing but a dream. Dancing in his darkened flat to their old song. Giving Jack his blessing to move on. But however shocked Jack was about the explanation so far, Ianto knew it was a fair bet that what he had to say next would truly knock him for six. "Yours wasn't the only mind I accessed Jack. I spoke to Donna." As he expected Jack's eyes flickered to look at him in a mixture of alarm and confusion.
"You spoke to Donna?" Jack repeated bemused. Then his expression cleared as he fitted the pieces into place. "When she was in the coma. Your consciousness and her consciousness connected via mine." He gave a short laugh. "So that was where she found out about your grandmother's name." Then his face fell, and a look of guilt settled on his features. "When she told you, who she was. That must have really hurt. I'm sorry you had to find out that way."
Ianto shook his head. "Don't be sorry Jack. I won't deny I felt hurt when she first told me her name, when I found out how soon after my death you'd got together. But I never wanted you to be unhappy Jack. I never wanted you to be alone. Donna made you happy. For that I will always be grateful to her."
"She is an exceptional woman," Jack agreed. "and without her I wouldn't have Siân, or you."
Now it was Ianto's turn to look confused.
"Long story," Jack confessed. "I'll tell you later. So then, what else did you and Donna discuss?"
Despite Jack's light-hearted tone Ianto could hear the wariness in his voice. He gave Jack a reassuring smile.
"Mostly we talked about you. How amazing you were. How lucky we were to be able to love you and have you love us back. To be honest Donna didn't really remember a great deal about her life, apart from you of course. She didn't even remember about the Doctor at first..."
Now he looked at Jack in genuine surprise as the older man turned ashen.
"She remembered? And the memories didn't hurt her?" Jack whispered.
"They seemed to shock her when she first remembered, but then no, she seemed fine. Mad but fine. She thought you and the Doctor had been playing her. Setting her up. Then she talked about ripples in ponds. She didn't talk a whole load of sense to be honest."
Jack laughed as his colour returned. "So that's what the Doctor did in her mind to bring her out of the coma. Sneaky sod. He let her access just enough of her memories so that she could work out the big picture, then he safely fastened then away again... But if he was in Donna's mind he must have sensed your consciousness too. He knew. He knew you were alive and you were conscious and he didn't tell me." Suddenly there was fury on Jack's face. "The bastard, why didn't he tell me?"
Ianto put a restraining hand on Jack's arm.
"Cariad..." At the endearment, Jack took a deep breath.
"He should have told me," he insisted, though his voice was calmer.
"And what would you have done if he had? You had a wife; you had a child. Would you have left them knowing that there might never be a way to bring me back? The Doctor told me that although he knew my body was alive from the very beginning he didn't know whether my mind was still intact. It was only when he sensed me in Donna's mind that he thought it might be possible to bring me back whole."
"He could have told me later, when I had to leave Donna." Jack refused to let his indignation go.
"If he'd told you before you had left Donna you would always wonder if you left her because it was what was best for her, or because you wanted me back. The guilt would have destroyed any chance we might have together. He was doing you a favour Jack. Both of us actually. Now we are both free, Cariad." He leaned over to kiss Jack softly.
Jack deepened the kiss, flicking his tongue between the younger man's open lips, until he shuddered and gave a little moan. Ianto pulled away panting slightly.
"I missed you," he sighed, resting his head on Jack's shoulder. "I thought about you every minute of every day. Wished you were there with me. That day you appeared I thought the waiting was finally over, but then you were gone. I said then I would wait forever and I would have, but if it hadn't been for the Doctor coming I think I might I gone insane Jack."
Jack stroked Ianto's hair. Finally everything was clear. At last he knew what the Doctor had been doing in the vault that day. He hadn't been lying when he said he'd been checking that Ianto's cryopreservation intact; but he had also deliberately pushed Jack into a sufficiently heightened emotional state so that he would be able to access Ianto's mind via Jack's and reassure him that everything was now in place for bringing him back to life. Bringing him back to Jack.
"He saved both of us. I just wish it hadn't taken so long to get to today," he admitted.
"It really didn't seem that long," Ianto lied. It had felt like an eternity. Without the any real concept of time passing each hour had felt like a day. Nothing had felt real, until the day Donna had careered into his mind. For a short period of his existence he had no longer been alone. From that moment he measured everything against that, until the Doctor had appeared and told him the truth of his existence. That he would be reunited with Jack but that it would take time and he didn't know how long that would be. For the first time since waking up he wondered just how long he had been away. Certainly longer than eight years. Siân had been six when Jack had visited him and Jack and Donna had been together two years when Siân was born. The Doctor had showed up what felt like a few days later but was probably longer. He did a few mental calculations. Ten years then. Ten years wasn't so bad, not so long he couldn't pick up his life, his relationships with Rhiannon, Mica and David. Although a ten-year absence would take some explaining, especially after the whole dead thing. His need to know became overwhelming.
"Tell me Jack, just how long was I dead?"
Jack took both of Ianto's hands in his own and look in the face, his blue eyes never wavering from Ianto's.
"Twenty two years."
Ianto heard a roaring sound in his ears as the darkness closed in and he fell back onto the trolley in a dead faint.
Jack's scent. Finally it was there on the pillow where he'd searched for it in vain for so long. He didn't want to open his eyes. To shatter the illusion that Jack was there and he was home at last. He knew that when he dared to look all he would see was the stark white walls of the flat and the empty pillow beside him. He lay there for a few minutes more, breathing in the warm musky fragrance, almost believing he could hear Jack's shallow breaths as he slept, feel his arm draped across his body. It was torture. Exquisite, but torture nonetheless. With one final breath to commit the dream to memory he pushed open his eyes. Purple silk obscured his vision. Beyond he could see muted grey walls, lush purple and grey suede drapes, subdued lighting emanating from a stone based bed-side lamp. Where the hell was he, he thought in confusion. Where was the flat? And then he heard it, a snuffle. A strangely childlike sound which made his heart leap. Slowly he turned his head to look at the pillow next to him. There was Jack, laid beside him, his face relaxed and peaceful in repose half obscured by the curve of the pillow, the strange and familiar snuffling noise escaping from between his lips. In that instance Ianto remembered that the head on the pillow was no illusion; the musky scent of his lover and the arm draped across his waist was real. He was home.
Ianto stared at Jack, unwilling to wake him and sighed in contentment watching him sleep. Twenty-two years, he thought incredulously. He'd been dead for twenty-two years. By rights he should be upset. It was a shock, he couldn't deny that. But strangely he didn't feel the least bit perturbed. He couldn't imagine the world outside now; it would be unrecognisable to him. And he would be an anachronism, a man out of his time, an object of curiosity to the establishment in the know. Just like Jack. The analogy made him smile. Both of them were out of their times now. Different. Wrong. It was perfect.
"What are you smiling about, Ianto Jones?" Jack's soft question broke through Ianto's reverie. His smile broadened.
"I'm just contemplating what life is going to be like now I'm a freak of nature."
"You're not a freak of nature," Jack replied hotly, indignant on Ianto's behalf. "You're just special."
Ianto rolled his eyes, "Aww that's so sweet. Is Jack going to save me from the nasty government men then?" His voice was syrupy and sing-song.
Jack laughed. "I'm being a prat, aren't I?"
"A bit," Ianto conceded, with a grin. "But I'm touched. Really."
"Sod off," Jack returned with an affectionate look. "Here I was about to ask you to marry me and all you can do is make fun of me." He was still smiling but his eyes had suddenly grown intense.
Ianto stilled.
"I meant it," Jack said softly. "What I said before. In your flat. I should have asked you a long time ago. Before all this. I was scared. I know that's no excuse but..."
Ianto pressed a soft kiss to Jack's lips stopping him dead.
"Of course I'll marry you, Cariad" he said as he pulled away. "Today if I could. Did you ever really doubt it?"
"Honestly?" Jack's eyes were shining but he hesitated, needing to tell Ianto the truth so they could put the past behind them once and for all. "I don't know. After all the games I played trying to make you believe it wasn't serious, when all the time I knew you were the one and I was just too scared to admit it. Leading you into danger, over and over again. I got you killed."
"No, Cariad. You didn't. I followed you there. I made the choice. I may not be as old as you Jack but I'm old enough to make my own choices in life. I chose to follow you into Thames House. I would have followed you into hell if I'd had to...Oh sorry, we've done that already. And I just want you to know. I'm not going to sit back and watch you run Torchwood from the sidelines. Husband or no husband. I want back on the team. I'm staying by your side until the day I draw my final breath for real."
"I think the new assertive Ianto Jones is going to take a bit of getting used to," Jack muttered, as Ianto tried to distract him by nibbling on his earlobe. "Or is it going to be Ianto Harkness?"
Ianto lifted his head. "I was thinking Ianto Harkness-Jones actually. I always wanted to be double-barrelled," he commented, turning his attention back to Jack's ear and neck.
Jack sighed again. He was suddenly finding it very difficult to concentrate.
"Harkness-Jones. I like that." He paused for a moment, audibly catching his breath as Ianto located a sensitive spot on his collar bone with his tongue. Ianto's definition of out of practice was clearly different to his, he thought in amusement. "Don't you want to know about how we saved you?" he managed to gasp, as Ianto buried his head beneath the covers to turn his attention to his chest and he became aware of fingers slowly skimming up his thighs.
"Later," came the muffled reply. "Tomorrow, maybe."
One Month Later....
It was the most perfect night. Soft lighting lit the corners of the room,, highlighting couples sat at tables watching the couple dancing in the centre of the room. Jack raised his head from Ianto's shoulder, idly watching the people as he slowly spun round. The song playing was old, by his definition at least. He'd asked for it specially, a reminder of that perfect day on the beach long ago, playing on the car radio, the music drifting out over the sand. The words, even then seeming to fit his feelings exactly. Now he could admit those feelings. It would forever be their song. Imprinted on their minds as their first dance as a married couple. Jack and Ianto Harkness-Jones. On his finger, both rings, Donna's and Ianto's; but now there was a matching ring on Ianto's finger. Just as when he had married Donna Jack had offered to remove the other ring, this time Donna's. But just as swiftly as Donna had done, Ianto had stayed his hand, saying that it was only fitting that it remain there. Even though Donna now had someone else. Jack still couldn't believe how that had happened. Not that Donna had found someone else, but rather who she had found. Around them, amongst the other couples who had now taken to the floor he saw the objects of his thoughts moving slowly by, the auburn and blond heads close together in a world of their own. As if sensing the scrutiny the blond head lifted and a knowing wink was sent in Jack's direction. With a scowl, Jack gently swung Ianto round so he was facing the other direction and could no longer see the smirk which he knew was directed at his back.
Another couple came into view, Siân dancing with her 'cousin' Ianto, holding each other in that slightly uncomfortable embrace that spoke of a new relationship, boundaries only recently crossed. Jack was happy that Siân seemed to have found someone who could appreciate her uniqueness. Ianto was a lovely young man, possessed of the quick wit and loyalty of his mother and the easy temper and fierce possessiveness of his father. It was too soon to say whether the relationship would go anywhere but he and Ianto had already discussed the ramifications of having Gwen as an in-law. Jack grinned at the mental image of Donna and Gwen going head to head as mothers of the bride and groom respectively; the fireworks could well put Gwen's own wedding to shame. Throw Grandma Sylvia, now a domineering battleaxe in her early eighties, in the mix and it may necessitate the calling out of UNIT just to get through the vows. Jack gave a throaty chuckle causing Ianto to lift his head, woken from his own daydreams (him and Jack on a private beach in the Bahamas about twenty hours from now).
"What's so funny?" he said softly, possessively tightening his hold around Jack's waist and neck.
"Sorry, just picturing the Harkness-Williams wedding. A bit random I know." Jack confessed with a guilty smile. Ianto followed his line of sight until he saw Siân and smiled, his own look of pride almost as intense as her father's. He had been initially stunned at the news that Jack's daughter had provided the means for his resurrection and that her cure would one day soon save the whole human race. But after meeting Siân he had soon come to see that finding the cure for the 456 virus was only going to be the first of the extraordinary young woman's achievements. Just the previous morning Jack had received a call from UNIT wanting Siân to adapt the virus so that it could be be used for enabling deep space exploration. He had no doubts that she would succeed. It seemed Siân would be responsible for changing the world they knew in more ways than one.
"She's a remarkable woman, Jack. She can handle anything anything Gwen or Donna can dish out," he said confidently.
"And Sylvia?" Jack commented with a grin.
"OK. I'll concede Sylvia might require a Harkness-Jones intervention," Ianto allowed with a returning grin. "Promise me you'll never let me get as bitter and twisted as her no matter how old I get."
Jack's face sobered, the way it always did whenever Ianto's mortality was mentioned. Ianto saw his expression and sighed. No matter what he said or what he did, the truth that one day Jack would have to leave him behind would always be a shadow hanging over their relationship, but Ianto had promised himself that he would never let it cloud even one day of their time together. He unwound his arms from around Jack so he could take his husband's face in his hands, then he looked deeply into his glorious blue eyes, inky in the subdued lights.
"I don't know how much time we've got Jack, but I do know I intend spending every minute of it with you."
"I'm glad to hear that," Jack replied slowly, his sombre expression clearing as he realised what Ianto was trying to do. It was replaced with a wicked grin as he wrapped his arms around Ianto drawing him closer still. "Because I've got twenty two years of being apart from you to catch up on and I'm not planning on hurrying."
As Jack nuzzled against Ianto's neck, pressing soft kisses behind his ear, he felt the younger man shiver in anticipation. Jack smiled. The day the Doctor had told him that Ianto could be revived he'd warned there would be side effects; that the cells reactivated by the vaccine aged at a slower rate than expected, the equivalent of twelve years for every year in suspended animation. By Jack's reckoning that gave him about two hundred and sixty years to prove to his husband that he would never ever just be a blip in time.
Jack lifted his head and whispered for Ianto's ears alone.
"How about we head off now? No one will miss us. I really think it's about time we started that catching up." He lowered one hand to caress Ianto's backside.
"Jack, it's our wedding. The first dance isn't even over. Of course they are going to notice if we just walk out!" Ianto was trying to sound severe, trying to be sensible; but Jack could hear the longing in his voice.
Jack stopped dancing and pulled away, he captured Ianto's eyes with his own, his expression intense with barely contained passion. Ianto gave an imperceptible nod.
"Do you know how much I love you?" Jack whispered.
"Yes." One word, full of certainty, filled with longing. It was enough.
Jack, entwining Ianto's fingers between his own, led him from the dance floor towards the open door. Loving eyes followed their departure; Siân, Gwen, Donna and John, but no one made a move to stop them or even commented as they left the soft strains of the music behind them and vanished into the night.
We'll do it all
Everything
On our own
We don't need
Anything
Or anyone
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life
Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads
I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life
All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see
I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
The End
I hope you enjoyed the resolution. Reviews will make me very happy!
Oh, and in this final chapter Donna does have her memories back and yes, John is John Hart. But that is quite another story...