darthvader17: oh my! The reviews just make me feel so joyous. Well, I really did not expect that at least, a few people would like my story coz I know I'm such a sucker at this but hey! Really guys, thanks a lot. These guys who leave good reviews just make my day. Hahahah! (It's true and I'm not joking).. well anyway, I'm going to work now so as to finish this story coz I'm working on another ouran fan fic. Thanks for reviewing everyone! =)

whew! I am so glad that the computer problem is solved at last!!! Yippee!! Still, I can't easily access our PC here since my cousins also use the computer and they surf and play like there's no tomorrow. Hahaha.. anyway, I'm trying my best to update as soon as I can. Thanks everyone! I really appreciate your reviews.

Here is chapter 17… my story has not ended yet, you know..so, please review everyone! =)

summary: the devastated Haruhi, well, was really torn out during the previous chapter where she saw Tamaki and Kanoya hugging each other. It seems that Tamaki's wish finally came true, that Kanoya will someday say yes to him. Is this the end of Haruhi?

Chapter 17 – truth and keepsakes

"Enjoy the night everyone!"

Having found the excuse to go to the CR, Haruhi went outside immediately since it was all enough for her. She didn't feel like enjoying her worst prom ever.

She wanted so much to cry, but her ready-to-go-down tears seemed to have been stocked up. She covered her face with both of her hands.

I believed that enough distractions and distance will help me move on. I though it would make me stronger. I've been telling myself for months that I would be okay yet, here I am, crying over this guy.

Haruhi sobbed. She needed someone to cry on and indulge to her sadness. Suddenly, she heard approaching footsteps. Having heard it, she wiped her tears as fast as she could then she covered her face from view by looking from inside her bag.

"Oh, hi Haruhi."

The girl who just entered was Renge, her other classmate. Apparently, Renge did not notice Haruhi's state.

"Some night huh?" Renge said as she fixed her hair in front of the mirror.

Haruhi exhaled deeply as she pretended to rummage something in her bag, still hiding her face form view. "Some night indeed."

Renge finally bade goodbye to Haruhi. The students were already allowed to go home if they don't want to participate in the last part of their prom which was the disco.

Haruhi decided to follow after Renge so as not to let her friends worry that much about her since they were the only ones who knew about her devastated state. They were also planning to spend the night at Sakura's.

As she was walking outside the CR, Haruhi remembered her handkerchief being lost a while ago so she went to look for it in her bag when suddenly, she bumped onto someone.

The last person she would want to bump onto.

Tamaki looked at Haruhi, as she was looking at him.

Haruhi's mind seemed to go blank and then she thought she came to think about one thing. Haruhi found comfort in Tamaki's eyes. She wanted to last this moment.

But then she remembered something.

She expected to see a joyous shadow behind his eyes, yet, they were different from his eyes a while ago. She thought she might be imagining it but it seemed that Tamaki's eyes were ……

Pleading?

Haruhi can't be certain.

Maybe I'm just imagining things from the way things happened tonight but this was really weird.

To stop the suspicions, Haruhi turned away from Tamaki and went on walking.

"Tamaki?"

Haruhi heard someone looking for Tamaki. It was probably Kanoya. She risked a glance at Tamaki over her shoulder. She expected him to be gone in that instant.

Instead, she saw Tamaki, his hand outstretched to her, opening his mouth to speak, with regretful eyes staring back at her.

Haruhi looked away, thinking about what she saw.

Then, Tamaki went on walking to Kanoya, with a disappointed face Haruhi did not see.

"Isn't it great to have the six of us having a sleepover again?"

"And Hinata thought this was such a bad idea."

"We were right for having a sleepover."

"Because someone needs our help."

All of Haruhi's friends were curled up in Sakura's huge bed. They pursued the sleepover since they wanted to comfort her. Finally, Haruhi was crying her eyes out.

"I am such a baka." Haruhi said, blowing her nose.

Hinata gave Haruhi another tissue as Sakura threw the last one.

"Don't say that." Temari said.

"Yeah. The only baka here is Tamaki." Konan said.

"Haruhi." Hinata patted her best friends back. "I know this is not the right time to ask for this but I think you owe us a good explanation for all this craziness that has been going on for the past months."

All of Haruhi's friends looked at her, waiting for her to speak. They knew what Hinata meant, and Haruhi understood it too.

Haruhi has kept her secret for solid months. She thought that it would make matters worse if she was going to tell her friends about it.

But she underestimated them. Indeed, they were her best friends.

Haruhi cleared her throat then she took a deep breath, as if it was her last.

"It would have never come to this, " Haruhi started. "If it wasn't for constant teasings."

Haruhi paused, looking at Ino who was melting and melting by the minute. "I thought that I would not be affected by your teasing. It was just teasing after all, right? But then, I never realized that it would come to the point where I began to look for him, to care about him and even look for ways to be around him, just so I can talk to him." As Haruhi said this, she remembered those times when she and Tamaki were alone in their usual seat in the bus. How could she have missed that chance?

"When you guys stooped the teasing, I thought the feeling would just go away." Haruhi stopped. She can hardly say the darkest parts of her secret. Her friends seemed to be trustworthy enough just to help her. She then went on. "But I was wrong." She added a sigh. "When I saw him with Éclair, it somehow broke a part of me. I really don't what I felt. I mean, It's not something you get to experience everyday and I'm not so used to this. I was so confused. I thought I got over him but all along, I just learned to be away from him for a while."

Haruhi went on. "You may already know about last night and I think you guys already know what I felt. That was when I realized that what I was feeling for him was completely different."

Haruhi looked at her friends who were giving her worried and shocked looks. "You were right. I was already into him but I was never aware of it."

Tears welled up again in Haruhi's eyes when she ended her side of the story. Her friends were around her in that instant.

Ino sobbed a little. "This is my entire fault. I'm so sorry Haruhi."

"Don't blame yourself, Ino." Sakura said as she patted Haruhi's back. "We are also part of the blame since we also joined in teasing Haruhi."

"What are you going to do now Haruhi?" her friend, Temari asked.

Haruhi wiped her tears. "I just want us to be friends. Things have been so different lately. But…."

"But what?" Konan interjected.

"It seems that he doesn't want me to be his friend anymore.." Haruhi finished her sentence as she lingered on that look she saw on Tamaki when she walked out the CR.

The disappointment in his face was not appropriate that night, considering the happy occasion he was in.

It was almost three in the morning when the girls finally went to bed and continue solving their friend's problem the next day.

"Don't worry Haruhi." Ino told her friend as she spread out the blanket for them to share. "I'll help you deal with your problem, no matter what."

The next day, Haruhi packed her things to leave. Her mom told her to go home first thing that morning. She thanked Sakura and Sakura's mom then bade goodbye to her friends who were still snoring in their sleeps except for Sakura and Temari.

"Ohayou gozaimasu Sakura." Haruhi told Sakura as she gave her a hug.

"No problem." Sakura replied.

Temari took Haruhi's hands. "We will help you, no matter what."

Haruhi gave her friends a smile. "Thanks."

"How was your night at Sakura's?" Haruhi's mom asked when Haruhi finally arrived home.

"It was fine." Haruhi murmured. "Mom, I'll just go upstairs. I want to sleep."

"But how about breakfast?"

Haruhi smelled the scent of toasts and bacons. Her stomach grumbled at the scent, but she ignored it. Right now, she wanted to rest.

"I'll eat later mom." She said as she went upstairs.

Haruhi opened her room and she went immediately to her bed. She felt horribly tired. She wanted to die. There was still the hang-over of pain and sadness. She wanted to escape her awful reality by drifting to the place where peace was waiting her.

Was this the end then? Was leaving the answer to her problem? Haruhi may not have thought about suicide but she was not the kind of person who easily gives up. She was not a person who thinks of suicide as the only option left for her to do so as to be free of her problems. She may have already lost the fight to Kanoya but that was how life is. People learn from their mistakes and they just have to move on with their life.

Despite the fact that Tamaki was already with Kanoya, still she was in love with him.

She didn't notice that her mom went inside her room and was calling her attention.

"Look what I found." Haruhi's mom said as she opened her hand in front of Haruhi.

Haruhi could not believe her eyes. She was thinking about how it ever found its way back to her. Eventhough she was happy to see it again, she felt a pang of sadness since it wasn't whole anymore.

"Good thing I found it right?"

It may be against her will but Haruhi put the tiny thing in a place where Haruhi keeps her things that are special to her. She wanted to lock it away for safekeeping. She doesn't want to give up. Eventually, hope will be given to people who need it.

Then, Haruhi went to her bed to go the place where she found her peace, like what she saw in his eyes, carefully and keeping the other pair of Tamaki's earring safe for now.