No promise to this chapt. This chapt. Is 25KB minus disclaimer,my comments and legends.
NOTE: After this chapt. There SHOULD be A LOT A LOT A LOT lesser Shizuru and Natsuki interacting(or maybe not)…for maybe….a few more chapt.s hope you will still continue reading XD…bcuz I cant be jumping to ShizNat-ness so soon…It'll be too…rushed…and kinda stupid
Oh and…I have stopped disabling anonymous reviews(I forgot to enable it)
So…ANONYMOUS PPL PLS REVIEW! XD
But ofcuz it wud be btr if u signed in so I could rply if needed ^^
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Mai-hime or Mai-otome...can anyone tell me if u need ths in every chapt.? cuz i'm getting lazy to kerep writing this and legends.
Now for the legends in the story:
**=thoughts of the character because I am using Microsoft word2007 and I don't know if my italic words will be saved in the same format (Now i know it DOES save in the same format BUT i still wanna keep it ^^)
the line that is grayish = after a period of time
---------- = something that is happening at the SAME time the next scene happens
Thanks krugern for spamming my reviews…lol XD
CHAPTER 11-TRUE? OR FAKE?
Mai followed behind Natsuki as they trudged to school in silence.
Mai was too busy with the way Tate had told her "I love you" last night and Natsuki was thinking about another weird dream she had of Shizuru in her child days.
*Heck, what the hell is wrong with me? I dream of some council president of some stupid school for two days in a row and what's worse is every time I dream of her she's … a child?...Holy shit there must be something wrong with my mind…Or maybe…I just remembered wrongly…every time I wake up I know I have dreamt of her…but I don't know what exactly had happened…then how the hell do I know that she's a child in my dreams anyway? It must be just my stupid imagination…it must b-* Natsuki's thoughts cut-off when she heard the girl beside her squeal…like a fan girl.
Mai covered her mouth when she noticed what she had done.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Natsuki said as she looked around the area to see if there was anything to look at.
"U-um…nothing…I just…remembered that I had forgotten to bring my wallet to school" Mai sighed tiredly.*If Natsuki finds out I squealed just because of a memory, I'm soo busted…*
"Ya' wanna go take it? It's less than a minute's walk back to the dorms ya' know?"
"N-no that will be fine" Mai stuttered as she saw Natsuki stare at her with confusion.
"Whatever" Natsuki muttered as she continued walking.
"Shizuru" Haruka said as she stared into crimson.
"Yes Haruka-chan?" Shizuru said while she continued to follow Haruka through the front gate.
"Why did you volunteer to walk me to school?"
"Ara ara, can't I walk Haruka to school?"
"Yes of course you can, but…by the front gate? Now that's new."
"I decided yesterday that the view you got when you walked in by the front gate was nicer than the back…so I decided to take the front".
"View? What View"
"Natsu-you can see the front of the clock tower here and I've always loved the design of the clock tower…so I decided to come by the front gate" Shizuru lied as she continued to walk as though nothing had happened, though her steps faltered a bit.
*Ara-this is bad…I cant be thinking of Natsuki so much that I even…Natsuki…but she is the reason why I came isn't she…*
Haruka noticed a change in the crimson she was looking at and turned away. *Bubuzuke looks troubled… I wonder what it's about… she rarely seems troubled…or maybe just never shows it…*
"Does Haruka-chan like this view too?" Shizuru said in a soft tone.
"Obviously…why the hell else would I take this route here everyday?" Haruka said as she folded her arms and looked in the direction of the clock tower.
Shizuru chuckled before teasing "Ara…so Yukino is Haruka-chan's view?"
"Hell NO!"
"Then…You think Yukino's an eyesore?"
"NONONONO! NEVER!" Haruka said as she felt almost guilty for saying that Yukino was not a nice view and then reddened at her thoughts.
Shizuru turned her head to the right to see a blushing Haruka and giggled.
"Hey, stop laughing"
"Oh there's Haruka's favourite view" She said when she saw Yukino sitting at her usual table with a few friends.
Haruka decided not to reply since silent meant consent though at the same time, she hoped that Shizuru would not realize what her 'no answer' meant.
Haruka bounded off in the direction of Yukino, leaving Shizuru alone as she headed in the direction of the year one classes.
She was walking pass classroom 5 when she heard Natsuki's voice.
"Hey Chie, Aoi" Natsuki acknowledged as she walked toward the pair.
"Hey Kruger…you know, the gossip's getting about…as in it was already known…but by more people now…you're a star" Chie said with a small chuckle as she teased the blue haired girl in front of her
Natsuki growled at Chie's statement, making sure not to do anything counted as bad to Mai incase she got a whack on her head again.
"Chie's right…didn't you notice the tons of people staring at you? And I suspect you already have a fan club for your bad ass behavior and for being able to hookup the Kaicho" Aoi affirmed as she wrapped her arms around Chie's neck.
Natsuki raised a brow at Aoi's action, "I do not hook up and hell…I'm not with the Kaicho".
"But so much evidence proves you are…the Kaicho even came to visit" Chie said as she smiled at Aoi's gesture.
"She was looking for Mai!"Natsuki protested a tad too loud, making a few more students stare at her other than the ones who already were.
"What about the compromising pose part?" Aoi supported.
Natsuki glared at most of them, not wanting the attention.*I HAVE to stop this stupid gossip now*
"Well, tell you what" Natsuki said as she stared at Chie who looked at her expectantly when the words left her mouth.
"I am" Natsuki paused to make sure everyone was hearing.
"Straight" She finished as she made a small victory smile though somehow she felt a small shock travel through her body.
"…really?..." Chie said, her voice cautious as if to test if it were a lie.
"Yes" Natsuki said as walked pass Chie to the direction of the council room. Her steps were faster than usual as she clutched the collar of her shirt. *This feels like…a heartbreak?…do I really…*
She pushed the thoughts away, not wanting to know what she had really felt.
Shizuru stood there expressionless as she watched Natsuki walk down the hallway.
A few students who had walked pass her gave her questioning looks as if to say 'what is the Kaicho doing here and 'wow…she's really pretty… She's the Kaicho right? You don't get a real council member here everyday'
Shizuru forced a smile at the students looking at her, making most of them swoon as she trailed the path Natsuki had taken, passing a shocked Aoi and Chie.
"Hey, do you think the Kaicho heard that?" Chie whispered into Aoi's ear as the Kyoto woman walked pass them.
"I think so…but she doesn't seem affected, is there really nothing happening between them?" Aoi whispered back as the Kaicho disappeared down the hallway.
Shizuru joined Nao and Natsuki soon after Natsuki had reached the council room.
"Natsuki, Yuuki-san" Shizuru said with a small nod as she led them into the room.
Natsuki looked up at the Kaicho, her chest tightening.
"Shizuru…" She trailed.
Nao had just ignored the other girl's greeting and entered the room.
They were led to the same room as before and sat down on the floor, neither of the three saying anything.
*I told you…Shizuru…Natsuki's straight.* Shizuru pondered as she examined the two girls after three hour of silence and work.
*All I have to do now is to let this useless crush and forbidden love fade off…I guess…* Shizuru continued as she felt the pull at her heart get worse.
FLASHBACK, 10 years ago
A tall man clad in a formal business suit looked down at a crimson eyed little girl as he broke the news of a certain blue-haired kid's migration.
"She migrated to Tokyo" He lied.
Shizuru was trying not to cry, she knew that she could control her tears, but she could not control the sadness she let show to her dad.
"That, Shizuru, is all that you will receive for such feelings", He finished as he looked into the girl's sad eyes.
"Shizuru, for your own sake, I want you to promise me to never have such feelings…or even thoughts of having such feelings" The elder Fujino said as he walked to his study table and sat down.
"Yes, dad…I'll never ever do it again." Shizuru managed a small smile as she went over to complete her promise with an assuring hug.
Shizuru's dad had remained straight faced, knowing very obviously that Shizuru's smile and gesture was a lie but relaxing into his chair since he knew very well that Shizuru understood what he had meant I would uphold her promise.
END of flashback
Shizuru fell back into her cushioned chair in exhaustion from her earlier thought as she typed out a poem she was supposed to create for her most recent Literature project:
I am a soul trapped from the start
In a place of eternal hell
With a wanting so unfulfilled and forbidden
Disgusted by many, cherished by few
Is it possible to kill or fulfill this arctic craving?
She had never been good at poems and frowned at her inability to write a poem.
She put her hands on the keyboard again as she tried harder, using some of the feelings she felt to describe the character's feelings in the story.
I blinked back my tears
The truth now ever so clear
Everything I had held dear
Which was once near, is now so mere
EVERYTHING I had ever relished
Has vanished, my hopes left to tarnish
Like my life was just for a jeer
Driven by nothing but little comfort
This path has become too hazy
in this 'DREAM' that seems scary
save me....
no one can its closed,
totally unopposed
the wind blows strong now...
it greets me with cold hardness
but yet it felt like...
the greeting had come from my heart
I try to hide from the nostalgia,
As I remember the past events I have loved so,
like it happened not long ago
an unknown guilt washes over
that foreboding feeling rushes in
drowning me with fear and undone wishes
found in the depths of my heart
winding it's way to my soul and start
It feels like a haunting
Very so daunting
The sky seems dark yet bright
like how there is gray,
between black and white
I am here to wake up from this 'DREAM'
but now I shun at the thought
I feel like a coward forever
beyond where courage lay
I want to scream out loud
Yet there is no one there
As the sky grows darker
And my heart sinks faster…
my memories forced to follow
my feelings gone…
in a second
I try to catch it back in
and hold it tight forever
like it was my life's line
But I am left alone with
Only myself to keep me sane over my own rein
My courage is the only remain
Of that of the bright sky
As I end this 'dream' of pain...........
She stopped short on her keyboard when she was done with the poem and looked at Natsuki who was staring back at her, her head cocked to one side.
Natsuki's gesture made Shizuru feel as though her soul was torn apart, *have I not learned her lesson before?… I even had hopes of…I am such a sin*
"Hey, Kaicho…can I go to the toilet?" Nao cut into Shizuru's thoughts as she stared back the chestnut haired woman.
Shizuru gave in to her laziness and let Nao go by two girls were left in silence again after Nao left.
"Shizuru?" Natsuki said, finally shaking off her thoughts and the growing dread she felt deep inside.
Shizuru felt her mouth go dry ad she continued staring back at Natsuki with no reply.
"Shizuru?" Natsuki said in a softer and more worried tone.
"Yes, Natsuki?" Shizuru said after a few seconds.
"Y-you seem out of sorts today…" Natsuki paused when she felt that dread creeping up again and she tore her gaze from Shizuru and looked back at the floor
"A-and even…sad…are you okay?"
"Ara, is Natsuki worried? I am so touched" Shizuru answered with a cold tease as she saved the file in her computer and stood up to stretch.
"Well…what If I am?" Natsuki said as she tried to warm herself by putting her hands to her neck.
Shizuru frowned when she saw that Natsuki didn't have the jacket with her *Ara…obviously…she doesn't have it with her, what would people think if she did?...and, how did she tell that I was sad, did I handle myself that badly?*
"Ara ara Natsuki is sure observant, I don't think I showed my unhappiness"
"So you are…"Natsuki trailed off as she made a small frown *what is Shizuru sad about…I-I don't want to see her sad…*
"I could see from your eyes…" She said when Shizuru sat back down.
"My eyes?"
"Yea…it's duller than before…and, it's just a feeling I get", Natsuki said as she hid the part that she felt sad when Shizuru seemed sad…and the earlier on event did not help either.
"Natsuki is reading too much into it…I was just troubled over my project" Shizuru lied.
Natsuki got a feeling that Shizuru was lying but kept quiet incase Shizuru found her a nuisance.
Shizuru felt the need to clear things…maybe she felt like this just because Natsuki resembled the girl she loved in the past.
"Natsuki?"
"Yes?"
"You're from Kyoto right?"
"H-how did you know? It's not like I have some accent or something"
"I read your file"
"Hey!" Natsuki said in a mock angry tone.
"Ara, is Natsuki angry with that?"
"No, but I feel like my privacy has just been invaded" Natsuki pouted.
Shizuru made a small smile, "I heard you migrated, before migrating to America, did you migrate anywhere else?"
"No, why?"
"Nothing…" Shizuru said as she turned away, not sure whether to be happy or sad.
Nao came in soon after the conversation and sat down back on the spot she was sitting at earlier on.
"Ara…it seems I had forgot to tell you two something" Shizuru said.
"What? The sky is falling?" Nao spat, irritated with the boredom she had to go through.
"Your suspension will end tomorrow…you don't have to come again tomorrow" She finished with a soft smile.
"WHAT?" Natsuki and Nao both said at the same time, both feeling differently about the news.
Natsuki felt a pang of sadness hit her. That meant she did not have any reason to see the Kaicho. *just when I start to …like…yes, like…not….*She brushed her thought away as she saw what it would eventually lead to…something she didn't want to think about yet…or ever.
"Why?" Natsuki said her voice sounded almost hurt, making Shizuru flinch.
"Ara, Haruka and I have decided to spare you from 3 more days of suffering since you two are first timers and are new to this school".
"Oh…" It was Natsuki's turn to flinch from Shizuru's words. She felt horrible when Shizuru had said it was a torture to be with her.*It's not a torture!...I-I enjoy your company….*
Nao walked out of the council room feeling happy that her hell was finally over whilst Natsuki's sadness just got worse every second.
"Hey pup, wanna go celebrate?" Nao asked.
"No thanks…" Natsuki said softly, earning a confused gaze from Nao.
"Are you okay?"Nao said with a tad bit of worry
"Yes…" Natsuki replied tiredly, all she had wanted now was a way to get the heavy feeling and sadness which was killing her, off her mind.*I'll go take my Ducati for a ride…then shower and go to sleep…I'm sure it'll make me feel better*
"Fine, I'll leave the PMS-ing pup alone" Nao said as she walked off.
"See you later" Natsuki said as she split ways with her room mate, her reaction was a shock to Nao, though she didn't bother caring since she was too happy with her 'release'.
Natsuki dialed the Mai's number on her phone.
"Hey Mai, care to nag?"
"So early? It's only…"Mai trailed off as she looked at her watch.
"Seven" Natsuki finished for her.
"Yes…Why do you want to sleep so early?"
"It's my celebration for finally ending Internal Suspension" Natsuki lied.
"Have you had dinner?"
"No, but I had tea break".
"WHAT? You'll spoil your stomach like that!" Mai said, unconsciously starting to nag.
*That did it….* Natsuki said as she lay down waiting for herself to doze off.
Crimson looked into the mirror as she washed her face repeatedly, afraid to acknowledge the answer she had gotten aboutbher feelings for a certain blue-haired girl.
"Natsuki…" She said as she wiped her face with a bathroom towel.
"I-I love you…" She said as she pressed the towel to her face to stop her tears.
U-um hope you liked it…came back frm camp yesterday but didn't have the mood to write…the camp was BOOOOORING
But I made quite a few new friends there ^^
Um…flame or review please
THANKS FOR READING XD