Um…I rushed this out…sorry if it sucks…..it's 25KB ^^

longest chapt. title o0

oh and...I've gotten this new idea for a story...but i've decided to start writing only after I'm done with this story...

So i MIGHT rush it bit cuz i wann right the new story...please tell me if i am rushing it...but ofcuz i wont just say THE END now...i'm trying my best not to rush the story

I dont wanna write 2 at the same time cuz i've got this 'loyalty' issue XD ^^

so....THANKS FOR READING!

NOTE:PLEASE GO to my profile and do this poll bout the hidaru thing thanks ^^

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Mai-hime or Mai-otome...can anyone tell me if u need ths in every chapt.? cuz i'm getting lazy to keep writing this and legends.

Now for the legends in the story:

**=thoughts of the character because I am using Microsoft word2007 and I don't know if my italic words will be saved in the same format (Now i know it DOES save in the same format BUT i still wanna keep it ^^)

the line that is grayish = after a period of time

---------- = something that is happening at the SAME time the next scene happens(um...I just noticed that Since around chapt. 3 FF had been converting all my ------ into gray lines...so...this is not valid anymore o0 only the one above is so you'll have to guess XD MUAHAHAHA ....^^ PS)

CHAPTER 16-THAT LOST PIECE OF MY SOUL

*Why do I feel this way…* Natsuki thought as she dazed at the whiteboard full of scores and theories.

*It's like…I'm so happy, yet I'm not...* She turned her gaze to the window on her right.

*Mom's coming…Alyssa is too I've always wanted them to come visit me…mom's condition is better too…then why am I…*The bell rang, signaling the time for lunch break.

"Natsuki, are you going for lunch?" Mai asked as she tapped on the blue-haired girl's shoulder. *Natsuki hasn't been herself lately…I've got to use this chance to ask her about it, after all, I've been running off with Tate so much that I only noticed this after Chie told me about it…*

Natsuki sat up straight when she felt Mai's cold hand on her shoulder, "Shizuru!" she called out as she grabbed Mai's hand.

"N-Natsuki?" Mai's eyes widened.

Natsuki turned back and realized who it was, "O-oh Mai…I thought it was…nothing"

"Are you sure you're ok Natsuki? You haven't been acting yourself lately, even Nao realized it" Mai said, her voice thick with worry.

"Y-yea I'm ok, see?" Natsuki said as she stood up and stretched her arms out to give Mai a hug.

"Natsuki?" Mai said in shock *Natsuki isn't the kind of person who would hug someone just like that, is she sure that she's ok?*

"I haven't gone to recess with you for more than a week already, lets go, I don't wanna end up queuing for food ya' know?" Natsuki said in a faux-happy voice as she walked out of the classroom and headed for the cafeteria.

"Natsuki…" Mai whispered as she followed her out.

Shizuru sat down on a patch of grass near the river as she leaned back on the pillar of the gazebo.

Hidaru let out a sigh as she walked up to Shizuru, making sure she was not heard.

"Shi-zu-ru" Hidaru whispered from behind as she leaned close to Shizuru and rested her head on her shoulder.

Shizuru's eyes widened as she slowly turned back to meet the owner of the voice.

"What ja' thinkin' of?"

"Nothing…" Shizuru said as she looked away, not wanting to meet Hidaru's gaze since the odler girl could always tell what was on her mind.

"Hidaru?" Shizuru asked, her voice sounding unsure.

"Yes?"

"Would you defy your dad if there was somebody you-" Shizuru stopped short, unsure of whether to share her thoughts or not.

"Shizuru…" Hidaru whispered, trying to make Shizuru feel better.

"N-nothing…" Shizuru said as she felt her eyes water a bit.

*Shizuru…It hurts that bad huh?...I wonder if she felt like this at that time…before she died…*

Shizuru tried her best to hold her tears in as she closed her eyes and tilted her head up.

"No one else is here Shizuru...and it's not like I haven't seen you cry before" Hidaru whispered as she circled her arms around Shizuru's waist.

"Hidaru…" Shizuru said, her voice shivered from the coldness she felt inside as tears rolled down her cheek as she pushed back to get more of Hidaru's warmth.

Hidaru made a sad smile as she leaned over to kiss Shizuru's ear.

Natsuki sat at the table where Nao, Chie and Aoi were seated.

"Where's Mai?" Natsuki said, finally breaking out of her daze.

Chie frowned at Natsuki, "Natsuki, are you sure you're ok? You haven't even glared at anyone today"

"Yea, I am"

"Mai went to get her food"

"Oh, ok…Give me a minute, I'm going to the toilet" Natsuki said as she stood up and walked in the direction of the toilets.

*When Mai tapped me…I…* Natsuki thought as when shecouldnt hear the noise of the cafeteria.

*I haven't seen her for four days now…* She thought as she hastened her steps to the toilet.

*Where did she go?*

*Is it that she doesn't want to see me?*

*What did I do?* Natsuki said as she stepped into the empty toilet.

*Why do I feel this way…I just can't stop thinking of…her*

*Why cant I fucking get myself sorted out?!* Natsuki thought as she clenched her fists, her confusion turning into anger.

"Are you sure you're okay? Natsuki?" Hidaru asked in a husky tone as she closed the toilet door behind her.

"HECK! HOW MANY TIMES MUST I TELL YOU THT I'M O-" Natsuki said as she spun around to meet Hidaru's crimson eyes.

"So you really aren't okay are you? Looks like your friends noticed too" Hidaru said, her voice suddenly becoming foreign to Natsuki since its usual playfulness wasn't there

"I'm fine, even happy, my mom and sis is coming to visit ya' know" Natsuki lied.

"If you're fine then why assure me that you're happy, the usual Natsuki isn't like that you know?" Hidaru said as she walked toward Natsuki.

"I just didn't want you to bother me"

"You know…" Hidaru said as she turned on the tap, "She even cried today"

Natsuki stood still. *She…as in Shizuru? Shizuru…cried? For what? Why would she cry…?!*

Hidaru turned off the tap and stared at Natsuki.

Natsuki felt uncomfortable under Hidaru's stare as she tore her gaze away, "Is she…okay?"

"Well…no" Hidaru answered honestly.

* I wanna see her right now.* Natsuki thought as she slowly relaxed her once clenched fists.

"But don't go looking for her Kruger" Hidaru said as though she could read Natsuki thoughts.

"At least not until you really realize what's happening" Hidaru said as she spun around and walked off.

"What is happening?" Natsuki asked, though she had a small idea of what Hidaru was talking about. *What is happening?...to what? Me? What I feel?*

"What do you treat Shizuru as? Who is she to you? Natsuki Kruger" Hidaru said as she opened the door and walked out.

"What do I treat Shizuru as?"Natsuki whispered as she stood there, frozen to her spot.

"Natsuki?" came Mai's voice as she entered the toilet.

"Mai?"

"I heard you came to the toilet so I came to check on you, are you okay…as in…for real?"

"No, I'm not okay"

"Natsuki?"Mai asked again, not expecting that answer.

"But I'm gonna solve the problem, its okay, it'll be okay"

"Tell me if you need help okay?" Mai said as she signaled for Natsuki to follow her back to the canteen.

Natsuki nodded as she followed Mai back to the cafeteria.

Mai gave Natsuki a small smile and slowed down a little so that she could walk beside Natsuki.

"Onee-chan! Mai-san!" Alyssa said happily as she hugged Natsuki.

"Alyssa! Have you had dinner yet?" Mai said as she took off her apron.

"Why, yes she has had dinner, but she didn't eat much since she had wanted to taste your cooking, Mai…though it's a pity there are no more leftovers" Saeko Kruger said as she gave Mai a bear hug.

"R-really? I'm not that good you know?" Mai said with a small blush.

Saeko gave Mai an assuring smile as she made her way to the table where Chie, Aoi and Nao were seated, "May I?"

The three raised their eyebrows in confusion as they looked at Saeko.

"May I sit down?" Saeko said when she noticed that the three girls didn't get what she had meant.

"O-of course!" Chie and Aoi said in unison.

"Natsuki has very pleasant friends doesn't she?" Saeko said as she smoothed out her skirt and sat down.

"Mhm! Sis is a nice person, therefore she has nice friends!"Alyssa said cheerfully.

Natsuki scowled, "Nice people alright"

Mai looked at Natsuki and clucked her tongue, "Natsuki!"

"What?!"

Saeko giggled a little as she looked around Natsuki's room.

"Natsuki?" Saeko started as she looked at her daughter.

"Yes, mom?"

"You know…"

"Yea?"

"I bought something for you"

"Something? Like wh-" Natsuki's cheeks reddened when she realized what her mom had meant.

"U-um thanks mom" She continued after recovering from her shock.

Chie gave Natsuki the: tell me stare as she raised her eyebrows.

"Never!"

"Oh you mean something that has gotta' do with your collection?" Nao said, uninterested.

"N-Nao!"

"Oh! She knows? Sis doesn't really tell people you know?" Alyssa said as she looked Nao over. *Somebody that's close to onee-chan…*

"No! I didn't tell her, she dug it out on the day I came" Natsuki said, remembering that she still had her bra confiscated. *Maybe Hidaru or Shizu-……Shizuru…

-------------------

Flashback

-------------------

"Don't go looking for her Kruger" Hidaru said as though she could read Natsuki thoughts.

"At least not until you really realize what's happening" Hidaru said as she spun around and walked off.

"What is happening?" Natsuki asked.

"What do you treat Shizuru as? Who is she to you? Natsuki Kruger" Hidaru said as she opened the door and walked out.

------------------

End of flashback

------------------

*What do I treat her as?...she's a friend…right?*

"Natsuki? Natsuki?" Mai said worriedly, snapping Natsuki out of her thoughts.

"H-huh? What?"

"Looks like onee-chan was dazing off again"

"Oh yea…" Natsuki said as she scratched the back of her head sheepishly.

"Natsuki, we have to go now, the guard of the dormitory told us that we strictly only had fifteen minutes here since it is pass your curfew"

"W-what so soon?" Natsuki felt her heart sink.

"We'll come tomorrow to pick you up since it's a Saturday, okay?" Saeko said with a smile as she waved goodbye to her older daughter and left the room.

"Bye!" Natsuki and Mai shouted in unison.

"Compared to Natsuki…I wouldn't believe these three were related if I didn't hear it in advance" Nao said as both Chie and Aoi nodded in agreement.

"Well, we had better be going too Natsuki…good night" Mai said as she opened the door, "Oh and, call me if you want…I'm sorry I didn't answer that day".

"Naa, it's ok…I wanna try to fall asleep by myself" Natsuki said as Chie and Aoi left the room. *I need to think over some things….*

"Sure?"

"Yea"

"Awwww the pup is growing up" Nao joked as she turned off the lights.

"Shudup" Natsuki said as silence engulfed the room.

"Nao?" Natsuki said after awhile.

"Yea?"

"Goodnight" She said as she made herself comfortable.

"Goodnight" Nao said as she snuggled up and went to sleep.

Natsuki turned to where Nao was supposedly sleeping as she narrowed her eyes and tried to adapt to the darkness.

*What do I feel for you Shizuru?* Natsuki thought as she clutched her shirt.

*I feel as thought this horrible feeling will last for as long as I do not find out the truth of what I…I feel…about you…Shizuru* Natsuki said as she felt suffocated by the silence and the darkness of the room.

*Is it just the silence and the darkness?...or is it more of…the fact that this feeling…*Natsuki tightened the grip on her shirt.

*I feel as though…I'm suffocated…by this feeling, by everything that's happening*

"By the guilt that I feel deep inside" Natsuki whispered absentmindedly

*The guilt?* Natsuki thought as she realized the words that had escaped her mouth *Deep down inside…?*

*The guilt of trying to…suppress my feelings* Natsuki opened her eyes as she tried to think of how she had felt whenever she saw Shizuru.

"Is it?" Natsuki whispered again.

*From the start…She had always seemed like somebody precious*

*Somebody precious…to me…* Natsuki said as she remembered the dreams that she always had. *Like somewhere deep down…I've always yearned for her, yearned for her to talk to me…caress me…*

*That feeling I have for her…*

*Is it…*

FLASHBACK

A certain small blue haired girl stood with her hands pressing onto the glass window of a mechanic shop, her emerald eyes scanning it's surroundings.

"MY Na-tsu-ki what are you looking at?" a silk smooth voice said from behind her. "I want to become a biker when I grow up…." Natsuki herd herself say, not taking heed of Shizuru's question.

Natsuki then felt Shizuru wrap her arms around her neck as she rested her head on Natsuki's shoulders allowing her lips to lightly graze pass Natsuki's ear for a second

The sound of the brunette's breathing jolted Natsuki from her little dream world causing her to jump

Natsuki took a few moments to register what Shizuru had done before…shouting, "Shi..Shizuru! What are you doing here?"

"My parents went to meet yours for a business deal and left me here to play with you Natsuki" the brunette replied, tugging the blue haired girl closer to her by wrapping her arms around the other's neck.

"What!? Did you say…p-play with me?"

Upon hearing what her little pup had said, Shizuru turned the younger girl around to face her, sliding her hands down to Natsuki's waist" Ara…what did MY Natsuki have in mind when she said that?..you do notice it's a little troubling to have an 8 year old saying that, no?" Natsuki's cheeks turned a few shades red" D-did I think of anything?...N-no I wasn't thinking, I cant think when you're…I mean! I wasn't thinking of anything wrong Shizuru! And I'm NOT yours for the last time!"

Hearing what the blue haired girl had said, she removed her hands from her Natsuki's waist and pouted, putting on a faux-crying face. Natsuki's head whirled at the sight afraid that she had made the other girl cry. Putting her hands on shizuru's shoulder to try and make things better, she said"um….I'm yours, seriously…see?"

Shizuru decided to not torture her girlfriend anymore and looked up"really?". "Yea" upon hearing her desired answer, she embraced Natsuki in a tight hug. Not knowing what to do, the poor pup had just hugged her 'master' back.

Taking advantage of the situation, Shizuru had pulled away just enough to see shocked emeralds and gave Natsuki a small kiss on her lips. Then pulled back fully so as to see the younger girl's reaction.

Natsuki's gaze held on to emeralds her head spinning from another 'shocking' realization, unable to move….*damnit!i should by immune to this by now! If I should be then why do I feel my cheeks getting hotter by the second!?* She could only manage to stutter a reply of incoherent broken words.

In the middle of watching her Natsuki stutter, Shizuru's phone vibrated in her pocket. She fished it out and pulled it to her ear. "ok…"was Shizuru's short reply when she had heard what the man had said

"Ara, Natsuki…I'll have to see you another time..My dad's here to pick me up"

"What? So fast?!..um…I mean yea, ok…bye. See you another day "she replied, saddened by the fact that she got to meet up with Shizuru for only such a short while.

A car pulled up by the drive way minutes later

"Bye MY Natsuki See you soon" Shizuru whispered into Natsuki's ear, giving her a soft peck on her ear so no one looking from inside the car could see.

"Bye Shizuru…"

Shizuru got into the car, as Natsuki waved goodbye to her…for the last time…?

END OF FLASHBACK

Natsuki paused as a certain memory of a doctor injecting her with something her dad had briefed her about rushed in.

Her eyes widened as she lay on her bed for several minutes, not wanting to move and not daring to move.

"Shizuru?"Natsuki whispered.

"Was that…" Natsuki said as she felt the hand on her shirt tremble.

"Shizuru?" Natsuki said as tears flowed out.

"That was her wasn't it?"

"Those weren't dreams were they?...tell me their real" Natsuki whispered, her voice filled with desperation.

"Shizuru…." Natsuki said as her voice turned hoarse.

"I-I"

"I love you"

"I've loved you from the start…" Natsuki said as she made a small smile.

"And the reason you cried…they didn't give you the injection they gave me did they?"Natsuki said with a bitter smile.

"Thanks Hidaru"

"You allowed me find her back after ten years"

"That lost piece of my soul"

Um…it's very late now….gtg go sleep XD

PLEASE R&R

THANKS FOR READING!!!!