A/N: I AM SO SO SO SO SORRY I DIDN'T UPDATE!!! BUT I DIDN'T GET ANY REVIEWS SO I THOUGHT NO ONE WAS READING IT so….….PLEASE REVIEW and I was actually trying to study for midterms AND DOES NO ONE KNOW HOW U MAKE THOSE LITTLE HEARTS???

Alice's POV

"Jasper…" I began. "You…won't be able to visit…will you?" I tried to be causal. Of course I didn't blame him for this, so I wasn't angry. Just a little disappointed; Maybe a little scared and afraid. But I didn't know why; I just had a bad feeling. Not just about our kids…but Jasper. I felt like something was wrong; that there was something he wasn't telling me.

"…no." he said hesitantly shaking his head. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I understand." I said; he shouldn't feel responsible for something he couldn't control. I understood…really; but that still didn't change the fact that this would be the last time I'd ever see him.

Jasper's POV

"Don't be. I understand." Alice said. But the understanding didn't really reach her eyes- only unshed tears.

"Alice, I really am sorry." I stroked her hair in an attempt to comfort her, but I knew the only thing that could truly comfort her was if I was alive and if I could promise to marry her and raise the children with her. But I wasn't alive and I couldn't do any of those things. And I wasn't about to leave her empty promises. I wasn't about to leave her hanging on false hope. I had seen what it had done to Bella and wouldn't do that to Alice. "But I just can't risk it. I promise though, you'll understand-"

"Risk what?" Alice asked. Her voice wasn't sad or angry; she just sounded tired and curious. There were a few tears rolling down her cheeks, but she wasn't crying. Alice hardly cried unless things got so bad she couldn't do much else. So I knew she had to understand to degree, and that was a relief. All she wanted was an explanation; I could give her that much.

"I…I'm not supposed to be here; I supposed to be in heaven- always. Leaving is never allowed. And I know that if I keep coming…It will be harder to stop- for both of us. And then eventually-

"You'll get caught." It wasn't a question. "It's alright, but I just…wanted to know." She nodded and then looked down on her lap. A few tears dropped down on her nightgown. It was quiet for awhile; because I didn't really know what to say- nothing I could say would comfort her. "well on the brightside, when you die, we can be together again!" that just didn't seem sensitive. "I understand…" I heard her mumble, but I don't think it was for me to hear.

"Alice…I know you understand." And I did. I knew she understood and that she didn't blame me (even though I blamed me) but I also knew she was just putting on a strong face for me. She did that for everyone. But she didn't need to protect me- I had to protect her. "Everyone is…being extra cautious- someone's been down and-" I said too much; Alice didn't need to know that Edward had been the one who had broken the rules. She didn't need to blame him or Bella.

"I know it was Edward." She said reading my mind. She wiped her face and spoke casually. "I know everything" she whispered playfully in response to the shock that was more than obvious on my face.

Alice's POV

"You're right Alice." Jasper mused. "I never really could surprise you." He laughed lightly. But all I had to offer was a weak smile- a complete 180 from my usually bright happy grin. I vaguely wondered if I would ever be able to smile again. But then I began to think about Bella and Edward.

Me and Jasper's relationship so much different than Bella and Edward; not to say that they weren't in love, or that their relationship was screwed or that they were stupid- we were all just different people. Take for instance Jasper and Edward and how they make decisions; Jasper loves me, but that doesn't keep him from making the right decision. And I know that even if it hurts at the time, that Jasper did what was best for the both of us. The only thing that bothers me is how emotionless Jasper can be at times; I know he doesn't mean to be, but for once I wish he would allow himself to feel and to show it.

Edward was blinded by love and worry when he made decisions; not that I blame him for worrying about Bella, but he didn't really give her enough credit. She was strong if she was given the chance. But then again, at least he allowed himself to feel…

My thoughts began to wander then my eyes began to close without my permission; but I was so tired…

"Alice?" Jasper called in a whisper as he gently stroked my face.

"Hmmm?" I barely mumbled so even I couldn't hear. My eyes warily tried to find Jasper, but only darkness met them. Only then had I realized that my eyes had drooped down without my permission (which made me see just how tired I was); I knew I should sleep, but I didn't want to. These could- would be my last few moments with Jasper and I wasn't going to waste them sleeping. But…I was so tired…

"Alice- baby if you're tired I can leav-" he began, but I wouldn't allow him to speak another word.

"NO!" my eyes flew open instantly, and a single tear fell down my cheek in the process; I usually wasn't so dependant, but I needed him with me right now. I was just so weak and tired and scared. But I hid that one tear as well as my real feeling away from Jasper, and I knew it worked when he chuckled. "I'm not tired- I was just resting for a minute. I'm all better now. Stay." I smiled playfully as I struggled to keep my eyes open. He merely chuckled again.

"You were falling asleep…" he teased. And in that moment, in the tone he used in the way he smiled and in the way I felt- things seemed normal. I don't know why but things just felt right. Maybe because we had stopped talking about our troubles but I felt like Jasper had never even died.

"I can sleep any old time!!" I shot back as I laughed. I was still tired but it was a nice kind of tired- lazy. Where everything is slow and calm and you feel good despite being achy and drowsy.

"You can sleep and I'll watch?" he offered. I scoffed.

"That's not creepy…" I muttered. "I will not waste my time with you sleeping so-" I finished by sticking my tongue out at him. We went on from there- just mindless and endless chatter. We didn't talk about anything in particular. It was a comfort to me; so much so that I completely forgot about all my pain and worries. But I noticed that Jasper seemed to be growing more and more uncomfortable- he was trying to hide it from me, his discomfort. And up until this point it had worked. "Jasper…" I sighed. "Why didn't you just tell me? I wouldn't have minded."

"What are you talking about?" he asked attempting (and failing) to play dumb.

"Jasper, if you have to leave just say so. I don't mean to keep you. I know it's just making it harder for you.

"…I can st-"

"No you cant. And you know it. Now go! I need my beauty sleep." I winked at him. He still looked unsure though as he got up from my side. My mind screamed don't go, stay I need you! And screw heaven! But I knew this was for the best. "I'll be fine." He nodded quickly, and took my hand in his.

"I know you will." He leaned down and kissed my softly on the lips and I happily kissed back. But I stopped it short- it was going to be hard enough without that memory.

"Go on." I shoo-d him as I smiled. "Heaven is missing an angel." And I laughed lightly at my cliché joke. "I'll be there soon."

"But not too soon?" he sounded worried and it was adorable. But it made me worry too…kinda. But I promised to myself I wouldn't let that happen.

"No. I'm a mother now…" I grinned at the thought. "I have something new to live for." He winced at my words, but smiled anyway, trying to recover.

"You'll be a great mom. And I'll be watching, I promise." He leaned down one last time to give me one last kiss. And then he whispered into my ear, seductive and sweet, "sleep."

I sighed. Sleep did sound good right about now. So I closed my eyes and prayed that I would keep this memory to replay over and over again. And when I was done, I whispered to him one last time.... "goodnight Jasper…"

A/N: REVIEW PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!