Hey, Janae here. Wow. Things have been pretty crazy up here on Catacombs.

So, Geoff's in major legal trouble. Mom is major pissed about the whole thing and says she'll take him to court in a heartbeat, but I don't think I'm gonna press charges.

Hikaru told me about how they found out Haverson was at the school for a board of trustees meeting, (as a matter of fact, he's donated his own fair share of money to Catacombs…specifically, to the facilities management department! Ironic, right?) and then pulled him OUT of the meeting to come and talk to who they thought was a disgruntled employee: me.

However, in a caramel-covered, bacon-bit sprinkled nugget of sweet karma, they walked in on Geoff's little "intervention"…and then performed an intervention of their own.

The matter was brought to the attention of the school, who promptly fired Geoff. After learning of his termination, several other facilities girls stepped forward with harassment lawsuits against him.

Mr Havenson, who actually had suspected that his wife was cheating on him, served Tashira with divorce papers. She didn't get a dime after the trial. Upon hearing about Geoff's multiple indiscretions, she dropped him and ran off with some trashy male supermodel, claiming, "I never realized what Geoff was doing. If I had known, I never would have picked him up in the first place."

Yeah, right.

Apparently, (but this is according to a trashloid I read in the checkout line at Wal-Mart) the two met by chance at an important business meeting which Mr Havenson had brought Tashira along for. When Geoff saw her, cash signs went off in his eyes. When she saw him…well, the jury's still out of why she EVER found him attractive.

Mom's pestering me to take him to trial, and people on campus look at me funny; apparently I'm an incidental celebrity.

All this on top of my midterms. Best four years of my life, my ASS.

However, things aren't ALL so bad. I was informed by financial aid that since Geoff had overworked me so frequently (and in part to compensate for the whole, you know, sexual harassment thing) that they would go back over the books and pay me double-and-a-half for all my logged hours, which pretty much makes up for all the EXTRA hours Geoff made me work, with a little extra thrown in. They also let me cut back my hours to ten a week, and I have a new work supervisor (THANK GOD) who has informed me she pretty much doesn't care WHAT I do as long as it looks like I'm busy. So work has been, dare I say, almost tolerable these past few days.

However, there's the little matter of the Japanese twin team.

I kinda just noticed it, but they seem to have a weird competition going on to see who can annoy me the most. I thought that maybe, after this whole Geoff thing (what with them saving me and everything) that things might be a LITTLE different between us.

Oh, they're different, alright. NOT the kind of different I'm happy about.

So, this morning I woke up with my hands duct-taped together. Written on the tape (in very poor English lettering) were the words "Good Moring, Jana. See yu at brekfass, lov Hikaru." I had to bite through the tape to get free, and was late for my chem lab.

I had a chance to grind my knuckles into Hikaru for that little stunt during Host Club that afternoon, but Kaoru was ready and waiting. He nuggeted my backpack, (and for those of you who don't know what that is, then SHAME ON YOU.) which I don't think anyone has done to me since fifth grade.

By this point, I was pretty pissed at the both of them, but I got them back with my best prank, "Hey, does this ice cream smell funny to you? SPLAT!" Vanilla soft-serve up both their noses went a long way to making me feel better about myself.

Then, when I got into bed (where I am writing this right now) I felt something cold and slick against my bare feet. I spazzed out and threw back the covers…to discover a pile of ketchup packets at the bottom of my sheets. They all had kanji on them.

What the gay? These Japanese are so messed up. Honestly, I don't know what to do about them.

Oh, and even MORE important, there's Austin. I'm not sure what the problem is, but he's been acting kind of weird around me. Like, half the time it's like he likes me, and then half the time he pretends I don't exist. I'm getting pretty goddam sick of it.

Today at Host Club he touched my arm (!) as he passed my table (where I was seated with Jake yet again) and smiled. A really soft smile, sort of curly around his teeth and ALL FOR ME. Suck on that, hos!

But then he ignored me the rest of the day. Is he playing hard to get or something? Is he trying to be a mystery man, or maybe he's fluctuating between fear of commitment and his true feelings…

God, why are men so COMPLICATED?

Yikes, I hear the sing-song of Japanese voices, and a thump that surely is a fainting freshman. It would appear the Hitachiins are back on my hall.

-=+=-

The twins flung open Janae's door and burst into the room. "Get up, Janae-tan! Let's go!"

Janae groaned and pulled the covers over her head. "Ichi, don't call me that. Ni, NO. I don't wanna go anywhere with you."

"Aw, come on," whined Hikaru. "There's techno playing in the gym-"

"-and people bouncing around with glowsticks, and we want you to come," Kaoru finished.

This revelation made Janae sit up straight. "There's a rave in the gym? Alright, let me find my trance rags, and we'll go," she said with some interest.

Kaoru raised a hand. "Gomen, Janae, but what is "trance rags?"

Janae rolled off the bed and began rummaging in a pile of clothes on the floor. "Trance rags are clothes you would wear under blacklight that look cool while you're jumping around, jump around, jump up jump up and get down," she explained.

Hikaru glanced down at himself. "Are we wearing trance rags?"

Janae cast a critical eye at the boys. Per her opinions on what respectable college boys should wear, they were both clad in identical polo shirts and loose jeans. "You both look alright -thank goodness you dressed the way I told you to- but you're not quite blacklight material."

Kaoru's face became distressed. "I want to wear the trance rags! Can we have some, Janae?"

Her face lit up. "Are you asking me to dress you? Sweet!"

Hikaru smirked. "Careful, Janae, that sounds a little hentai to me."

She glared at him. "Shut it, Hikaru-cchi. Do you want to look cool for the girls, or not?"

Kaoru slapped a hand across Hikaru's mouth before he could say more. "Yes! Yes, we do!"

"Let me see what I have that you can wear, then."

-=+=-

After fifteen minutes of intense searching, I finally put together two outfits for them that, personally, I'm pretty proud of. Hikaru's wearing a black tank top with red daisy dukes and a grey beanie, and Kaoru is dressed in my tightest white tee with a green tank over it.

They seem a little uncomfortable; they keep tugging at the edges of their shirts, and Hikaru keeps covering his thighs. Epic hilarity factor.

"I thought you hated boys wearing girl clothes," Hikaru frowns at me.

"This is a rave. Anything goes." I twirl for them. "How do I look?"

In spite of myself, I actually feel pretty rad. I bought a black glow "I *heart* DJ" shirt off eBay a while back, which is super tight and accentuates all my best accentuaties, and a white denim miniskirt which completes the glow effect. I used my darkest kohl around my eyes, and then colored my lips with a white lipstick and then yellow highlighter. I cut off an old pair of fishnets and am wearing them like fingerless gloves. All in all, I feel SHMEXY, BITCH.

Karin comes into the room and squeals, "Oh my GOD, you look so CUTE. Let me take your picture!"

The boys seem eager to leave at this suggestion, but there's no way I'm letting them get out of this one after the ketchup packets. "Sure, Karin, we'd be OVERJOYED to have our picture taken." I hook an arm around both of their necks and pull them close. "Wouldn't we, boys?"

"Oww, be gentle with my neck," Hikaru groans on my right side. "I use it on occasion."

Kaoru winces on the left. "Hurry up and take the stupid picture."

"Okay, ready? Smiiiiiile," Karin chirps as she lifts my camera.

I smile, the boys don't.

"Come on," Karin pouts at them. "It's no fun if you don't smile."

Hikaru rolls his eyes, and opens his mouth to object, when I feel Kaoru reach around me with his spare arm and tap him lightly. "Mai waifu," Kaoru whispers to him.

Um, what?

Hikaru's face splits in a real smile. "Okay, Janae-tan, we'll make this a nice picture for you."

Oh, SHIT. Something's up.

"Karin, take the picture NOW," I urge her.

She lifts the camera, as the boys straighten up and wrap their arms around me, "Hai, Karin, take the picture!" They smile brightly.

I shrug to myself. Oh well, what's the worst they can do?

She puts her finger on the button. "Say Double D's!"

Then, as I smile at the camera, I feel them PLANT THEIR LIPS AGAINST MY CHEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-click-

Karin's face is slack. "Uhhhhhh…"

OH MY GIDDY GOD'S STRIPED TROUSERS, I WAS JUST ATTACKED.

"Get OFF of me, you weirdos," I sputter, pushing them away and turning so they can't see how hot my face is. "We're gonna miss the good stuff if we don't go soon."

THEY JUST KISSED ME. I've been VIOLATED.

"ByeKarinseeyoulatergottago," I babble, walking out of the room quickly. A very smug Hikaru and Kaoru follow behind me.

Karin stands rooted to the floor. She stares at the camera screen until the stunned face of Janae flashes away. "…that girl is so effing lucky."

-=+=-

The bass was so loud, it made Janae's teeth hum before she was even in the gym. She threw open the gym door and with relief folded into the warm crowd of jumping college students. Lights flashing, strobing, glow sticks flashing in the air and twirling around the gym, the blue-white of people's shirts, socks and teeth popping up in the always-moving black formless amalgamation of bodies. The song thumped and whined and blipped on and on and on into the colored darkness.

Hikaru and Kaoru squeezed and nudged through the sweaty masses together. "Where did she go?"

"What?" Hikaru leaned closer to Kaoru. "Say again!"

Kaoru put his face to his brother's and shouted in Japanese. "I said, where did she go?"

"I don't know if we'll be able to find her in all this," Hikaru shouted back.

Kaoru glanced over his brother's shoulder and saw two girls who had stopped dancing and were watching the twins expectantly, clutching each other for support. "We've got fans watching, Hikaru."

With a sigh, Hikaru switched roles into host mode. "Dance with me, Kaoru." He took his brother's hand and began to swing his hips to the beat.

Kaoru tried to back away but was pushed into Hikaru's body by the bouncing people surrounding them. "Ie, Hikaru, there are too many people here…"

Hikaru laughed. "No worries, Kaoru; shinpai shinaide. All that matters is…" and he placed his hands on Kaoru's hips. "…me…" and began to sway Kaoru.

-thump, thump-

The girls dropped to the floor, overcome with moe-ness. The boys grinned and began to worm through the crowd again, searching for Janae.

Kaoru's eyes shifted to the left. "Hey, Hikaru, I see her!"

Hikaru twisted. "Where?"

Kaoru grabbed his hand and tugged him through the tightly packed bodies. "Come on!"

The music pounded, the atmosphere was thick with sweat, and colored lights flashed everywhere, but Kaoru pulled Hikaru closer and closer to where he had spotted Janae.

Pushing past two guys flinging glowsticks, Kaoru laughed with relief as he clapped a hand on Janae's shoulder. "Janae-tan, you shouldn't run off."

Hikaru stepped in front of her. "Are you going to teach us to dance, or not?"

Janae did not answer. Her face was blank, her eyes dull.

"Hmm?" Hikaru snapped his fingers in front of her face. "Janae, you okay?"

No reply. Janae stared slackly through Hikaru. When he looked to Kaoru for help, Kaoru was also staring at something behind Hikaru.

"What's going on?" Hikaru turned to see what-

"Is that Griffiths? What the hell?"

"I-I…" Janae gulped. "I'm going to go now."

Hikaru swung back around to look at her. "Wait, Janae, it doesn't matter." He put an arm around her. "We can pretend it never- OW!"

With a howl, Hikaru tried in vain to pull his fingers from Janae's clenched fist. "Don't touch me," she snarled. "MEN are nothing but APE SCUM." She pushed Kaoru away and fled from the rave.

"W-wait, Janae!" Hikaru reached for her as she began to run.

Kaoru blocked him. "Don't," he said into Hikaru's ear. "Let her cool off before we try to help out."

"But she-"

Kaoru smiled sadly."…is a girl who prefers to deal with things herself. Let it be for tonight, please?"

Growling, Hikaru shut his eyes in frustration. "-she has our clothes and room keys and stuff back in her room, Kaoru."

Kaoru's words crashed around him. "Oh…yeah. Um." He looked up at his brother sheepishly. "We're gonna have to pick the lock again, aren't we?"

Hikaru sighed. "Yup."

-=+=-

Yeah, I felt stupid running away from the rave and the twins. But not half as stupid as I felt standing there watching Austin.

Grinding with Bridget Lomendd.

Not accidental, if his hands on her hips told me anything. Not undesired, if the looks on their faces were any indication.

That BITCH. How could he do this with HER? HOW COULD HE, after all he's put me through?

At least they were so busy together they didn't see me watching. Thank God for SMALL favors, I guess.

I feel empty. Stupid men.

Stupid Bridget.

Stupid me for liking stupid Austin in the first place.

Hmm, the twins left their stuff in the room. I'd better drag it all into the commons so they can get it.

-dragging-

I'm locking the door tonight. I didn't think I could want to see them any less than before, but I can apparently.

God, why? WHY is my life like this? WHY can't I catch a break?

Oh turdy turd turds. If I was the suicidey type, I'd gulp all my vitamin D tablets and hope to overdose. But I'm not.

So, I'm just going to fall asleep and try to forget this whole traumatic episode of my life.

G'night.

-=+=-

A/N: So, I had midterms two solid weeks. Then I literally slept through fall break weekend. Then I had ANOTHER week of midterms. So, yeah, so updatey. Sorry, [loyal?] readers. Hope I didn't make you stress out checking for new chapters (haha, yeah right) and if this ever happens again, I'll try to give warning. Thanks for sticking with me. I knew I loved you all for a reason. Kisses!