3....2....1...and LIFT-OFF! I'm only kidding. You're not witnessing a space shuttle launch at NASA. It's just Chapter 9 of 'Do you know...what you mean to me?' Now, you may be wondering why there are random dots in the title I just wrote and the title that you see when you're looking at the Hetalia fanfiction part of the site. I have a VERY good reason for this. won't let me put the dots in the middle. I tried it, they got rid of it, and ended up looking stupid. So I had to make a few changes. But, the title you see here is the real title, don't be fooled! Hey, I said DON'T! No, don't follow that stranger! He won't give you candy! Get away from him! Oh, and by the way, when Natalia is on the balcony, it's because the ballroom is on the 2nd floor of Francis' house...so there's a balcony outside. I apologize for the confusion. And now, on to the very uninteresting disclaimer (you know, you can skip it. No one is gonna blame you. Hell, not even the disclaimer minds...right? Oh, I think I hurt his feelings. Please read him to make him feel better).
DISCLAIMER - I DO NOT OWN AXIS POWERS HETALIA OR ITS CHARACTERS! Well, I do own any character I make up.
Chapter 9 - What's going to happen to me?
I look at Feliciano. His eyes are beginning to water. Oh no, I've really hurt him, again. I can't believe it! Feliciano turns away, and looks like he's crying. I feel...empty. I look at Toris. He hasn't noticed anything yet. I can't believe I'd lost control. Feliciano is not going to forgive me. Yeah, sure, we can be friends again, but...oh my God. I've hurt him far worse than Ludwig hurt him or Toris hurt me. I start crying again. The world around me fades away, fades into the darkness my heart resided in until I had truly met Feliciano. My heart is turning cold again, I can feel it in my chest. That familiar feeling of a frozen heart. I can't let that happen again. I have to come back into the light! I don't want the world to be dark again! It's cold and scary! Especially when you're alone.
"Lithuania. I'm sorry, but I love Italy." I say, wiping my eyes.
"Yeah, I know that. I can tell. You two are cute together." he smiles.
"But...I think I love you too." I look into his eyes. He's no longer hurt, he's...happy?
"R-really? After all those years of chasing after you, and then hurting you? You love me, too?" he asks. Is he...surprised?
"Yes. I don't know why, and I don't know how. I just do. I...can't believe I'm making a choice between my boyfriend and you. Not that there's anything wrong with you. It's just...I don't know. Italy has seen us and I don't think he's going to-" I'm interrupted by Toris.
"Wait...Italy saw us? He saw us kiss? Oh no! Belarus, I'm so sorry! I didn't know! I shouldn't have been so selfish! I know you two were a couple, but I couldn't help it! I've ruined it, haven't I? I'm so sorry!" he says meaning it.
"I-I need some air. I'm going to go outside for a minute." I say, walking away.
As I open the door to the balcony, the cold French air hit my face as realization sunk in. I've...cheated on my boyfriend...my best friend...I've hurt him more than I could ever imagine. I wipe away the tears that are falling from my cheeks, and I can hear lively music playing from the ballroom. Everyone was happy, apart from Feliciano. Stupid heart and mind, locked in a permanent battle for supremacy! I just wish...they could agree. I don't want this to be a constant battle ground! I'm...lonely. I just want a hug. Just one warm hug with the feeling of being loved again. The lovely feeling of walking with a vute Italian with the honey eyes. But...he won't take me back. I've hurt him. I might as well have killed him. Maybe that would have hurt less. I jump as someone pokes my shoulder. I turn around. Feliciano?
"Italy-kun! I-" and for the second time tonight, I'm interrupted.
"Save it. Look, I can't be with someone who is unfaithful. Bela-chan...I'm dumping you. But I still want to be friends, if you want us to be friends, after all. I wish you luck with Lithuania." his voice is cold. Colder than my own heart. I shiver.
"But, I don't want Lithuania! I want you! Please, don't do this!" I bet, looking into his eyes. I'm about to cry again.
"I'm sorry. but after what you and Germany did, I don't want a boyfriend or a girlfriend anymore. You...you're like Holy Roman Empire! Promise to be there and come back later, but you never did! You never do!" he shouts, then turns away and walks back inside.
My heart is freezing over. Back into the depths of darkness for me. Will the light ever shine again in my heart? Without Feliciano...I might as well say goodbye to the light. That beautiful thing that only came when Feliciano started visiting. But now...it's fading away. The darkness is wrapping its cold and twisted fingers around me right now, choking me. It's a short process, but it hurts...I need the light! I can't stay in the darkness, not again! I can't go back there! I don't want to! The reason I was there the first time is because of rejection, I can't let it happen again! The darkness is choking the light out of me, using my pain, suffering and misery for sustanance. I suppose I had fun being in the light. Time to return to darkness, where I belong. Where it's cold and lonely...is that...and arm around me? Who is it? I look at the mystery person. Toris. The darkness had stopped, but the light didn't come back. I'm stuck between light and darkness. What's going to happen to me?
Aaaand that's the end of Chapter 9! Hurray! I'm warning you now. In this story, Feliciano and Natalia don't get back together. In the sequel? That's a different story heehee. Oh, and I think the next chapter is the last one...oh no! I'm sorry! But, you will know if it's the sequel of this story. You will just need to read the summary. Anyway, I gotta start writing Chapter 10! See you guys later! ^.^ Oh, and keep on reviewin'! I could use ideas for the sequel!