WOW, my sincere apologies for such a long delay but god it's been a hectic few weeks, enjoy x

Meredith sat in the hospital foyer waiting for Derek to finish up with his patients. As she sat amongst the bussle of the hospital she could feel her hands becoming a little clammy, perhaps it was because she kept rubbing them together so vigorously. She didn't think she would be nervous about their dinner, they were friends, they could talk to one other, one thing for sure was they wouldn't fall into an uncomfortable silence, so why was she so nervous? On the one hand she felt like she was betraying Adam, her finace who lay unconcious in a hospital bed, who was no longer there for her. But this couldn't be considered as cheating, her and Derek were just friends after all, colleagues. She briefly checked her wrist watch for the time, Derek should be down any minute and on that thought her heart began to beat a little bit faster.

"Calm yourself Meredith...why are you being so stupid, it's just dinner for god's sake!"

She continued to try and calm herself until Derek turned the corner. He looked amazing, dressed in his casual dark denims and his blue shirt that highlighted his eyes perfectly. She could smell his aftershave as he got closer. He flashed her a McDreamy smile and her heart fluttered a little, "What the hell was that?" She couldn't deny his attractiveness, he was the talk of the hospital among the female staff and she could not understand how he was single! He approached her at a fast rate and she took one final deep breath before he reached her.

"Hey" he smiled again "You ready to go?"

Sliding his hands into the arms of his grey coat, he pulled it up over his shoulders, buttoning it up in preparation for the cold weather outside.

"Yeah...I'm starving" Meredith commented following suit, putting her jacket on also. He led her to the car park where he silver BMW sat parked in his usual spot. All the attendings had their own spots right outside the door, while residents and interns had to park what felt like miles from the hospital.

"So unfair" Meredith pouted as she walked towards the passenger side of the flashy car.

"What is?" Derek asked, retrieving his keys from his pocket and unlocking the car.

"How you always manage to get these spots outside the hospital door...we interns are in here every morning at four thiry for rounds and yet we still have to park half way across the lot!" Meredith didn't really realize how completely angry she sounded until Derek smirked a little. She sat herself into the car and Derek followed suit.

"I'm sorry...you can have my spot if it means that much to you" he winked.

"Okay...fine!" she was only half teasing with her answer. "So where are we going then?"

"It's a surprise" he smiled "Ever been on a ferry?"

Meredith actually had never been on a ferry, before Seattle she lived in Boston and never had need of a ferry. She wondered where they could possibly be going! Where there restaurants on ferries or what? She simply shook her head and once again Derek flashed a smile in her direction.

Surprisingly Meredith enjoyed the ferry ride over to Bainbridge, although it was intensely cold on deck she loved how the sea breeze felt against her face and knowing she was breathing in good healthy air instead of the foul, poisoned air of the city for once. The journey lasted about half an hour, it was quick and as Derek drove the car off the ferry she was back to speculating about their destination.

"So are you going to tell me where your taking me then?" Meredith questioned as she noticed the turn Derek took, taking a side road off the main street. He chuckled again enjoying watching her confused expressions.

"I told you...it's a surprise!" he explained again "Can't you just trust me"

Meredith suddenly wondered if she could trust Derek, afterall she had only known him a number of weeks, how was she to know he wasn't some psychopath who was kidknapping her! She brushed those thoughts to the back of her mind when she realised how insane she sounded.

"Fine" she pouted, rubbing her hands vigorously together in an attempt to warm them up from the cold. She had forgotten her warm gloves, she could picture them sitting back in her locker at the hospital and cursed her stupidity having known it was a bitterly cold night. Derek soon noticed her shivering and moved to crank up the heat and she smiled at him with gratitude. The road became more bumpy as they continued down the road which appeared to be getting narrower and narrower.

"We're almost there" he promised as the car began to slow down.

"Ugh...finally" she sighed with relief, the cold now becoming a little too much to bare, as was her growing curiosity. They were surrounded by towering trees and Meredith knew they had to be in the middle of nowhere. Her heart began to race as she considered the psychopath murderer theory again until Derek announced

"We're here"

Meredith couldn't see anything, they were clothed in blackness with nothing but the moon for light. She could just about make out the outlines of the pine trees as she continued to survey the landscape through the car window!

"You coming?" Derek asked as he opened his car door, a flashlight in his left hand which he immediately flicked on to illuminate his path.

Meredith did hesitate for a minute but then moved to get out of the car. Derek met her at the passanger side still holding the flashlight. He smiled at her reassuringly as he led her through, what she could only guess was, an open field!

"Seriously...where the hell are we?" she demanded following him and the light. Derek didn't answer, eventually stopping.

"I live here" he smiled and Meredith was more than confused now.

"You live where exactly?" she asked looking around her but it was no use she could see nothing in the dark. "You live in a field?" she laughed a little with the absurdity of her question, he couldn't possibly live in a field, could he?

"I live in that trailer" he suddenly flashed the dim light of the flashlight over the darkened trailer that sat in the middle of the field and then waited for her response. He had never shown anyone his home before, not because he was ashamed but because an opportunity never arose. He didn't really have friends in Seattle, he had the chief but that was it and the chief spent most of his days and hours buried under a pile of administration work for the hospital.

Meredith stared at the trailer infront of her. She didn't know what to make of it, was he joking or being serious? He was a hot shot neuro-surgeon, she always imagined that such a high profile surgeon such as Derek Shepherd would be living in a mansion of a house in the hamptons or somewhere, or have a pent-house in the city! Suddenly she realised how incredible it all was, how incredible he was. He wasn't like other surgeons, he was different, he lived in a fricked trailer! Her face lit up as she turned to him.

"It's AMAZING" she stated enthusiastically "I mean SERIOUSLY...you live here? in the wilderness?"

"I do" he smiled back "Shall we?" he motioned to take her arm and she accepted without hesitation having realised that Derek Shepherd was definitely one of a kind!

They sat talking for the night after Derek made them the most delicious meal Meredith had ever tasted, far better than any restaurant could have mustered up. Derek told her how he loved to fish and would go every morning before heading to the hospital hence why it was fish he made for dinner. Meredith wasn't really a fish eating person but to her surprise it was terrific. His trailer to her amazement was extremely warm and cosy, so homey, she had never felt more at home anywhere else before. The area was so peaceful and quiet, there was no sirens, traffic or anything like that to disturb them and she wondered how anyone could go back to living in the city after experiencing such tranquility.

"I bought this land when I first came to Seattle...I think it's a good investment...I want to be able to build a house here eventually, when I have a family of my own" he explained honestly.

"It's beautiful...I don't think Adam would ever live in such a serene place...he's more of a city person" Meredith stated as she continued to look out onto the lake that you could see from Derek's trailer.

"And you?" Derek questioned, becoming more and more mesmorized by her by the second.

"You know I thought I was a city girl...but after seeing this...I mean how could you not fall in love with this" she smiled, she was completely awe struck by it all.

"Maybe you can convince him...I'm sure he'd do anything for you" Derek found it hard to think Adam wouldn't do anything for this woman, if he loved her he'd want her to be happy and if that meant building a house in Bainsbridge, wouldn't he do that for her?

Meredith sighed deeply, a hint of uncertainty became apparent across her face.

"Maybe" she whispered and Derek's heart immediately sank. He watched how her posture suddenly deflated and the peacefulness she was momentarily experiencing was fading slowly. "I use to think he'd do anything for me but now I'm not so sure"

Derek wanted to question her further but waited for her to continue, if she wanted to tell him more she would but he wouldn't pressure her into doing so. He suddenly noticed a tear falling down her cheek and knew he at least needed to know if she was okay.

"Meredith...are you okay?" he asked sliding closer towards her on the sofa and resting his hand on hers. She simply nodded, smiling at him gratefully for asking.

"I'm sorry...I don't mean to be such a party pooper" she apologized wiping the escaping tears with her sleeve.

"Meredith you can talk to me...we're friends aren't we?" he smiled urging her to get whatever was on her chest out in the open. He knew something was haunting her and while he desperately wanted to find out more about the couples relationship it was more for her benefit that he wanted her to talk. Meredith paced herself taking a deep breath, she was going to tell Derek what she obviously needing to talk about.

"Ummmm...about a year ago...I got pregnant...it was completely unexpected of course" Derek noticed the way she was shaking as she told her story and he tightened his grip on her hand encouraging her to go on. "I always wanted to be a Mom...ever since I was eight years old going around the house with my baby doll under my arm...and even though it was completely unexpected I was happy...I told Adam the same day I found out and he...he just got so angry...so upset...we had a big fight, he wanted to know why I wasn't taking my birth control even though I was, I told him these things happen...anyway he stormed out, he left for three weeks, I didn't see or hear from him...I was a mess...a pregnant mess at that!

Derek was completely enthralled by her story and was listening intently to what she had to say next.

"He came back anyway...he apologised for what he did and told me he really was happy about the baby it was just a shock to him...so I forgave him and we got on with our lives, but two months later...I um...I miscarried" the tears once again began streaming from her green eyes and Derek wrapped his arms around her tightly."Me and Adam just haven't been the same since...I just think we're different people now and I feel he's staying with me out of obligation, I really don't think he loves me anymore"

"And do you love him?" Derek asked rubbing soothing circles around her back.

"I don't know...I mean I think so...this accident and seeing him lying in that bed unconscious...I mean I don't want to lose him...I don't want him to die" Her crying intensified and Derek pulled her closer "Shhhh....shhhh...it's okay"

He couldn't believe the revelation he had just heard and it got him thinking that maybe there was hope for him and her afterall!