Roxy sat on the front steps of the lodge as the sun rose. The scenery was quite different than on the Dutton ranch, but it was still beautiful to watch. She hadn't slept much and feeling like a stranger in Roarke's house she had opted to spend the rest of the early morning hours outside.
In the middle of the evening, she had returned to the cabin to clear out her things. She had suddenly felt like a stranger in her own home or even worse, like a pariah. She was running away again to preserve herself except this time it wasn't her choice, she was somehow forced to do it. She, unlike the first time she had fled, wanted to believe that it was temporary, just a question of a couple of days, maybe weeks, before everything blew over and everyone saw clearly again.
She lifted a carton box in her trunk and as she was ready to do the same with another one, someone handed it to her.
They eyed each other at first without talking. As she was about to close the trunk of the car, he placed his hand over hers.
"Roxanne, what are you doing?"
She sighed. "What I should have done months ago, Lloyd" she replied. "If I had left back then, this wouldn't be happening. Everyone's life would have just gone on without me and I wouldn't feel miserable with this old wound that has just reopened and is spewing hell on everyone on this ranch. I'm responsible for everything that is happening."
"You don't believe a word of that."
"Then tell me, what should I believe?"
"Believe in everything you've built here."
"Built? More like destroy, if you ask everyone around this ranch and my family."
"And they are wrong."
"You seem to be the only one to believe that."
She lowered her head and shook it. "Nothing is going the way it should. I should be preparing to get married and instead, I'm packing up my things and leaving."
"Let me talk to Ryan."
"Lloyd, I appreciate it, but I doubt that there is anything you'll be able to say that will make Ryan change his mind and I don't want him to end up marrying me by obligation and then regret it later."
Lloyd inhaled and exhaled, he understood her point of view, but he was also almost certain that Ryan had reacted in the heat of the moment and that he would realize that he had made a huge mistake.
"Where are you going?"
"I'm staying at my practice for the time being. At least I can make the necessary arrangements to head back to Cheyenne and go back to the life I had there."
"Look, I know you've never needed anyone telling you what to do, all I ask of you is to stick around a little bit longer. Give everyone time to digest what has happened."
"I'll think about it, Lloyd, but that doesn't mean that I'll do it. Staying here, is painful and I don't need that."
He took her into his arms for a quick hug. "My sweet Roxanne, if life wasn't painful, it wouldn't be worth living and I'd have given up on it a long time ago. Take care of yourself."
They broke the embrace and she smiled at him. "I will. You take care of yourself too, old man."
He had watched as she had gotten in her car and driven away. He had wanted to see 'see you soon' but he wasn't sure it would be the case and he found that so hard to believe.
"I wasn't expecting my house guest to be up at the crack of dawn," she heard Roarke's voice coming from behind her.
She shifted her head and saw him standing behind her barefoot, in a pair of jeans and white t-shirt.
"Did I wake you?"
He passed her side, stepped out on the pebbled front of the house, turned, and looked at her sitting on his doorstep.
"No. But I would have gotten up earlier, if I had known."
"You don't have to do that. Just because I have insomnia doesn't mean that you need to deprive yourself of sleep."
"I've been awake for hours. I just didn't want to start doing things around the house and wake you up."
She laughed. "I guess we need to communicate better."
"Or sleep in the same bed."
She eyed him and he grimaced. "Seriously? You're still hoping that Anderson is going to come around and you want to make sure that you didn't cheat on him."
"I don't know what I'm hoping for, Roarke. All I know is that I was to be married, that's got to count for something."
"Exactly, you were to be married. He broke off the engagement and called off the wedding, not the other way around."
He eyed her for a few seconds. "Look, I know men like him, if you really think that he's going to sit and wait more than a week to replace you in his bed sheets, you're naïve. Don't plan a life of celibacy because you think he will… it'll be a waste of some damn good sex, whoever the guy is."
"Even if I listen to what you say, what makes you think that you'd be the first guy to get me in bed after Ryan?"
"Because I know you're not indifferent to my charm and good looks," he replied giving her the most handsome of his smiles. "And there is no better way than to get over a heartache than by having sex with a good-looking, irresistible stranger."
"Good looking and irresistible stranger? You're not a stranger. Up until not so long ago you were the enemy. Remember?"
"I thought we had buried the hatchet?"
"You still need to prove that I can trust you, like I said right now you're the lesser of two evils."
"Then tell me how to win your trust," replied Roarke as he softened his stare on her.
"Help me in finding out if it is Market Equities who is behind all of this."
"I already told you I would, but it might take some time. The guy they usually call for this kind of stuff is not easy to get a hold off and only Caroline has an open line toward this guy."
"Then how do you plan on getting his information?"
"I still have some people that I can call a favor in to, people who owe me big."
"Okay." She didn't know what else to answer. She didn't want to pressure him as getting his help was already something important.
He walked up to her, placed his feet almost against hers and put his hands out for her to take.
"I don't know about you, but I'm hungry. Breakfast?"
She nodded and even though she didn't want to, she naturally placed her hands in his and let him lift her from off the ground.
Their eyes connected as she reached his height. "You know what would make any man rethink his actions?"
She shook her head knowing he was talking about Ryan.
"Jealousy. Show a man you've moved on, that another man is honored to be in your life and chances are that he'll come back begging."
"Roarke, no one can know I'm here. Part of the reason this plan is going to work is because no one will know you are helping me. If they do, Caroline will make sure that this plan goes under before I can even put it into play."
"Let me be clear about one thing. I'm doing this to help you, because I truly think that what they did to you was awful, but in no way am I going to worry about what Anderson, or your family, is going to get out of this. They don't deserve what you are doing to salvage what little they have left!"
He walked inside the house, apparently angry.
"Whoa, talk about an attitude change. What did I do?" she asked as she followed him down the corridor.
He whipped around. "You are holding on to something that is already gone, Doc. You are setting yourself up for a much harder fall if you think that what you are going to do is going to undo everything they have done."
His eyes suddenly dropped, and he eyed her from head to toe. She was wearing a white tank top and black sleeping shorts. "And do me a favor, get dressed."
She shook her head. "I'm sorry? I am dressed."
"No, you're not."
"Says, the guy who does yoga naked. What's it to you?"
Just as he had the first time she had come into his home; he felt his emotions on high alert as he couldn't take his eyes off her body. He pinned her against the wall, placing both his hands on each side of her, blocking her.
"You have no idea what you do to men, do you, Doc?" his beautiful green eyes fixed on hers.
The way they did was unsettling. Unable to speak, she simply shook her head.
"Last time you were dressed, and I already had a hard time keeping my ardor under wraps. Here, your tank top enhances your breasts and as you're not wearing a bra your hardening nipples show through the fabric. As for your shorts, they cup your butt cheeks so beautifully that there is no room for doubt as to what they are like without them on. I'm currently fighting every maddening pulse coming my way, telling me to rip those off your body and possess you entirely. I've wanted you since day one, Doc, in your practice when you took care of my hand. I will not take advantage of you or make you do things you don't want to do; so, for my own fucking sanity, please get dressed!"
As he removed his hands, before removing his body from against hers, she felt how hard he was, and she wondered if coming here had been a bad idea or not.
As he started to walk away, he stopped short of the arch leading into the living room and dining room.
"That is why Beth hates you. Because she knows the affect you have on men, Rip Wheeler included. She hates you even more because for you it's natural, and she has to work for it!"