CHAPTER TEN
Friday night at a club was a lot better than Monday night at a bar.
The music was loud, the place reeked of lust and booze and the lighting made you want to either dance or take off your clothes. Maybe both. Buffy and Faith fell in there around eleven and the rest of the motley crew came about an hour later. At about two in the morning everyone was drunk, laughing, and having a good time. They had about another two hours before the club closed, and it seemed like none of them were planning on leaving a minute before.
Buffy, Faith, Willow, Kennedy, Xander, and Dawn sat around on the couches near the back, watching the other slayers run around and make fools of themselves in good fun. Giles and Andrew opted not to come, and neither did Robin. He actually hadn't been around that much, and Faith thinks it's partly her fault. She fucked the dude than basically ignored him, and he didn't seem like the type to really screw and leave.
"Someone tell me I'm not contributing to underage drinking," Buffy says with a bit of a groan as she's sprawled out on the couch, one leg draped over Faith's (which Faith tried to not think extensively about), as she watched all the Slayers. "I'll be able to sleep better tonight."
Dawn make's a guilty face and puts hers down. Kennedy, on the other hand, takes an overdramatic sip.
"Lighten up, B," Faith says, shoving her lightly. "If the kids got a way to get it, I say more power to them."
"I'd like to know where they all got their bracelets that show they're over twenty one," Xander says, then looks pointedly at Dawn, who slinks lower in her chair. But Xander isn't lecturing her; he seems more in awe of it than anything else.
"Found it?" she offers with a shrug, which doesn't sound like the truth even a little bit. Faith smirks and holds up her fist to Dawn, who bumps it. Buffy grabs her arm and puts it back down, her fingers lingering on it probably a bit more than they should. Faith tries not to notice that everyone else was looking at Buffy's behavior towards her curiously.
"You're a bad enough influence on her," she says, to which Faith merely shrugs. Hey, she never asked to be anyone's role model, or for people to follow her awesome ways.
"Come on," Kennedy says, getting up and taking Willow's hand with a smile, "Let's dance."
"I don't know," Willow says, looking at the dance floor. "Me and the feet? We don't get along so well. Stumbling is usually involved." But Kennedy just rolls her eyes at her playfully and pulls, helping her up.
"I'll catch you if you fall," she tells her with a loving smile before she leads her onto the dance floor. As Faith watches them leave, Buffy pokes her in the arm.
"You haven't asked me to dance yet, you know," she says pointedly.
"What am I? You're boyfriend now?" Faith jokes with a laugh, taking a sip of her drink. The way Buffy just said that completely sounded like she was her nagging girlfriend who was upset because she wasn't getting enough attention paid to her.
"You know, normally I'd ask if there was something you've been keeping from me if you think of yourself as a 'boyfriend'," Buffy laughs, and then her eyes land very much between Faith's legs. "But I already know that isn't true." Her eyes sweep up her body to land on hers.
Yeah, Buffy was a little drunk. That much was clear.
"Oh ew!" Dawn exclaims suddenly, looking at the two of them and taking that in completely the wrong way. "You two actually had sex?! I didn't need to know that!"
"What?!" Buffy exclaims, but Dawn's already up and holding her hands over her ears going 'la la la la' as she tries to get away from something that's probably gonna scar her for the rest of her life. "I didn't mean…! Dawn!" But she's gone, and all that's left is Xander who's staring at them like they have two heads. Well, okay, four heads, between them.
"I don't want to know," he says, standing up before he walks away. Buffy tries to protest, but it falls on deaf ears, until all that's left is the two of them. Faith can't do anything else but laugh. She's pretty sure the only reason Xander doesn't want to know is so he's not tempted to wack off to the thought.
"Oh shut up," Buffy says, shoving her hard in annoyance once they're alone. "Now everyone is gonna think I'm sleeping with you." She slumps in her seat and pouts, and it makes Faith giggle. It didn't matter what it was about; Buffy was adorable when she pouted.
Alright, she didn't just use the word adorable. That's completely not in her vocabulary.
"There are worse things."
"Says you."
"Oh, ouch," Faith says, holding her hand to her chest dramatically. But Buffy's still pouting, so she stands up, holding her hand out to her, trying to cheer her up a little. "May I have this dance?" she asks with a stupid (and probably drunk) looking grin on her face. And yeah, maybe it was cheesy, but hey, if the girl says she wants to dance…
"Now you're just mocking me," Buffy says, folding her arms across her chest and making a face filled with grumpiness. Faith holds up her hands in surrender.
"Hey, you said you wanted to dance. Excuse me for trying, girlfriend."
Buffy narrows her eyes, as if studying her to detect a lie, but then her eyes widen and Faith feels a tap on her shoulder. She turns around to come face to face with a man. A very good looking man, if she's to be honest.
"Hey, can I buy you a drink?" he asks with his suave little smile in his expensive looking suit and nicely shaven goatee.
"Back off," Buffy snaps suddenly, and his eyes widen. So do Faith's. And even though she's not turned around to see it, she's pretty sure Buffy's just did too.
"Sorry, I didn't know you were with…" he trails off. "Sorry," he says again, backing away. Faith whips around, confusement all over her face.
"When did we start doing the territorial thing?" Faith asks, just trying to find something to say. "I missed that memo."
"I just… he was just…" Buffy starts, trying to find something to say to defend herself. She waves her hands in the air all crazy-like. "You could do better than him," she finishes, lamely. Faith just stares at her.
Buffy rolls her eyes, like Faith should just let it go, and takes Faith's hand, pulling her down to sit next to her. "I think I'm a little drunk," she admits, and Faith's bound to agree on that point at least. "Whatever. Things are spinning a bit, and so you should be here with me and not with Mr. Goatee," Buffy says, and moves to lie down so her head is in Faith's lap. Faith can do nothing else but just look down at her. What is she doing?
"Stop," Buffy says, and hits her chin lightly with her hand. Faith looks disgruntled at that. "Stop thinking. I hate when you do that."
"You hate when I think?" Faith asks, cocking an eyebrow.
"Yes."
"Well sorry, then. Let me just lay here like a vegetable for you," Faith deadpans, but Buffy rolls her eyes.
"That's not what I meant," she responds, and she takes one of Faith's hands to drape around her torso. Faith makes every effort not to react to that in any way, shape or form, because she's starting to think that's what Buffy's talking about.
She has the urge to pinch herself to see if she's dreaming, but that'd just end up looking wicked retarded.
Instead she just goes with it. What else can she do? She feels a bit bad, like maybe she's taking advantage of Buffy because she's drunk, but Buffy's the one encouraging… whatever this is. Not like it's gotten to any kind of level that they need to raise alarm bells about. She lets her fingers softly trace patterns on the skin of Buffy's midriff that's exposed, just trying to let go of thinking.
Best way to do that though is to drink, so she picks up her glass. It's time to get hammered.
"You ever wonder what it would be like if we were never slayers? That we just grew up normal, both of us, together, in a normal high school somewhere?" Buffy asks as she looks up at her.
Faith shrugs. "Never gave it much thought," she says honestly. "Though I'm sure if we did, we'd never hang out together."
"Why do you say that?"
"B," Faith says flatly, stopping the movement of her fingers. "Look at you and look at me. We're cut from different cloths, sweetheart. Ain't no way we'd ever be besties."
"Hey, you don't know that," Buffy says, sitting up a little, which then practically made her on top of Faith, leaning over her. "I would have hung out with you."
Faith snorts, "Whatever. Maybe if you were looking for drugs. I know how I look to everyone else. And I also know you were little-ms.-popular back before you became a slayer."
Buffy makes a face, then slumps her shoulders, relenting. "Fine," she says, and lies back down in Faith's lap. She points up at her, determined, "But I totally would have hung out with you in college." Faith just laughs, amused at her persistence. She'll let her have that one. For now.
Faith found that her fingers started running through Buffy's hair of their own accord as Buffy turns her head to the side so she can take another sip of her drink, like she actually needed more alcohol or something. But it didn't matter, them being drunk didn't really matter because it let them let down the walls they usually hold up so high and guard so protectively. After Buffy puts her drink back down she looks at Faith and smiles a little, and her hand finds the one that's resting on her midriff. She doesn't hold it, but she lays hers on top, and her thumb was definitely stroking the top of hers a little.
Faith brushes a piece of blonde hair off of her forehead, letting her fingers linger on her skin for a little. Buffy purses her lips and looks down for a minute, before her eyes find hers again. "Does it always feel this way for you?" she asks her suddenly. Quiet, but loud enough for her to hear over the music. Loud enough that the question seemed to be ringing in her ears, but not because of the decibel.
"What?" Faith asks cautiously, but she can feel her heart speed up against her will by the way Buffy was looking at her. Buffy shrugs a little, then takes her hand and runs it right over Faith's skin, hovering over it about an inch. Faith could feel her even though she wasn't touching her, but that was nothing new for her.
"This. The connection," Buffy says as she tests it out more, running her hand up as it hovers over Faith's arm. "You've always seemed to feel more than me. You were always more in touch with it than I was," she tells her as she watches her hand go up further, up her neck, and over to brush her lips. The tingles shot all the way through her, deep into her bloodstream.
"B," Faith says quickly, moving her head away and blinking heavily at that feeling. "Don't do that."
But Buffy looks more intrigued by her reaction, and as she lets her hand fall, she does it slowly… all the way down her chest. Faith jumps up, practically throwing Buffy off of her. "I said don't!" Faith says, a little more forcefully this time and she looks down at her. Shivers were running down her spine and her hairs stood on end. Yeah, this was different. She could feel her, but it was so much more this time.
"Sorry," Buffy says automatically, sitting up. "I didn't mean—"
"This isn't some kind of game for me, Buffy!" Faith exclaims, standing up. She's upset all of a sudden, just out of nowhere, and she doesn't know how to get a handle of it. "This all might be some kind of fun experiment for you but I really don't need you fuckin' playing with me right now."
"Faith…"
But Faith turns and walks away, just needing to get some breathing room. She makes her way out the side door and into the alleyway, finding a place against the brick wall to lean as she digs in her pockets for her cigarettes. She's not surprised when the door opens not a minute after her and Buffy comes out, right when she's lighting it.
"I wish you wouldn't do that," she says, meaning smoking, as she makes her way over to her, hands in her pockets. Faith just shrugs, really not caring what she wishes right at that moment.
The cool night air makes the leaves on the trees tremble and both girls shiver. Buffy wraps her arms around herself, but doesn't complain about it. She looks up at her and tries, "Look, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking…"
"You never think," Faith mumbles as she takes a drag of her cigarette, letting the white stream of smoke fall from her lips quickly.
"I keep forgetting you like women," Buffy says, just trying to make it better. She holds herself tighter in the cool night air. "I just… don't think. I guess. I'm really sorry," she says, and it sounds genuine, so Faith's eyes flicker to hers for a moment. She flicks her cigarette ash and just looks at her for awhile, before she sighs and throws her cigarette on the ground.
"Let's go inside, you're freezing."
"No," Buffy says, stepping closer to her. "We can talk out here. In there it's all loud and… drunk. I don't know," she says, then nods a bit at her. "Just let me… in your coat."
Faith chuckles a little but unzips her coat and holds it open for Buffy, who takes another step before leaning completely against her chest, letting Faith wrap her coat around her. Faith can feel Buffy slightly shiver again, so she holds her tighter, trying not to think about the intoxicating smell that was the older girl. "So talk," Faith says in a low voice as she buries her face in her hair, telling herself it was to keep her face away from the breeze.
But Buffy doesn't say anything. Faith can feel her hand rest lightly on her hip, half on her belt and half on her exposed skin that her shirt gave her from riding up a bit with her arms being around the other woman. Buffy presses into her more, making Faith close her eyes and decide that talking would suck right now anyway because it'd probably ruin the most perfect moment she's ever had with Buffy in her entire life.
She can hear the low thumping of the music inside, but all she's focused on is the sound of Buffy's breath near her ear. It's picked up slightly, and Faith feels her run her fingers up Faith's shirt. It's slow, agonizingly and painfully slow, and it makes Faith close her eyes from the feeling. "Is it always like this with you?" Buffy asks, this time in a whisper, and meaning so much more than just the connection.
Faith has no idea how the hell she's managing to still breathe. Buffy brushes her lips across her neck, and Faith tries not to gasp at that as she tells her quietly, "Every day…" She closes her eyes shut tighter, wishing that didn't just come out of her mouth. But Buffy's fingers are now running back down her stomach softly, and her breathing is a bit hitched as she presses herself deeper into her, letting her lips fall to her neck for just a moment.
"B…" Faith manages to get out, not understanding what she's doing and least of all why right now.
"Sorry," Buffy says quietly, backing off a little, but still leaning herself against the younger slayer. "I think I'm drunk…" she manages softly, as she lifts her head up to look up at Faith. They lock eyes and Faith licks her bottom lip a bit nervously, which makes Buffy's gaze drop to watch. Faith can see her breathing has picked up; she can see her chest rise and fall and yet that in no way prepared her for what was coming next.
Faith has no idea when Buffy moved, but all of a sudden her lips brushed hers softly, making Faith close her eyes again and let out a tiny breath she didn't know she'd been holding. It was hesitant, almost testing, and when Faith opens her eyes to look at Buffy, they're only a breath apart. "I can feel it," Buffy whispers, the breath falling from her lips dancing across Faith's sensitive flesh. "You, everything. It's never been like this… it's like…" she stops, trying to find the words. As she does, her hand slides a little further up Faith's shirt, over the base of her ribcage, making Faith inhale sharply. "It's like we're one person… I don't know…" she trails off, and Faith is breathless as she waits for her to make her move, because she sure as hell is too frozen to do anything herself.
She's still half convinced this is a dream.
Emotions flicker across Buffy's face as she's silent for a moment, before the words Faith is torn between not knowing if she ever wanted to hear or glad that she did, comes out of her mouth. "…How long have you loved me?" Buffy asks softly, looking at her with more vulnerability than Faith has ever seen on her.
But it terrified her. It terrified her to realize that Buffy knew. It opened a whole new set of doors and instated brand new rules that she just didn't know how to follow. And when she's scared, she does what her first instinct is. "B, I can't do this," Faith gasps out, pushing her away from her a little, just needing room to breathe. But Buffy can't handle her not answering that question, can't handle her trying to run away, so she grabs onto her, stilling her, then backs her up against the wall again, her body pressed tightly against her.
"I need to know!" Buffy tells her, a bit desperately as she looks her in the eyes, yanking on her shirt for effect. "Just… damnit," she says, half in defeat as she looks at her, "Faith. Please…"
But she doesn't end up giving her a chance to answer, because all of a sudden her lips are on hers, and Faith is drowning in the feeling. Her eyes close and instinct takes over as she pulls her closer, running her hand up the back of her shirt, just needing to feel her skin. Buffy opens her mouth, emitting a quiet moan that tickles Faith's bottom lip, allowing her to slide her tongue in and dance with hers.
It was so much like a dream, but also harsh like reality as Buffy's fingernails rake down her ribcage before she holds onto her. "Tell me," Buffy whispered, breathless between kisses, her voice coming out rushed and desperate, "Just tell me…"
"Forever," Faith gasps out before her lips collide with hers again, turning them around so Buffy's the one pressed against the wall before her lips fall to her neck, making Buffy moan softly and grab onto her back as she closes her eyes, pressing her breasts into hers. Faith lets her lips find her throat, then her shoulder, back to her neck before they meet hers again, panting slightly against Buffy's lips.
Her hand slides up Buffy's shirt, but Buffy grabs a hold of it before it reaches its destination and laces their fingers together, raising their arms up so it's over her head. "Not here," she whispers against her lips, before kissing her softly. "Not in some dirty alley…"
Faith's breathless as she nods, leaning in to kiss her once more before she leans her forehead against hers, closing her eyes. It was almost too much for her to handle, and she felt like her heart was about to pound its way out of her chest. "Not when you're drunk," Faith adds in a whisper. "Fuck," she says, and gets off of her then, realizing something.
Buffy looks at her confused as Faith steps back and runs her fingers through her hair, her hands shaking slightly. "You're drunk," she says, though it's mostly to herself than to Buffy.
"Faith…"
But Faith's doubts are flowing through her mind again, completely without remorse, and it's making her chest tighten. Buffy's drunk. She's just drunk. That's all this really was. If Buffy was in her right mind this would have never happened. This was just some fake bullshit as a result of the alcohol and fuck, it was tearing her to shreds inside.
"Faith!"
But it's distant now, and Faith realizes she's running, and no matter how badly she wants to stop herself, she finds that she can't.
TBC…