I've had a couple of questions coming up over and over, so I thought I'd address them here: If it happens in the future… I don't know. Won't know until I write it. I don't plan ahead. Yes, Alice knows. She's happy. No, Edward doesn't know. She's keeping it from him. Yes, Alice and Jasper are still together at this point and Bella and Jasper are just friends (so far…)

PS. This is the chapter I used for the one-shot lemon, but don't get your hopes up, girls; that's what the one-shot's for…

I don't own it, I just play with it. Thanks Steph…

Hiking with Jasper was incredible. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before. I stumbled frequently, but true to his word, he never let me fall. I never felt worried, embarrassed, or anxious about not going fast enough. Jasper took all of that away and all I felt was relaxed and content.

The two of us really enjoyed our time together. Neither of us were in a hurry; we had no destination in mind. He took the time to point out and name the various plants and living creatures as we went along, and I found his interest and enthusiasm catching. He had been around long enough to be able to identify anything and everything, and I made a game out of testing his knowledge.

As we walked, we talked, getting to know each other. I realized just how little I knew about him and his past. When he shared the details of his change with me, I was saddened, but also impressed with how far he had come since. Something he stubbornly refused to see.

We talked about books, music, life in general, and nothing in particular. It was comfortable and nice. It was easy to see after a very short time that we would be very good friends, now that there was no one to stop us.

As these thoughts occurred to me I was happy, but I stopped in my tracks as I found myself suddenly filled with anger.

"Bella?" Jasper inquired, looking confused "You're angry. What's wrong?"

"Why would they do that to us, Jasper?" I asked, my anger warring with sadness and disappointment as I mourned what I had missed. "Why would they keep us apart?"

"Bella?" he asked, not able to understand my tumult of emotion.

"We could have been friends all this time – should have been friends, and they kept you away from me. It's not fair, Jasper!" I practically shouted at him in my anger. "They shouldn't have done that. They had no right." My words were reduced to a near whisper as I looked to the forest floor for answers I wouldn't find.

"They were looking out for your best interests, Bella. I'm not safe for you." He looked so ashamed it broke my heart.

"You won't hurt me, Jasper." I assured him, though I knew he didn't believe me. I took a step closer, facing him and keeping his hand. "Jasper… I know you don't want to believe this, but you've come a long way since those early days.

"You've made so many good choices since, and you're not the person you were then. As soon as you knew there was another way you took it. You have to let go of your past, Jasper. Eternity is a long time to live with regret.

"I trust you, Jasper. If they had let you be near me sooner, what happened on my birthday may have never happened. It would have gotten easier to be around me." He looked down at my mention of my party and my heart broke for him.

"Jasper… look at me." I placed my hand on his face as I had last night and he leaned into it just as naturally as he had before, covering my hand with his own. "Let me ask you something."

"Yes?" He spoke quietly, eyes closed, his face still leaning against my hand as he let my absolute trust and genuine admiration wash away his self-loathing, shame, and doubt.

"Is it any easier today?" I questioned, searching his face for understanding. "Is it easier to be near me than yesterday?"

He leaned into me, keeping my hands, one holding his, one on his face, and buried his nose in my neck. Inhaling deeply, but slowly, he buried his face in my hair and took in my scent. I almost wanted to stop him; I knew it was hurting him, but I had to let him see that he could do this. And I needed him to see that I wasn't afraid of him.

"It's easier." He murmured softly against my skin. His words filled me with satisfaction.

"You won't hurt me, Jasper." I told him. As he began to pull away to look at me I held onto him, letting go of his hand, removing the one from his face, and wrapping my arms around him in a huge hug. I held tightly, knowing he could break away if he wanted to, but hoping he wouldn't.

He froze instantly, but eventually relaxed against me, wrapping his arms loosely around me and resting his chin on my head as I tucked myself into him. "Don't be afraid, Jasper." I told him, softly. "I'm not. I want to be your friend… if you'll let me."

"I would like that, Bella." He told me, releasing me, but keeping my hand. He smiled and met my eyes as he continued "That was amazingly pleasant, you know – the warmth. And it was easier than I thought it would be."

"It'll only get easier after this." I assured him. "I'm just sorry that it hurts you. If it ever gets to be too much, you just tell me, okay?" He nodded, his proud smile only growing wider.

"I'm so angry at them for what they've done to you, Jasper." He looked confused, but didn't respond otherwise. "They've made you believe the worst of yourself. I don't know that I can ever forgive them for that."

He hung his head in shame and I wanted to strangle all of them. "Jasper. You. Are. Good." I told him, yet again. "You're stronger than you think, and you're going to have to learn to see yourself more clearly."

Jasper didn't say anything; he merely tugged my hand and continued walking again. I could tell he was considering my words, so I let the quiet wrap around us comfortably. It was only ten minutes later when we reached it.

Breaking through the trees, I saw the most beautiful sight I had ever seen in my life. The trees cleared slightly to make a separate area that didn't depend on the seldom existent sun for its beauty. Japanese style terraced cedar steps led down an irregular path to a small creek which fed a small pool before continuing its way down a winding path.

Rocks had been collected to line the creek and pool as well as to provide seating, and the plants had been allowed to grow, but not to take over, bathing everything in green. It looked as if it might have been there for a thousand years. The forest had accepted this place as its own.

"My special place." Jasper murmured when I drew in a jagged breath at the pure beauty of it.

"Jasper…" I whispered. Words would not find me. They could never describe the magic of this place. "It's beautiful."

"I come here to be alone. No one else comes here."

"You just brought me…"

"It's nice to have a friend." He told me. He ushered me to a group of boulders and encouraged me to sit and rest. Perching himself next to me on the largest of them, he sighed. "It's hard, you know - feeling everyone's emotions all the time. It's a lot to take in. It's nice to be by myself sometimes and feel what I feel without interference."

I began to feel like I was intruding on something that was special to Jasper. Sensing this, he turned to face me. "It's refreshing to be around you. You're not intruding. I brought you here.

"So you've never brought anyone here?" I asked him.

"I've brought Alice once or twice, but she'd rather be shopping." He shrugged, seemingly unaffected, but I didn't miss the pain, rejection, and loneliness in his statement at the fact that he had no one to share this with. He did now, though – he had me.

"Thank you, Jasper… for bringing me here."

We sat for a long time, listening to the forest before he spoke again. "I don't see myself clearly." He challenged, his eyes still lingering in the depths of the forest.

"No. I don't think anyone sees you clearly, Jasper."

"So, tell me."

"In your past, you did things – things you weren't proud of. The fact that you're not proud of them in itself shows that you're not as bad as you think you are." I began. I was glad to see that he wasn't going to argue… at least not right away. He was listening.

"I know you think so, but you didn't have a choice back then. You didn't know there was any other way to live. And I know what you're thinking, but it doesn't matter if you enjoyed it or not. Maria was your creator; your only source of reference for how things worked. You worshiped her and trusted her. If she told you to enjoy it, you did.

"Even then you were unhappy. As soon as you found a way out of the fighting, you left that life behind. That's a hard and scary thing for a vampire to do, suddenly changing everything. The fighting, the wars were gone, but living at the expense of others you were still unhappy. Can't you see how that says something about you?

"And when you found another way to live you committed to it and you've stuck to it ever since. No matter how hard it's been for you and no matter what they have done to convince you you're weaker, you still stuck to it.

"Jasper, you could have given in so many times, but you haven't. You've never given up. You take the fact that you still sometimes have the impulse to mean you're weak, but don't you see? The fact that you still resist each time despite the impulse means you're strong.

"I'd have done the same, you know." I told him and his eyes locked on me in interest, surprise, and confusion. "If I were turned the way you were I would have worshiped Maria and done what she told me to do. I would have fought wars and fed on humans. I'd have killed the newborns. I'd have been miserable and I'd have found a way out and taken it.

"When I found out there was another way to live, I'd have tried my damndest to live it and despite my pain, despite my mistakes I would have kept trying because I would have known there was no other choice." I placed my hand in his, staring deeply into his eyes; a challenge of sorts. "Would you have thought poorly of me, Jasper? Would I not have been worthy of your friendship or love?"

Silently, he looked down. It seemed as if he was trying to take in what I was trying to explain, but it was almost as if it were in a foreign language.

"You really don't see it, do you?"

"What?"

"How strong and how good you are."

"No." he whispered.

"I don't know you that well… or at least I didn't before now, but Jasper, even I can see how good you are. I'm angry and sad at all the time we missed, but I'm proud to know you now and prouder still that you'll have me for a friend.

"Hmmm…" he considered a moment. "I'll make you a deal."

"What deal?" I asked, a little curious and a little on edge.

"I'm willing to consider that you may be right. No one's ever put it that way before and it sounds… logical, I guess. I'll try to see myself more clearly and I'll try to trust your assessment of me – IF"

"Uh oh. I was all excited and proud until you added the 'if'."

"That's what makes if a deal… IF you'll do the same."

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.

"I'm not the only one who doesn't see myself clearly."

"I haven't heard that one before…" I hedged.

"Has it occurred to you that you continue to hear it because it's true?"

"Okay…" I conceded, though not gracefully. "So, tell me."

"You think you're clumsy, uninteresting, and plain." He stated matter-of-factly.

"Yes. But that's because I am."

"I am willing to consider that I believe myself weak because they tell me I am, but you must consider the idea that you are not as clumsy and accident prone as you believe yourself to be. Some of it may be normal and some may be that you've been told you're clumsy all your life."

"But I am-"

"No arguing. If you've been told that all your life, it's what you've come to pay attention to. You have to let me show you. Deal?"

"This doesn't sound good."

"Deal?"

"Okay, fine. But if I end up in the hospital…"

"No negativity. Now you have to try to see yourself the way I do."

"Okay… I'll try." I agreed, skeptically.

"You are wonderful, Bella. You're smart and fun, fiercely loyal, you're selfless and strong – probably the strongest person I know – you're brave and forgiving. I love your taste in books and music, you're a good listener and a good friend, and you're fun to be around. And Bella, you're not going to like to hear this, but…" he swept my hair from my face and captured my gaze "you're absolutely beautiful. You're the opposite of ordinary."

I stared into his earnest gold eyes in wonder. What he was telling me was hard to believe, but how could I doubt him when I could feel the admiration behind his words. I didn't move or speak; I just sat there looking at him for a long time.

"Bella?"

"I'll try." I promised.

"Then I'll try, too." He pledged.

"That's all I ask."

Awww. They're so sweet… Don't you just want them to kiss already? Me too, but they can't. Not yet. At least they won the one shot poll though, so they get together somehow… Do we like the 'lovey-dovey secret place go for a walk' Bella and Jasper???