Hey!

*gasp* I've updated! Thanks loads all of the reviewers out there, I was inspired to update because of all the reviews I got! We are now at staggering 207! Now, in response to my question of continuing on with writing more of Edward's POV, I have made a decision *double gasp!* I shall continue with writing from Lucie's, but occasionally add in Edward's to fill in the blanks when necessary, good idea?

Now, please review this, and then I'll update faster! Plus, do it to make me feel awhll happy! :p You want me to be happy, right? (Also, I'd like to thank everyone so, so much for reviewing the last chapter, all of them were appreciated, especially ones with questions, or constructive criticism! And of course the lovely compliments!)

Anyway, on with the chapter!

What happened last chapter: (In Edward's POV)

A sound that caused me to jump up.

A sound that made me forget about Bella.

A sound that chilled me to the bone.

For the sound that I heard was a terrible scream.

And I knew it was Lucie's.

***

But, I suppose this is more appropriate…

What happened last chapter: (In Lucie's POV, chapter 12-gosh, oh-so-confuzziling!)

"You're just an interruption." Her voice was cold and hard. Like ice, yet stronger. Ice could shatter, I was like ice. Whereas Bella was like steel.

And then: she was gone, running up to join Edward.

With that my life crumpled before me, as all turned to nothing because of one simple fact.

Bella knew.

She would not let me come between her and Edward.

And she would make them leave.

And I still couldn't breathe.

***

The Horrific Memories

I still stood there. Still not breathing. Still mulling over what she'd said in my mind. I felt like I was beginning to fall, I wanted nothing more than the earth to swallow me up whole, anything would be better than this. Anything compared to an overwhelming sense of dread.

What Bella had said was all true. She was right in saying that I was an interruption on her perfect life. I had ruined everything from her perspective, I knew she assumed that I could end her relationship with Edward in a heartbeat, she probably even thought I wanted to do so. Did she really think, even if I told Edward the truth; about Bella's past, that he'd believe me, if she stated otherwise? If she, herself, proclaimed her feelings for Jacob, did she honestly think that he would leave her? Because if she did, she was wrong. Even, I, the ignorant freak, could see that. But Bella did not see how blind Edward was, he was blinded by his love for her. Even though I could not read his thoughts; It was not hard to guess what consumed his mind. Edward and Bella belonged together; nothing could break them apart.

"You're just an interruption." The unwelcomed thought echoed in my head, so much less distant compared to all else around me; it, was still sharp and painful. I knew If I had any breath, I would have winced. Though the fact was, I had no oxygen within me. In fact, I felt like I had nothing in me. I was empty.

But still, she was right about what she had said, I was. Though this wasn't what scared me. No, what scared me was that interruptions tended to leave, to disappear over time, fading away into the shadows. I did not want to leave, I couldn't leave this world behind. Not with what I knew.

I was still standing shock still, rigid, unable to move an inch. I couldn't think, speak, move. Or breathe. I knew I should, I felt dizzy again; nauseated. Soon, I knew, I would not give out. I was after all, only human. Humans tended to need oxygen, I was no exception. But how could I breathe, when I knew what would happen.

They would leave.

Bella would convince them.

At this thought, I wanted to cry, but no moisture formed in my eyes, and the strength to sob was not present, though whether this was good or bad, I did not know, now, I knew nothing, I felt nothing. the world seemed to have caved in around me. The darkness silently suffocating me, forcing all my senses to shut down, though my eyes remained open. I wasn't sure where I was anymore, dimly I knew I was in the Cullen's house, but none of that mattered now. Because with a couple of simple sentences, my world had fallen around me. Slowly, devastating what little of myself was left. Everything around me blurred, I felt my eyelids flicker rapidly and I distantly knew what was about to happen. I was going to faint. Again.

And so I did the only thing I could do in a situation like this.

I would not be weak any longer. And so I had to escape. Using a renewed sense of energy I ran from the house, knowing they'd be too preoccupied to hear me leave. I liked the feeling as I ran, finally gulping down fresh air. It hurt my throat slightly as I sucked it in, greedily. I fought down the urge to cough.

I was still running, my legs working furiously beneath me, spurring me forward, into the confinement of the forest I had seen from the Cullen's living room. My mind was distant from my body; detached from what I was doing, though it only thought about one thing. I was scared to stop, scared to rest to take a breath. I could only run. It was the only thing on my mind. I broke into the forest, I felt the light above diminish as I ran through the now mossy earth. I noticed the canopy above let little light through, it came down in rays, illuminating the way forward. I kept on running, the energy from within me was not ceasing, I took deep steady breaths, scared of hyperventilation if I stopped. My mind concentrated on the way forward, yet it could not stay silent for long.

They would leave.

The moment I thought this, I was distracted, I woke up sharply from my state of calm by falling hard to the damp earth. I landed with a thud, in a patch of moss. My side grazed slightly against a rock, and I bit my lip hard in order not to cry out. Hoping that my wound from earlier hadn't reopened.

I breathed slowly, scared if I began to breathe faster. I wasn't sure why I'd ran. I supposed it was an instinctive reaction; running was the general way to escape. Though whether it was wise or not, I did not know. I wondered what Bella had done after I'd left. I was pretty certain that my disappearance would not have been noticed yet. It had only been a matter of minutes since Bella had whispered to me vehemently, causing me to run, to escape. She'd probably tell Edward I had been horrid to her and he would comfort her, sooth her, believe every word she uttered. A hiss escaped my lips. I shut them tightly shut, surprised by this action, and shocked at myself. I had never hissed before. But I could not think of Edward, not now.

He hates you. I blocked my thoughts and tried to distract myself.

I looked at my surroundings, and stood up slowly, wincing ever so slightly as I felt a stab of pain in my side, a felt a warm sensation and I knew that the cut had reopened. Great. I lifted up my shirt slightly, gingerly, to inspect the wound. Sure enough, a small dark stain was on my new cream shirt. The cut from beneath it was slowly pulsing out thick, crimson blood. I felt sick. The familiar smell of rust rose up from it. Again, I felt dizzy.

I carried on walking. I did not want to stop because of an injury, after all, it couldn't be that bad, I was not in a lot of pain. And I definitely wasn't going back to ask for it to be stitched up. After a while though, I knew I had nowhere else to walk. I don't know how long I had been walking, all traces of light from the entrance had vanished. I had never been here before, and then the prospect dawned on me as I looked back, the trees all alike from every angle, mirroring the green ground beneath them.

I was lost.

I sighed as I turned my head in each direction, accepting the fact that I had no idea where to go. Again I felt the overwhelming urge to cry. I was justified in feeling this; one was meant to cry out of frustration, and I was certainly frustrated. As I thought back to what had happened though, I realised I was far more than just that. Edward had argued with me, I had been sarcastic towards him, the brief feeling of triumph had left far quicker than it had arrived, now I felt bad again. I felt guilt.

I kicked a rock stubbornly at this. I should not be feeling guilt. Not again. My foot started to throb slightly and a sob escaped me. Everything I did was useless, I could not inflict harm onto others, only myself. I was the one who always ended up getting hurt. The rock remained untouched, as my big toe felt numb, just like when I'd punched Bella, only to be knocked back into a tree. Yes. Just me, always me, who suffered, as a consequence, to my careless, stupid actions.

But, as the sobs shook me, I wasn't granted the satisfaction of tears. I missed the way the fell softy down my face. Tears were a luxury I could not afford. Now only dry sobs escaped me, they ceased though, leaving only an eerie silence. The wood looked dark, though it was only midday. It was a lattice of green and brown, trees and plants overgrown, their roots protruding from the mossy ground, all of it looked so unreal.

But then I felt it. The terrible feeling that raised hairs on the back of my neck.

Someone was watching me.

I was not alone.

I turned round sharply, and squinted into the thicket of trees. I had heard a sound. Minimal, yet it was still significant. The sound of twigs snapping, beneath someone's feet.

My hasty action was careless, in my spin I stumbled slightly, tripping over an upturned root. I only just regained my balance, before I saw him.

I let out a sigh of relief and I felt the fear that had just seized my stomach ebb away somewhat.

"Jasper." I stated, just about managing to smile.

One that he did not return.

For Jasper was not looking straight at me.

His eyes were coal black.

And he was staring at the dark stain, from which the blood from my cut was causing.

I gasped.

My stress levels where rising; not good for my heart, which seemed to beat traitorously against my chest, louder than usual, a signal of where to strike. I could still feel the hot sensation of blood seep into the pale fabric, the pain had not yet arrived, though that was the least of my fears.

"Jasper?" I choked again, paralysed with fear, I simply stood there; utterly helpless.

"Lucie." Jasper muttered, finally replying after a long pause, and he began to come towards me. "I haven't yet fed you know." He said melodically, his steps were graceful as he danced closer, his movements were mesmerizing and his voice made me want to fall asleep, my fear had vanished. Now I felt calm, an odd emotion to feel at the moment. While my brain was screaming.

He's using his gift.

I noticed he was still getting closer, and, ever so slightly, I edged away. Jasper noticed, his eyes zoned in on the small distance I had made between himself and I, he smiled at me, his lips curved up slowly into a grin, in happiness I presumed, though for some reason this did not make him look more handsome. On the contrary, his finely carved features seemed rougher, his expression almost bestial. He smelt the air and sighed deeply, looking for the first time into my eyes. I was lost in the darkness of his.

"I don't normally hunt here Lucie." He whispered, his voice entrancing, hypnotic, I still hadn't moved any further, he carried on. "I tend to hunt further away from Forks, further east, the prey is far better, but then, I smelt the most glorious scent I've ever encountered. Do you know what I smelt, Lucie?" He questioned me, two meters away fro me now, somehow, throughout his speech, he'd managed to move closer. I knew I had to reply, but again I couldn't think probably, all was peaceful. Jasper wouldn't hurt me.

"N-no." I stammered slightly, and Jasper's grin widened, revealing his perfect white teeth.

"I smelt you Lucie."

And there was a silence. Half of me was peaceful, calm with Jasper's presence, but the other was not. Because half of me, had not been affected by Jasper's power, it was concentrating on the way he'd talked about me. His harmonious voice had become deadly silent, and it wrapped possessively around my name, and then suddenly, it dawned on me. I knew what he was planning to do.

The other half of me woke up.

Jasper had not yet hunted.

He had said I smelt nice.

When finally the realisation danced upon me, crashing down hard into my head and with an immense effort, I broke my eye contact with Jasper, this I knew; being the easiest way to make me feel how he wanted me to feel. He could control how I felt, he would distract me again, before he danced closer. And then I did the only thing possible, using all of my dwindling breath.

I screamed.

And turned to run, but not before the most inconvenient thing happened. Rendering me frozen where I stood, blocking out my view of the vampire before me.

Because at that moment, Jasper's past hit me.

The memories hit, fuzzy almost, out of focus at first, almost black and white, unclear, until more colours formed, pulling me under, into the void, of darkness. Then though, the colours spiralled before my closed eyes, dancing and weaving highly intricate patterns, before they settled onto the dominant colour: red. Red, as the blood from a boy falling and grazing his knee. Red, flowing from the small white rabbit, cradled in the blonde boy's arms. Red, from the man who lay dead before him, a bullet embedded in his chest.

A boy, less than seven, sat crying next to his dead father, his blonde hair limp, his mother ashen in a corner. Great grief and sadness, despair overwhelming. A great loss.

Triumph now, as he learned how to fire a gun, a sense of belonging as he used the weapon. Wanting to succeed when it came to battle, wanting to become a solider. Being told he was too young, his mother angry at his requests to fight. Telling him he'd get hurt. Annoyance towards the woman, wanting to prove himself, to show all his strength.

Distantly I knew I should wake up. I rebelled with the sensation of falling, fighting to stay conscious, trying desperately to open my heavy eyes, knowing all was not well. Something was wrong, something was in danger…

The boy was older now, around ten, his handsome features more refined, his blonde hair longer to match his growing body. Still living in the age of war Jasper Whitlock. Living in Houston, Texas, His mother still suffering, only trying to comfort him, not caring for herself. More colours; more feelings, the anger, pain, success, contentment, and the sense of still not belonging. I was the boy; excelling in class. I was the boy; cooking for a distraught mother. I was the boy; ready to serve

No. I was Lucie, and something was wrong, I should not be feeling like this, something was wrong, very wrong, I had to wake up…

More emotions, more colours, more thoughts, crashed around me, speeding towards me, making it hard to see the individual ones, though some stood out vividly against the rest. The boy was older again, a teenager, his figure muscular and well formed. Wanting to fight, wanting to become a soldier, wanting to serve, to be at someone's command. Knowing something was odd, deaths rising, people disappearing at night, wanting to know why. Wanting to know the truth, not believing his mother; this could not simply be a disease spreading. Knowing where he wanted to fight; The Confederate Army, knowing that this was a new army, disorganised, seeing the opportunities.

A voice drifted to me, reaching me as if after a long period of time, a beautiful resonance, spreading calm though me, in blissful oblivion.

"You're mine." The voice was deadly, ever closer; now only a meter away, I was still paralysed, unable to see, blinded by the memories, by the prevailing colour that flooded into my mind. Red. The memories still distant, the black and white contrasting with the blood remembered.

The deadly silence still lay thick on the air, I wasn't breathing, I couldn't move. Something was still wrong. I was meant to be running, running away from something…

The boy had aged fast, his maturity surprised others, charmed girls, though he did not respond to their evident interest. He could not get tied up so young, not when he was so close, girls would only hinder him. He seemed to have an aura; charisma, as his father used to call it. He had to succeed, nothing would come in between him and his goal. Determination. The strongest of all his emotions so far, saturated my thoughts, gripping me as I saw him assigned with his first weapon. Wanting to go to fight, still too young, barely sixteen.

His mother not wanting him to go, demanding he should stay. Anger. Needing to leave, wanting to fight, wanting to excel. Deciding, packing his rare possessions, leaving a note, escaping.

News from his mother, suffering without him, not caring, knowing to fight was all he knew, fighting was the only thing he was good at, the thing that he desired most. Finding the army, being recruited, lying about his age, saying he was twenty, instead of seventeen, his height convincing the others, along with his charm. Finally becoming what he wanted. Finally becoming a soldier.

Working well, getting good connections with officers, being told he was a good fighter, a good soldier, one of the best. Being given harder tasks, still excelling, surprising older officers, young inexperienced, and yet still better than the rest. He found he could control people easily, he could guess there mood. Seeing jealously in other's eyes, taking this as a good sign, feeling pride.

There was a beautiful sound emitting from somewhere, deep within my subconscious, I felt cold, the music was louder, I listened intently, wanting to here the music again. It formed into words, into a melodic voice, ever closer, still deadly, something was not right. Wanting to see, to understand; to wake up, the darkness reforming, pulling me under, as one memory came thrashing down hard, the longest, most significant, and most daunting…

Going on patrols, being promoted, high in command now, liking the sense of leadership; liking the power of a command. Becoming a major, youngest ever in Texas, even though he was lying about his age, the first battle of Galveston.

Being placed in charge of evacuating woman and children, them feeling calm in his presence, trusting the young soldier, taking a day to prepare them all, leaving with the first column of civilians to Houston. Darkness falling over the night, getting a horse, riding back to Galveston, knowing no time to rest. Determination, again building within. Near the city now, noticing something, three women on foot, dismounting, thinking they were stragglers, wanting to offer aid, wanting to protect.

Seeing their faces I the dim light of the moon, being shocked, awed, by there implausible beauty. Their pale skin, three of them, two blonde and one brunette, the brunette being the smallest, evidently Mexican, yet with such porcelain skin. They were all so young.

A musical sound emitted from one of the angels, a faired haired one, her voice tinkled like wind chimes. 'He's speechless,' she trilled happily, but the other blonde kept looking at the boy, a longing in her eyes, an eerie one. She leant closer to him, inhaled his scent. 'Mhmm,' she sighed, 'lovely.' But at this, the brunette, spoke; her voice just as high and beautiful yet sharper than the others. Filled with command, the smallest was the leader.

The girls bickered slightly, ever making curious remarks. Something was wrong, an instinct was screaming to get away from the angels, yet the boy could not, compelled by them, wanting to please. Then one mentioned killing, the feeling washed fast over the boy, causing the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up. Instinct was saying danger, yet judgement was rebelling, women needed to be protected.

No. Instinct was within me, I was standing, I could feel a cold breeze against my skin, and yet I felt something colder still. A touch against my neck. I felt my body shake, convulsing in the unknown fear. I did not know why I was afraid. The voice sounded again, in the distance, finally reaching my ears, as if through water.

"Can you remember Lucie, what I said in French before," The music sounded next to my ear, so close; a breath away, I could not remember, more images threatened to take me, my mind was switching between the image of three angels, and the darkness. I knew the darkness was the thing I should concentrate on. I had to wake up! Dimly, I realised I could not reply to the voice, it sounded again, breath tickled my ear, whoever was speaking was next to me, whispering something. But I couldn't catch it, I saw a flash of white beneath my eyelids, followed by black, followed by red…

The brunette angel; the seraph of the group, told something to the blonde ones, one exclaimed an agree of delight 'Let's hunt!' the boy's mind was whirring, another emotion came strong. Something was not right. Danger. But then, the two fair haired angels were gone, they ran into the distance, practically flying as their white dresses flared out behind them, dancing in the breeze. The other one stayed however, addressing the boy, 'What's your name soldier?' Emotions still flew around, replying out of habit, his voice came out stammered slightly, portraying his fear. 'Jasper Whitlock, ma'am.' And then the girl danced next to the boy. Run. The thoughts screamed, yet fear saturated him. Rendering unable to squirm yet but an inch away.

As the small angel spoke her words, they chilled the air. 'I truly hope you survive Jasper, I have a good feeling about you' I saw her lean closer, as if to plant a swift kiss upon his neck. But then the fire erupted, unimaginable pain seized him, as her teeth cut through the boy's throat.

"La tentation dépassa la raison." The voice sang, waking me slightly, yet my lids remained closed. It was incredibly beautiful, yet it sounded sinister, everything was so surreal, I couldn't decide which was reality and which was not, if either were for that matter. But again, the voice drifted, and now there was no mistaking the tone of reverence within the spoken words.

"It means, 'The temptation exceeded the reason'."

And then I felt a pair of marble hands cup my face, and now I knew that something was not only not right, not only terribly wrong. Something inside my mind clicked, I knew the thing that was in danger now: it was me. I was in danger, I had to escape, I had to…

The pain was excruciating, the next images flowed thick and fast. Pain. Agony. Heat. Unbearable heat. Flames. Fire. The feelings intensified, I writhed in anguish, all previous thoughts left, leaving only one sensation: the heat.

Waking up, the pain diminishing, heart no longer beating. Knowing he was dead. Seeing the angels, them explaining, realising the truth, of what he was, of what he had become. A vampire. Finally seeing, everything so clear, realising the weakness of humans.

A monster.

I felt my eyelids flickering rapidly, cold breath on my face still, a thousand more feelings and thoughts hit, now so much more refined, no longer black and white, everything was so clear…

Terrible desire gripping him, a craving, the largest temptation, ruling out the reasons of not to quench it. The taste of human blood. Power. Discovering agile movements, quick reactions, new appearance, now as perfect as the angels. Something was still wrong though. Not angels. Devils. Forever damned.

Joining up with his creator, the one to curse him to the eternal life, Maria, Nettie, Lucy. The names appeared before me, finding out about them, working with them, relieving the thirst, being rewarded. A whole new sense of wanting to impress, to exceed. Finding out his gift. Changing moods. The sensation was glorious: control.

Building an army, new born vampires. Being given power from Maria being put in charge of others, Maria becoming fond, worshipping her, always wanting to impress, to show off ability. Knowing this was the only life, being told so. Vampires had to kill humans, in order to survive.

Scars from each bite. Forever marking the times he had killed. And the times others had not complied.

Life continuing, gradually getting sick of the deaths caused, of being the reason for so many dead. Hating feeling their emotions of horror, their desperate, pathetic pleas to live. More thoughts, faster, speeding up, red staining the memories, as the blood shed increased. Finding another newborn; Peter. Civilised. Being like himself, not liking to fight, not liking to kill. Time passing. More new vampires, a female, Charlotte, feeling confused. Unsure of her emotions, forever changing, until he saw her with Peter, discovering her emotions. Love. Peter saving Charlotte, leaving. Letting them go, not destroying them. Maria getting angry.

More time passing, five years later, Peter coming back to him, showing him how to live differently, lives built from love, not thirst, leaving with them. Feeling confused. Alone. More emotions, thoughts, feelings intensifying. Gift not helping, one feeling dominant, strongest of them all, being too much to cope with.

Depression.

I smelt a scent; intoxicating, as it fanned over my face, the breath of someone, though it was as if it was tainted, I knew something was wrong, very wrong. I wanted more than ever to open my eyes, but I couldn't, I struggled once more to remain conscious, I needed to wake up. I knew how close the person was now, though whom, I did not know. All I knew was that something was iniquitous and that I needed to wake up. Else all would be chaos. And I knew my life depended on it. I shivered as a hand covered my mouth, trying to stifle an unheard scream, yet I could not scream, not without breath.

"I'm sorry Lucie, but the temptation has overruled all, I cannot suppress it." The musical voice sang, almost pained, yet the sadistic happiness apparent, and I wanted no more than to scream, knowing all too well that it would probably be the last sound to leave my lips.

A felt a sensation brush over my neck, something wet, as if someone were kissing me. I thought I could feel a sigh of pleasure, and wondered - not for the first time - what an earth was happening?

"NO!" A shout broke the silence, but I couldn't make out who it belonged to, everything was steadily becoming more distant again; not a good sign. Suddenly, the feeling had left my neck, I felt my knees buckle as I fell. Yet I did not awake as I felt a stab of pain beneath me, I felt like I was eternally falling.

I still could not open my eyes, I still could not move, I still could not breathe, I still could not remember what was happening. I fought furiously with the colours reforming, swirling dancing, I bit my lip, causing a trickle of something fall down my mouth. I tasted the salt. I knew what it was: blood. I could not think, not before the memories seized my unwilling mind once more, not allowing myself to judge what was happening. And once again, I was sucked back into someone else's past, knowing that my own would be erased, my future was sure to end…

Being alone, not coping, more time passing, new images, Now in Philadelphia. The sky, a turbulent grey; from the oncoming storm. Seeking shelter in a diner, eyes black with first. Fear of not being able to suppress it.

Seeing her. Small and petite, her hair jet black and spiky, walking towards him, she was beautiful. Knowing that she was a vampire, unsure of how to react. Being surprised. Emotions radiating off her, knowing that she meant no harm, her voice; a soft peal of bells, enchanting. 'You've kept me waiting a long time.' The feelings still emanating off her, like nothing he'd ever experienced before.

The girl holding out her hand, taking it without hesitation.

Feeling the most wonderful emotion for the first time in an entire century.

Hope.

Alice, the girl was called, the new angel, the only angel, now the soul reason for his existence. Telling him about a coven: the Cullens, explaining a new life, without human blood shed. Feeling wary; unsure. Alice being optimistic, convincing him.

Arriving, seeing their family, Carlisle, the leader, being shocked at his scars, Alice elucidating about her gift and his own, living with them, becoming part of the family. Finally: belonging. Alice-the small miracle, who had now become the very fixation of his life- had saved him.

A pain seared through me, I heard a crash, growling, more shouts, hisses. Someone; something, was fighting. Distantly, I knew I was falling again, and once more I gripped tightly at the edge of my mind. Determined to stay focused, to wake up, I had to wake up, I had to…

Adapting to the knew lifestyle, finding it harder than the rest, to control the interminable desire, perpetually within him. Moving to Forks, pretending to be human. Going to school. Suffering. The humans, their blood.

Spending time with Alice, the most perfect person. Finding out how much he loved her, it was the strongest emotion ever; unyielding, eternal. Kissing her, feeling like heaven whenever her skin was against his. The unyielding love and affection for the girl, basking in her forever happy mood.

The new blood, of animals, being a vegetarian, not as satisfying, but better, better than innocent humans dying. Anything, to control the monster, to stay with Alice, finally happy, when in her emotional climate.

Annoyance towards Edward, his power to read minds frustrating, him interrupting on his private thoughts, so often consumed with the monster that he knew he was. Not wanting Edward to know his struggles.

Emmett, Rosalie; together, he, Alice; together, Esme, Carlisle; together. Edward; alone. Seeing him suffer, the tedium of everyday, of the human façade.

Suddenly I felt a pair of miracle cool arms around me, a beautiful voice at my ear, so unlike the one before; this one, now saturated with concern, the anxiousness portrayed. It was rough, out of breath. I felt immensely cold, shivering uncontrollably, still unable to open my eyes. The voice was still murmuring, yet I could not hear the words, what with the pounding weight falling upon me again, the darkness ever searching, until it found me once more; held me in an iron grasp.

A new human arriving at school, seeing Edward change, feeling his mood around her. Remembering, all too well that one deadly emotion.

Knowing, he was falling for her.

More thoughts, thousands more, faster they came, now the girl knew about them, she loved Edward, her opening presents. Cutting her finger.

Seeing the blood, ooze from the cut.

Running at her, the monster reforming, hating himself, Edward livid.

Leaving, Edward thinking it was best.

I was being lifted then, the cool fingers lightly brushing away something from my cheek, a growl emitting from my captor's mouth, knowing the danger was still present…

Edward not coping, hating his emotions, the way they made him feel depressed, hating the fact that he was forever affected by his guilt and feelings because of the gift he possessed. Edward, wallowing in utter desolation, despair filling his mind.

Edward going to Volterra, wanting to commit suicide to end his pain, leaving the whole family in turmoil, every thing left in disarray. Alice, saving the scene, retrieving Bella. Adoration for her, the perfect angel.

Getting used to Bella's scent, it still being intoxicating, though not so much that he needed to quench the thirst, not with the knowledge of what Edward would become.

Everything getting back to normal, everyone settling back into there old life. Every one: happy. But then more images, all clear and defined, yet jumbled slightly, as if the film was running out. Suspicion. Towards Bella, her moods forever changing, always walking away when he was near, as if she was hiding something. Not telling Edward, respecting Bella, knowing she would not hide anything. Part of the family.

I felt immensely tired, as if all life had been zapped from me, something still wasn't right. The marble hands tightened their hold of me, more soft murmurs, the words indistinguishable, trying to see, desperate to open my eyes, once again, I fought with the darkness. But, yet again it held me, never retreating, never diminishing it's grip. I was being held, bound wherever I was, I still could not remember what was happening, everything was so surreal…

Another new student. Edward reacting oddly. Him, not being able to read her mind. Alice liking her, seeing visions of them being friends. Smelling her. The blood so intoxicating. Like, nothing he'd ever smelt before, ever come a cross such a sweet scent. The monster growling, growling his approval of the girl visiting. The desire, stronger than ever. Needing to be quenched.

Her falling in a car park, helping her, Alice wanting to keep her alive. Her blood, so close.

More scenes, more time, more colours whirled and spiralled before reforming into matter.

The girl being brought home by Alice and Carlisle, blood falling. Escaping. Running out of the house to hunt when she came to, not wanting to harm her, nothing that was so innocent and pure. Seeing red.

Hunting alone, seeing Edward, well aware of the darkness within his eyes, liquid onyx. Still, being unable to hunt, not wanting to taste elk or deer, knowing there temptation was not what he so desperately craved. Desire. Temptation. Forbidden.

Instincts overruling. Talking control, the power dispersed through each movement, limbs moving with supernatural speed, smelling the scent, running to it, determined to taste the blood. Seeing her fall. Seeing the blood seep through the fabric of her pale shirt.

Knowing he could not harm her, seeing her shake in frustration, her fair hair moving without an evident breeze, her scent drifting to him.

I heard talking now, people above, still to far for me to hear what they were saying. There voices were mixed, a high soprano, familiar in the way it chimed. A low brass, still anxious. Concerned. Suddenly, the voices became sharper, towards the front of my mind, I could distinguish them better, hear the individual notes.

"He's still out there, he was going to-" Someone was angry. Furious. It radiated off whoever spoke the words, but the soprano cut across, interrupting the explosion.

"Shh, I'll go after him, he'll be feeling awful."

"He doesn't deserve that!" More growling, though then the noise softened, the anxiety seeping back in. "Alice, look at her, what's happening?!" Something occurred to me then. The name swam before me once again, Alice, Alice… it sounded familiar. But the angry person was right, what was happening? Where was I?

I felt the memories tugging at me, drawing me in, like the tide, forever being towed back an forth. Never awaking, lost in the current…

Speaking to her, the monster erupting out of him. No turning back. Knowing she was afraid, scared. Sending waves of calm at her, determined that she would not run. Would not escape. Not when he was so close.

Her stammering, making the monster grin in pleasure. Wondering how much longer he would last. Until he succumbed.

Steadily drawing closer to her, his movements mesmerising her, rooted to the spot, still talking, trying to distract. Felling irritated. His powers not affecting all of her, only half, knowing she had the ability to run.

Her screaming. Trying to run then- staying put. She had frozen, her eyes blank. Much like Alice, then they shut, she was swaying, as if to fall. Still not moving. Moving closer, still talking, still trying to get closer, drawing nearer. So close now.

I was being lifted again, someone was cradling my head, the noises above me had ceased, now only two were apparent.

"She'll be horrified…"

"We have to leave." Something inside me jolted. They were talking about leaving. Something was terribly wrong, far worse than before, I had to tell them, had to stop them.

No, no, no…

Planning on how to attack the girl, deciding on dancing to her. Bending down as if to kiss her neck.

Closer, a foot away. Still talking, unsure of why she seemed so peaceful and yet her emotions changed every second. Depression. Fear. Determination. Loneliness. Control. None of them fit her, and they all disappeared so fast.

Feeling confused, but not letting that stop him.

Finally pressing his lips to her throat, ready to bite.

"NO!" A sound breaking his concentration. Recognition of the voice, knowing who it had belonged to. Being hurled away from the girl, to whom he nearly killed. Feeling disgusted, ashamed. But also, disappointed. Wanting her blood.

Watching the figure go to the girl, to take her away, his prey. The monster was furious. Feeling himself lunge at him, knocking him backwards, away from his prize. Snarls, a fight, it flashed before me, I still couldn't open my eyes though, I knew I had to wake up, the voices had stopped completely now, leaving only an eerie silence. It was now or never…

Running, escaping. Horrified at what he'd done, leaving the saviour of the girl, fleeing as not to harm her further, being so close to killing her. To drinking her blood. The monster within him groaning, mocking him for backing away. Yet he knew it had been the only choice.

But it was then that the bounds holding me broke free. And as the realisation dawned upon me I knew all was lost. The memories had scarred me, Jasper's horrific past. His terrible act in trying to kill me. Myself, only just escaping the clutches of death.

But that was not what scared me.

There had been a far greater peril, a distant one, in which I had overheard, halfway between consciousness and Jasper's past. The voices words; what they had said.

I had just remembered the most important thing.

Finally I opened my eyes. But no colour presented itself, there was only darkness, with pale moonlight seeping through, onto where I lay.

I screamed without breath, the sound dying soon after in my throat.

For I was in my room, alone.

And I knew they had left.

. . . .

Ok, so what did you think?

Now, questions, FIRE AWAY! This was probably really confuzziling… if not, congratulations, somehow you've managed to understand my babble which is referred to as writing! If not, please ask questions, I'll answer them as best I can!

Gah… So yup, that was Jasper's past that she saw and pretty darn hard to write, was it ok? I need MORE feedback, regarding this question: should I write an Edward POV, for what just happened? I'm not sure, but if it answers questions then hey, I'll give it a go!

And, I want to clear up a few things: Ok, firstly, loads of people ask when is Edward going to find out about Jacob, well, I can't say when, but it WILL happen, rest assured. Also, he WILL arrive in the story, just not yet ok? I'm sorry if you think this is moving slowly…

And lots of people are commenting on Bella being very OOC, I know, I know I'm sorry! But she does have a reason, which shall be revealed! OK?! (Also, may I point out, that this is set just after New Moon.)

*Gasp (wow, I've done that a lot now, the whole 'gasping' thing, you'd think I'd be out of breath..) apologies, for yet another long author's note…*

Thanks again if you've reviewed before, makes me really happy J and please review this, please? Please! PLEASE…

Also, I'd just like to say, that it is half term for me, hence the speedy update! But, I'm going to Wales to visit my best friend soon, and I don't know if I'll update before or after then… So, if you review, there's a much larger chance that I'll update before! (I am going on a skiing course! Cool, eh?)

:p

Lily- waiting for some reviews?