Chapitre 13 :
° Disclaimer still in the prologue.
It had been two weeks since the night of Xander's "possession" as Willow and Buffy liked to call it. Everything has returned to normal or as normal as it was before that school trip at the zoo; after all normal wasn't possible in Sunnydale.
Xander had told the girls that he couldn't seem to remember what had happened and they were completely happy with it. They didn't seem to suspect a thing, so he kept it at that with the help of Ripper, or well "Rupert" at school. Ripper was perfect in acting his Rupert's persona; nobody had even been able to see a telltale sign of Ripper's true character.
The four of them continued to meet at the library after class and Xander had to use his doughnut boy's façade once more. He was so bored of eating pizza and drinking soda that it wasn't funny, but it was expected of him and he had to bear with it.
What had become really hard for him was to hide his newly acquired senses and reflexes; he couldn't let the girls notice it for fear of them harming him. Buffy had become unstable at best, anyone who had power made her feel threatened. It was generally known by the demon's community that jealousy made her loose the little piece of brain that she had still working. She reacted badly to it, in a "you have power, you must die" sort of way.
Sadly Xander was falling in this category; what with all his senses being more potent than most humans, demons…, he knew he had to hide them from her for his own safety.
Willow was different but none the less dangerous, she was extremely jealous and envious, and she couldn't bear someone with more knowledge or magical ability than her. Though she and Buffy were capable of eliminating any threat they thought was coming for them, their means of doing it were completely different.
Buffy was all for using her physical abilities and stronger strength, she was not one to think. She was the kind of girl who would beat someone before asking question, and she had come to really like it.
Willow on the other mind was one to steal the knowledge or magical power from someone that she was envious of. If the person was to be killed in the process, she didn't care at all. For her, those persons didn't have the right to be better than her; she should be the better one. She was petty, intolerant, dangerous and crazy, someone you don't want to be notice by.
The two girls were completely different in their methods but unfortunately for the person who had the bad luck of being on their wrong side; one was as dangerous as the other.
So that was why two weeks later Xander could still be seen as a bumbling idiot that was looking less threatening than a fly.
Something that changed was his relation with Cordelia when the girls weren't there. They had taken the habit to meet and speak with each other just after school in the library's reserve, where the girls wouldn't saw them. They were afraid that their new found friendship would push Willow to harm Cordelia, as she was really possessive of Xander. She already didn't care for Cordelia, if she was to know that they were becoming close friends; she wouldn't hesitate in harming the girl.
Cordelia wasn't what she made herself be; she wasn't the snobbish girl that was the wet dream of every jokes and the nightmare of anyone who was judge under her social status. She wasn't that pest that anyone was envying and flattering in front of, but hating behind her back. In reality she was a sensitive girl who never hesitated in speaking her mind when it was needed; she was fierce and extremely protective and Xander was really grateful to have the occasion of knowing the real Cordelia Chase.
He had realised that he felt the same longing that he had been feeling around Kyle, Ripper and Angel. It had already been two weeks and this feeling hadn't diminished at all, on the contrary it had been increasing every time he would meet with one of these four. He had decided to see Ripper today and ask him about it, he was sure to at least give him a good advice if nothing else.
He was taking advantage of the fact that Cordelia wouldn't be there. It was her birthday and she was going to celebrate it with Larry and Oz; she had been excited about it during all week, because it had been a long time since she had been able to speak with Oz. Even though she knew that he would be unable to come, she had invited Xander all the same. She had told him that he was important to her, that he was her friend, and that she wouldn't be seen dishonouring a friend by not inviting him. He had been touched by the care she was showing him, after only really knowing him for two weeks. Xander had smiled, her birthday had been celebrated with her two friends since they were little; it had become a tradition between them on their birthdays. They were as close as Kyle, Jessy and he had been and to be invited in this group was a great honour.
It was why he could be seen alone in the direction of the library, there was no one except maybe Angel that he would trust with his questions. He knew that they would have the extended knowledge to help him and that they wouldn't use it against him. He would have gone to Kyle as well, but he knew by having already spoken with him that he was just as intrigued as he was.
Reaching the library's door, he opened it and entered; going directly to the office behind the counter where he knew Ripper would be. It was strange but there was rarely anyone who went there for their homework or anything else by the way, it was as if something was unconsciously repelling everyone. Most of the time it was only him, Ripper and the girls; it made it easier for their extra curricular activities but it made him uneasy. There was something wrong here and it worried him for Ripper's safety. He had discussed it with Ripper who had told him that he had noticed it as well; Ripper was already making research about it and promised him he would be careful. He had even gone and talked about it with Angel, who had promised to do research on his side to reassure Xander.
Unfortunately that didn't help alleviate his wariness, since he had come back to the library after his birthday; a feeling of wrongness had been surrounding him there. Each day he stayed with Ripper till it was time for him to lock the library's door; it was also why he choose the library to speak with Cordelia, because if anything was to happen he would be there to keep Ripper safe.
He knew he sounded a little too protective of someone who was older than him, and capable of taking care of himself, but he couldn't help it. When he had asked if it was bothering him, Ripper had smile fondly at him and said, "Of course not Xander! You are beginning to change and coming into your new potential since you have merged with Mayaeb. You are gaining her instincts and some of her stronger traits, like this protectiveness you are feeling for those you care."
"But I have always felt protective of you"; Xander said blushing as he wasn't used to tell anyone what he was feeling.
Ripper chuckled lovingly at Xander and answered "Yes, but now you have Mayaeb Alpha's instinct to add to your already extremely protective nature. You told us that the only thing she wanted out of the merging was a pack and she new that what was more important to you was family. So in merging with you; she gave you the power to not only gather your own family, but also to lead and protect them. I'm also feeling really honoured that you would consider having me a part of your pack." After that Xander had rushed to embrace him and told him that he had always considered him and Kyle family and that now Mayaeb's instincts were only accentuated the feeling.
A shake of his shoulder made him come back to the present and he looked at Ripper who was looking worriedly at him. Xader looked sheepish and told him he was alright, that he was just thinking back to their conversation about his protectiveness. Ripper looked relieved as he chuckled in remembrance.
"So what is bringing you here Xander?" Ripper asked.
"Well I wanted to ask you something." Xander answered
He told him of those feelings of longing he felt for him, Kyle, Angel and more recently Cordelia; and that he was felling the need to do something more, something to make them pack but he didn't know what. He was hoping that Ripper would know something that would help him, because it was beginning to make him go crazy.
Ripper didn't know what he needed to do either, but Xander had told them that Mayaeb had let with him all her knowledge. So, maybe if he was to meditate as she had taught him, he would be able to find in himself all the answers to his questions.
Xander felt dumb, why hadn't he thought of it himself? It was so evident; Xander's luenor gift was knowledge and Mayaeb had known it. She must have securely and safely stocked all her knowledge in his mind, to give him the time to feel at ease with his new instincts, senses and feelings. She knew that once he was ready, he would focus on his feelings of longing to gather his pack. So what was the better way for him to reach it than to use the meditation she had taught him?
He profusely thanked Ripper and he was already walking in the direction of the library's door, when Ripper told him to use his office instead of going home. He would have more time to meditate and would already be there when the girls came for their "Scooby" meeting. Xander had to say that he was relieved, because he wasn't sure he would have been in time for the meeting, here he was sure that should he still be meditating Ripper would be there to awake him.
Nodding his head in agreement, Ripper led him to his office. "Don't worry you won't bother me at all, I have work to do in the reserve. So take your time, I will be here if the girls came before you finish." He told him smiling gently.
"Thank you Ripper that will be a great help." Xander answered him with a big smile in response.
Then Ripper turned around toward the office's door and went to the reserve, letting Xander alone to focus on his meditation.
Xander was grateful of Ripper's help and told him as he saw him reach the reserve. He then closed the door and looked around the room till he spotted the couch in the back. The easiest way for him to meditate would be by using the couch; being comfortable would be a great help for him to focus. So not wasting a minute he sat on the couch reclining himself against its back and calmed himself.
It took him precious minutes because of his mind always going from one thing to another; he always had a hard time to empty his mind long enough for him to reach his core. Finally finding his core he thought of Mayaeb and the place in his mind where they had first met each other. For a few long minutes nothing happened; he was beginning to think that he had failed and had to find another way to find her knowledge; when he was suddenly brought to an open and wild grassland. Looking at his surroundings he was happy to see acacias sprinkling the prairie as he joyfully recognised the African savannah he had come to during his first meeting with Mayaeb.
Not really knowing where to go to find her or if she was really here in the first place, Xander went to where he met her the last time. Once he arrived, he slowly looked at the ground and here she was, standing in the same spot she had been that first time and looking proudly at him.
With a shout of joy he launched himself at her to only pass through her, as if she hadn't been there looking at him sadly in the first place.
"What?!" was the only thing Xander could say, shocked out of his mind.
"I'm not Mayaeb , Xander…" said the Hyena that was sitting in front of him.
"B… But…" Xander stumbled.
"No don't interrupt me; it will make it easier for the two of us." She told him. "I'm not Mayaeb, I'm here to teach you of what she was and what you'll need; I have taken her form because it was with her souvenir in mind that you tried to reach this place. The savannah is here as well because it made you feel more comfortable, but you had to understand that she won't come back; she is in you now and is happier this way. You know it, you felt her in every instinct, every feeling that go through you… I'm the materialisation of the knowledge that Mayaeb left you; I just took the physical form you wanted me to have to make it easier for you" she explained.
"Oh, Okay." Xander said sadly, but he was here to learn all he could for merging completely once and for all with who Mayaeb was, and he wasn't going to let his disappointment stopped it. So he took place on the ground, comfortably sitting in front of her and waited patiently for her to begin.
In the mean while Ripper had been organizing the reserve, looking at his watch he was shock to see that it had already been an hour since Xander had begun his meditation. He looked at his watch with a fond smile, remembering the day Xander had given it to him.
It had been in January when Xander and he had been talking about anniversary; they had talked about Xander's being in a few months, when the boy had asked him when his was. He had told him it was the next day and had seen the surprise in the boy's eyes. He knew that the boy had been disappointed by not being told before, but Ripper had explained to him that they had never talked about it before and he wasn't the type of person to go and say it point blank.
That had made Xander laugh and once it was time to go back to their home, the boy had told him good boy with a resolute expression on his face. Ripper had told him his good bye as well but had been confused by the look he had been given. He let it passed and didn't thought of it again till the next day in the afternoon, when the boy had come to the library after his classes.
Walking in he had observed his surroundings and when he had made sure that they were alone, he had rushed to Ripper taking him in his embrace and had wished him a happy birthday. Ripper had been touched by the boy's thoughtfulness and loving embrace; but a tear had fallen when the boy presented him with a present. He had opened it with great care to reveal that same watch he was wearing at his wrist.
The day after the boy's birthday and "dispossession" he had offered him the watch he had bought that day he had taken the train to his boarding school, it had a great value to him because it had been the first thing he had offered himself to buy during his newfound freedom.
The boy had been in tears when he had received it; Ripper had told him that he knew no one more worthy than him to have it and that he loved him. They had embraced for a long time before the boy went to search for Cordelia. Turning back to the present he was going to order the piles of books on his counter when the door to the library open and a figure rushed to him.
"Mr Giles, is Xander here? We need help, i…it's about Oz…"; Cordelia said tearfully, as he watch another boy walking behind her looking strong but nervous.
A.N:
° Well another chapter! Hope you like it.
°Thanks to Carlough for your wonderful review!
° Please review.