Chapitre 18 :
°Disclaimer still in the prologue.
° Just to avoid confusion:
"speech"
'Mind speech'
Xander and Ripper finally entered the manor, once they had made sure that the wards would break when they intended them to. They thought and hoped that Willow wouldn't be able to come back here the moment she felt her wards failed. She wouldn't be able to justify her presence there when everyone knew she was at a day's distance of Sunnydale, at her aunt's home. The absence of her parents would be harder to explain as she needed them to drive her back, so using her magic to apparate instantly was excluded.
Xander let Ripper enter first before locking the manor's door behind them, and then they made their way to the bedrooms upstairs. Listening around a smile of happiness lightened up Xander's face as he led Ripper's to Kyle's bedroom. Only the arching of an eyebrow betrayed Ripper's surprise at going to Kyle's room, he had thought that Oz would be brought in one of the unoccupied guestroom.
"It seemed I was right after all" Xander said smiling.
"About what?" Ripper asked confused.
"You will see…" He answered smirking.
With that said, Xander knocked on the door, opening it at Kyle's call to enter. What they saw upon entering the room made them smile. Oz was sitting on the bed embraced between Kyle's arms as Angel was at their side seeing to Oz's injuries. He was just finishing wrapping the last bandages when he looked up to see their smiles and grinned in return.
The sight of Oz reclining between Kyle's arms, subconsciously arching in the hand that was brushing through his hair, gave them hope. Hope that even after the tortures he had to endure at Willow's hand, he would be able to trust them. That simple gesture showed them that Oz had instinctively recognised Kyle as his soulmate, even if he wasn't aware of it.
So Xander went to the bed followed by Ripper and sat on Kyle's left side as Ripper went to the other side to sit beside Angel. They were careful of not disturbing Oz, trying to not frighten him from his seemingly safe haven and looked at each other. Kyle was the first to speak, needing to explain the new bond that had formed between Oz and himself. He had felt the change after seeing how badly Oz was looking bound to the wall as he was. A feeling of protectiveness, love, and rage had enveloped him for a moment; it had been so intense he hadn't been able to move. Then he had felt things that weren't coming from him, pain, despair, and fear; he had never doubted that these feelings came from Oz. Now that he had Oz safe in his arms, he had had time to think about it and the more time they spend with each others, the more the link between them was growing.
At that Xander smiled fondly and told them that the link between them meant they were soulmate, and that they would always be there for each other. From there he went on and explained everything from being a Were-Hyena, forming his pack, to Kyle being his Beta and a Were-Hyena as well… Everything that would make Oz understands and accepts them for who they were, and understands that they wanted him to join the pack.
"We had talked about it before we rescued you, and we would like for you to join the pack. We would protect you against Willow and Buffy, and Kyle really needs you." Xander said.
"I…I…but I'm a freak, no one want me, why would you?" Oz stuttered in a broken voice.
"First you are not a freak and I don't want to hear you say that again! That's Willow and your aunt talking, not you! No don't say anything, just hear me out for now okay?" Xander asked.
Oz nodded and relaxed himself against Kyle making everyone smile softly. Xander nodded back still smiling and began to explain to Oz the real nature of the 'Weres', who created them, what was and still is their role…, trying to make him realise that he wasn't a monster but a victim.
"I can understand that willow reacted badly at me being a werewolf, seeing as she didn't know before hand but why would my family reject me if it wasn't for me being a monster. I don't understand." Oz said brokenly.
"Well for Willow I don't think that the only problem was you being a werewolf, there is something a lot darker about her. As for your family there are two reasons for their rejection, even though those are really shameful to the 'Were' community. The first one is that you are a wolf and not a fox. It is completely stupid if you ask me but sadly it made sense for them. The other reason was that you were becoming too powerful for them and they were scared that you would try to take their place as the pack's Alpha. You were getting too much support from the members of the pack for their comfort. That's why they let Willow took you away, it was a solution to their problem." Xander explained.
"It's a lot to take in and I'm confused, but there are two things I know for a fact; what I feel for Kyle and my dream of joining a pack who accepted and wanted me. For once I would like to be with people who understand me and want me safe, who accept me for who I am. So yes Xander I want to join your pack if you are sure that I won't be a problem for you." Oz said.
"Of course you won't be a problem, trust me on that one. All that I ask of you is that you let us take care of you, we want you healed physically and mentally." Xander said and Kyle embraced him a little more closely.
"But what about my wolf it's completely unstable and feral; it's too dangerous." Oz asked his body trembling in fear.
"Don't worry me and Kyle will help you in maintaining your sanity during your transformation." Xander responded.
Not wanting Oz to panic, Xander gently kneeled above him squeezing his hand in comfort and leaned slowly against him, knowing that Kyle would help him made Oz comfortable. They felt Oz froze between them but as he was beginning to tremble Kyle squeezed his other hand, rubbing his arm in en effort to soothe the boy. Kyle then spoke softly and lovingly against his ear relieved as the boy fell in his arms completely limp and calm, their bond opening completely between them.
Knowing that the boy wouldn't be able to relax anymore than he already was, Kyle made a nod in Xander's direction while he told him through their mind link that Oz was ready. Xander smiled tenderly at Oz and rubbed his nose against the boy's neck, letting him breath his scent to get him used to his new Alpha's scent and make him comfortable in Xander's presence. When he felt the boy react calmly to his sent; Xander bite the place between Oz's neck and shoulder. He felt the mind link between them open as he felt it flow through them, though like with Ripper he didn't try to read Oz's memories; the boy needed to talk about them to heal and Xander reading them wouldn't help him in the least. To read someone's memories you needed his trust and agreement, or you would risk hurting that person's mind. Before exiting, he felt Oz's bond with Kyle and was really happy at the strength it was already showing, those two were made for each other there was no question about it.
"Oz, I had a feel of your wolf and right now he's unstable. We need for you to transform, Kyle, Ripper and I will as well to avoid any problem. As your Alpha I will be able to help your wolf in finding his true self. The problem right now is that the nature of your wolf had changed; you were born to become a warrior and protector like Ripper, but the rejection of your family, the tortures brought upon you by Willow and your fear and dislike of your own nature, made you become a nurturer.", Xander said looking Oz in the eyes.
"A nurturer?" Oz asked.
"Nurturers are more seen in she-wolves behaviour, but it's not rare for males who have been hurt emotionally or physically. They are more disposed to take care of the young and protect them, while being protected by the warriors of your pack. I think that you and your wolf need to be loved and protected for you to heal." Xander explained.
"So I am even more of a freak than I thought?" Oz asked in despair.
"No! You just need to free your wolf, you are one and the same but you are rejecting him, so you are rejecting a part of yourself. You can't hope to heal if you don't accept him, and being a nurturer doesn't make you a freak. You had a hard life and your mind had been broken at one time, and to heal, your mind needs to adjust. So you aren't a warrior anymore but Cordelia told me that you never wanted to fight in the first place, and yes you want to be protected and safe but that doesn't make you weak. It just means that while you will be able to fight you won't focus on attacking but defending." Xander answered.
Oz seemed to think about it for a moment before looking in Xander's eyes searching for something and then repeated the action with Kyle. Once it looked like he had found what he was searching for, he nodded to himself and looked back to Xander.
"Will you help me?" he asked determined.
"Of course." Xander answered proud of Oz's decision.
Not a minute later two hyenas and a wolf stood on the floor before Oz, Kyle's form was bigger than Xander's though lighter. It reflected that while Kyle was stronger physically as he was a pure hunter and protector, Xander was more powerful magically. Like with auras the darker the Were's hair were, the more magical abilities he had. Ripper's wolf was big and of a really dark grey showing strong magical abilities, he was a warrior and protector. Ripper having more magical power than Kyle but less than Xander and less physical strength than Kyle but more than Xander; it was balancing their forces and weaknesses rather well.
As Kyle was using their soulmate bond to support and reassure his mate, Xander opened his link with Oz and mentally showed him how to transform in his wolf form and to trust in them to stop him before he hurt anyone, all he had to do was accept his Were's form.
Oz calmed himself and meditated in order to find the place where he had locked his wolf in, it took him some time but he found it. It was well hidden but once he saw the place he had no doubt he had just found it. The place was represented by a forest, an extremely dark forest that made him ill at ease; reflecting perfectly the hate he had felt toward this part of himself till this day. He was nervous but knew that he had the support of his pack, he felt them through the pack's bound, but it was something he needed to do alone as only he could accept this part of himself.
With that decision made, Oz went carefully through the forest beginning to see his error. The forest was in a state of abandon nothing was growing anymore, the plant life seemed to disappear and the trees showed signs of dying. More than half of the bushes which were the only plant life left had become dry and arid; it made him ill. Was he killing his Were's nature? After a short walk he finally saw him but it wasn't what he thought he would find at all. This wolf that was growling at him was anything but what he had just seen Kyle, Xander and Ripper transforming in. His wolf was small and ill looking, he could see the bones showing behind the skins and many injuries which were still bleeding. Though what pained him the most was the suffering he could see behind the feral eyes; forgetting his fear he walked closely and carefully to the wolf, extending his hand for him to smell.
What he didn't expect though was for the wolf to attack and jump him; he fell on the ground at the impact and could only look in shock as the wolf disappeared through him. Then his link to his Alpha flared to life and Xander appeared next to him and sat beside him.
"Okay Oz you are doing great but you are not finished, now that you have freed and accepted him, you need to control him. Right now he had taken control of your body, but I'm here to help you restrained him. You need to fuse your human part with your wolf part like it should have always been." Xander said quickly feeling Oz beginning to panic.
"But how?" Oz asked nervously.
"As your Alpha I'm going to brought back your wolf here and restrain him for you, then we will help you merge back with him." Xander explained.
"Merge back…" Oz said confused.
"Yes, you were born a werewolf, so there should never have been a separation between your human side and your wolf side. You were a 'Were'; an individual originally born from magic not a human nor an animal, just a different creature. What made your true nature broke in two was the distrust and rejection from your family first and then the suffering endured from Willow. You needed to escape and they made you hate yourself, the result was worse than you could have imagined, and you are slowly but surely killing yourself." Xander said. Looking at Oz he noticed the sad and guilty look on his face and added, "It wasn't your fault though, you were pushed to it. Your aunt knew very well what she was doing and I'm not going to let it go that easily. She's going to hear from me and the pack, she could have killed you."
Oz was still trying to go over everything he had learned but sadly Xander couldn't let him have the time to recover from the confusion. They needed to restrain Oz's wolf part before he hurt anyone in the room, so Xander went to Oz squeezing his shoulder in comfort and support telling him to open his mind to the rest of the pack; they would all help him through the merge.
Oz closed his eyes and a second later Kyle and Ripper appeared beside them. Each one took a place at one of Oz's shoulder, offering him their support and trust.
Xander smiled at the unity that was beginning to form between his pack mates and asked them if they were ready, there was no need to let Oz's nervousness grow. Once they all nodded, a bright glowing green light surrounding him as Oz's wolf appeared beside him. As the wolf was growling and readying himself to jump on one of them the green light focused on the wolf and chained him.
Being eye to eye with the wolf's part of himself and feeling secure with the support freely given by his pack mates, Oz let his instincts flew freely through him. As he glanced to the chains restraining his wolf, he noticed that they were created by Xander Alpha's magic and knew that he was completely safe. He approached them and kneeled before the wolf looking him in the eyes; he recognised the suffering, pain and mistrust he saw in them as his own and understood. He understood that the two of them felt the same things, the same pain but as they were different in nature, they were reacting to it differently. Separate, the two of them wouldn't be strong enough to heal and with time would die, but if they were to merge they would be strong enough to heal, strong enough to be Oz again. With that thought and Oz's real acceptance, the magic began to glow and move again, surrounding completely the two of them this time.
Once the light disappeared, Kyle, Xander and Ripper could see a perfect mix between human Oz and wolf oz standing before them. The boy was still the same with the exception of wolf ears, tail, fangs, claws and eyes. Once Oz had finished feeling and discovering his new appearance he looked up and could only be shocked at the others mix appearance as well.
He wasn't so shocked by their new appearances but by the fact he hadn't seen it before. Xander felt the thought and answered him that he wouldn't have been able to notice their real appearance, before he had accepted who he really was. Only the merging would gave him back his senses as a 'Were'. Oz was going to ask something else when he was stopped by the need to yawn.
They decided to go back to awareness and that they would respond to Oz's questions tomorrow, once he was well rested. Back to the bedroom they helped Oz to lie in Kyle's bed under the covers as he was completely exhausted. Kyle was going to exit the room when Oz asked for him to stay. Smiling tenderly at the two, Xander and Ripper exited the room with Angel, who had been standing at the door all this time not wanting to disturb Oz's merging with his vampire's scent.
They took him to the manor's library where they sat comfortably on the couches and retold him what had just happened, and then finally went to sleep as the sun was rising.
AN:
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