Meditation was going to be her favorite part of each day's training, Brinna decided the next morning. Though the shadows of the dark side would always be present, Brinna felt centered when she was meditating. All of the confusion, all of her misgivings, were temporarily put aside as she allowed her mind and body to attune to the power of the Force within her.

When the hour was over, Master Zhar led her through the process of attuning herself to certain aspects of the Force, in order to learn which abilities she currently possessed and those that she had begun to attain but would need to concentrate on mastering. It was almost an intuitive process for Brinna and by the time the two hours had ended, she had already progressed to the point of calling small objects to her through her command of the Force.

Her progress was much swifter than she had expected. When Zhar had told her that her training would have to be accelerated, she had misgivings but it now looked to her like she would be able to keep pace with it. She had no doubt that she would be both physically and mentally exhausted by the end of every day but these would be small sacrifices to pay for all that she would learn.

The history texts and testimonials of the Jedi caught her interest and held it. She devoured the information that was given to her, absorbing it and recalling it in such detail that it was almost as if she'd studied it over and over for many years instead of for a few hours. It seemed astounding to her, but then she had always had a rather photographic memory.

Brinna's combat training session was also much more fruitful than it had been the previous day. She learned to let go of the thoughts that held her back from her potential, learned to begin to trust in the instincts that told her when to strike and when to dodge. In so doing, she began to anticipate Bastila's moves and to respond to them in a manner that was more advantageous to her. As she whirled and avoided a particularly swift strike, Brinna saw Bastila's eyes widen in surprise and it was difficult for Brinna to suppress her smile.

It was this difficulty that was really at the center of her greatest difficulty with the training. Zhar had begun to instruct her on the Jedi Code and one line in particular stood out in her mind: "There is no emotion, there is peace."

No emotion, Brinna repeated to herself. No emotion. How is that possible?

She wasn't sure if she could swallow this pearl of Jedi wisdom, but she kept that thought to herself. Her emotions weren't exactly out of control—or at least she didn't think so—but she couldn't deny that they were there. As a scout, it had been imperative to operate on logic rather than emotion on many occasions but she had a heart and she had never been particularly afraid to use it or to rely on it when necessary.

No emotion, she thought. Without emotion, how could she really watch over Mission? The Twi'lek needed someone to care for her. How could someone care for her without emotion? Brinna already felt that it was too late for her to pull back when it came to Mission. She had already started to look at Mission as a sort of little sister. If she now treated Mission with the lack of emotion that the Jedi seemed to demand of her, she was certain that it would devastate the Twi'lek and Brinna as well. Mission had lost far too much to lose that connection to Brinna without its having a serious and detrimental effect on her.

And Carth… Perhaps that was one situation where a lack of emotion would serve her well. She could not deny the pain she felt at the thought of their conversation from the previous night. She hadn't meant to make the admission to him that she had but in the heat of the moment, she had opened herself up to him and she was beginning to regret it. She didn't owe him anything, so why did she keep trying? Why was she putting herself in a position that allowed him to hurt her? She had never done that before and she had no idea why she was doing it now.

"You did well today," Bastila told her as they returned to the Ebon Hawk at the end of the day. "But do not let that allow you to become lax in your studies."

"I won't," Brinna said shortly. She was really not in the mood for another of Bastila's lectures.

"It is easy to say that but you must be sincere."

"I am."

Bastila frowned at her and looked down her nose. "Have you not paid attention to what Master Zhar has said?"

"I have paid attention, Bastila. If I hadn't how do you think I would have bested you today during combat training?" Brinna asked, her patience wearing out.

"You need to learn to control your pride," Bastila responded coldly.

"Me?" Brinna asked. For the second time in as many days Brinna lost control of her temper. "You're a fine one to talk, Bastila! You need to learn to practice what you preach!"

Bastila's face turned red and anger flashed in her eyes but she did not respond. Instead, she took a few deep breaths and Brinna could sense Bastila reciting the Code in her head.

There is no emotion, there is peace…

Stop picking fights with everyone, she told herself.

"Bastila, I'm sorry," she said, with a sigh. "I do need to learn better command of my emotions. It's just that everything has been happening so fast over the last couple of weeks that I don't know which end is up sometimes."

"You must deal with that. None of us is certain what is to come in the next few weeks," Bastila said. Her voice was calm but Brinna could detect a faint edge of anger to it.

"You're right, of course," Brinna told her.

"It's best if we leave this discussion for another time. You are weary and need to rest."

Brinna nodded, although she felt that Bastila was simply avoiding her once again. Still, she didn't really mind the avoidance. She didn't feel like dealing with the situation between her and Bastila at the present time either.

The two women headed in separate directions once they boarded the ship and Brinna breathed a sigh of relief. There was always a tangible tension in the air when she and Bastila were around one another and it was beginning to wear on Brinna. She wished she knew what had caused it but she would no sooner ask Bastila about it than she would ask Bastila for advice about her problems with Carth. They did not know one another well enough for Brinna to feel comfortable with such a personal conversation with Bastila and it was beginning to look like she never would.

Brinna stood for a long time under the warm water, letting it fall on her aching head and shoulders. She wished she could stand there for the rest of the night but she finally sighed and stepped out, toweling herself off briskly and hastily pulling her clothes on before heading to the bunkroom. Mission was inside, sitting cross-legged on her bunk and rearranging her Pazaak deck. She looked up and smiled tentatively at Brinna.

"Am I diseased?" Brinna asked, putting a hand on one hip and cocking her head as she regarded Mission.

"What?" Mission asked, blinking.

"Am I diseased?" Brinna repeated.

"Not as far as I know," Mission said, looking hopelessly confused.

"Then why is everyone treating me like I am?"

Mission's expression softened and she shook her head. "Yeah, you're right. We are kinda treating you like that."

"Yes, you are. Why?"

"I don't really know for sure," Mission said thoughtfully. She pushed her deck aside and gave Brinna her full attention. "I guess no one really knows what to say to you anymore."

"That still doesn't explain anything to me," Brinna said with a tired sigh. She dropped down onto the edge of Mission's bunk.

"Well, you're becoming a Jedi. I think everyone's sort of in awe of you or something."

"In awe of me?" Brinna asked, surprised. She hadn't been expecting that response.

"Yeah. I mean, the Jedi are all so mysterious and…different, I guess. They're not like other people in the galaxy. They walk around in their robes with their lightsabers stashed in their belts and no one really knows what to make of them. I mean, sure, they do a lot of good things but then they keep to themselves so much. Plus they act all serene all the time. To be honest, I think it makes people a little suspicious. I mean, who can go around being serene all the time?"

"I don't know," Brinna said, smiling wearily. "I see what you're saying but I can't imagine myself like that."

"Why not? They're making you a part of the Order now. Isn't that what they'll expect of you?"

"I have no idea what they'll expect of me. They're not exactly being clear about that."

"Hey, I know this is hard for you but, still, can't you see it from our perspective? No one really understands the ways of the Jedi except for the Jedi themselves and they're not exactly sharing that information with the rest of the galaxy."

"They're not exactly sharing it with me either at the moment."

"You're scared," Mission said, placing a hand on Brinna's shoulder in a consoling manner.

"What?" Brinna asked, taken aback.

"You're scared. I can see it in your face. How could you not be? You thought you knew all about yourself, thought you had your life in order and now the Jedi are telling you you've got all these special abilities you never knew you had and they want to make you a part of their Order. I think that would be enough to scare anyone."

"I guess I hadn't really thought about it like that," Brinna admitted.

"Is this what you really want?"

"Yes…no…I don't know. Like you said, I thought I knew all about myself. I have a ship back at home. I've been a scout for ten years. I was happy with that life. If someone had told me I was destined to become a Jedi, I would have laughed in their face and said I wouldn't want to even if I could. But now that I'm here, now that they've started training me I can't help but think that maybe this is a good thing, that maybe this is what I was meant to do."

"Just make sure it is what you really want."

Brinna shook her head and smiled with some admiration at Mission. "You are way too mature for your age."

Mission smiled wickedly. "Way too mature? Me? You have to be kidding. I'll be sure to commit that one to memory so the next time I tease you about your age and you accuse me of being immature I can throw it back in your face."

"I'm becoming a Jedi, remember? I'm now above all your teasing. I'm far too serene for it to bother me."

Mission snorted derisively. "Right, you're the picture of serenity. You ooze it from every pore of your body."

Brinna made a face. "I don't think I want to ooze anything from every pore of my body."

"That would be pretty gross," Mission agreed.

With a laugh, Brinna swept Mission into a hug. "Remind me to always talk to you whenever I'm in a bad mood. You're really good at helping me forget about it."

"It's a special talent. Now, you're not planning on hiding in here all night again, are you? I know you weren't asleep when I came into the room last night."

"You do? And here I thought I was such a good actress."

"Hardly," Mission said, rolling her eyes. "Don't forget, I see a lot more than most people think. It's how I got by on Taris."

"Like I said, far too mature for your age."

"So are you gonna come out and join the rest of us tonight?"

Brinna sighed. "I don't know, Mission. I don't really feel like being stared at tonight."

"I bet you wouldn't say that if it was Carth who was staring at you," Mission teased her.

There must have been a pained expression on Brinna's face because Mission's expression quickly turned sober.

"Trouble in paradise?" Mission asked.

"You're nosy," Brinna responded.

"It's part of my charm."

"You like to think so, anyway."

"He does stare at you, you know," Mission said gently.

"Probably because he's waiting for me to turn into a dark Jedi or something," Brinna snorted.

"I don't think Republic soldiers look at dark Jedi like this," Mission said. Her expression changed to one of thoughtfulness tinged with something like intense interest.

"Stop it," Brinna said, playfully shoving Mission.

"Look, I know Carth's a pain but I'm telling you that I think you're maybe getting through to him or something. I mean, he's a nice guy but he just seems so angry about something. But when he's around you, he smiles. And I mean really smiles. He doesn't look so old then."

Brinna shoved Mission again. "He's not old."

"Whatever you say."

The two were quiet for a minute. Brinna couldn't help but smile. After the day she'd had, she hadn't though she'd be capable of it but Mission had successfully lifted her spirits. Of course, Mission's telling her that Carth stared at her didn't hurt either. It was gratifying to know that she wasn't the only one doing some staring.

"Come on," Mission said, getting up from her bunk and grabbing Brinna's arm, dragging her along. "You're not hiding away in here all night. You're going to go out there and eat with the rest of us. You're going to show everyone that you're still the same Brinna you were when we first met you, only you have Force powers now."

"Hmmm, I think I remember saying something about how I'd Force Trip you if I could…"

"Okay, Bastila," Mission said, rolling her eyes.

"Ugh. Please don't call me that right now."

"If the shoe fits…"

"You know what; let's go get something to eat. Hopefully if your mouth's full enough you won't be able to talk anymore."

They went out into the common room and found Canderous, Carth, and Zaalbar sitting around eating. Carth was eyeing Canderous beadily but the Mandalorian was the perfect picture of relaxation, smiling back at Carth and eating in a leisurely manner that suggested he didn't have a care in the world. Brinna shook her head at the sight and she heard Mission snort.

"I can't believe you started without me, Big Z," Mission said, plopping down next to the Wookie.

"I thought you were never coming out," he told her.

"You'd better keep an eye on that walking carpet of yours, kid," Canderous told her. "He's going to eat everything on board."

Zaalbar growled in response and Brinna moved over to seat herself next to Canderous. Carth was sitting almost directly across from her but he did not look at her.

"Oh, Canderous, get over yourself already. We all know you're a big, tough Mandalorian. No need to spill any blood unnecessarily to prove it," Brinna said, reaching over and snatching some of his food from him.

"I'm not afraid of Jedi, you know," he told her, grinning at her.

"Yeah, well, I'm not afraid of you either. Anyway, you could have fooled me the way you were all treating me last night. I felt like I'd suddenly turned into a rakghoul or something."

"It's because we're all intimidated by your newfound power," Canderous said, his mouth quirking at the corner.

"Yeah, right. As if you're intimidated by anything. You barely even batted an eyelash when Calo Nord pulled out that detonator. I, on the other hand, thought we were all done for."

Canderous nodded in acknowledgement of her statement.

"Calo Nord pulled a detonator on you?" Mission asked, her voice sounding rather awestruck.

With an arrogant smile, Canderous turned his attention to Mission, telling her in great detail about their confrontation with Calo Nord and Davik. Brinna tuned the discussion out. She glanced over at Zaalbar and saw that he, like Mission, was listening to Canderous with rapt attention.

Oh, great, just what he needs. Another admiring audience for his war stories, she thought, smiling.

She turned and looked across the table at Carth and was startled to see that he was already looking at her. He gave her a small shrug and an apologetic look and she felt the last vestiges of her anger at him melting away. She shook her head but smiled at him and he smiled in response.

Brinna was glad Mission had talked her into joining everyone for dinner. Everything seemed to be almost back to normal and she almost felt as though she were back to normal as well. Bastila didn't join them and Brinna didn't ask where she was. There was no need for her to do so anyway. She knew Bastila was in the enclave and that she was meditating.

After dinner, Brinna played some Pazaak with Mission while Zaalbar sat watching them. T-3 stood next to the table, beeping away at them. Brinna couldn't make any sense of what he was trying to communicate but it looked like Mission could and Brinna began to suspect that T-3 was telling Mission which cards Brinna held in her hand. Predictably, Canderous had gone off to mess around with the weapons and equipment and Carth had disappeared into the cockpit.

A few hours passed and Mission yawned and announced that she was going to bed. Brinna made a sour face at her. They'd only been playing for a pittance each round but Mission had still managed to swindle twenty credits out of Brinna. She walked back to the bunks with Mission and they changed into their night clothes. They each lay in their bunks chatting idly for a while until Mission fell asleep. Bastila returned shortly afterward and Brinna knew that Bastila could sense she was still awake but the Jedi didn't say anything to her. A short while later, Bastila was asleep as well.

Brinna lay staring at the ceiling. She told herself that she was not going to get up but she knew that was a lie. She got up. Brinna told herself that she was not going to go to the cockpit but that was a lie as well and, with a sigh, she set off in that direction.

"I didn't think you'd be here tonight," Carth said, as soon as she walked through the doorway.