So these academy spars…

Iruka sensei decided to make them no holds barred. Yes! I'm not going to tell you what happened because it doesn't really matter, but Sasuke used his Fireball jutsu. That means I'll have an excuse to know how to perform it by the time the Genin Exams roll around.

You're confused aren't you? This year's long term prank is to badly impersonate Sasuke. See, it's really hard to take someone seriously when someone is doing a shoddy impersonation of you three steps behind you and two steps to the left.

I even managed to dig up a blue shirt and white shorts to complete the ensemble. I stole his arm warmer things one day. It was awesome.

And then he beat me up.

It was the fact that I came out of that relatively unscarred that convinced him I would make an almost decent sparring partner.

Shockingly enough, he made me into his own personal project. Sasuke thinks that if I fight him enough, I'll get good enough to become a decent challenge for him one of these days. Apparently he has realized that without a decent sparring partner, he will stagnate. I love how these excuses keep landing in my lap!

It's hilarious; Sasuke is giving me lessons on how to be Sasuke simply because some of his fan girls are wierded out by my impersonation. Yeah, Sasuke spars with me once a week, so every Friday after the Academy lets out we go to his place and beat the hell out of each other.

Funny thing is that Sakura hates me even more for this. I'm stealing her Sasuke Kun's attention from her. Hah! I'm guessing it's one of her fantasies to be training with Sasuke Kun and things get sexy…

So anyway, Shikamaru's pissed at me because he insists that his grades should be higher than the dope's (read mine) even though my grades are now well above average.

Or maybe it's because I put flowers in his hair the other day…

Ino found it hilarious. Mostly because she's the one I got the flowers from. I asked for a small bouquet that essentially meant 'get to work you lazy bum!' You know how all the girls have to take that flower arranging class. They are taught the meanings of every flower in a bouquet, probably so they can send secret messages.

Yup, that might explain why the girls laughed harder than the guys.

I would tell you about more of my exploits, but that would get monotonous.

Hey, did you know that Tenten works for one of the local blacksmiths? Yeah, she's not their daughter like most people think. Anyway, when I visited Team Gai one day she taught me a bit about kunai handling. My aim won't be as good as hers without a few years practice, but she taught me a few tricks I didn't already know.

See, when you spin a kunai, you built up centripetal force. If you fling it and it hits the target, it will fly faster than you could normally make your kunai manage. It's not very reliable though, since it would take a massive amount of work to make you flings dependable, and even then you would have to take the time to spin the kunai.

This gives me a great idea for a new technique though. What if you chakra enhanced the kunai, or better yet, wind enhanced it? I'm going to take this time to laugh maniacally before running off to practice that flinging trick.

Well, since I told you about that plan for a jutsu, I should tell you about my other idea. You know how you bring your hand up to your mouth when using the Fireball jutsu? Yeah, see when I do it I let the fire catch on my hand. By the time 'm done spitting a fireball, I already have a secondary one at the ready. I can either go hand to hand with it used as some sort of Fire Palm, or I can throw the damn thing.

Either way, it's not a strong enough fire to seriously hinder or injure any competent shinobi. After all, most shinobi wear clothes that are at the very least somewhat fire retardant. The only way I can do any real damage with it is to hit naked flesh. That means I have to aim for the head, neck, fingers, toes, and possibly their midriff. Ninja are such idiots for wearing open toed sandals.

I'm defiantly going to have to get around to making it better eventually.

-

Finally it's time for the Genin Exams. It has several parts consisting of a written test going over history, economics, geography, mathematics, strategy, and basic ninja knowhow as well as the practical course consisting of and accuracy, stealth, tactics, taijutsu, ninjutsu, and genjutsu.

Naturally I passed with ease even though I still can't do a decent Bushin. I made sure not to make Rookie of the Year, but I'm definitely no dead last.

And of course all the fan girls are squealing about how my accomplishments are all accredited to Sasuke and his teachings.

Makes want to throw up. All we did was beat the hell out of each other every Friday, and it's a good I gained humility over the years or I wouldn't have been able to let myself lose every single one of those matches.

A note about fighting an Uchiha. If they have a Sharingan, never fight with your full potential until you are ready to kill them. See, most people do all sorts of complicated jutsu in an attempt to overpower them only to have them fed back to them. Very embarrassing business that is.

The trick is really simple; when you're ready to kill them you've got to be good enough to own them. Use things that they already know, or can't copy. That's why I'm learning these fire techniques. Perhaps I could use the finer point of an elemental affinity, or advanced fujinjutsu, or Sage Mode techniques. Point is, never show off to an Uchiha Sharingan active or not.

It's now the day of Team Assignments. Since I'm not the dope, they shouldn't put me on Team 7. All the problems associated with being on the same team as Sasuke would be solved right then and there. I'll probably get filed away as a rank and file shinobi, where I can get stronger in relative obscurity. Or on the off chance that I get on Teams 8 or 10, I'll have to rethink my plans.

Yeah, funny thing about Mizuki and the Forbidden Scroll… I didn't have to do anything about it. I wasn't depressed about failing, so he couldn't blame the whole thing on me. And since in my first life, I was the only one the fail the Exam he had to do it himself. He sucked so bad that he got caught by the Hokage sneaking in. and so, Mizuki was never heard from again.

"Team 7 is Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, and Uchiha Sasuke under Hatake Kakashi."

WHAT THE HELL?

Damn it. Ino, Choji, and Shikamaru's dads were a super team back in the day so their gonna recreate that and nobody knows that my tracking abilities fit perfectly in Team 8. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.

Damn it all to hell.

Oh right. All is not lost. Maybe I can make us fail the bell test.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Authors Note

Merry Christmas!

Pranks included just for my one reviewer. Thank you.

Yup, I'm pretty proud of this. I've read a lot of Naruto looped fics, but I've never read one that goes quiet like what I'm planning. Naruto is still Naruto. He still pranks and he still gets excited sometimes. But it's all more subtle. The pranks all have a deeper joke or meaning, and the excitement is hid well.

R&R plz