Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight; it is the property of Stephenie Meyer. The original characters and plot are mine. I am in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Thanks to my lovely Beta Biddy429 !!!

Chapter 15

Blood and Tears

"Okay class we are going to be reviewing for the Shakespeare test on Thursday. I have a booklet for each of you and we will work through it all in time for the test. That means ten pages a day or so" Mrs. Jacqueline said as she handed out the booklets and as I read over the questions I wanted to ask how this could possibly take three days to learn. It was basic material really and we had been lectured on it when we first started the section on Shakespeare!

Erik smirked at me and we decided to race and see who could get the furthest by the end of class. Sadly he won by 4 questions so I decided to bug him about cheating as we left the class. We had both finished over 25 pages of the booklet though I had coloured some of the diagrams so they would be easier for me to remember. Finally we agreed to a tie and parted ways.

I arrived at my next class, Maths and took my seat near Alice and got out the right books. Most of the class was running late for some reason, so even after Mr. Letson arrived the class didn't begin. A few minutes later he got up and went to look for the missing students. I looked over at Alice who smiled at me.

"I think there are a few students over looking at the mural" she said and I blushed. I mentally berated myself for not realising that everyone had to walk passed that section between classes so everyone would have seen it before lunch if not third period.

"It's only in chalk and yet everyone thinks it's near finished" I sighed as I opened my notebook to the back page and began to sketch out the mural in much greater detail. "I mean really it's a draft, nothing more" I continued as I finished the little sketch and showed it to her. "It only takes a few minutes to do, I just don't understand what everyone is getting so excited about!"

"Wow" She said as she looked at it, "Bella, it's going to look amazing when you do the final copy then" She said and I smiled nodding, "the chalk one is great too" shrugging I gave into the pixie. It wasn't worth the fight; I never really much liked the stuff I came up with. The idea was always so much better then the piece, but then again I am the only one that sees the idea.

A few minutes later everyone came back into the classroom and Mr. Letson looked at me smiling, I blushed and ducked my head hoping that he wouldn't feel the need to comment on it. All of the students gave me a 'thumbs up' or smiled at me mouthing 'wow' and I waved to them all. Praying that it would end there I flipped my notebook back to my section for notes for math and waited for the lecture to begin.

"Class, it is not acceptable to be late for class like that even if most of the student body is late, however I do understand that there was a large section of you did not see the mural this morning and many of you were surprised to see it. Ms Dwyer really should have informed the school that it would be going up today" looking at me pointedly. At that moment I just wanted to curl into a small ball and die when he said most of the student body. I raised my hand in an effort to explain myself, "Yes, Miss Dwyer?"

"Er Sir, Mr Letsonm, that isn't the finished mural, that's only the draft to get administrative approval for the design that was asked for last week" I commented without looking at anyone but Mr. Letson.

"That's a draft?" he asked shocked and all eyes were on me as I nodded.

"Yes I was working on a few ideas but a friend suggested I just draw and let the environment speak, so I was sketching on the wall when I decided to have that as the basic design of the mural. I will of course fix the errors and improve the details and structure of the piece as I do it in the proper materials" I said and everyone was staring at me as though I was insane.

"I must say that your draft has a finished and complete feel to it" he commented and I nodded. I hated when people felt the need to tell me how to do a piece unless it was before I began. "Since that is the draft I can't wait to see the finished design" I nodded when he finished glad that he wasn't going to critique my work after all. "I would however urge you Ms Dwyer to obtain consent from the school even for the draft as you would not like to have such good work destroyed for no reason" said Mr Letson.

I nodded by saying softly "Yes Mr Letson, I will do that in Art today." I hadn't thought that I would need permission to do a chalk sketch but I would definitely do so now.

"Okay back to math." The rest of the class was spent with lecture and quiet chattering about the mural. Alice smiled at me and waved before leaving class.

Sitting in history I rested my head on the desk as I waited for Jasper to arrive. I hated this class so badly that the few days it had been sunny and the Cullens and Hales had been out I almost fell asleep in this class. Thankfully I felt Jasper pull out his chair and sit down. Turning my head I smiled at him and he chuckled.

"That's what you get for doing the mural in the morning Bella" He said and I rolled my eyes and banged my head against the table a few times and he chuckled at my dramatics.

"Next time warn me against it okay?" I asked as I picked my head off the table and opened my notebook and started to add details to the mural sketch I had shown Alice.

"Is that what it's going to look like when it's done?" he asked and I nodded.

"Kinda, I imagine the umbrella blue and the rain more pronounced with the strokes for the back ground all or most being in vertical lines, I want the structure she's standing in to be really dark all around her with the background being bright" I commented as I showed him what I meant.

"It looks kinda depressing." He said as he took in the picture. I nodded I guess it kind of did look sad and lonely.

"That wasn't really what I was going for but yes you are right, it does. I just didn't want some annoying sunny mural that most people would hate. I mean this place is rainy so it fits that the mural would be rainy" I answered really looking at the picture in front of my eyes not in my head.

"I was going for real and hopeful, the background which she will go out into is bright and even though she's standing in the dark her light shows and there is colour even in that colourless place" I said realising the title of the composition could be "Colourless".

"I guess I see that" He said, "I like it nonetheless, it suits this place and your right something sunny would just be irritating"

I smiled at him and soon Mrs. White was babbling on about something random and I took my periodic notes not really paying attention. Suddenly the bell rang and I was startled and nearly leapt out of my chair. Jasper chuckled and made his way out of the class as I packed up, I always seemed to take so long compared to everyone else.

"I really like the draft, I hope they approve it" Angela said and I smiled at her. She, Erik and Ben had been really supportive while I was working on my mural ideas. None of them pushed me to do something just because they liked it. They had been de-stressing me so that I didn't freak out before I even started.

"Me too" I sighed as we walked to my locker and I changed my books then walked to the cafeteria. "Ange, Edward asked me to have lunch with him today" I said not sure if I wanted to join him. Ange spun around and stopped dead in the hall and I nearly walked into her.

"Edward Cullen asked you to eat with him?" she asked her eyes wide and I nodded mutely surprised by her reaction. "You are going to right? I know I shouldn't bug you but you two would be great together." She giggled as I stared at her open mouthed. I never realised that Ange knew I liked Edward or that she could be so insistent.

"Wow, so you approve?" I said and she blushed as I took her arm in mine and started walking again. "I'm judging from your reaction Ange that you think I should say yes?" Ange smiled at me and nodded vigorously.

"I know girly and over the top but still, have lunch with him and see if you guys get along. I mean when I saw him this morning standing next to you and offering you a ride to the hospital, it just seems right" She said as we entered the cafeteria.

She might have continued but every single student in the cafeteria stood up and began cheering. I turned to look behind me to see who the important person was that had arrived to such a welcome and just as I did so I realised that I was that person, I felt my stomach plummet down to my toes at that precise moment. I saw Jessica smiling at me from the corner of my eye, waving me to her table as though I always sat with her and I was her very best friend.

Just then I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned to see Mrs. Levington standing behind me, I blushed and she smiled at me happily. Once everyone quieted down enough for her to be able to talk to me she took my hand.

"Bella, we love the mural and cannot wait to see the finished article" She said and the noise began again this time worse than before. Everyone was cheering and I was blushing furiously but then bowed to them getting a few chuckles.

"Thank you." I said to her as she smiled and left the cafeteria. Ange and I smiled at each other as I grabbed a drink and looked for Edward. He waved to me from a table between mine and the one he sat at with his family. Walking over to him I got a few high fives and "way to go's". I smiled and returned the high fives while I continued on my way to Edward as the butterflies morphed to giant birds.

"Hi" he said as I sat across from him, everyone in the cafeteria was staring at the two of us and I finally couldn't ignore it any longer and got up and stood on the top of the table and I dramatically bowed for them. Everyone burst into laughter and I bowed again with a grin on my face.

"Thank you! It means loads that you guys like the mural so much." I managed to get the room quiet and there were a lot of cheers and whoops. "I am honoured that I was asked to do this, but honestly I probably would have eventually done one without any permission so the only difference this way is that I don't need to clean it off! This is the kind of thing I do best and everyone has a talent, most of you guys can do things that I can't, things like walking on a flat surface without your face meeting the ground!" Laughter filled the room but they seemed to get that making a big deal out of it wasn't necessary. I sat down and the cafeteria went back to something close to normal dynamics.

"Nice speech" Edward commented and I looked at him pleased.

"What can I say I will be president someday" I said shrugging, "Nah I just hate it when people make a big deal out of the fact that I draw. Other people can do amazing things too they just don't show it in the same way. I have gotten enemies by letting people treat me differently because I draw and paint" I said remembering Alexis and her meanness to Clara just because I outshined her.

"You still didn't have to do that" he said and I shrugged.

"I wanted too" I replied and looked at him as I played with the lid to my coke.

"You do that a lot. Make fun of yourself to make others more comfortable with you" he said and I shrugged again trying to formulate a response.

"Yeah, I guess so. I mean it makes me less of a threat to people and takes away the opportunity for others to make fun of me" I said actually thinking of how often I poke fun at myself. "I do it to make it harder for others to be mean. I guess." Edward looked at me as though he was saddened to hear that I made fun of myself to protect myself from other people.

"People have made fun of you?" he asked his voice angry but not at me. I nodded thinking about how many times people had felt the need to belittle me.

"Yeah, not here though. Everyone has been nice or I have prevented them from being able too. Jessica and Lauren don't like the attention I get from being new" I said and he nodded.

"So..." he said before I cut him off.

"Edward why were you avoiding me?" I asked and he looked uncomfortable. Not the best question to ask but it was the most important to me.

"It is unwise for us to be... friends." He answered and I tried to make sense of this answer.

"Because you're not entirely human?" I whispered hoping he would hear me. As he nodded saddened I reached out to touch his face and he pulled away from me. The action hurt but I could see the desire for my touch in his eyes. "I don't care, but that isn't the only thing is it?" I asked wishing he would just tell me. I was fairly certain he was a vampire or fey and either or they were immortal and not human.

"I am dangerous Bella" He answered and I looked at my hands. I couldn't decide if he had the potential to hurt me but I knew he wouldn't.

"You may very well be but I know from the few times I have been around you without you shutting me out that you mean me no harm." I answered and he looked at me angry and this time it was directed at me.

"That changes nothing" He answered and I rolled my eyes and gathered my things.

"Nice to see you Ed but I'm going to go to class now" I said turning away from him.

"I'm sorry" he said sounding upset and yet accepting, yep definitely bipolar.

"So should I meet you at your car or what?" I said turning around to look him in the eye. "Are you coming to class?" He looked pleased and displeased at the same time.

"I'm skipping today" he said playing with his apple as he spoke. I rolled my eyes again and waited for him to answer my first question. "I'll be outside your class at the end of the day" I nodded and started to walk away.

"Eddy? You really shouldn't miss your meds!" I called loudly across the cafeteria and kept walking as his mouth hung open. I giggled to myself as I walked to class. Sitting in my normal spot I waited for the class to begin. Mr. Varner came in a moment later wheeling in a cart with blood testing supplies and I paled. I had gotten over my whole faint at the sight of blood thing as a kid but I really didn't want to have to deal with blood typing today or ever really.

"Okay so there's a blood drive in Port Angeles next week so I thought it would be good for you to know..." he said and I tuned him out as I drew deep breaths and tried to think of a way to leave the room quickly. I had too many memories tied to blood and crying in class was not an option.

"Mr. Varner? I don't feel very good, can I go lie down in the nurses office?" I asked and he nodded letting me go. Although I was not feeling good, I was not that bad that I needed an escort so I made my way out of the building and sat down in front of my mural. I tried to clear my head and think of anything other than the smell of blood and......death. I closed my eyes to shut them out and let the tears flow down my face.

"Bella?" a voice called softly and I opened my eyes to look up at Edward who was looking at be worried and sad.

"Hey" I spluttered as the tears continued to fall. I focused on him and prayed that the images behind my eyes would fade. All the tests and then transfusions it all flashed before my eyes.

"You don't look so good." He said as he knelt down in front of me.

"Really I thought this was the latest runway look" I said sarcastically. "You were right to skip I really should have joined you" I said and let my head rest on the wall behind me. Wiping the tears from my face I stood up and the world twisted and I lost my balance. Edward's arms wrapped around my waist and he looked really freaked out.

"You should go to the nurse" He said and I smiled at him, pushing his arms away, even though I wanted to stay in them forever, I stood under my own strength. A head rush really wasn't anything to go to the nurse about but since I was heading there anyway.

"That's where I was going actually" I said and he walked with me as we went to the office. I felt tired and wanted to curl into a ball and cry.

"Maybe I should just take you home" Edward suggested and for a moment I thought that sounded good.

"No, doctor's appointment" I answered and he smiled at me.

"We could go now and then I could take you home" He suggested and I nodded that sounded good to me. He opened the office doors and I continued to cry so that it would be easier to offer a reason to go home.

"Mrs. Cope?" I asked my voice cracking. She looked at me startled and shocked.

"Oh dear! Are you okay Bella?" she asked and I shook my head.

"I'm having a hard day and I was wondering if it would be okay if I went home early, I've got a hospital appointment today also that I need to go to" I said, my voice shaking. She nodded immediately and looked over at Edward.

"Are you going to take her Edward?" she asked and I noticed that she batted her eyelashes at him as she did so. It was amusing but I didn't let it show on my face.

"Yes, she got a lift to school today as her car is off the road and she is not well enough to travel on the bus" He answered his voice irritated but polite. I wonder how often Mrs. Cope flirted with him.

"That is sweet of you. I hope you feel better tomorrow Bella." She called as Edward led me out of the office. My tears stopped immediately and I brushed them from my face. Edward's presence made me feel better so I smiled at him and he did a double take.

"What? I can act if it's needed and I feel better now that I'm away from the blood." I said as I walked towards his car.

"You are an excellent actress Bella. Where did you learn such a gift?" he asked as he chuckled and followed after me. I stopped and thought about where I had learned to lie, where I had gotten over my blood equals fainting reaction. Edward must have notice the abrupt shift and was rubbing my arms as he retracted his question.

"In the hospital. I learned a lot of things in the hospital" I answered and my voice cracked for real this time. Edward looked angry and understanding which made me wonder if Carlisle had told him.

"Why were you in the hospital?" he asked and I looked at him and then tried to calm down.

"Don't make a stupid assumption Edward, you tell me why we shouldn't be friends and I'll tell you why." I said knowing I was being weird and mean.

"Sorry" I said as he opened the passenger door for me.

"It is I who am sorry Bella. I didn't mean to assume but I am curious about you" He answered as he slipped into the driver's seat. I nodded and the ride to the hospital was short and silent.

He parked the car and I got out and walked up to the entrance stiff and unsure. Finally I stopped before the door and walked away from the entrance and sat down on a bench. I hated hospitals now and today it was too close to my thoughts. Edward sat beside me and looked concerned.

"I hate hospitals" I said blankly and Edward looked at me uncertain what the right response was. "I've spent so much time in and near one that now it just hurts to think about it." I said more to myself than him.

"I wish I could say that you didn't have to go in but you have an appointment." He said and I nodded.

"I know. And I'm not running away. It just reminds me of everything I've lost. I hate it. Hospitals aren't happy places for me, not even when they should be. For me people go in and never come out. Each is an opportunity to loose someone and I can't stand it!"I whispered as tears rolled down my face, hot and relentless. Edward rubbed my back and said nothing.

After a few minutes I finally stopped crying and I looked over at Edward, he nodded and stood up, he held his hand out to me and I took it gladly and we walked into the hospital.