The Secret Circle:

Out of the Darkness

The Secret Circle and its characters aren't mine – they belong to L. J. Smith and HarperCollins Publishers.

Chapter Eight

"Sean, are you ready? It's time to go," Cassie said from the doorway.

Go? Where? Sean stared at Cassie blankly.

"We're all meeting at the beach. For the ceremony. Are you ready?"

Sean felt the blood drain from his face. Mutely, he shook his head. He couldn't face his memories again. Not even in a ceremony.

Cassie walked into the bedroom and sat in the chair beside the bed. "It'll be okay," she said. "Nobody's going to make you talk about anything you aren't ready to talk about. I promise."

Sean looked away.

"Please, just come to the beach with us. You don't have to say anything at the ceremony if you don't want to."

"I don't," he said shortly.

"But will you come to the beach?"

He hesitated for a long moment, and nodded.

* * *

The other Circle members were already there. Someone had placed a circle of quartz crystals on the sand, surrounding a ring of unlit candles and a small fire. Sean froze, staring at it in horror. There hadn't been another death that he was responsible for and didn't remember … had there?

He looked around at the others. They were standing around, talking with each other, waiting. They weren't surrounding him. He could run away, this time. But he doubted he'd get far before they caught him and dragged him back.

"All right, we're all here," Diana said. "Come on inside."

Sean shook his head nervously and involuntarily stepped away. Diana looked at him. So did Laurel and Deborah and Chris. But nobody tried to grab him, to keep him from running. Nobody was accusing him of anything. And nobody dragged him inside the quartz circle.

Nor was anyone waiting for him to enter the quartz circle. Diana stepped through the gap left between two of the crystals and sat down. Laurel, Cassie, and the other members of the Circle followed her. The circle was much bigger this time – big enough for the entire Circle to sit inside, around the candles and the fire.

Hesitantly, Sean followed Suzan inside the circle and sat between her and Deborah, trying to keep an eye on everyone at the same time. Raj lay down just outside the Circle, watching them, with his head resting on his front paws.

Faye placed a crystal in the gap through which everyone had entered the circle.

Diana began the casting of the circle.

"Powers of Earth, be with us in our Circle," she began, walking around the circle just inside the ring of crystals, carrying a small tangerine quartz crystal.

"Powers of Air, be with us in our Circle," Cassie said, following Diana's path with an osprey's feather in her hand.

"Powers of Fire, be with us in our Circle." Faye made the next circuit, carrying a lit candle.

"Powers of Water, be with us in our Circle." Diana made the final circuit, carrying a small bowl of seawater. She thanked the directions and the elements for joining them, and asked for their support for a circle of healing.

Sean was trembling. He wanted to run, to be anywhere but in the circle, but he didn't run. He stayed where he was and turned his gaze to the fire.

"We stopped Black John – and a hurricane," Laurel said. "And we're not even old enough to vote. It wasn't easy, but we did it. And nobody was killed, and no one was badly hurt. But I've had more than one nightmare about that night. And I want to remember the good in my dreams – our success at working together and defeating him." Laurel lit the white candle in front of her.

"I've had a few nightmares too," Deborah said as she lit her own candle.

Sean stared at her. He hadn't expected Deborah to admit to any weakness.

She grinned at him, wryly. "I wouldn't mind dreaming about the good parts of that day, like Laurel said, instead of the scary parts. But what I really want healed is this blasted arm. I want to ride my Harley again."

There were laughs around the Circle.

Then Cassie spoke up. She told them about how scared she had been to face Black John – her father. About how terrified she had felt – how helpless – when he had tried to get inside her mind – and later, when she found out how Black John's return had affected her mother's mind. And she told them about the sense of belonging, of power, of strength, that she felt when the Circle chose her to be their leader; the feelings that were strengthened when she put on the Master Tools – and when the Circle, all of them, gave her their support when she – when they all – fought, and defeated, Black John.

She was talking to everyone, and to no one in particular – but she glanced at Sean, and then at Faye, when she spoke of them all fighting and defeating Black John.

Sean knew, of course, that he had, in the end, joined the Circle. He had helped the other members of the Circle defeat Black John. It had taken all twelve of them. But he hadn't joined them until after he had killed three people – and after the Circle had captured him, purified him from Black John's influence, and directly asked him whether he was going to join them or join Black John. He hadn't been able to resist Black John's commands – any more than he had ever been able to resist Faye's, or Adam's. Or Cassie's – but she hadn't really given him a command. She'd mentally yelled his name to get his attention, but she used her regular voice to tell him to put his hand down.

But he had joined them, then – and he had helped them defeat Black John. He was a Witch – a full-blood Witch. He wasn't powerful like the others – but he didn't care about that, not really. He didn't need to light fires without matches or douse them with water without using a hose or a bucket. He didn't need to move things without touching them. He didn't need to know exactly what other people were thinking. He didn't want to control other people's minds.

He wasn't an expert on herbs and plants, like Laurel, or gems and minerals, and computers, like Melanie; he couldn't fix just about anything with a motor, like Nick. Nor could he draw or paint, like Suzan and Diana. And he lacked the inner strength and self-confidence that all of the older members of the Circle – and now Cassie, too – seemed to have.

But Cassie hadn't had any Powers when she first came to New Salem, or if she had, she hadn't known how to use them. She didn't even know she was a Witch. She, too, had lacked confidence, then. She had seemed almost as shy and high-strung as he. The first time he'd seen Cassie, he had been waiting outside with Chris and Doug and Faye and the others for school to start; Cassie had been walking up the path to the east entrance. She stopped when she saw them standing outside, and ducked back around the corner to avoid them. And then at her locker – she screamed when she saw Faye's doll hanging inside.

But she hadn't screamed when she faced Black John. She hadn't even hesitated when she realized that she had to stand up to him alone. In just a few months, she had not only begun to develop her powers, and learned how to use her mental voice to communicate over long distances and to give commands, and to call on Fire, like Faye; she had developed such strength and assurance that she had successfully led the whole Circle to defeat Black John.

What if he could learn, too? Not to lead the Circle, of course, or to become as powerful and confident as the other members of the Circle. But what if he could learn to defend himself, to protect his mind from attack? He doubted he'd ever be strong enough to resist someone as powerful as Black John, but he could try. And shouldn't he at least be able to shield his mind from the other members of his own Circle?

Adam and Nick and Cassie and the others had blamed the hematite on his belt buckle for his susceptibility to Black John's mental control. They told him that it had decreased his resistance. But he had never been able to resist Adam's or Faye's commands, even before his father gave him that belt – and they weren't, and never had been, nearly as powerful as Black John. Sean wasn't wearing hematite now. He never would again, no matter how much "iron strength" it was supposed to give him. But regardless of what stones or crystals he was or wasn't wearing, he doubted he'd be able to resist the next time Faye or Adam or Cassie – or anyone else – tried to control his mind. Not now. But maybe he could learn. Maybe there was some sort of a spell that could help him.

He hadn't really paid much attention to the Books of Shadows before. He'd helped the others look through everybody's houses for books, papers, and stuff like that. He found his own family's Book hidden among other old documents. He had glanced through it – seen the archaic script, barely legible to his eyes; noticed the peculiar spelling; seen the spells, and the records of rituals, ceremonies, and family events – but he hadn't studied it or learned its spells. Maybe there was some kind of spell in there that would help him shield his mind from someone who was trying to influence him. If so, and if he could learn and perform that spell, then he could make sure that nobody would make him do anything against his will, ever again.

I'm going to find out, Sean decided. He would read the Book of Shadows that had belonged to his ancestors. And he would learn how to shield his mind. His father would be upset if he found out that Sean was learning new spells and practicing magic, even if he had meant what he'd said before about the Circle doing the right thing by destroying Black John. Mr. Dulany hated magic. But that didn't matter. Sean was going to do whatever it took to be sure that no one ever took over his mind again. No matter what his father, or anybody else, said.

Sean realized with a start that everybody was watching him. He felt himself flush. He looked down. A glowing circle of candles stood in front of them; the one in front of him was the only unlit candle.

Nick offered him a box of matches.

Sean accepted it. He didn't say anything, but he struck a match and lit the candle in front of him.

"I think it's time to close the Circle, unless anyone has something to add," Cassie said, looking around the Circle.

Nobody did.

"Okay, then. Powers of the Earth, we thank you for being here with us, for giving us your support, your power, your strength," Cassie began, as she sprinkled sand widdershins around the circle. She thanked the other elements for their assistance as she closed the circle with feather, candle, and water.

"Merry meet, and merry part, and merry meet again," Diana said after Cassie finished closing the circle.

The other Circle members echoed her words.

Sean almost laughed at the irony of the traditional closing. There had been nothing merry about this meeting.

But it had given him – something. An idea of something positive to focus on – and, perhaps, a way to, if not atone for what he had done, at least ensure that it would never happen again.