It Means Something

Bella

"I wonder, if I made it clear how important it it to pay attention in my class." Mrs. Cullen barks out. "Because, it looks like some of you forgot that fact."

I inwardly cringe as Mrs. Cullen approaches our lab station.

"Nice job," she says as she places my paper facedown in front of me and then turns to EJ. "For someone who wants to be a Chemistry teacher in the future, you're doing a poor job of showing it. I defended you earlier today because you were right but I will not tolerate someone who isn't prepared for my class. Please see me after class, Mr. Masen."

I don't understand why she didn't rip me a new one.

I turn my paper around and find a big red A on the top of it. What the hell? I rub my eyes and readjust them. But, there's no mistake. There's an A on top of the exam that should have been an F.

It takes me less than a second to realize what happened to my failed exam. I lean over towards EJ and find my proof, he's tucking my F test into his book.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Why the hell did you do that for?" I immediately ask once EJ steps out Mrs. Cullen's classroom.

I end up following him down the hallway and standing beside his locker, where he's paying little, if any, attention to me. "Masen!"

"I don't know what you're talking about," he answers with a long dramatic sigh.

Ass. "You switched our tests."

He slams his locker shut and towers over me. "It's not a big deal."

He proceeds to walk away, as if thinking that will get me to drop this. I follow after him as he walks out the door and into the parking lot.

"EJ!" I say breathless as he mounts his motorcycle.

"You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"No."

"Well, then I hope you enjoy disappointment." Feeling fidegty under his intense stare, I curl my hair behind my ears. He slips on his helmet and starts fishing through his bag. Pulling out a spare helmet, he throws it to me, "Hop on."

"What?" I ask dumbly, awkwardly holding the gray helmet.

"Hop on. If you want to thank me for saving your ass in class, come home with me. I wasn't kidding around yesterday. You showed me your life, now I'll show you mine."

"But we have two classes left in the day, EJ."

"Ditching is healthy." He shrugs, "Live a little, Bella."

I scan the parking lot. Some people are looking our way, probably ready to spread gossip on me talking to EJ. If I actually leave with him, rumors will fly.

"Don't be afraid of what they think," EJ says softly, revving his motorcycle and lowering the face mask on his helmet.

I take in the mere sight of him. From his ripped jeans and leather jacket to the black and red bandanna he has hanging out his back pocket. I should be terrified of him, but then I remember how he was with Aaron last night and all the fear is gone.

I look back at the crowd and spot Mike walking over towards us from the other side of the lot.

It's now or never, Bella.

I readjust my backpack, slip on the helmet and in one quick fluid motion, I straddle his motorcycle.

"Hold on tight," he says pulling my hands around his waist. The simple feel of his strong hands resting on top of mine is enough to set my stomach a flutter. He deliberately brushes the tips of his fingers over mine before reaching for the handlebars.

Oh. My. Fucking. God. What am I getting myself into?

As we speed away from the school parking lot, I hear my name being yelled over the roar of the bike. The speed of the motorcycle startles me and I tighten my grip around EJ's rock-hard abs.

The feel of the wind rushing past us is exhilarating and terrifying. I feel as if I could almost do anything.

He stops at a red light and I lean back to take in the sight of the Williamsburg Bridge. Its mid-day so there isn't much traffic traveling from Manhattan to Brooklyn.

I hear him chuckle when he guns the engine once more as the light turns green. I clutch his waist and bury my face in his back. I watch as we pass the border that divides our worlds and we enter his.

When he finally stops, we're in front of the project building that Alice lives in. He tells me to hop off and wait for him there while he goes to park his bike down by the garage works at.

Removing my helmet, I examine the cluster of tan four floor buildings. I look so out of place in my navy Burberry trench coat and Aldo ankle boots.

"Hey shorty!" I heard someone yell. "Are you lost, or just looking for thrill on the other side of the tracks?"

I turn rapidly, almost succeeding in giving myself whiplash, to see who spoke to me. Leaning against the gate of the building was a group of guys all dressed in baggy pants and hooded sweaters, with a black and blue bandanna hanging out their left back pocket.

One stood out more than the others. He was the only light skinned guy in the group. He was tall and lean, with his camouflage sweater wide open giving you a perfect view of his sculpted chest. He had short dirty-blond hair with crystal blue eyes and a cigarette hanging from his lips.

He would have been beautiful, if it wasn't for the most terrifying feeling I had creeping up my spine from his intense stare.

He pulled his cigarette out off his mouth and stomped it into the pavement before walking towards me.

"What's your name?" he asked once he was close enough. I didn't answer, forgetting my voice for a second. "Come'on sweetie, I won't bite. What's your name?"

I let out a huge breath I didn't know I was holding and attempted a small smile, "Bella."

"I'm James," he smiles, eyeing me up and down. "You're not from around here are you, Bella?"

"No," I say softly, shifting the helmet and pulling my coat closed.

"Well sweetheart, I can always show you around."

James was stalking closer to me by the second, and I had half a mind to knee him in the groin and run away. But before I could come up with the right moment to strike, I heard my name being called.

"Bella!" EJ yelled, effectively stopping James' advances. EJ came from behind me and pushed himself protectively in front of me. "Jay," he tilted his head in greeting.

James, didn't take his eyes off me as he greeted EJ back. "What's up, E? I was just talking to the lovely Bella before you rudely interrupted. Now, I thought your ma' taught you manners."

"Your talk is over," EJ growled menacingly. "She's with me."

James gaze rapidly shifted to glare at EJ, "I would watch it, Masen. You don't want to be outnumbered." James glanced quickly back at his group of friends.

"You got it," EJ grunted. "We're leaving now."

EJ pulled me quickly behind him as he walked into the buildings front door. I stole one more glance back at James before the door closed.

He was smiling widely and winked. "See you soon, Bella."

"Who was that?" I asked softly, climbing the stairs.

"James," EJ sneered. He turned swiftly and looked down at me from his higher step, "Don't ever go near him again. He's Crip and leader of the set in the next building. We've had a constant rivalry that extends farther then which gang we belong too. If you think I'm dangerous, he's nothing compared to what I can do."

An involuntary shiver ran down my spine. "Okay, I'll stay away."

"Good." The conversation officially ended there and he continued up the steps and onto the fourth floor of the building.

I could sense his wariness as he opened his apartment door and led me inside. "Well, this is it," he said slowly, motioning inside.

The living room was smaller than any room in my house, with tan walls and a black and blue futon against one wall and an orange armchair next to it. On the opposite wall is a medium sized TV with a rack of dvds next to it.

I walk around the small space, and sudden feel all warm and cozy. The walls are covered in picture frames. The layout isn't much different than Ally's apartment.

I examined each frame with curiosity. There's many of EJ and an older but very beautiful woman, she was a head shorter than him with the same hair color but lighter green eyes.

"Is that your mom?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yeah," he said, coming up behind me and scratching his neck. "She's... um..."

"Gorgeous."

EJ laughed, "Yeah, Jazz thinks so too."

"Ha! I bet he loves staying over when she's here." I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror on the opposite wall. I absently run my fingers through my hair.

"You're always doing that."

"Doing what?"

"Fixing yourself – your hair or makeup."

"What's wrong with me trying to look good?" I ask confused.

"Nothing," he shrugs and then raises an eyebrow. "Unless it becomes an obsession. Is it so important that people think you're beautiful?"

I fumble around with my hands, "I don't care what people think about me."

"Because you are," he says, taking out his chemistry text book. "Beautiful, I mean."

I'm suddenly very uncomfortable in my own skin and especially in this conversation. "Where's your room?" I blurt out. "A bedroom can say a lot about a person."

He gestures towards a doorway at the far end of a narrow hallway. His walls were painted brown, and there was a huge queen sized wood framed bed taking up much of the space. There was a cork board with random pictures of his friends, including one of Roxanne. He had clothes thrown over two folding chairs and a small nightstand hiding his guitar and skateboard.

"You ride?" I giggled picking up his skateboard and rolling the wheels.

"Don't look so surprised, Bella," he scoffed, snatching it away and proceeding to do a small ollie.

I clapped my hands in mock enthusiasm before snatching it back, "I know how to cruise, my brother taught me. I can't do a trick to save my life though."

"Wow," he chuckled in surprise. "Who knew, Isabella Swan, could ride a skateboard."

"No one, besides Aaron does." I place his skateboard back where I found it and take one more good look around his room, "This wasn't what I was expecting."

"Well, what were you expecting?"

I shrug and sit on his messy bed, "For someone that doesn't care about anything, your room is very... warm."

He sits down next to mean and sighs heavily, "I care about a lot of things. Just not the same things you care about."

"Don't you want to see the world? Maybe, start your own life?"

"I'm not leaving Brooklyn – ever."

It was my turn to sigh, "Don't you want to go college and get a degree?"

"You see college as an escape."

"Escape," I'm baffled. "You have no clue what I consider an escape. I'm going to a college that's close to my brother. First it was NYU, now it's the University of Washington. My life is dictated by my parents decisions on where they send my brother. You want the easy way out, you stay here."

"You think it's easy being the man of the house? Shit, making sure my mom doesn't get involved with some loser or Jazz and Luis don't get themselves killed, or if Lyric and Ally have enough to get through the week. It's hard."

"I'm sorry."

He sneered, "Don't ever pity me."

"No," I say, finally meeting his eyes. "I'm sorry that someone so young and smart has to bare the responsibility of taking care of others, when he should be taking care of himself."

He stands back up, completely shutting me out. "You done with the psychoanalysis?"

Is this what he meant by 'his demons'?

For the next few hours, we sit on his couch and hatch a plan for our hand warmers. He's a lot smarter than I'd realized, that A on his test wasn't a fluke.

He has many ideas about how we can research online and get information from the library on how to construct the hand warmers and various uses for them to incorporate in our paper.

We need chemicals, which Mrs. Cullen will provide, Ziploc bags to enclose the chemicals, and fabric to enclose the Ziploc bags.

I purposely keep the discussion on chemistry, careful not to get into anything too personal.

As I close my textbook, out of the corner of my eye I see EJ run his hand through his hair, lightly tugging on the ends of it. "I didn't mean to be rude to you before."

"It's okay. I get it."

"You're right."

I start to stand, feeling uncomfortable. He grabs my arm and pulls me back down.

"No," he groans. "I mean you're right about me. I don't take care of myself."

"Why?" I ask, genuinely curious.

"Ever since my dad left," he starts, squeezing his eyes shut. "I've felt the need to purposely bare the weight he carried on my shoulders. And not only of our family, but of those around me. I always do what others want, never what I want."

"And what do you want right now?" Right now, I want to heal this broken boy.

He touches my cheek with the tips of his fingers and my face lights on fire from his touch.

"Do you want to kiss me, Edward?" My breathing hitches when I realize I called him by his given name.

"Bella, I want nothing more than to kiss you right now." He smiles softly, "Do you want me to kiss you? Nobody else has to know."

Edward

Bella's tongue slips out to wet her perfect heart-shaped lips, which are now shiny and oh, so inviting.

"Don't tease me like that," I whisper, my lips mere inches from hers.

"What if it means something?" she asks softly.

"What if it does?"

Her eyes are downcast before she looks back at me, "Promise me it won't mean anything."

I lips ghost hers and I can feel her warm breath fan across my face, "It won't mean anything."

Aren't I supposed to be the guy in this scenario, laying down the no commitment rules?

"No tongue."

I chuckle, tracing her jaw with my mouth and reach the shell of her ear.

"Love," I whisper as she shivers in response, "If I kiss you, I can guarantee you there's going to be tongue."

She hesitates and I feel her start to pull back.

"It won't mean anything," I assure her again.

As her eyelids close and she leans closer, I realize it's going to happen. The girl of my dreams, the girl who is more like me than anyone I've ever met, wants to kiss me.

I can't help but take over as soon as she tilts her head towards me. Our lips touch for the softest kiss before I lace my fingers in her hair and start kissing her soft and gentle.

My body urges me to take advantage of the situation, but my brain (the one in my head) keeps me in check.

A satisfied sigh escapes Bella's lips and if only for a moment, I feel as if she's content just staying in my arms forever.

I slowly brush the tip of my tongue across her moist, pink, bottom lip. Willing her to open her mouth and let me in.

She slowly opens her mouth and meets my tongue with hers. Our mouths and tongues mingle in a slow, erotic dance for a minute before the heat starts to build.

I can feel her kisses become more passionate as she grabs hold of my shirt and pulls herself onto my lap. For a second I didn't know how to react.

I pulled back to look at her quickly. Her eyes were hooded and she smiled shyly. That was the only reassurance I needed before I attacked her lips with mine again.

We continued for a moment before the sound of my front door opening made her jerk away.

I'm pissed. First, for losing myself in that kiss. Second, for wanting the moment to last forever. And lastly, for my ma coming home at the most awful time.

I watch as Bella tries to reach for her books that fell sometime during that kiss. My mother is standing in the doorway with a small smirk on her face.

"Hey, Ma," I say slowly, more flustered than I should be.

It was only a kiss, Masen. Get it together, asshole.

From the smart-ass look on my mom's face, I know she's amused. She drops her bag and keys on the small kitchen table and composes herself.

"Are you going to introduce me to your friend, Edward?" She asks, fighting a smile.

I feel like that kid who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Except I got caught with my hand itching it's way up Bella's shirt.

Screw cookies. I'll take Bella any day.

Bella stands swiftly and extends her hand towards my mom, "Hi, Mrs. Masen, my name is Bella Swan."

My mom studies her hand for a second before reaching and pulling her in for a hug. "Mrs. Masen, was my mother-in-law dear and thank goodness I'm not that old bat. Please call me Liz."

Woah! Rewind and freeze.

'Liz', my mom never lets any of my friends call her Liz, except Ally but my mom helped raise her so it's understandable.

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Liz." Bella smiles her 'world peace' smile.

My mom puts her arm around Bella's shoulders and leads her back to the couch. They sit with my mother now in between us.

"Edward, be a dear and get your mom something to drink." Liz asks with an innocent smile.

With a permanent look of disbelief on my face, I got up and walked to the fridge.

What the hell just happened? My mother just caught me making out with a girl on her couch and she's not going crazy. The one time I brought Roxy over, my mom took one look at her and never allowed her back in this house since. Roxy didn't even speak, and my mom already knew they wouldn't get along.

I guess it's a good thing, Roxy did do me dirty. It's also good that my mom never found out why we broke up or Roxanne would have woken up missing limbs.

'No one hurts her baby boy.'

I love my mom but she's a little bit scary sometimes. I got my mom and Bella a glass of my grandma's ice tea and headed back into the living room.

"And there he was in my red heels and my black halter dress," my mom howled with laughter along with Bella.

Shit!

"Mom," I groaned, handing them both their glasses and taking a seat in the armchair. "Please, tell me you didn't tell Bella the story about the time when Ally decided to dress me like a girl."

"Oh, shut up," she chided, while Bella tried to reign in her giggles. "I was lucky though," she turned back to Bella. "I was a very young mother and I figured it was going to be hell to raise a child and still only be a teenager myself but Edward, was something else. He was so well behaved and sweet, he was literally my angel."

I smiled softly as my mom spoke of me so highly. At least I knew at one point I made her happy and proud.

"Would you like to see baby pictures of him, Bella?"

My smile dropped and I shook my head at Bella. She completely ignored me and nodded her head at my mother, "Yes, please."

My mom disappeared quickly into her bed room, leaving Bella and I alone.

"Why? Why? Why?" I groaned, throwing my arms up in defeat.

"Whatever are you talking about, EJ?" she smirked playfully.

I've never seen this Bella before. It seemed that the giant stick she had shoved up her ass disappeared. She looked light – carefree. And even though I don't belong in her world, right now it appeared like she belonged in mine.

"Why did you agree to the horrible torture of baby pictures?"

"It's not causing me torture, Edward," she corrected. "It's causing you torture."

"I found it!" My mother yelled cheerfully.

She came bounding in with an album I recognized all to well. Edward Anthony Masen Jr. year one and two.

"Ma', not the blond years."

They totally ignored me as they started flipping through the pages. Once and a while a squeal would erupt from one of them, other than that it was quiet whispering.

It was pretty quiet until Bella shrieked loudly, "Oh my God! EJ, you were blond."

"Yeah. Yeah," I huffed, crossing my arms. "I was blond until I was about five years old, then my hair changed into this weird reddish brown like my mom's."

"Were you blond too?" Bella asked my mom.

"Nope. I was born with red hair. I think he got the blond from his father, Edward. Edward's hair was a very light brown color."

Bringing up my father, sent an uneasy feeling in my stomach and suddenly the room went quiet.

"Oh!" My mom jumped off the couch suddenly. "It's almost five. Bella, darling would you like to stay for dinner?"

"W-Well, I-I should r-really..." she stammered.

I chuckled loudly, "Bella, stay." I rolled my eyes. "Ma' likes to so off her cooking skills whenever given the chance."

Something was very different about all this. I wasn't used to it being more than my mother and I for dinner. But with Bella here it was certainly very different, though very right at the same time.

"Bella, did Edward tell you he could play the guitar?" my mom asked walking towards the kitchen.

Bella smiled sweetly. "Yes, he did."

Damn, I know where this is going. 3... 2... 1...

"Edward, why don't you play something for Bella while I cook dinner."

"No, Liz th-"

I cut her off, "She'll keep insisting until I play." A few moments later I had my guitar in my hands and I was sitting back down in the armchair.

"Really, EJ, you don't have to," Bella whispered.

I winked at her then yelled towards my mom, "What do you want me to play?"

I could hear the knife making contact with the cutting board as she answered, "How about the pretty but sad one."

Bella looked confused, "I thought you said you couldn't compose lyrics to go with your melodies."

"I can't. But I can read sheet music and memorize other songs and just play covers of them for my mom. She really likes 'Broken by Lifehouse' for some reason."

"Oh, I love that song." Bella perked up and gave me her full attention.

"Don't laughed," I warned as I began to strum the opening cords of the song

The broken clock it a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight. Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time. I am here still waiting though I still have my doubts. I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out.

I don't know why I thought I could get Bella Swan to fall for me. What the hell did I have to give her, that Mike can't?

An apartment in Brooklyn, with a beautiful view of the handball courts. Give me a break, she deserves more than that.

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head. I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead. I still see your reflection inside of my eyes. That are looking for purpose, they're still looking for life.

The stupid bet still hung in the air. A bet I made before I knew this wonderfully broken girl in front of me. A bet I regret making, but because I'm an ass, I will still more than likely honor.

I'm hanging on another day. Just to see what you throw my way. And I'm hanging on the words you say. You said that I will be okay.

The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone. I may have lost my way now, haven't forgotten my way home.

My mom thinks she's slick, making me sing a song that somehow relates to all of us.

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing. With a broken heart that's still beating. In the pain, there is healing. In your name, I find meaning. So I'm holding on, I'm holding on, I'm holding on. I'm barely holding on to you.

Dinner passed without a hitch. Bella and my mom monopolized most of the conversation. And I could already tell my more loved Bella.

"You're mom is amazing," Bella says to me as we walked to the garage.

"I know," I laughed. "And she treated you great considering the position she found us in."

Bella's posture stiffens, "That shouldn't have happened?"

Damn. "What? The kiss or the fact that you liked it?"

"I have a boyfriend."

"You trying to convince me or yourself?" I ask sarcastically.

"Don't turn this around on me. I just had an amazing time with your mother, EJ. But I don't want to upset everyone else. I'm just confused."

My mind is telling me to shut the fuck up but at the same time I'm still talking. "I don't get it. He treats you like you're a prize."

I'm a fucking hypocrite. Don't I get a prize if I nail her?

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"Well then tell me, damn it. 'Cause that kiss and the dinner and that stupid fucking song all meant something. You know it as well as I do. I dare you to tell me it didn't."

"I-I can't. It can't."

"Damn it, Bella. I brought you into my home. My mom enjoyed your company and didn't kick you out when she saw you on my lap. You heard me play! I only play for my mom and Lyric. It all means something, something good."

There's a long brittle silence. I catch a flicker of sadness in her chocolate brown eyes, but then it's gone. In an instant her expression stills and grows serious.

I point to the bike, "Get on and I'll take you back to the school to get your car."

Silently, Bellastraddles my motorcycle. She held herself so far away from me I could barely tell if she was even behind me.

She treats her brother with patience and adoration. I admire her for that.

It started because of the simple chase. Something programed into every male's DNA, want what you can't have.

Now it's so much more. She's so much more. The girl I once accused if being self-absorbed is not one-dimensional. She's just like me. Fighting her own personal demons everyday, and so far doing a good job at it.

As much as I hate to admit it, today really did mean something.

Somehow, being with Bella brings something to my life that was missing, something right.

But how am I going to convince her of that?

Hey Everyone!

First I would like to say give huge thanks for reading this story. I can't tell you how much it means to me. You guys are my reason for living.

(j/k – no really!)

Quick question for my readers: Does anyone know how to make cool banner's or cover art because I would love cover art for this story but my computer doesn't have the software to do it and that really sucks!!

x Twilithian. Victoriax has nominated The Perfect Bond in the 2009 Twilight Awards for "Best fanfic in progress", "Best Edward & Bella" and "Best AH"

(x Twilithian. Victoriax: Thanks so much for loving my story enough to do that.)

Stella, the administrator of the forum The Two Sides Of Twilight, here in FanFiction, says that I need atleast 2 – 3 more votes to make it into the finally poll.

So, if you would like to see this story up in the 2009 Twilight Awards, I would love it if you nominated it too.

To Nominate go to http:// forum (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/topic/66481/20624122/1

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