Carnations and Roses
The sunset would be in two hours or less, the birds making their final search for food before the owls took over the trees, their eyes searching both the skies and ground for movement. Hoss and Adam rode home together after checking the herd and Adam related his examination of the closest mine "It needs some work to make it safe to reopen—new shoring and there was a recent cave-in that needs clearing. I imagine the other two are in the same condition."
"We've sorta ignored the mines since we had that accident and lost those men. Eight of 'em. Pa said the Union be damned; he wasn't riskin' any more mens' lives just to hand the silver over to politicians who don't give a damn 'bout nothin' but makin' themselves richer." Hoss looked about. "He got kinda angry 'bout things and all the men dyin' and worryin' 'bout you all the time. I'd wake up hungry at night and there'd he be, sittin' and worryin'. He was havin' a bad time of it. Sometimes I'd talk 'im into havin' a glass of milk and a piece of pie with me but most times, he'd just head back upstairs real slow. I worried 'bout him a lot, me and Hop Sing both."
"Yeah. He seems to be a lot older than when I left," Adam replied. "The good thing is, we're solvent."
"We're what?"
"Solvent. Can pay our bills. No one's coming to take the Ponderosa."
"Well, that's good 'cause ain't this the most beautiful country you ever saw?"
"Yeah," Adam replied. "Steals your heart away." Adam looked around. He had always cherished their land but since he had returned, he realized just how important it was.
"Sure does," Hoss answered, "just like a beautiful woman." Hoss sighed. "But looks like I'll be livin' here with just my dear old daddy all his life and the rest of mine 'til it's all handed over to Joe's children. That's part of the reason I can't never wait to see my niece and nephews 'cause I don't have none of my own and prob'ly never will. The twins got a birthday comin' up in a few months and for the life of me, I can't think of nothin' to get them."
"Hoss, what's all this talk about you never marrying? Hell, you're younger than me and I haven't come to that point yet." Adam watched Hoss' face but Hoss only thrust out his chin and said nothing. Adam knew to wait; if it was important, Hoss would talk after weighing his words.
After a few more seconds passed, Hoss continued. "I thought I was gonna marry 'bout two years ago but she left without even sayin' goodbye. Don't know what I did to cause it."
Adam knew not to say anything flippant or treat the matter as insignificant; Hoss had fought his emotions to tell him. Adam's mind raced trying to think of who it might be. "Maybe you did nothing. Who was she?"
Hoss let out a deep breath of relief. At last, he could finally talk about it. "Carolyn Murphy."
"I don't…"
"No, you don't know 'er—maybe I really didn't neither. She came to Virginia City 'bout three years ago now I guess, said she was 'scapin' the fightin'. Carolyn. She sure was pretty, Adam. Granted, she weren't no great beauty like Melinda nor nothin' like that and she had to work in the Sazerac 'cause she was all alone 'cept for her son who was livin' with her ma in Idaho. I did like 'er, Adam. I think I even loved 'er. Courted her and brought her out to see Pa. He liked her too and so one night, I asked 'er to marry me, told her I wanted to adopt her boy and bring 'im to the Ponderosa—her ma too if she wanted. Joked maybe her ma and Pa would fall in love and marry and then we'd be husband and wife and also brother and sister! She laughed at that. Her boy was 'bout seven then, named Matthew. She called him Matty but said he didn't like that too much—insisted on Matt." Hoss smiled to himself.
"I'm assuming she turned you down," Adam said.
"No. She said yes, was so happy she'd finally be able to keep 'er boy with 'her. Adam, I know I had woman trouble in the past but I thought this was it. She weren't no snow-white lily or nothin' but then she weren't my first neither. I thought she loved me. You know, a man can always tell."
"Yeah," Adam said quietly. "A man can tell. What happened to make her leave?"
"Don't know, Adam. I mean ever'thin' was okay. The pastor read the banns one Sunday mornin' and ever'body was happy for me, happy for us. Pa was tellin' a joke around 'bout how he'd have a ready-made grandson along with another daughter. Mrs. Bannin' invited Caroline over for tea—you know how women are with fancy china and lace napkins, little cookies and cakes and such. said she and Melinda should get to know each other bein' as how they'd soon be sisters. I was standin' with Carolyn in the church yard when Mrs. Bannin' said she'd help 'er plan the weddin' since Carolyn didn't have no family or nothin' here. That was real nice of her. Then the day after the tea, Carolyn just up and left. Ted at the Sazerac said she came in with her satchel, dressed for travel, asked for her pay and left on the stage. Never said where she was goin' and I never knew why she left. Just gone."
"Did you ask Melinda if Carolyn said anything about leaving?"
"Course I did. Melinda said they had a nice time and Carolyn was excited 'bout the weddin' and the dress Mrs. Banning was goin' to help her with. Melinda was puzzled as me when I told her Carolyn had left. Couldn't believe it."
Adam and Hoss were heading around the barn and Adam asked. "Did you ask Mrs. Banning?" His gut told him it was she who was responsible for the departure of Carolyn Morgan.
"No. I didn't…. Hey, Adam. There's a buggy from Lawson's Livery. Someone's visitin' from town."
"Huh. Wonder who?" They both dismounted and Adam held out the reins. "Put the horses up, will'ya, Hoss?" Adam hadn't taken his eyes from the house.
"Soon as I see who it is," Hoss said, leading both horses to the hitching rail.
Adam reached to open the front door when it opened from the other side. It was Flora who stopped, her mouth open in surprise. Ben stood behind her.
"Why, Flora," Adam said breaking into a smile. "What a nice surprise to see you." But it was more than that; it thrilled him to see her lovely face again, her rosy mouth, deep-blue eyes and her honey-blonde hair piled beneath a bonnet tied under her chin.
"Miss Flora," Hoss said, standing behind Adam. "Good to see you here. And ain't you lookin' pretty."
"Oh…thank you, Hoss. Adam." She nodded slightly to him while a slight blush reddened her cheeks.
Ben cleared his throat. "Glad you two finally got home. Unfortunately, you're just in time to tell Flora goodbye." Ben put a hand on the small of her back and they stepped out onto the porch.
"Wait a minute," Adam said. "Were you waiting for me, Flora?"
"Well, yes. I wanted to thank you for the flowers. But really, I couldn't wait any longer; I need to get back to town. So, thank you for the beautiful carnations, Adam. Mrs. Wilson put them in my room and when I returned, she announced that Adam Cartwright had brought me flowers and asked if you were now courting me?" Flora couldn't help but smile; she had been wondering the same thing when she saw the bouquet in her room.
"Hmmm…" Hoss said. "Flowers, huh? Makes me wonder too. How 'bout you, Pa? Make you wonder if ol' Adam here is courtin' Flora and not telling us?"
For once, Adam appeared flustered. "Well…if I am, it's none of your business." He turned back to Flora. "Can't you stay for dinner?"
"I tried to get her to stay," Ben said. "Told her Hop Sing was making two roast chickens; one for Hoss and the other for us. But I couldn't convince her."
"Really, I appreciate the invitation, but I can't. It'll be dark in another hour or so and Mrs. Wilson will definitely notice if I'm not back."
"Why is what she thinks important?" Adam asked.
"Because she can boot me out. Besides, on weeknights, the door is locked at 8:00. After that, you have to ring the bell…Mrs. Wilson is very careful of her reputation. Besides, I appreciate that it's a clean and respectable place. If there were comings and goings at all hours, well…" Flora looked at the men's faces. "I know it sounds silly but it's a relief not to have to be concerned about my safety and also have to do the chores of housekeeping and such."
"Not at all, my dear," Ben said. "I understand completely."
Flora sighed deeply and smiled at Ben's kind face. "Thank you. And for the offer of dinner as well."
"Let me drive you back to town," Adam said, shouldering his father aside and placing a forceful hand on Flora's back. Adam noted how small she was.
"Oh…but your dinner." Flora stated and looked back at Ben who stood with arms akimbo. Hoss just grinned.
"I'll eat in town," Adam said. "And since you're in a hurry, shall we go now?"
"Really, I don't want to put you out," Flora protested. "I made a wrong turn coming out here but I'm sure I can make back it alone."
"You're not putting me out; there's nothing I'd rather do." Adam smiled, noticing the scent or rosewater that emanated from Flora. While Hoss and Ben watched, Adam led Flora to the buggy and handed her up. He tied his horse to the back of the buggy and then took the driver's seat, turning the buggy around. Flora waved goodbye.
They rode in comfortable silence for a few moments. Flora spoke first. "I asked your father about that haversack on the porch. It looked military. He said it was yours, that you dropped it there when you came home and haven't yet touched it and it's almost been a week now."
"I'm waiting for any possible lice to die before I go handling what's inside." Adam looked straight ahead.
"Oh, Adam! Really? Lice?"
Adam laughed and looked at Flora's face. "Well, they hitched a ride with me and on me, wanting to get as far away from battlefields as I did."
"Oh, you're teasing me now." They drove along in silence for a bit, both considering what to say. "Adam, you never asked me about Royal, why I married him and such—not that the two of you were ever good friends. But you and I were."
"I always assumed you married him because you loved him."
"Yes, I did, well as much as any 17-year-old can. But Royal was honest and a hard-worker and he loved me. But after you came home from college, you barely acknowledged me and now that you're back from the war, you give me flowers. Why?"
"I thought you liked the flowers. Should I have brought you roses instead of carnations?" Adam asked.
"It's not that, Adam. I remember the flowers you gave me when we were kids. I'd ride out to the Ponderosa with my father and you'd hand me a bunch of wildflowers. Daisies and jonquils, whatever was blooming. And when we were older, you sat beside me at church, took me to church square dances, kissed me behind the schoolhouse once, and then it seemed that suddenly, you were gone, left for back east."
"Well, that's where the college was."
"Don't be facetious, Adam. I'm being serious. You never even said goodbye. I was 14 when you left and the only girl still in school except for Darla Whitmer. You remember her, don't you?"
"Oh, yeah. Darla Whitmer…I haven't thought about her in a long time." A smile played about his lips.
"Oh, don't get that look on your face."
Adam laughed. "Well, she was pretty."
"She left school and married Tom Brennan. They have a little homestead to the south and every so often, she and Tom and their brood of five come into town. Darla looks nothing like she used to, just grim."
Adam turned to look at Flora. "You don't look like you used to."
Flora's lips parted in surprise and then she said, "No, I don't. Every time I see my refection in a storefront window or my own mirror, I see another wrinkle. I wonder where that young girl went."
"That young girl turned into a beautiful woman."
Flora shook her head and smiled sadly. "I guess you have to say that. But so much has happened these past few years to change everyone." She looked off in the distance at the darkness descending on the trees, making them appear mysterious and threatening. "Sometimes, when it's quiet and I'm feeling overwhelmed, I think of Royal and his last minutes of life. I wonder if he thought of me..." Adam stopped the buggy. Flora looked at him and then put her hand to her mouth. "Oh, I'm sorry, Adam. I shouldn't have reminded you of such things."
"You didn't have to, Flora. It's not that I'd ever forget but I want those memories to only wriggle into my head at night when I can't sleep—not during the day, having them jump out from every corner like childhood bugaboos showing their hideous fangs." Flora's eyes shone with unshed tears. "And Flora, had you been home when I brought the flowers, I was going to ask you to the dance, the Ladies Literary Guild dance or as Hoss called it, the Ladies Book Association dance."
Flora laughed. "Dear Hoss! And, Adam, if the invitation is still extended, I'd love to go."
"Extended and now accepted." He leaned toward her and kissed Flora. They stared into each other's eyes and Adam reached out and held the back of her neck, kissing her with more feeling than he knew he had.
"Oh," Flora said with a little intake of breath. "Well…that's not how you kissed me behind the schoolhouse."
Adam laughed, snapping the long reins and the buggy moved again. "I've had a little more experience since then. But, Flora, if I attend church this Sunday, will you wear your hat with the pink roses?"
"I'll wear it just for you, Adam," Flora said and slipped her arm through his. Her heart suddenly felt light, as if the many burdens she had borne had dropped away and she realized she was happy again. And she had Adam to thank for it.