Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, however I do own black skinny jeans and Ed Hardy shoes. Beat that, Stephanie!

A/N: Sorry for the wait. Enjoy!

Chapter 3: The Sweetest Thing

Ouch. What the hell was jabbing my neck the entire night? I felt like a million needles were positioned there while I slept. I lifted my aching head off the cold, concrete and immediately got lost in the emerald orbs staring down upon me. Oh, so all the jail-birds are up.

"G'morning fellow criminals." I yawned.

"Sup, gorgeous?" Alice grinned deviously. What the fuck... "Seemed like you had a good sleep."

"Err, yeah Al, I did. What time was I knocked out?" I asked. I felt really stiff so I must've slept at least twelve hours...in prison. Who would've guessed?

A giggle threatened to escape her lips. "I don't know what time you fell asleep, but I know where you fell asleep..." She grinned manically now. I looked at Edward and Jasper too. Jasper was smirking and Edward was blushing slightly. What the hell? Why was he blushing? Oh God...

"Where did I fall asleep?" I questioned wearily.

She giggled. "Why don't you ask Edward?" Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.

"Edward?" I prodded nervously, blood staining my cheeks red.

"Err, it was n-nothing really, Bella." Edward looked down. "You just, uh, fell asleep on...my leg."

"Leg." Alice scoffed as Jasper laughed uncontrollably.

"What!?" I demanded. "I remember I slept of the concrete! I remember! It was cold and hard!"

"It was hard alright!" Jasper and Alice chuckled, causing Edward to shoot a fierce scowl in their direction.

I was officially pissed off with all the codes and unanswered questions. My mind was burning with curiosity.

"How do I say this politely?" Jasper pondered to himself. "Err, lets just say, you fell asleep on Edward's...err...his-"

"Listen, douchebag, you fell asleep on Eddie's cock and it happened to enjoy the gesture a lot." Alice finished. Holy. Fucking. Shit. Blood flooded to my face. Ugh! Fuck! Now I wished that I could have been sleeping on the needles.

I couldn't even look up to see Edward's expression. Jasper and Alice were just laughing hysterically, completely oblivious to the bubble of awkwardness in the air.

As if it wasn't awkward enough, Alice had to continue. "But that wasn't the worst part. Did you forget that you talk in your sleep?"

"Talking?" Jasper laughed. "More like moaning!" Shit! I forgot about that! My face was probably hotter than the Sahara Desert right now. Not even my thoughts were coherent. When I was finally able to speak again, I breathed, "Uh, what did I say?" I regretting the words immediately.

Alice beamed. "Well, I hope that this is a good enough impression of you." She stood up and cleared her throat. "Oh Edward! Oh yeah! Right there! Your eyes are beautiful, Edward. Oh Edward, I bet you'd look even hotter without a shirt on." Alice sat down again, a triumphant grin plastered on her face.

As if this day couldn't get any worse. In fact, I don't think I can.

Extremely terrible events that have happened in the past 24 hours:

1. Crashed into a jewelery store
2. Got locked up in a concrete and metal jail cell
3. Woke up with needles sticking out of my neck
4. Fall asleep on some hot stranger's dick
5. Have Alice explain out loud and in detail, my fantasies about Edward
6. Have Alice and Jasper gain pleasure from my pain
7. I'm still in jail
8. More to come...

"Fuck you, Alice!" I screamed, standing up.

"Bring it, bitch!" Alice clenched her hands into fists, mockingly. Then, quite randomly, we broke out into laughter.

I looked to one side of me and saw Edward staring intently at me. I bit my lip, trying not to blush. "Sorry, Edward, I mean, you know, for f-falling asleep with - on y-you." I stuttered. I didn't mention the sleep-talking part. Damn, I was such an idiot for that.

"Don't worry 'bout it, Bella. And about the sleep-talking...Alice was just joking around. I mean, you didn't...y'know...sleep-talk." He replied. I immediately relaxed. I am gonna fucking kill that girl!

"So, friends?" I held my hand out to him. I was surprised when his face fell the slightest bit. However he corresponded my gesture by putting forth his hand.

"Friends." We shook and a shock of electricity coursed through my veins. I wonder if he felt it too...

"So when are we finally gonna get out of this fucking cell!?" Alice called, clinging helplessly to the cell bars.

"I don't know, but surely not too long. My mom's gonna come any minute, I bet. Fuck, we're gonna be in big shit once were out." I replied, a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.
Minutes later, an officer appeared with four 'Mcdonald's' bags, each of us receiving one. We all ate and immersed ourselves in conversation.

Finally, I heard footsteps echoing down the hall. It sounded like high heels. I sighed in relief as I saw my mother come into view. Renee. Her brown hair was styled in a nice updo and she was wearing a blue and white summer dress and a pair of Gucci sunglasses on the bridge of her nose that dominated most of her tiny face. She stopped in front of our cell.

She paused momentarily, taking in the scene. "What the hell, Isabella?" She bellowed.

"Hey mom, want a fry?" I asked nervously, picking up my French-fries box and offering it to her.
"Ugh. Why must I always find you in trouble?! Have I failed as a mother, Isabella?" She fretted mostly to herself. "I bailed you out, but there will be hell to pay at home."

"I guess..."

"You bet your ass there will be." An evil glint shimmered in her eyes. Shit. She then averted her gaze to Alice. "And Alice, I talked to your mother today. You should be expecting some hell too, missy." She then noticed the boys for the first time, gawking at them.

Then, the officer slumped to the cell, grabbed a large key off the hook and unlocked the cell. I waved meekly to Alice and the boys I had just met and walked out of the cell. "Well bye, I'll see you tomorrow." And with that, my mother and I walked out of the station.

We settled ourselves in the car and she spoke clearly and precisely. "Listen, you little whore, I don't give a fuck if you get in trouble but when it costs me fucking five thousand dollars, than you're fucking dead! You're such a bitch, Bella! I don't even know why I named you Bella. Bella means beautiful and you're just so fucking ugly!"

"Mom, I'm so sorry."

"Whatever, you whore, 'cause you're getting a job and paying me back. Listen, I have a...friend...over, so go to your room so we can have some privacy...

Oh yeah, I forgot. My mom's daily fuck must still be over...

"Yeah, mom, whatever you want." And I slumped down in my seat.

Well, that's my mom for you! Isn't she just the sweetest thing?

I hope it was okay...Alright, for the next chapter, I want at least a total of 80 reviews! Thanks! REVIEW! :)