Thanks for the reviews. Here's the next bit. On track for getting the rest of this act posted by the end of the week *fingers crossed*
"She'll be fine, Buffy," Giles promised as they exited the car together a couple of days later.
"I know she'll be fine," Buffy replied grumpily. "Dawn's always fine. Doesn't matter what you throw at her, give her a day or two and she's right back to Little Miss Bouncy Full-of-Beans."
Giles looked at her curiously as they walked to the back door.
"Too harsh?" she asked.
He smiled gently. "Not harsh, no, just a little… enthusiastic perhaps?"
She smiled back. "You know I love my sister, right?"
He nodded. She stopped yards from the back door and, sensing her need to talk, he followed suit.
"Let's just say sometimes I wish she was the Slayer and I was the little kid, that's all. Then maybe I wouldn't always feel like I'm bashing my head against a brick wall trying to get through to her and I'd be the one on a plane right now going to see my Dad."
Giles sighed. "This is about her visit to your Father? You encouraged her, and rightly so. Are you regretting that now?"
"No."
"You know she wouldn't have gone without your consent."
"I know. That's what the encouraging was about." Buffy sighed.
"You miss him greatly, don't you?"
The question sort of surprised her. She and Giles had been close for years, some closer than others true, but he probably knew her better than almost anyone, but they had still never had a conversation about this.
"Honestly, yeah, but not like a lot. I've been used to him being gone for a while now. It's just… these past few weeks it's been all family family family around here. The new slayers didn't stop talking about their trips home for a week before they left, and then Naomi was saying about how much she can't wait to see her folks. Andrew's taking Craig home to meet his parents. Even Reece gushed about his Mom for a full three minutes the other day!" Buffy shook her head ruefully. "I guess it's just a very family orientated time – start of the holiday season and all that – and with our family so divided… its making me nostalgic for my Mom and Dad's little Thanksgiving fight nights."
She accepted Giles' comforting arm around her shoulders for a moment or two, but then gently stepped away and gave him a brighter smile.
"It's okay though. I think with the way these years going, we'll soon have our own fight night tradition…and with really good food."
"I'm sure it will be wonderful." Smiling, he followed her into the house.
Willow and Faith were in the kitchen together. They still got along fine. Or at least as fine as they had before. Willow was sat at the table and Faith was perched on the edge next to her with a compact, applying lipstick.
"B." Faith greeted without looking over.
Willow chose a more enthusiastic route. "Hi Giles!"
Buffy and Giles looked at each other and shared an almost-smirk.
"Hello, Willow." He nodded to her. "It's nice to be greeted so cheerfully, but I don't believe I entered the kitchen alone."
"You didn't?" Willow asked innocently.
Buffy rolled her eyes.
Giles turned to her with a sympathetic smile. "I tried."
"You did." She nodded.
"Faith. You look very nice."
She smiled at him, surprised. "Thanks. Going to Barnies. Need a break from all this wholesome living, ya know? Wanna join me for a little debauchery?"
A little colour came to his cheeks as he declined politely and left the room.
"His loss." Faith grinned as she capped the lipstick. She turned her face this way and that, checking herself out in the tiny mirror. "What about you, Red? Changed your mind? Fancy a night on the town?"
"I already told you. I have to get this done for Oz," Willow said without looking up. "Have fun though."
Buffy stood there, still by the back door, waiting for her impromptu invite. It didn't come.
Faith stood to fetch her coat from the kitchen closet. It was cold now at night. It was cold here during the day too, but not like it was once it was dark. It was a bitter cold Buffy had never had the misfortune to experience yet and she couldn't help but wonder what she'd done wrong in her years of fighting evil to have to experience it now.
When Faith was standing just a few feet from her again as she put her coat on, Buffy fidgeted awkwardly.
"I…I could come with you," she said after a while. "You know, if you wanted."
Faith froze as she fastened her buttons. "I didn't think you'd want to."
"Why not? I like Barnies. I've been there more than you."
"I just… well…" Faith trailed off for a second or two. "I've been working my ass off all day, B, I don't think I have the energy for a date, ya know?"
Buffy now felt as flustered as Faith sounded. "I didn't mean a date. I'm not look for a date or anything. I just thought..."
They stared at each other, both looking as uncomfortable as it was possible to be.
"I guess you can come if you want."
"But you'd prefer it if I didn't," Buffy said quietly.
There was a long pause where they held each others eyes.
Faith broke it by shaking her head. "No, that's not what I'd prefer, but…"
The but sealed it for Buffy. She wasn't laying herself on the line for too long at any one time.
"Never mind. Forget it. Have fun." She forced a smile out.
Faith sighed, her shoulders slumping. "Look, B, you can come if you really want to."
"Great, another pity invitation. I've already had one more of those than I can handle this week." Now Faith looked doubly pained. "I'm joking," she lied. "I have stuff to do anyway. You can go. No fall out, I promise."
Faith looked sceptical for a moment, but then finished buttoning her coat. Job done, she gave Willow – who was watching the whole exchange with undisguised interest – a little goodbye wave and then walked right up to – and then into – Buffy.
Before she could ask what Faith thought she was doing it was made clear. Faith's lips literally hit hers and strong arms went around her waist pulling her closer. Despite the slightly painful beginning Buffy kissed her back eagerly; surprised but too pleased to miss a beat.
Faith pulled away far too soon and was walking to the door before Buffy had even gotten her breath back.
"See you tomorrow, babe," she called back before disappearing out the door.
"Yeah," Buffy breathed, smiling stupidly at the door until Willow cleared her throat.
She looked over still with a goofy smile.
"Wish my girlfriend was mad at me that way," Willow muttered before going back to her books.
Buffy chuckled softly and went to sit opposite at her. When Willow didn't immediately get up and disappear she counted it a victory.
"Believe me; I don't really know how Faith is mad at me most of the time. It seems to change day by day. One minute its frosty silence the next its aggressive kisses."
Willow didn't look up. "Yeah, I'm sure they suck."
Buffy rubbed at her front teeth; they still felt a little jarred from Faith's initial lunge.
"My dentist is probably going to think so. "
"Did Dawn get off okay?"
Buffy sighed. "Yeah."
"Dad thing bothering you, huh?"
"A little. What about you? No plans to see your folks over Thanksgiving?"
"They're in Europe."
"Oh right, you said. Until February."
Willow nodded.
"I'm surprised Kennedy didn't decide to go home."
As she said it, Buffy wished she hadn't chosen any topic involving the other slayer. It was a wonder Willow was talking to her even kinda amiably, why did she have to go and screw it up so fast?
To her surprise, Willow just shrugged. "We always planned to spend Thanksgiving here. We're… She's going to her parents for Christmas."
Buffy physically felt the pain in Willow's words and for a second couldn't respond. Even when she could, she didn't know how to.
"Well, you just called her your girlfriend a minute ago," she began cautiously. "Do you think there's a chance you'll make it up, maybe even in time to still go with her?"
Willow spared her a glance. "You tell me. You're the one she confides in these days."
Buffy ignored the sarcasm. "But is that what you want."
Willow shrugged again.
"Do you want her to still be your girlfriend?" Buffy pushed.
"What I want is to not talk to you about this anymore," Willow half-shouted as she looked up with a furious glare. "Can't you just respect that?"
Buffy held her hands up in surrender. "Consider it respected." She studied her thumbnails for beat before looking up again and saying in a rush: "I just thought if you could admit that it might be what you actually still want it might be easier for you to get it back… or something."
The glare she received this time was even angrier, but Willow didn't bother saying anything. Buffy hoped it was because her best friend was actually considering her words, but she wasn't about to push her luck any more by checking.
She looked down at the open books in front of Willow. One had Oz's tiny scribbly rocket scientist's-handwriting and the other was Willow's much looser and curvier script.
"What'cha doing?"
"It's Oz's Werewolf Handbook. He thought we should have a copy."
"There's a Werewolf Handbook?" Buffy asked with a surprised little laugh. "How come I didn't know about it before?"
"Partly because you wouldn't have read it if you had…"
"Hey, I might have read it. I like Werewolves, not in the way you like them, sure, but they're more interesting than, say, Zombies."
"Really? Did you ever get around to reading the Slayer Handbook?"
"Well, no, but I am a Slayer. If I want to know how a part of me works, I can learn by doing, you know? I can't learn by doing Werewolf stuff. Well, I suppose I could try. I could sit up on the roof tonight and howl at the moon for a few hours. Get some Wolfy insights that way."
"It's not a full moon," Willow pointed out, but she cracked her frowny-face with a very small, obviously unwelcome but still-there, smile.
"No matter. It could be like my practise moon." Buffy smiled back. "You said partly. What's the other part?"
"There was only one copy in the world before now and Oz had it."
"Oh, wow, that was lucky then. How did he come to get it?"
Willow smiled properly now and her voice took a note of pride. "He wrote it."
Buffy nodded. "Impressive."
"Well, it started out as just a diary or… or a journal of the places he was going and the people he met up with and the advice they gave him. Just so he had a record of what he had already tried and what worked and stuff. By the time he'd settled in Cleveland he'd filled up a whole book." She tapped it with her finger tips. "He showed it to Giles and Giles convinced him in his Watcherly wisdom that it was too valuable to not have a copy of so he agreed to let us make another."
"Makes sense, but wouldn't it be easier to just scan it into the computer?"
"Yes. Much. And I suggested that, but they ganged up on me and said it had to be done the old fashioned way." Willow let go of her pen for a moment and stretched her fingers out as if just talking about it was enough to make them ache with the strain. "I think Giles would have been even happier if I was sitting here with a quill instead of something so modern as a fountain pen."
"Well, it's a good idea and you do have nice handwriting," Buffy complimented.
Willow nodded her thanks and went back to her copying.
The kitchen fell quiet apart from the scratch of nib on paper. Buffy lowered her chin to her crossed arms and followed the path of the wet black ink across the white page. It was actually peaceful. Something that was too rare in this house generally, but more than that, peace wasn't something she and Willow shared at all recently.
She tilted her head a little and ran the fingers of one hand over the pocked, polished surface of the table in a lazy movement and stupidly let the serene moment lull her falsely.
"What are we going to do about Xander?"
Willow looked up at his name but just as quickly looked down again.
"What do you mean we? He's not mad at you."
"Well, no, but surely if you can forgive me?" She smiled hopefully. "He'll forgive you and then…"
"He's not mad at me because I'm mad at you."
"No, I know, but…"
"And I haven't forgiven you."
"I…I know that too, but…"
"I don't have to forgive you," Willow ranted.
Buffy slumped in her chair. "I guess not, but it would be nice."
"No, I mean, there's nothing to forgive. You were just being a friend. To Kennedy. I get that."
"Oh," Buffy said surprised. "Good. We're okay now then?"
"No!" Willow's shout made Buffy sit back in her chair, eyebrows up. "You don't get it. You never get it."
"Then explain it!"
"I shouldn't have too. We've been friends for eight years, Buffy. Best friends supposedly! So why do you never treat me like it? I've always just been good old, predicable Willow. Why think of me, huh? You know I'm always gonna be there kissing your ass regardless."
"Willow!" Buffy felt more than a little shocked by the outburst. "There's no ass-kissing between us…"
"Nope," Willow muttered. "That's all one-sided."
"It is not because there isn't any! We're just us. And I am your best friend whether you think so or not. Hell, I was busy trying to be your best friend while you were trying to kill me and everyone else you love."
Willow waved a dismissive hand. "Yeah, yeah. Been there, done that… before you did too."
Buffy had to give her that one. "What do you mean I don't treat you like it? We've done practically everything together since we've been friends. Until you stopped talking to me that is."
"No, I've done everything with you! You've always dropped me when something better came along."
"What? That's ridiculous."
"You chose Faith over me!"
Buffy, taken aback, had to take a second to respond to that. "I, uh, didn't even know you liked me like that."
"Oh, get over yourself! I meant back in high school!"
"Me get over myself? You're the one making me sound insurmountable," she shot back, relieved but a little embarrassed that she had gotten the wrong end of the stick.
"And I never chose Faith over you!"
"You did! We were friends and then she came along and was all cool and you were probably already having lusty feelings you were too scared to admit and you hung out with her all the time and hardly had any time for me!"
Buffy shook her head. "That's not true."
"It is. I should know, I was there."
"And so was I!"
"A-and when Tara and I broke up I know you were still hanging out with her behind my back."
"We met up a few times, sure, but it wasn't what I'd call hanging out and it wasn't behind your back."
"Well, you never told me about it."
"I…"
"You told her about Spike!"
"I…" Buffy began again.
She was feeling very off-balance with this conversation as it was. Throw Spike into it and she might as well be spinning around on her head.
"It was a difficult situation," she managed at last.
"Yeah, that you couldn't come to me with."
"It wasn't like that."
"It must have been," Willow countered. "Or I would have found out about it from you and not Tara. Except now I guess if I want to know anything about my supposed best friend I have to go to Kennedy instead. Seeing as she's your new flavour of the month."
"Flavour of the…?" Buffy repeated in angry disbelief. "Do you have any idea how idiotic you sound right now?"
"Yes!" Willow shouted, stopping Buffy from going on. "But that doesn't change the fact that I'm also right. So, no, Buffy, you don't need my forgiveness. The only thing you did wrong was be a nice person. But you should have been my nice person, not Kennedy's, don't you understand? Just once it would have been nice to not have to fight for your attention… for your friendship… when I needed it the most. So you know what, if you need it so bad, yeah, I forgive you, we're still best friends if that makes you feel better, but I'm still mad as hell at you too so just back the hell off, Okay!"
Buffy flinched when Willow started yelling, but sat her ground waiting for it to stop. When Willow was just staring at the table top and breathing heavy, she risked a tiny grin.
"Actually, yes, that does make me feel better. Thank you."
The glare Willow fired at her made Buffy flinch again.
"Just leave me alone."
"No."
"Please?" Willow asked as she picked up her pen again.
"No because if I leave you alone when you obviously need me then I'm just playing into your completely irrational hysterical paranoia," Buffy explained, shifting in her seat a little as if she was settling in the long-haul.
"That's fine. Play into it all you want. Anything as long as you're not sitting there anymore." Willow muttered as she resumed her copying.
"Sorry. Not going anywhere," Buffy sing-songed with as much enthusiasm as possible.
She would bounce a beach ball on her nose like a seal if she thought it would melt the ice that had suddenly formed over them again – even thicker than before. Unfortunately she didn't have a beach ball and Willow still wasn't looking up.
"I don't want to talk about this anymore tonight," Willow said quietly as she rubbed at her nose with her pen-less palm and blinked her eyes a few times. "I'm not feeling great as it is and you're making it worse."
"Okay, so lets talk about what I originally wanted to talk about before you started getting all hissy-fitty on me," Buffy said slowly. "What do you think we should do about Xander? We both know he's not right at the moment, Will, and he's sinking further all the time. If we don't do something to pull him out of this black mood soon…"
Willow looked up in exasperation and cut her off. "I tried helping him and look how well I did. He doesn't want my help and forcing it on him only made the situation worse."
"So what does that mean?"
"It means if he wants my help, great, I'm here, but until he asks I'm backing off and leaving him be."
"Do you think I should do the same?" Buffy asked.
She didn't like the idea of the sitting back and doing nothing approach, but she liked it better than having Xander mad at her like he was Willow.
"That'd be swell," Willow assured her.
She sighed. "I meant with Xander."
"Oh. Then I don't care."
"Of course you do."
"Look, Buffy, either you go or I go, and I was here first," Willow insisted, rubbing her nose again irritably.
"I already told ya, Will. I'm not going…"
Willow's forceful sneeze cut her off.
"…Anywhere," she finished quietly as she looked around the empty kitchen in surprise. "Hey! Using Magic is cheating!"
"Another?"
Faith continued to stare into her empty glass as she answered. "You tryin' to get me drunk, Al?"
"I didn't think you could get drunk."
"I can. Just takes more than beer."
"Would you like something stronger then?" She finally took the glass away from her face and hiked an eyebrow at him. "I'm honestly not trying to get you drunk," he added.
She chuckled and pushed some more money across the bar. "Guess I'll just take another of these then."
Alex fetched a fresh glass from above the bar. "You've been in a lot the last couple of weeks."
"There a law against it? You gonna arrest me for taking up bar space?" She made a show of looking around the mostly empty pub. "Me sitting here taking a chunk outta your profits?"
Despite her sarcasm she liked that it was nearly always quiet in Barnies. Normally she preferred joints where she could lose herself in the crowd and the music and just let loose. She wasn't feeling so much like that these days though. A cold beer and a chance to let her thoughts take over for a while were more her style.
Which was pathetic, but who cared, right?
"Not at all." Alex smiled and then scratched a little at his stubbly chin. "Just lately you are my profits."
She smiled back as she picked up the beer he'd pushed across the bar. She tilted it slightly towards him in a silent toast before taking a sip and then lowered it back to the bar so it was easier to stare into.
So this was her big fresh start. She'd done her time fair and square so she could be with the woman she thought she loved with no hassles and here she was sitting in a bar by herself and still sleeping in a bed alone every night.
Something had sure gone wrong with her grand plan somewhere along the line.
She should have just let Buffy come with her tonight. But, and this was something she didn't even like admitting to herself, she was scared. She didn't want to do the sit down and talk thing with her. At first it had been because she was pissed off, but now she was just convinced she'd screw it all up as soon as she opened her mouth.
Or Buffy would.
Which was pretty ridiculous, because it couldn't get much more screwed than it already was. But right now at least she could be sure Buffy still liked her. What if she didn't after they talked? Easier to keep her at arms length for now until she had her head together better.
Except not easier. At all. Which was why she kept kissing her. But only when Buffy wasn't expecting it, and never when Buffy was actually looking for it, because that might imply… something. Something Faith wasn't ready to imply yet, obviously, even if she didn't really know what it was herself.
"Why am I so screwed up?"
"What makes you think you're screwed up?"
Faith hadn't even realised she'd spoken out loud and looked up tetchily to see Alex holding out her change.
She snatched it out of his hand. "I appreciate you're just embracing your job, but I'm not looking for barstool therapy, thanks."
"Okay," he said, but didn't leave.
Faith took an angry swig of her beer and set it down again. Alex stayed silent but she couldn't think properly with him just standing there.
"Fine." She threw her hands up a little like he'd been badgering her to speak. "I have this awesome girl waiting for me at home but she doesn't want me. There, ya happy now?"
He frowned a little. "Buffy?"
She nodded without looking at him.
"Why would she be waiting for you if she didn't want you?"
"I like your logic, big guy, but its bullshit. No offence."
Alex shrugged. "Trust me, she wants you."
"Yeah? And how would you know?"
"Because she told me. Well, not me exactly, just the guy who served her too many drinks one night, but that guy happened to be me and that's how I know."
"Okay, maybe I am drunk on beer, because you lost me."
"She was drinking those green cocktails she likes." A wistful smiled flashed across his face. "And she couldn't stop talking about you. All night. And the more cocktails she had, the more graphic she got." He went a little pink at the memory.
Faith grinned at the revelation. "Was this recently?"
"Not really. You were still, uh, away."
"You're a cop, Al; the word 'prison' shouldn't scare ya. And things have changed a lot since then," she added with a morose sigh.
"Why?"
"Turns out she liked the fantasy better than the reality of me being around."
"Really?"
"I dunno. Maybe it's me that did."
She finished her drink in a series of gulps and pushed her change across the bar for another.
"Is that really how you feel?" he asked as he poured it.
"I dunno," she said again, feeling even more depressed.
She took out her cigarettes and tapped the bottom so hard one flew up and straight between her waiting lips.
"You mind?" she asked around it as she fished for her lighter in her jeans.
He wasn't a fan of the second hand smoke himself, but the old boys around the back smoked their pipes often enough that he was used to it. So he shook his head as he set her drink down in front of her.
"You got an ashtray or should I just flick it on the floor?"
"Plenty on the tables," he told her pointedly.
"And here was me thinking you were enjoying prying into my life."
As she started to get down from her stool she thought he was going to let her go – which didn't bring as much relief as she expected – but at the last minute before she picked up her drink, he waved his hand at her.
"Stay there. I'll get one."
She smiled once he couldn't see her and sat back down again. When he was back behind the bar he put a green plastic ashtray in front of her.
"So do you own this place?" she asked. "'Cause I thought you were supposed to be the sheriff around here."
"I'm the deputy sheriff," he said gruffly. "And I thought we were talking about you."
She gave a one-shoulder shrug. "Okay, sure, if you really want to know. I don't own this place."
He looked confused for a second before he got it and then he laughed softly, shaking his head. "Really?"
"No, but if I was gonna own a bar this wouldn't be such a suck one to own, I guess. It's big." She turned on her stool to look around. "Could be a hell of a lot busier though."
"It'll be heaving at Christmas," he vouched. "Would be busier now if you'd brought Buffy with you."
She turned back around on her stool, sighing. "You're not subtle, man."
He nodded. "I'm not good at subtle."
She ground her cigarette out in the ashtray. "Me neither."
"In what way?"
"Is it so wrong to want to have sex with my girlfriend?"
"Uh? I…I…" He went bright red and stammered a bit without actually saying anything.
"Never mind, forget I said anything," she huffed and once again finished her beer quickly.
"I…I…" He said some more, and then shook his head quickly. "Do you, uh, want…?"
"Why not?" She pushed her empty glass towards him. "Not like I'm getting any tonight anyway, right?"
He picked up the glass and hurried to a pump at the other end of the bar to refill it.
Faith chuckled tiredly. She'd finally managed to scare him away. Except now she had she felt even lonelier than before. She wasn't used to loneliness. At least, she wasn't used to letting it get a hold on her. Trust her to start succumbing the second she actually had people around who gave a shit.
The door opened behind her before Alex came back, but she didn't take any notice. People had been trickling in and then out again all night.
So when someone right next to her said: "Why do you have to be here?" She looked up in surprise.
Kennedy was standing there, glaring at her.
"Piss off," Faith answered disdainfully and faced the front again.
"Don't start with me!" Kennedy growled.
"Uh, you started. I was just sitting here."
"Yeah, well, do you have to be?"
"Piss Off," Faith said again, pronouncing each word strongly this time.
Out of the corner of her eye she saw Kennedy shake her head and then Alex was back with her drink.
"Thanks." She accepted it with a smile.
"Hi, Kennedy."
"Hey, Alex. Could I get…?"
Before she could finish, Faith interrupted. "You forgot my chaser."
Alex looked surprised. "I did?"
"Yeah. Double Jack." She put some more money on the bar.
Obviously bemused, Alex grabbed a small glass from the back of the bar and held it to the optics. Kennedy stared straight ahead, jaw clenched, and Faith hid her smile behind an expression of boredom.
Alex gave her the whiskey and took the money. Once it was in the cash register he turned back to Kennedy again.
"What can I…?"
Faith cut him off again. "What about my peanuts?"
Alex looked more than bemused this time. "What peanuts?"
Faith waved some more money at him. "Call yourself a barman? I order three things and you can't remember them."
He went to take the money, but she pulled it away.
"Yeah right? I wanna see the nuts first."
Sighing heavily he went to fetch them. Kennedy's jaw was still clenched but now she was glaring straight at her. Faith gave her a bright smile before turning away again. When Alex came back she exchanged the money for the bag of nuts. After he'd put it in the till he turned to Kennedy again.
"So?"
"I'll have a…"
"Jeez, man, are you new at this?" Faith broke in again. "Where are my…?"
Kennedy couldn't take it anymore. "You said you ordered three things. Three! You have three fricken things in front of you so what the hell could you be missing now?"
Faith laughed. "Fair enough. I had no idea what else I was gonna ask for anyway." She waved a hand at Kennedy. "You can go."
"Thank you," Kennedy said with exaggerated patience. "I'll have a beer please?"
"You're underage!" Faith said with a gleeful smirk.
Kennedy looked like a deer caught in the headlights for a split second but she didn't splutter when she finally said, "No, I'm not!"
Alex looked unsure; after all, he'd served her before.
"She's lying!" Kennedy insisted while Faith just grinned smugly.
"I'm sorry, Kennedy, I don't want to doubt you or anything, but I'm going to need some ID now, just to be on the safe side."
"You've got to be kidding me?"
"I'm an officer of the law," he said uncomfortably. "I have to look into all allegations whether I want to or not. I'm sorry; I probably should have asked the first time you came in."
"Probably?" Faith scoffed.
Kennedy dug irritably into her back pocket and pulled out her wallet. Flipping it open she pulled out her ID card and thrust it towards Alex. He gave it some scrutiny and then, glaring at Faith, handed it back.
"Sorry," he muttered to Kennedy and then walked to the other end of the bar to pour a beer.
"You're kidding," Faith breathed as she watched him. Turning back to Kennedy she snatched the card out of her hand before she could put it away. "Let me see that!"
It was a damn good job. She knew for a fact that Kennedy was only nineteen, but according to her ID she was nearly twenty-two and you couldn't fault the workmanship. It was miles better quality than any of the many cards she had before going to jail.
"Damn," she muttered as she handed it back, impressed despite herself.
It was Kennedy's turn to grin smugly as she put the card back in her wallet.
"Red do that for you?" Faith whispered, doubtful Willow would be in the business of fake ID's.
Kennedy shook her head, but Alex came back with her beer before she could expand.
"I'm gonna clear some tables," he said before walking off again. Obviously too pissed at Faith right now to stay and chat.
Faith rolled her eyes and downed her double whiskey. She shook her head a little as she savoured the burn.
"Dunno how you can drink that stuff," Kennedy muttered, sipping from her beer.
"Yeah, well it helps to be legal," Faith countered. "Anyway, plenty of available space in here. Don't feel ya gotta sit next to me."
Kennedy took the next bar stool anyway. "You know, if you weren't such a bitch all the time, maybe Buffy would be here and you wouldn't have to get drunk alone."
Faith felt her anger flare but she didn't give Kennedy the satisfaction of seeing it. "I'm not getting drunk and Buffy wanted to be here."
"So why isn't she?"
Faith still didn't have a good answer for that. "Aren't you supposed to be patrolling? Or are you still shirking your responsibilities because of your broken heart?"
"No!" Kennedy snapped. "I've done it already."
"Yeah, well as a wise blonde once said to me, sometimes a Vamp'll hit a street even after you've checked it, so maybe you should go do another round."
"Who said that?"
Faith rolled her eyes.
"Buffy." Kennedy guessed. "Well, I already went around twice without needing to be told and there's nothing out there. I've only staked two Vamps in town since the night of the Rising. Plus Giles told me to stay away from anywhere those Meluthian lizards might be hiding."
"Yeah, me too. He wants to wait until Red has something on their magical shit. You know if she's made any progress?"
"If she has I'd be the last person she told."
"True," Faith said without any sympathy.
She tried to ignore the other Slayer then. With her elbow on the bar and her head in her hand, she looked deep into the amber-hued contents of her glass. She'd done all the talking she was in the mood for tonight. It was her night off. Tomorrow she would be the one out there patrolling and she wouldn't be wasting her time on the dead-empty streets of Boudenver.
She could go into the city. Cleveland was filled up with vampires and other evil nasties just waiting to meet the sharp end of her weapons. Giles didn't expect any of them to head that way because the Hellmouth was around here someplace, but Faith had taken Alison once or twice and it was a way better training ground than this little town.
It would be boring catching the bus on her own though. An hour and half journey through Hick-country, and in the dark. The taxi ride back wouldn't be so bad. Expensive, but she could just stretch out and take a nap if the driver was boring.
It seemed like a lot of effort for a couple of hours of patrol. Maybe she could steal one of the cars for a few hours, or, like borrow one maybe anyway. Didn't B say the truck was part hers? Surely no one would mind so much if she took it into the city for a few hours then, on business so to speak.
She sighed. Probably not, but they might mind if she wrapped it around a tree before reaching the end of the drive. And Debbie D might mind if she got pulled over by one of Alex's buddies with no driver's license.
"So what do you really think about Buffy's Thanksgiving idea?" Kennedy asked, breaking her thoughts.
Not lifting her head, Faith shrugged. "Not a lot to think about is there? She wants to cook a big-ass meal, I got no problem eating it."
"You get this is about more than the food, right?"
"Yeah, yeah, peace, love, harmony, giving thanks, whatever. I'm sure I can fake my way through one day of it."
"No, it's more than that, for Buffy, anyway."
Faith dropped her forearm to the bar and turned her head to Kennedy.
"What do you mean?"
"I'm sure you'll figure…" Kennedy began, lifting her beer to her smirking lips.
Faith caught and squeezed her shoulder making beer splash over Kennedy's hand.
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'll figure it out too, but you already know so how about you save me some time."
Kennedy gave the hand on her shoulder a pointed look. Faith acknowledged it with a smile, but didn't remove her hand. So, wincing a little, Kennedy set down her dripping glass and started talking.
"Buffy's missing… probably everything right now. Her home, her town, her old life. Her parents. You know how bummed she is that her dad invited Dawn for the holidays and not her, right?"
"She said she didn't care," Faith said, remembering the conversation they'd had a week or so ago perfectly.
"Then she lied."
Faith dropped her hand from Kennedy shoulder. "Really? And why would she tell you the truth and not me?"
"Would you like a list?" Ignoring Faith's narrowing eyes, she continued. "My guess? Partly because I spent more than thirty seconds talking to her about it and partly because she doesn't mind burdening me with her problems. Not that they are a burden or anything," she added quickly, "But that's probably how she sees them."
"And how come you don't see them as a burden?" Faith asked, openly suspicious.
"I think the real question should be: How come you do?" Kennedy countered.
"I don't. She can tell me anything she likes."
"Does she know that?" Kennedy pushed. "I'm only asking because you're clearly not big with the personal discussion thing."
"Did she say that?"
Kennedy shrank back a little at the snapped question. "No, I was going by our conversation now, but I guess I hit a nerve."
Faith turned back to face the bar.
"I'm gonna hit something in a minute," she muttered, swirling the last of her beer around the glass. "You can stop looking at me now; this conversation is over."
Kennedy did turn away and nursed her beer in silence. Faith downed the last of hers and thought about getting up and going home. Grabbing Kennedy's wrist, she checked the younger Slayer's watch. It was still too early. She had to wait until Buffy was in bed at least.
If she went home right now she was just drunk enough to give in and kiss Buffy goodnight, but not drunk enough to fall asleep straight after. She couldn't take the thought of lying awake for hours hornier than usual and beating herself up for making a move when she wasn't ready.
Besides, there was no way she was letting Kennedy think she'd succeeded in running her out of Barnies.
Alex was still MIA so she leaned back on her stool and called out, "Hey, Al! A little service?" He didn't come running so she rapped her knuckles hard on the bar. "Could die of thirst around here, ya know?"
"You're not easy to talk to, you know?" Kennedy said quietly once Faith has shut up.
"Yeah, we just established that." Unconcerned, she twisted on her seat, still trying to locate Alex.
"No, I mean for Buffy. You have all that bad history for one thing, but there's also the fact that you don't have a whole lot in common."
Faith sneered. "Oh, but you think you two are the perfect match, is that it?"
For once Kennedy didn't rise to the bait. "I didn't say you weren't a perfect match. I just said you didn't have a lot in common. Think about it, apart from you both being slayers, what is there?"
Faith didn't want to think about it. She already had more than once.
"Your point?" she asked tiredly.
"Maybe you need to find some common ground to talk about."
"And how do we find it?"
"Well, you could try talking to her for starters…" Kennedy began sarcastically, but trailed off as she spotted the flaw in her plan.
Faith huffed a laugh. "What came first: the conversation or the common ground?"
Seeing Alex coming back around the side of the bar, Faith waved her empty glass and pleaded with her eyes.
Taking pity he came back over. "What can I get you this time?"
"Two beers. And one for yourself."
"Thanks," he said gruffly and started pouring three beers one after the other.
Kennedy looked surprised, but nodded her thanks when Faith pushed a full glass in front of her.
Faith drank half of hers in one go.
"You better not stray too far this time," she told Alex. "If she keeps talking to me I'm gonna need you to keep them coming."
Kennedy turned to the big deputy sheriff and asked, "Alex, if you were in love with someone you didn't have much in common with, what would you do to change that?"
"Hey!" Faith snapped at her, but turned to Alex nonetheless, hoping she didn't look too eager for his answer.
Alex thoughtfully rubbed the stubble on either side of his mouth. "Well, the last time I was in love was with this girl called Sharra. She was wonderful. Smart, sophisticated, and every time I saw her I couldn't think of a single thing to say that she might find interesting." He paused, smiling slightly. "But I knew she was in the church choir, so I joined up. I got to see her three evenings a week and I always had a way to start a conversation."
"What? 'Hi, I'm a great big lame-o?'" Faith guessed with a grin.
Alex gave her a surly glare for a second before saying, dead-pan, "Maybe, but I was a great big lame-o who got to date her for a year and a half. Where's your girlfriend again?"
"Whatever, man." Faith shook her head wearily. "You're excused again; I can pour my own beers."
Alex laughed at her. "You live in the same house. You work at the same school. There must be something you can find to talk about."
"I can find stuff to talk about. That's not the problem."
"Then what is?" Alex asked.
Kennedy looked up with eager interest too. When Faith didn't answer, she did.
"She's worried she can't give Buffy what she wants."
"Hey, I can give B what she wants!"
"Emotionally speaking," Kennedy continued like Faith hadn't spoken.
"I… I never said that!" Faith hoped her angry tone covered her initial hesitation.
"You don't need to, it's obvious. Buffy's really messed up right now. With her Dad thing, and with the Willow ignoring her thing, and the Xander being depressed thing, and the whole losing her home thing, and the, you know, you thing. I mean, Buffy's big on family – I get that and I hardly know her – and right now her family is really screwed up."
Kennedy paused to sip from her beer; Faith just sat there staring into hers.
"If you thought you could be there for her, I'm sure you'd be there right now instead of sitting here getting drunk, because otherwise it would mean you just didn't care, right?"
Faith knocked her beer back in three swallows and pushed her glass across the bar. Alex refilled it and pushed it back without a word. She chugged half of it, feeling it finally fog her mind just a little. Setting the glass down carefully she watched as she turned it in wet circles on the bar.
After minutes of silence, she simply muttered, "I care."