AN: Well..Here is is, a day delayed because of my stupid cough.. This chapter didn't turn out as good as I would have liked it do, in fact, I'm pretty sure I hate it.. Here you go.

Healing The Scars

Chapter 6

"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."

Neil Gaiman

Somewhere, in an apartment, lays a man, hoping that darkness, which has caused his broken heart nothing but ache, is coming to finally get him. An empty bottle of whisky is lying near the man's feet and next to it is one single candle; the last little flam is clinging to the matt, trying to survive as it starts to spread.

A blond man, someone would call him a boy, is praying for death to embrace him. To try to undo what has been, by giving back the life he wasn't supposed to have, the love from Noah Mayer he hadn't any right of claiming.

Oh, he waits, as the buzz from the whisky is having its effect, knocking his mind out, and that dying flame, isn't dying anymore. Strong and beautiful, it light up the apartment, as the flames once again grows bigger.

A peaceful and painless death, some would have called it. Until the next day, when they would get to know the whole story, the news paper would come, and they would all read of the young boy who lost his reason to live, because of an accident that wasn't his fault. They would read, and one man, who knew he had made his biggest mistake, would weep.

Somehow, with everything just passing by in a haze, a white fog, Noah had made it back to the house, only to be kicked out. She had yelled a lot when she got the whole story out of him, in only a matter of seconds.

"Are you insane?"She had said, as her hands flew around in anger as she glared at him, and for a moment he had forgotten that the rolls should have been reversed."Have you completely lost your mind? You can't let him walk away now, especially not after what you told me what just happened. He needs you the most" She had said to a confused Noah who had stood there, trying not to break.

"Remember how you felt after the accident!" She had tried her voice softer. "Remember how I was after the accident, and then multiply that ten times. Luke has no reason to live, expect you, and right now, he thinks he's managed to push you out of his life too"And at that, something had managed to click inside of him as she pushed him through the door, but not before adding; "I know you love him" She had give him a glare that said "don't you dare argue with me on this one" which had shut up him, letting she continue, "I won't let you step through this door before you come back, either tomorrow, or today, with him. Don't let the best thing that have ever happened to you, slip

away" and before Noah had anytime to argue back, or even say a word, she had pushing him out on the street, and closed the door.
So here he was know, his chest is burning from of the lack of air as he ran down the street, block after block, long limbs stretching as he ran, ranto save the love of his life. It feels like a lifetime passes before he reached the wooden door that leads into Luke's apartment.

"Luke" He shouted as he knocked. "I know that you're in there and I'm not leaving until you opened the door!" He was greeted with silence. "Come on" He knocked again, louder.

The words from earlier was suddenly whispering to him, and he started pacing back and forth the small corridor, fearing the worst. "LUKE!"

He knew his was getting desperate, but the images of Luke lying on the floor, lifeless, wouldn't stop.

He was just about to knock again, when the familiar smell of smoke filled his nose, and he froze in fear.

No... No, he wouldn't do that... He wouldn't"

Noah shook his head as he stared at the door in disbelief. "It was supposed to be me be, not Scott" Luke's voice whispered to him… "It's my fault!" Without hesitation, Noah made a run against the door, and with a bang; the door fell from its holds.

He could feel his heart race as he walked into the apartment, scanning the room quickly for any sigh of Luke, and he felt his heart skip a beat when he saw him. There, on the floor, passed out, with an empty bottle next to him, laid his Luke. Then, he noticed the fire that was spreading, and his instincts kicked in.

"Oh Luke" He sank to his knees and lifted him up from the floor and headed to the bedroom, who's doors was slightly opened. It didn't take long for him to strip him to his underwear before pulling on a pair of sweatpants and a clean shirt. Noah gazed at him one more time before softly closing the door, and getting comfortable on couch.

He can't stop. Those guttural, primal screams tear at his throat, and he's crying, reaching for something he can't touch and begging someone, anyone to turn on the light.

"Luke. Luke, wake up. Come on, Luke, wake up."

Someone is shaking him; a bedside lamp clicks on, and he can see Noah's face, blue-eyed and worried. His voice gives out, and the screams stop, becoming instead noisy gasps for breath.

He cried so hard as his lungs tries to gasp for air, something he hasn't done since the day he woke up at hospital. He's till half-asleep, nothing makes sense. Noah is standing there, looking like an angel, why was he standing there?

A soft scrap of cloth is brushing his face, his nose, as if he were a child. Noah holding him now, murmuring comforting words into his hair, his arms tight around his so he can't run away. He grips the shirt as if was the last anchor to reality and he cries.

"I...I...couldn't," he gasped broken and afraid, "I wasn't fast enough." He untangles the sheets from around his legs, without ever letting go of Noah, his minds still a fog.

"Don't go," he whispered, tired, and he felt Noah squeezing his hand, a light feather kiss on his forehead.

"Not goin' anywhere." Noah hushed him as he feels Luke snuggle closer to him, holding on tight as if he's afraid to let go.

From the gentle brush, Noah knows Luke is still in there somewhere, veiled now behind a hastily built armor of pain and grief and so much sorrow. Noah wishes he could break through it, reach in like a bee to a tulip, push past the delicate shield of petals and take the sweet pollen inside for his own, but he knows more than anyone that defenses are there for a reason that tearing them down will only repair them thicker. It's not fair, he thinks as watches him falling back to sleep, and it becomes the guilt in his soul, it's not fair that Luke's feeling like this, but he knows, as he gazes down at his sleeping angel, that there is no way that he can stop loving him. No matter what.

The sunlight is casting its morning shadow over the bedroom, announcing the new day. Luke wakes up, feeling someone playing with his hair, and gazes up to meet a pair of blue eyes that somehow are smiling warmly at him. They don't judge.

The few fragments of the previous night come back to him, and for a moment, he snuggles deeper into the cover. "Can we forget that last night never happened?" Luke murmured quietly as he played with Noah's other hand who wasn't in his hair. He can feel the guilt rise within him, stronger with every minute.

"I kind of like last night" Noah tried, but stopped as he felt Luke froze. "We can't take back our actions Luke, and what we do, have consequences, but this time, I'm letting you off the hook this time. Just don't ever try something like that again; you nearly scared the life out of me"

"Sorry"

"Don't" Noah said as he looked down to meet Luke's gaze. "You have nothing to apologize for Luke"

"But"

"What you did was stupid, I admit that" Noah interrupted. "But you're human Luke, it's okay for you to make mistakes, and you have nothing to apologize for. You had a bad day and you did something that could have ended badly, which thankfully did not. That doesn't mean we're not going to talk about this, because we are, just no right now, because I know that would make you run and hide all over again. "

"How can you be like that?" Luke raised his head and glanced at Noah.

"Like what?"

"So… Calm?" He asked.

Noah went quite as for a moment as he continued to play with Luke's hair. "Because I used to be where you are Luke, I used to hate life and wished that the people I saw die instead of me, took my place." He gazed at Luke to see if he was listing; his brown eyes starting questionably back at him. It's true that I don't have any scars to prove it, not any you can see, and I am better now, but I do have scars, and I want to show them to you" He reached out a hand and touched Luke's cheek. "That is, if you want me too."

Luke sees Noah smile as he reached for his phone again. He had been doing that for the last half hour, texting back and forth with someone, while holding a tight hold on Luke.

"Where are we going?" Luke asked as Noah started walking again.

"It seems" Noah looked down at his phone again. "That we are going to the library"

Luke raised an eyebrow. "I'm unsticking a little" Noah said with a smile as he leaded them through the library. He sees Noah gazing, searching for someone and soon breaks out in a smile as he sees her.

"Cassie" He said softly as he took a step forward to a girl who was sitting on near the window, with a heavy book in her lap and an Ipod lying next to her. The first thing Luke notice about her is a scars, stretching across her arm. It's partly hidden behind a white shirt, but it's there… A similar burn mark, almost identical to Luke's, expect hers, isn't as invisible as his. It's thicker, wider, and takes up more space.

"It's hard not to look is it?" Luke snapped his eyes up and is greeted with a pair of green eyes. "Even if you have one yourself, it's hard not to look, and wonder?" Her voice is calm as she met his curios gaze, and her eyes don't hold any anger.

TBC