Disclaimer: I own nothing but I'd love Edward to own me

AN: So many thanks to those of you who alerted this story. This is really new for me so thanks for the encouragement!

To my kick ass beta changedbyedward Love you H&R

Check out her story Ascension. It's a bitchin' alternate BD with awesome romance and epic battles

This chapter has a few lines from the breakup scene in NM

Now on to the story…

BPOV

"Arg I just want it to shut up!" I yelled as I slapped at the stereo trying to stop the offensive music coming out of it before it made my ears bleed or make me cry…again.

It's been one month and three days (not that I'm counting) since he left me. I can't even say his name out loud in my head. How pathetic is that?

Alice had a vision of me ripping out the stereo earlier that week so she came and set the presets either on talk radio or obscure music so I wouldn't hear anything that reminded me of him. So, when "My Immortal" by Evanescence started playing by request on one of the talk shows, my hands starting shaking.

So here I sit on the side of the road trying to maintain what's left of my sanity. Trying not to let the hurt overpower me or I'll never make it to school.

"You promised! In Phoenix, you promised that you would stay—"

"As long as that was best for you," he interrupted to correct me.

No, no, no, this is NOT happening right now. For about a week I would have like a time lapse moment where it was like I was right there with him again. It would flash in front of me like my mind was on rewind but there's no way to stop it. No changing it. No erase button so I can start all over again.

I tried slowing down my breathing like Alice taught me for when I was having one of these episodes. I tried to relax but it was too late. I was already there.

"You…don't…want me?" I could see us, standing there in the woods. I stood there, confusion and anger on my face. He stood there, his eyes different, harder- like the liquid gold had frozen solid.

"No."

"Well that changes things." I saw myself reply. I wish I could jump in there. Stop this from happening. Make him stay and talk to me. But I was a prisoner. All I could do was watch as my heart tore open in anguish once again.

"I would like to ask one favor, though, if that's not too much," he said.

I saw something flash across his face when I heard myself say, "Anything," with conviction. I would love to think it was him regretting what he was doing as he saw me there breaking to pieces in front of him but I remember his eyes becoming soft, the ice melting.

"Don't do anything reckless or stupid," he ordered no longer detached. "Do you understand what I'm saying?"

I'm trying to close my eyes again because this part always pisses me off. There he goes again constantly questioning my intelligence. I wish I would have yelled at him or said something like, "Well if that isn't the pot calling the kettle." Anything to not look so helpless.

I opened my eyes and damn it to hell, I'm still freaking here, only thankfully, I didn't have to see Edward leave this time. I saw myself running to their house tripping and crying for Alice the whole way there.

"ALICE! ALICE! PLEASE BE HERE! God don't tell me you've left me too! He said he stayed to say goodbye, everyone's gone. It's not true! It can't be. I can't…" I saw myself crash into the front door and just crumble onto the floor no longer having the energy or will to hold myself up.

It was only a moment before I saw my light fly out of the woods. Even though it sucks I always like that part. Alice found me. She stayed. She loved me enough to stay behind.

"Bella, open your eyes I know you can hear me already."

I see myself look up at two big amber eyes and breath, "Alice," as I wrapped my arms around her, seeking comfort in her cold embrace.

"He's gone, Alice! He left... He said… no one stayed…" I sobbed, choking on my words and rocking back and forth while she stroked my hair.

"Shhh, Bella, I know. You KNOW I know." She laughed a little trying to make me calm down. "Breathe. In. Out. That's it. I'm here and no I'm not leaving. I was just getting human stuff."

As I'm sitting here wondering how much more I was going to see, a tapping sound snapped me out of it.

I turned my head to the passenger's side of my truck and I see Alice looking highly annoyed and tapping at my window.I opened the cab door and Alice slinked herself next to me.

"You know we're late, like really late, for school right?" Alice stated as I pulled the truck off the side of the road.

"Yeah, I know, I um, had a moment." I turned red, as usual, as Alice waved her hand.

"It's okay. Now we can have a sick day and go shopping to chase the memories away," she said with the hugest smile on her face.

I made, what I hoped could pass for a smile and Alice scooted over to hug me. I sniffed a little into her shoulder.

"I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner. I was stuck in homeroom when I Saw what was happening. I'm sorry I didn't get here before you went back." She hugged me a little tighter and sat back in her seat.

"Okay, so do we need to keep to the state or could we jump around a bit? They opened a new Dolce and Gabbana store on Rodeo Drive and Louis Vuitton is having a fabulous sale." Alice practically sang the praises of the shopping Gods.

"As long as we're here before Charlie gets home. I don't want to give him another reason to freak out." Really, I hated shopping and I would probably regret this as soon as it was Alice who was driving but after all we've been through, how could I deny my best friend?

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