Chapter 3: Riza
"Where is he?" Riza asked herself while waiting for Roy to pick her up for their date. It wasn't much later that she heard a large explosion coming from a nearby Valero. "I better check it out!" Riza then hurried towards the gas station with two, or three, or four guns at the ready. Once she got there she found a severly burned, and dead Roy Mustang. "And I didn't get to say goodbye..."
Riza mourned for the next week or so and became an extreme alcoholic. One day while she was practically incapable of walking, Riza devised a plan. She would be able to bid Roy farewell. Even though she was drunk she was capable of creating a floating seat. By strapping large balloons to a chair she planned on riding her way up to the sky in order to say goodbye. Once she believed that she had gotten high enough she left Roy a final message, "You zuck! How guld you sdand up a lady?!" After giving her message Riza popped the balloons and fell to her death.
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Riza is granted the darwin award for not carying an emergency parachute.