A/N (I recommend reading this): I'm going to MAKE THIS CLEAR. Just like I mention on my bio page about every other fanfiction I done: I DON'T OWN THE PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIAN SERIES or AND THE KANE CHRONICLES OR IT'S CHARACTERS as the rights goes to Rick Riordan. Also I suggest you guys start paying attention to the Author notes and my warnings that I left on EVERY chapter of EVERY story.

Sorry if this chapter is too much like the book.

This is a The Tales of version of the Percy Jackson and Kane Chronicles crossover and takes place after 'The Tales of the Heroes of Olympus part of the series. So if you haven't read them yet read before reading this story as stuff that happened in them will be mentioned:

The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: the Early Adventures
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: The Lightning Thief
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: The Sea of Monsters
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: The Titan's Curse
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: The Magical Labyrinth
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: the Stolen Chariot
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: the Sword of Hades
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: the Bronze Dragon
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: The Last Olympian
The Tales of the Son of Poseidon: the Staff of Hermes
The Tales of the Heroes of Olympus: The Lost Hero
The Tales of the Heroes of Olympus: The Quest for Buford
The Tales of the Heroes of Olympus: The Son of Neptune
The Tales of the Heroes of Olympus: The Mark of Athena
The Tales of the Heroes of Olympus: The House of Hades
The Tales of the Heroes of Olympus: The Blood of Olympus
The Tales of Magicians and Demigods: The Son of Sobek
The Tales of Magicians and Demigods: The Staff of Serapis
The Tales of Magicians and Demigods: The Crown of Ptolemy
The Tales of Trials of Apollo: The Hidden Oracle

Also if you haven't got the chance feel free to read:

The Tales of Classical Mythology

A crossover with The Tales of series with my dictionary on Greek/Roman Mythology where The Tales of Percy Jackson tells his version of stories behind famous names in Greek and Roman Mythology.

And if you are a fan of Stephen King:

The Tales of the Heroes of the Stand

Which is basically a crossover of The Tales of series with one of Stephen King's best novels The Stand.

Lastly, any one who wants to do a Demigods and Olympian reads story using 'The Tales of the Son of Poseidon' is allowed as long as you inform me about it.

I Recounted What is Known about the Oracle of Trophonius

Being productive.

Ugh.

It's such a human concept. It implies you have limited time (LOL) and have to work hard to make something happen (double LOL). I mean, perhaps if you were laboring away for years writing an opera about the glories of Apollo, I could understand the appeal of being productive. But how can you get a sense of satisfaction and serenity from preparing food? That I did not understand.

Even at Camp Half-Blood I wasn't asked to make my own meals. True, the hot dogs were questionable, and I never found out what sort of bugs were in the bug juice, but at least I'd been served by a cadre of beautiful nymphs.

Now I was compelled to wash lettuce, dice tomatoes, and chop onions.

"Where does this food come from?" I asked, blinking tears from my eyes.

I'm no Demeter, but even I could tell this produce was fresh from the earth, probably because of the amount of dirt I had to wash off.

The thought of Demeter made me think of Meg, which might've caused me to weep even if I hadn't already been afflicted by onion fumes.

Calypso dumped a basket of muddy carrots in front of me. "Emmie's got a garden on the roof. Greenhouses. Year-round growing. You should see the herbs-basil, thyme, rosemary. It's amazing."

Emmie smiled. "Thank you, dear. You definitely know your gardening."

I sighed. Now those two were bonding. Soon I would be stuck between Emmie and Calypso discussing kale-growing techniques and Leo and Josephine waxing poetic about carburetors. I couldn't win.

Speak of the daimon, Leo burst through the door next to the pantry, holding aloft a wheel of cheese like a victor's laurel crown.

"BEHOLD THE CHEDDAR!" he announced. "ALL HAIL THE CHEESE CONQUERORS!"

Josephine, chuckling good naturedly, lumbered in behind him with a metal pail. "The cows seemed to like Leo."

"Hey, abuelita," Leo said. "All da cows love Leo." He grinned at me. "And these cows are red, man. Like... bright red."

That definitely made me want to weep. Red cows were my favorite. For centuries I had a herd of sacred scarlet cattle before cow-collecting went out of fashion.

Josephine must have seen the miserable look on my face.

"We just use their milk," she said hastily. "We don't butcher them."

"I should hope not!" I cried. "Killing red cattle would be sacrilege!"

Josephine didn't look properly terrified by the idea. "Yeah, but mostly it's because Emmie made me give up meat twenty years ago."

"It's much better for you." Emmie chided. "You're not immortal anymore, and you need to take care of yourself."

"But cheeseburgers," Jo muttered.

Leo plunked the cheese wheel in front of me. "Cut me a wedge of this, my good man. Chop-chop!"

I scowled at him. "Don't test me, Valdez. When I am a god again, I will make a constellation out of you. I will call it the Small Exploding Latino."

"I like it!" He patted my shoulder, causing my knife to jiggle.

Did no one fear the wrath of the gods anymore?

While Emmie baked loves of bread-which I must admit smelled incredible-I tossed a salad with carrots, cucumbers, mushrooms, tomatoes, and all manner of roof-grown plant material. Calypso used fresh lemons and cane sugar to make lemonade, while humming tracks from Beyonce's album of the same name. (During our travels west, I had taken it upon myself to catch Calypso up on the last three millennia of popular music.)

Leo cut the cheese. (You can interpret that any way you want.) The cheddar wheel turned out to be bright red all the way through and quite tasty. Josephine made desert, which she said was her specialty. Today this meant fresh berries and homemade sponge cake in sweet red cream, with a meringue topping lightly toasted with a welding torch.

As for the ghost Agamethus, he hovered in one corner of the kitchen, holding his Magic 8 Ball dejectedly as if it were a third place prize from a three-person competition. I hope the Archimedes Sphere does hold some secret to help Agamethus because he might know something we can use.

Finally, we sat down to lunch. I hadn't realized how hungry I was. It had been quite a while since breakfast, and Festus in-flight meal service left much to be desire.

I shoveled my food in while Leo and Calypso told our hosts about our travels west. Between bites of fresh bread with bright red rubber, I added commentary as needed, since of course I had the superior storytelling skills.

We explained ow my ancient foe Python had retaken the original site of Delphi during the second Giant War, cutting off access to the most powerful Oracle. We explained how the Triumvirate had sabotage all forms of communication used by demigods-Iris-messages, magical scrolls, ventriloquist puppets, even the arcane magic of e-mail. With the help of the Python, the three evil emperors were intended to control or destroy all the Oracles from ancient times, thus putting the very future of the world in a stranglehold.

"We freed the Grove of Dodona," I summed up. "But that Oracle simply sent us here to secure the next source of prophecy: the Cave of Trophonius. Alabaster Torrington suggested we seek this place out which is how we know about it," I said.

"What of the sword?" Josephine noted looking at it. "I never thought of you as a swordsman."

"I'm not, but at the time Percy lend it to me, it was the only weapons he can spare." I said as I picked up the sword. "Its called a kopis. Ancient Greeks made it based on Ancient Egyptian style swords. For some reason I sense combination of Greek and Egyptian power in it. Percy thought it could come in handy against the Triumvirate. I don't know how it would help me, but I do know he's right as combining the two powers tend to be more powerful."

"I remember Lady Artemis warning about that," Emmie said. "She said be weary of anyone who combine powers like that."

"That's probably because before that Alexander's successor Ptolemy tried to do to become a god and almost brought down Olympus and ancient Egypt with him," I said. "Zeus been extra paranoid about combining two ancient powers like that since. But according to Percy, he got this sword after having to stop another powerful mortal from doing the same thing. I honestly prefer bow and arrow, but I admit it came in handy whenever I need to arm myself and my bow and quiver is wrapped up tightly to protect it from the weather."

Calypso pointed to my quiver, which lay against the nearest sofa with my borrowed sword. "Apollo, show them your talking arrow."

Emmie's eyes gleamed with the keen interest of an archer. "Talking arrow."

I shuddered. The arrow I had retrieved from the whispering trees of Dodona had so far done me little good. Only I could hear its voice, and whenever I ask its advice, it spouted nonsense in Elizabethan English, which infected my speech patterns and left me talking like a bad Shakespearean actor for hours. This amused Calypso to no end.

"I will not show them my talking arrow," I said. "I will, however share the limerick."

"No!" said Calypso and Leo in unison. They dropped their forks and covered their ears.

I don't blame them as I felt the same way when I first heard the prophecy. I recited:

"There once was a god named Apollo
Who plunged in a cave blue and hollow
Upon a three-seater
The Bronze fire-eater
Who forced death and madness to swallow

Around the table, an uncomfortable silence fell.

Josephine glowered. "Never before has any voice dared to utter a limerick in this house, Apollo.

"And let us hope no one will ever do so again," I agreed. "But such was the prophecy of Dodona that brought us here."

Emmie's expression tightened, removing any lingering doubts that this was the same Hemithea I had immortalized so many centuries ago. I recognize the intensity in her eyes-the same determination that had sent her over the cliff, trusting her fate to the gods.

"'A cave blue and hollow'... That's the Oracle of Trophonius all right." she said. "Alabaster may of not know it, but he told you where you needed to go by telling you about this place. The Oracle is located in the Bluespring Caverns, about eighty miles south of town."

Leo grinned as he chewed, his mouth avalanched of earth-toned food particles. "Easiest quest ever, then. We wake Festus up, then we look up this place on Google Maps and fly down there."

"Doubtful," Josephine said. "The emperor has the surrounding countryside heavily guarded. You couldn't fly a dragon anywhere near Bluespring without getting shot out of the sky. Even if you could, the cave entrance are all way too small for a dragon to plunge into."

Leo pouted. "But the limerick-"

"May be deceptive," I said. "It is, after all, a limerick."

Calypso sat forward. "What about the last line?" she asked. "Apollo will be forced death and madness to swallow."

Josephine stared at her empty plate. Emmie gave her hand a quick squeeze.

"The Oracle of Trophonius is dangerous," Emmie said. "Even when we had free access to it, before the emperor moved in, we would only consult the spirit in extreme emergencies." SHe turned to me. "You must remember. You were the god of prophecy."

Despite the excellent lemonade, my throat felt parched. I didn't like being reminded of what I used to be. I also didn't like the gigantic holes in my memory, filled with nothing but vague dread.

"When Zeus made me mortal, he took away most of my memories," I explained, "But I do recall the cave was dangerous..." I said. "I... uh... may of never asked what kind of trials the petitioners went through."

"You never asked." Emmie's voice took on a dangerous edge.

"But I did some reading at Camp Half-Blood," I said defensively. "There wasn't much about Trophonius. Chiron couldn't help, either."

"But that book Percy had gave more info didn't it?" Leo asked.

I smiled at Leo's reminder. Before he went back home, Percy dug deeper into the book my son Halcyon Green gave him and found more about each oracle. Hal may of gave Percy the book to help him with his destiny, but it turned out to be helpful for me too."

"That's right. It did give a bit more on Trophonius. It's prophecies were dark and scary. Sometimes they drove people insane. Petitioners drinking from the two separate springs of memory and forgetfulness-"

"Wouldn't the two springs, like cancel each other out?" Leo interrupted.

I shook my head. "No but it can drive you insane and can kill you thus the prophecy words swallow death and madness. But if the practitioners survive that, then the practitioners minds would be prepared for the Oracle. Then they descend into the cave and then descend into the cave and experience.. Untold horrors. Trophonius would fill your mind with bits of nightmarish verse that, if assembled properly, became a prophecy. Once you stumble out of the cave-assuming you lived and weren't driven permanently insane-the priest would sit you down on the Throne of Memory. The verses would come spilling out of your mouth. A priest would write them down, and voila! There's your prophecy. With any luck, your mind would return to normal."

"What if the petitioner couldn't use the throne?" Calypso asked.

Leo snickered. "Use the throne."

Calypso glared at him.

"Sorry." Leo tried to look serious, which for him was always a losing battle."

"If the petitioner couldn't use the throne, there would be no way to extract the bits of verse from their mind. The petitioner would be stuck with those horrors forever," Josephine finished. "That's what happened to our daughter. The cave drove her mad because the emperor had control of the Throne of memory."

A cold draft swept across my neck, as if the Waystation itself had let out a forlorn sigh. I thought about the apocalypse I'd seen crayoned on the wall of the child's now abandoned bedroom.

"What do you mean?" I asked. "What happened?"

Emmie tore a piece of bread crust. She let the pieces fall. "Once the emperor came to Indianapolis... this New Hercules..."

Calypso started to ask a question, but Emmie raised a hand. "Please, dear, don't ask me to name him. Not here. Not now. As I'm sure you know, many gods and monsters hear you when you speak their names. He is worse than most."

A pang of sympathy pulled at the corner of Calypso's mouth. "Please go on."

"At first," Emmie said, "we didn't understand what was happening. Our friends and companions began to disappear." She gestured around her at the vast living area. "We used to have a dozen or so living here at any given time. Now... we're all that's left."

"Alabaster didn't say anything about that," I said.

"That's because it happened after he left here," Emmie explained.

Josephine leaned back in her chair. In the light of the rose window, her hair gleamed the same steel gray as the wrenches in her coverall pockets. "The emperor was looking for us. But like I said, this isn't an easy place to find unless we invite you in. That's why Alabaster told you to seek us out. So, instead, his forces waited until our people were outside. They took our friends a few at a time."

"Took them?" I asked. "As in alive?"

"Oh, yeah." Josephine grim tone made it sound as if death would've been preferable. "The emperor loves prisoners. He captured our guests, our griffins."

A berry slipped out of Leo's fingers. "Griffins? Uh... Hazel and Frank told me about griffins. They fought some in Alaska. Said they were like rabid hyenas with wings."

Josephine smirked. "The small ones, the wild ones, can be, yeah. But we raised the best here. At least... we did. Our last mating pair disappeared about a month ago. Heloise and Abelard. We let them out to hunt-they have to do that to stay healthy. They never returned. For Georgina, that was the final insult."

A bad feeling began to nag at me. This was beyond the sort of 'we're talking about creepy things that might get me killed' I be worried about. The griffins nest in the niches above us. A distant memory about my sister's followers. A comment Nero had made in my vision: that the New Hercules was obsessed with destroying the House of Nets, as if that were another name for the Waystation... I felt like someone's shadow was falling over the dining table, someone I should know, perhaps someone I should be running away from.

Emmie looked at Agamethus, her eyes as sharp as arrow points. Agamethus bowed slightly, his bloody tunic glowing in various shades of nacho topping. "Georgina got into her head that the only way to save the Waystation and find the captives was to consult the Oracle. She'd always been drawn to the place. She didn't fear it the way most people did. One night she slipped away. Agamethus helped her. We don't know exactly how they got there-"

The ghost shook his Magic 8 Ball. He tossed it to Emmie, who frowned at the answer on the bottom.

"'It was ordained,'" she read. "I don't know what you mean, you old, dead fool, but she was just a child. Without the throne you knew what would happen to her!"

Before anything else could be said, the entire hall shuddered. Plates and cups rattled on the dining table. Agamethus vanished in a flash of nacho orange. At the top of the barreled ceiling, the green and brown stained-glass panels darkened as if a cloud had blackened out the sun.

Josephine rose. "Waystation, what's happening on the roof?"

As far as I could tell, the building didn't respond. No brick shot out of the wall. No doors banged open and shut in Morse code.

Emmie set the Magic 8 ball on the table. "The rest of you, stay here. Jo and I will check it out."

Calypso frowned. "But-"

"That's an order," Emmie said. 'I'm not losing anymore guests."

"It can't be Com-" Josephine stopped herself. "It can't be him. Maybe Heloise and Abelard are back?"

"Maybe." Emmie didn't sound convinced. "But just in case..."

The two women moved quickly to a metal supply cabinet in the kitchen. Emmie grabbed her bow and quiver. Josephine pulled out an old fashioned machine gun with a circular drum magazine between the two handles.

Leo nearly choked on his dessert. "Is that a tommy gun?"

Josephine patent the weapon affectionately. "This is Little Bertha. A reminder of my sordid past life that Lady Artemis let me keep, as she allow us keep any weapon we had when we joined the hunt if we had any. I'm sure there's nothing to worry about. You all sit tight."

With that comforting advice our heavily armed hosts marched off to check the roof.

A/N: I added that last bit about hunters keeping weapons they had prior of joining Artemis as it goes with the fact Thalia had her Aegis still after joining.

Oh by 'almost destroyed ancient Egypt' was Apollo's way of saying Ptolemy almost destroyed the Egyptian Gods too.

And as to remind you how Apollo felt about Dodona's prophecy being a limerick, the title of the chapter that the prophecy is given in is called: 'No! Not That Anything but That! Anything but a Limerick!'