AN: You will see similarities between small bits of New Moon and this story because they have to happen in order for things to be understood. Also, I might update a little less frequently. School has be completely bogged down right now and I'd rather update twice a month than continue updating once a week for the next ten weeks and leave you hanging till after my finals. So, it's only the second week of school so we'll see if my homework load settles down or I learn how to handle it better.

"I start to think there really is no cure for depression, that happiness is an ongoing battle, and I wonder if it is one I'll have to fight for as long as I live. I wonder if it's worth it."

ELIZABETH WURZTEL

Cupid's Chokehold; Chapter Eight. Jacob.

She continued to hold onto my hand and I wrapped my other hand around hers, her hands were cold, like ice. She wouldn't look at me, her breathing was short and shallow. I brought my hand to her chin and turned her face towards me, big tears were in her eyes and they dropped once she blinked. It hurt me to see her cry but I needed to know everything, "Who's Victoria?"

"I have a lot to explain, can I ask you a question first?" she shook her head and gritted her teeth. I could feel the vice tighten on my heart, if it made her feel better she could do whatever the hell she wanted to do.

"You can ask me anything, Bells, you should know that," I pushed small strands of hair out of her face and wiped the salty tears away.

"Will you help me with my senior project? I need to learn a job skill. I was thinking we could do something with my truck, of course this was before it broke down."

I laughed lightly and held her close, wrapping my arms around her. Only Bella could defuse a situation like that, "Of course, Bella," instead of pulling back like I had expected her to she leaned into my embrace, "Why don't you want to talk about this vampire?" he asked calmly.

"Just listen."

She told me everything and my heart grew tighter as I listened to her recount her tale, a story that would make Edger Allen Poe shiver in terror. Bella told me about what had happened last spring.

"So, wait a minute," I grabbed her wrist and outlined the scar again.

"Yeah," was all she said. A tight shock of dread and disgust went through me.

"You're not to go near that vampire, I could have lost you!"

"What am I supposed to do Jacob? She's working at my school!" she pulled her hands through her hair, "Just let me finish, okay?" She went on to tell me about how a vampire named Laurent came back.

"We killed him," I said, hoping to see a grin light up her face.

She looked up at me, relief soared through her face. She moved so quickly I was taken a back, her legs straddled my own and her weak arms clung to me, "Thank you, Jacob," I came back to my senses and wrapped my arms around her, savoring her temporary loss of composure. She pulled away, "You're not hurt are you?"

I laughed, "Of course not, Bella. We are made to hunt and destroy vampires, no one got hurt, I promise you."

"I can't have you getting hurt, Jake. If you got hurt, Jake, I wouldn't have anyone to turn to. It's hard enough to talk to Charlie about this—"

"You told him?" I had thought Bella would have been smart enough to realize that the vampires and werewolves were not something that was to be spread around like pictures of some new celebrity baby.

"No! And that's what I mean! When I go home and Charlie asks what I did, asks why I'm upset, it's hard to explain. It's hard to come up with something to tell him. Maybe you haven't noticed, Jacob, but I'm not the best liar," I smiled, that was certainly true.

"I won't get hurt. I won't leave you, Bells. Ever. I can't," she readjusted her fingers more tightly around my hand, "Can you continue?"

She nodded and mutely noticed her position on my lap, she sat back down on her own cushion but held tight to my hand. She went on with her morbid story. Anger pulsed within me, somehow Victoria had gotten a job at the school. Protecting her there would be hard, Sam was the only one not going to school and he had obligations during the day. I knew having the pack's grades suffer in order to protect Bella wasn't the best option—which was why I would be the only one to be on Bella's school campus. I would escort her to and from school, I would stay near her classroom.

If I saw an open and safe opportunity I could take the leach down, otherwise we would have to widen the area we ran through. We hadn't come across her scent yet and if she had a job now that had to mean she was nearby.

This could be solved, "I just don't know what she wants, Jake. I mean, I know what she wants, she wants to kill me. But, she can just sneak through my window and off me in my sleep—" it pained me to hear Bella speak so bluntly about dying "—why does she need to be at my school too? School was my safe place," she gasped, her eyes widened and she looked at me, "and here of course."

"We'll figure it out, Bells. We have to. I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe," I pressed my lips to her hair, she pulled away and got up from the couch. I worried that I had pushed her too far. I hadn't thought anything of the kiss, but I had to keep in mind that this was Bella. I had to remember everything she had gone through, everything she was still going through.

"It's just," she bit her pouty lip, trying to find the right words, "have you ever thought that maybe I'm not worth it? Maybe, that all this trying to keep me safe is just a waste of time? I mean, come on Jake, it's been what a few days since you guys upped the running stuff and you're already exhausted. I don't think you can last a few more weeks. And what's going to happen if the problem with Victoria isn't resolved in a couple weeks. Maybe this is just futile," she turned around and headed towards the hallway, grabbing her jacket and bag on the way there.

I ran to catch her arm and I pulled her closer, "You are worth it, Bella."

"You're just saying that because of this silly imprint thing," she shook her head and tried to pull away from me.

In truth, I was, but it was all true, "You are worth it. You need to believe that and I'm not going to let you leave until you agree with me," I took her coat and bag out of her hands and wrapped my arm around her shoulders, conveniently locking her in place.

"You can't make me stay here."

"You don't have a car."

"I can walk."

"It's 15 miles back to town and that's not including getting back to your house."

She looked around the room and her eyes stopped on my keys, "I'll take your car."

"Grand theft auto," it stung, "You want to get away from me that bad."

Her face dropped and she stopped struggling against me, "I don't want to get away from you Jake. I just want to get away from this. I want to be normal again and just lead a normal life. You know? It's just… is that too much to ask for?"

Her words broke my heart, I wanted to be able to give her that normal life. I wanted to be able to give her that more than I wanted to breathe. Which was ironic because the only reason I wanted to make her feel better so badly was because I wasn't normal. Of course, I had cared for Bella, maybe even loved her, before I had phased but the emotion and feeling was much more intense now. I can't say if I would have gone as far as I would now pre-change.

"Of course not, Bella. I want you to have that. But, you have to trust me. You have to let me help you," I placed my hands on her shoulders, loose enough for her to leave, but she didn't.

"I can't have you getting hurt, Jacob. You're far too important to me," I absorbed her words, cherished them. But I didn't have the time to wallow in those words; I had to quell her fears. I took hold of her hand and walked her into the kitchen.

"Bella, I can't get hurt anymore," she looked ready to criticize my words. I grabbed a knife from off the cutting board and struck my hand. Her eyes widened, her face paled, her jaw shuddered, her breathing became labored. She covered her mouth, her widened, terrified eyes slowly become confused as the slash healed before any blood could escape.

"What the hell was that about Jacob?"

"I can't get hurt anymore, Bella," I repeated, "I heal too fast," she looked up at me, absorbing everything in. She blinked, slowly, and huge tears dripped down her cheeks.

"Oh my God."

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