"The individual must not merely wait and criticize, he must defend the cause the best he can. The fate of the world will be such as the world deserves."
ALBERT EINSTEIN

Cupid's Chokehold; Chapter Twenty. Jacob.

Bella groaned and wrapped her arms around my waist, I felt disgusting that it made my heart surge with longing, but I couldn't exactly help myself. I hated myself for loving her so much when she barely returned the same feelings; I knew that the pressure to return them was stifling her. But, that was just my Bella being Bella. I wasn't purposefully doing anything to pressure her she was pressuring herself. If it weren't for the complaining I would have thought that she enjoyed the stress she sometimes brought onto herself.

"Don't give me that option! I might take it!"

A thought sprung to life in my mind, "Maybe you'd be safer. We could go visit your mom, she's in," I grasped for the state, "F-florida, right?"

"Jake, you know I can't do that. I'm graduating soon and, as much as I hate it, you should be here for…your…pack. It's not fair to them."

She was right, but where did my loyalty lie in the end? Could I put Bella's life at stake to help my brothers or could I put my brothers life on the line in order to protect Bella? My choice wasn't always my own these days, was this an instance where it would be made for me?

"Besides, running isn't going to help. She'll probably just find me again."

"Then we run faster," I cupped her cheek with my hand she let me. My hot skin wasn't uncomfortable; it didn't bother me in the vary least, but for some reason her skin was like a Popsicle on a summer day. Of course, she didn't melt in my hands… not like I wanted her to.

"Jake!" her hand grabbed my own, not to stop the connection though as she still held my hand tight in her own. She took a step back and stared off into the distance, her hand holding tight to her buoy. "I don't want my life to be like this! It's too stressful! It'll give me ulcers or something. I just want her gone," she wilted like a flower under a heater and I sat down next to her.

"We're working on it. We're working as hard as we can," with her hand still in mine I wrapped my other arm around her waist. Guilt spread across her face but she sunk into my shoulder.

"Oh, Jake, I didn't mean to complain or anything it's just—I don't know. It's not like I'm ungrateful for what you guys are doing, I just wish it was easier."

"We all do, Bells. Just keep in mind that we really enjoy the chase."

She groaned, "I don't want you getting—"

"Don't say it," I covered her mouth. She sighed into it and when I didn't relent she stuck her tongue out. I wiped my hand off, "Besides, Bells, I'm not going out anymore. I have strict orders, orders from Sam which means I have to follow them, to stay as close to you as possible. Charlie obviously has no problems with me staying at your house," a fact I was gleefully delighted in, "and when you go back to school I'll just stay in the parking lot."

"But that means your school work will suffer!"

"It's just my junior year, it doesn't really matter."

"That statement alone means you're not going often enough," she said dryly.

I ruffled her hair, "It doesn't matter for me, Bells. I'm tied to this land. I couldn't go away to college, even if I wanted to, which I don't."

She inched away from me as if my lack of educational drive would wear off on her, "I can't believe that you would so willingly let yourself be tied to something," she said softly.

"I'm tied to you," I spoke back, trying to steer away from college.

She drooped, I had steered away from college and crashed right into the topic Bella didn't want to acknowledge the most. "That's different, Jake," her voice was becoming impossibly soft, "I can move. This land can't."

"We've had an earthquake or two!"

My joke work, she smiled, shoved me to the side, but came with me. "You know that's not what I meant!"

"Bells, it's something I've grown up knowing. You've been told you'll go to college, for you that's your one destiny." It hurt knowing she'd be away from me, but the truth tends to do that, "I've always known I'd stay here, even last year when I was that scrawny nothing you tried so hard to flirt with, I knew I didn't want to leave here. It's a part of me," I sifted the sand between my fingers. I looked over at her, she was drawing butterfly images in the sand with her hands. You're a part of me.

She didn't respond as if she had heard my thoughts. Seconds flitted by, minutes passed, almost an entire half hour had gone by before she spoke again. "Can we go finish the stupid truck now?"

"It's not stupid, I thought you loved that truck!"

"Oh, I do love it, doesn't mean I like it right now."

&

"I think we're done," the repairs to her truck had been surprisingly easy. It was only temporary, what we had done today was only life support for the vehicle. The plug would need to be pulled soon.

"Really?" she seemed so happy at the prospect of her truck being in working order again. But, it meant Bella would have less of an inclination to see me. Unless her hands this morning and in the car meant something more than a deep sense of caring, Bella would have no real desire to see me as often as she was now. No imprint that I knew of had been this challenging before, even Sam's. Emily had felt guilty for what she was doing to Leah, but she hadn't been in love with another man when Sam had imprinted. I assumed that Bella still was in love with the leech, that had to be why—why we weren't—why she wouldn't—

I was giving myself too much credit.

"I was thinking, Bells, that maybe we could do something to, like, celebrate. A little congratulatory dinner and movie thing or something."

She turned away from me and fiddled with the based of the antenna. Crap, I pushed. "Dinner and a movie sounds like a date, Jake."

"It doesn't have to be."

She stood there, thinking, twisting the metal base between her fingers. Her teeth taunted me as they bit her lip. She took a deep breath and released it, "Okay, Jake. Dinner and a movie. I pay for my dinner and I pay for my ticket," she paused, considering something, "and I drive."

"Fair enough," I smiled at her and she smiled back. For just one moment things were absolutely normal. "Wanna head back over to Sam and Emily's?

"Sure."

So, it wasn't a date. And I didn't want it to be. No, I did want it to be a date. But I didn't want it to be a date until she wanted it to be a date. Bella was driving this boat, and whether or not she kept hitting sandbars and choppy water I was staying on with her.

I wasn't giving up on her.

AN: So, I noticed this a day too late, but as of December 4th this story was a year old. Mind you, there were months where I did very little work on it and that's the reason it's so short for a years worth of writing. As of right now this story will be around 30-35 chapters. It's been brought to my attention that I need to speed things up.

Anyway, my papers are done, my finals are all but over, my wrist is almost healed and this is the last chapter I have so I better go type fast! Hopefully I'll get another chapter up next week, though I have no promises. If I don't get another chapter up next week, expect on middle of January. Sorry!!!