Disclaimer: The Walt Disney Company owns all rights to the characters and situations associated with Kim Possible. I borrow Kim, her family and friends for no monetary gain. I do this only to empty my mind of these stories that keep cluttering it up.
Author's Note: I'll remind you again that I'm going to be messing with KP canon here. This is mostly an AU story.
Also, I normally use italics to emphasize a word but there is a quote in this chapter that I italicized too. You'll see it when it comes up.
The Closet II
Chapter 4
Round Three
Kim and Ron finished breakfast then went upstairs to dress into their mission clothes. Kim always kept a spare set in his room along with various other items of clothing for emergencies and now the clothes could be use for training and afterward too. Of course Ron had a few spare pairs of cargo pants and red hockey jerseys along with a set of mission wear stashed away in Kim's room as well.
Even though Ron's parents were downstairs reading the newspaper and/or washing the morning dishes, Kim and Ron stripped out of their pajamas and donned their mission clothes right in front of each other. After all, Ron had seen Kim with nothing on but a towel wrapped around her hair and they had twice masturbated in front of each other during the previous twenty-four hours. Being nude if front of each other while changing their clothes was no big to them now.
They went outside and disassembled the makeshift exercise equipment, putting everything back in its proper place, before they started in on their training.
Kim took Ron by the hand and led him over to the big oak tree where she sat them down facing each other. "Ron, what we're going to do today is start with the beginning moves. I know you know a few different kicks and punches but you sometimes do things wrong, like when you tried to take out Drakken's giant robot last week."
Ron remembered the robot created from the different parts of the Nakasumi assembly line and defensively said, "But I thought my flying kick was pretty good KP."
"The technique to your flying kick was very good Ron," Kim assured her blond friend with a congratulatory pat on his knee, "but you yelled out exactly what you were doing so Drakken and everybody else in the lair knew you were performing a flying kick. That's why he was able to capture you by the leg."
"But they yell out like that in a lot of those Hong Kong, chop-sake movies," Ron countered. "If it works in the movies why shouldn't it work in real life?"
"Movies aren't real life," Kim firmly countered Ron's counter. "You don't want to announce what moves you're going to throw at them or show off what style you're going to use before you attack like they do in those Hong Kong flicks you love to watch. When you do that you're expending energy you'll need for the fight and it lets your opponent know exactly what style to prepare for. You don't see me or Shego doing it when we fight, do you?"
"No, I don't," Ron pondered as he scratched his head. "I guess it is pretty dumb to run through a five or ten second kata just to warm up and tip your hand in the process."
"That's right," Kim nodded to him, proud that he understood her point. "Now what I'm going to do this morning is the same thing Ed Parker, a famous Hollywood Karate instructor, did for Joe Hyams, a writer for the New York Herald Tribune, back in the 1950's. Mr. Parker said, and I quote, 'I'm not going to show you my art. I'm going to share it with you. If I show it to you it will become an exhibition, and in time it will be pushed so far into the back of your mind that it will be lost. But by sharing it with you, you will not only retain it forever, but I, too, will improve.' Ron," Kim said as she stood up and held out her hand to help him to his feet, "it's time for me to start sharing my sixteen styles of martial arts with you."
And that's exactly what she did.
Kim started with the basic punches, kicks and blocks. She would occasionally stop to correct his stance or arm and leg position but they mainly stood face to face and practiced the moves on each other. Three hours later they broke for a light lunch. After the dishes were washed, dried and put away Kim and Ron headed to the backyard for another session. They were only five minutes into practicing and perfecting their side kicks when Kim's cell phone rang.
"Hello?" Kim answered, not looking at the caller I.D.
"Hey Kim, it's Josh," came the voice on the other end of the call.
"Josh," Kim evenly stated, unsure if she wanted to talk to him at that particular time. She'd had one great evening and one horrendous date with him and wasn't sure where their future lie.
"I was wondering if you'd like to get together again," Josh began, sounding suave and nonchalant. "I had a great time yesterday in the park and thought we could continue the good times today."
"Is that Josh?" Ron whispered in Kim's free ear, trying hard not to be heard on the other end of the phone conversation. Ron knew it was Josh Mankey and he saw the indecision written on Kim's face about the guy. "If it is you need to go out with him again. You gotta give him a chance."
Kim shot Ron a stern look for the interruption but softened the glower when she realized he was only trying to help in his own goofy way. But she also thought she would have to get Josh away from anything having to do with painting if their date would be any fun. So, "Of course Josh, I'd love to get together with you again. Why don't you come over to my house and we can watch a movie or something."
"That sounds great," Josh enthused. "I'll come over in, say, a half hour?"
"Great," Kim half-heartedly enthused back. "I'll see you in a half hour." She turned off the phone and stared at the small device in her hand, unsure where dating Josh was going and definitely unsure if she even wanted to find out.
"So get going KP," Ron excitedly yelled as he began to usher Kim out of his backyard toward her house. "You'll need to take a shower and get dressed before he arrives. You don't got much time!"
"Have much time Ron," Kim corrected Ron's grammar. "I don't have much time." Even though she was a little tweaked at Ron's misuse of the English language, Kim smiled inwardly. Ron was half leading her out of the backyard with his right hand firmly gripping her right wrist while his left hand was on her butt, pushing her along. She knew Josh's reputation as a gentleman wouldn't allow him to take such forward liberties with a girl, it just wasn't proper. But it seemed Ron wasn't even thinking about propriety. He was simply concerned about getting Kim to her date. Their familiarity over the past decade as best friends led Ron to believe that touching Kim on the bottom was okay and she realized she liked it. She like it a lot and allowed Ron to push her along until they were in the front yard.
"Alright, I'm going," Kim sternly said as she stepped away from Ron's grasp and turned to him. "But what will you do while Josh and I are at my house?"
"Don't worry KP," Ron smoothly said and thumbed over his shoulder. "I'll just continue practicing the moves you showed me and if I get too bored I'll go and work on some more future homework."
"You don't need to do that. You've already…" Kim started to protest before she was soundly stopped by one of Ron's finger on her lips.
"KP, I want to do it. I've slacked off enough over the years to last me ten school lifetimes. Now leave Potential Boy alone and go enjoy your date."
Kim sternly looked at her lifelong friend and saw the earnestness in his eyes. She warmly smiled at his joke, quickly turned and ran off to her house to get ready for round three, the deciding date in her mind, with Joshua Mankey. She silently vowed to herself that the best two out of three would be the deciding factor in her relationship with Josh.
Ron watched Kim run down the block before he pulled a sleepy naked mole rat from his pocket. "Rufus old buddy, how about I treat us to some Naco-licious-ness?"
"Nacos?" The thought of all that cheesy goodness instantly woke up the mole rat. "BooYah!" Rufus glanced around and suddenly became slightly pensive. "Kim?"
"Kim's on a date with Monkey Boy," Ron answered his rodent friend, well knowing where this conversation was leading. After all, he and Rufus thought the same way and Ron knew that Rufus knew all about the rewards system Kim had put in place. "What Kim doesn't know won't hurt her and we have plenty of time to sneak off for a Naco or five before her date is over. And besides, the training went well today so we deserve a reward."
Rufus thought it over for one second before he nodded his approval of the plan. After all, Ron's reasons were reasonable and he was hungry since lunch was a whole ten or fifteen minutes ago.
Kim made it home and got showered and dressed before Josh arrived. She even had time to set out a variety of videos along with some snacks and soft drinks in front of the television for the get-together before she ran back upstairs to finish brushing her luscious red locks.
Unfortunately, when the doorbell did ring the Tweebs got to the front door before Kim could get back downstairs.
"Hi," Jim said as he opened the door.
"You must be Josh, Kim's date," Tim continued.
"Are you and Kim going to be kissing on the couch?" they both asked in unison before a stunned Josh could gather his wits and get a word out.
"That's none of your business," Kim harshed to the twins as she practically flew down the stairs to intervene.
"Come on boys," Mrs. Dr. Possible said as she entered the hallway from the kitchen, took her coat off the hook near the front door and put it on. "You two are coming with me to the mall for some new school clothes."
"Awww, but we want to observe them," Jim moaned in disappointment.
"Yeah," Tim added. "We want to definitively prove that cooties exist."
"And the only way to do that is by detecting, capturing and observing them as they breed," Jim finished as the twins each pulled out a weird gadget that looked somewhat like a homemade ray gun with a parabolic dish mounted on the front of the barrel and a sandwich bag hanging from the butt of the pistol to capture and contain the ever elusive wild cootie.
"You can experiment on Kim and her boyfriend another day," Dr. Possible chuckled as she hustled the twins out the door, "right now we need to get to the mall." She watched her two boys run over to the van and hop in before she turned to the two teens. Ann saw the confusion and concern in Josh's eyes from his first encounter with the Tweebs. "Don't worry Josh, those two will forget all about cooties and move on to their next experiment before tomorrow. Kim, your father had to go in to the space center to prepare for that rocket launch in a few days. He'll be working late tonight but the boys and I will be home in three or four hours. It was nice to meet you Josh, have fun kids." With that said and a wave of the hand over her shoulder, Ann Possible got in the van and drove away.
"Well, that was interesting," Josh was able to say before he was unceremoniously yanked inside the house by his slightly tweaked, redheaded date.
"RONALD DEAN STOPPABLE!" Kim screamed at the top of her lungs as she slammed open the door and stomped into the restaurant.
"Oh Mannn," Ron groaned and slunk low in the bench seat of their regular booth at Bueno Nacho to try and hide.
Rufus looked over the edge of the container of melted cheese he was eating/swimming in and, after seeing the fiery redhead and her mood, quickly submerged again with a groaning, "Uh oh."
"Ron!" Kim hollered, not quite as loud as when she first enter the room. She quick marched over to the table and leaned on it, "I thought we had an understanding. You're only supposed to go to Bueno Nacho if you do well in your training and schoolwork."
"And I thought you were on a date with Mankey," Ron swiftly shot back trying to change the subject while also trying to finish off his second Naco of the visit by moving it up to his mouth. "You've only been gone for less than a half hour." Ron took a big bite of the Naco and began to noisily crunch away.
Being one of the best natural distracters in the world, Ron's ploy had worked.
"Yeah, well," Kim slumped into the seat opposite him and, dejectedly putting her chin in hands, spilled the story. "My date with Monkey Boy didn't turn out like I'd planned. He showed up just as mom and the Tweebs were leaving." Kim's emotions did a complete one hundred eighty degree turn as she lightly laughed, "Josh got a dose of the Tweebs and their never ending quest to capture a live cootie. Anyway," her demeanor flip-flopped once again, "after they left, he had the gall to bring his art supplies into the house. He wanted to paint a portrait of me while I watched a movie."
"What's so bad about that?" Ron asked before he finished off the Naco then licked his fingers.
"He…" Kim angrily shouted before she glanced around the room to make sure no one was listening in on their conversation. She noticed Bonnie Rockwaller was over in her regular corner booth holding court with a few of her sycophants so Kim lowered her voice to a whisper as she leaned over the table, "…He wanted to do a nude portrait, Ron."
"And again, what's so bad about that?" Ron begged in his normal voice, now paying full attention to his best friend after a quick slurp of his soda. "I've seen you like that only this morning when we changed clothes in my room. We talked about it yesterday and you said…"
"I know what I said," Kim hushed to him as she quickly got up and swung around the table so she was sitting next to him on the same bench seat, "but that's just between you and me. I have a reputation to uphold now. Little girls all over the world are emailing my website writing that they want to grow up just like me. What would they say if a picture of me in the nu… if the painting became public?"
"I don't know," Ron nonchalantly said and shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe that you're a strong, confident person who's not afraid to show her inner and outer beauty?"
"You really think I'm beautiful?" Kim coyly shied away and blushed a bit as she swept a strand of non-errant hair from her face behind her ear.
"Sha, Kim," Ron said with his goofy smile beaming bright. "You're not only beautiful but you radiate gorgeousness with your beautilific green eyes and lusciously loveable red locks and you have a body most models would starve themselves for."
Kim's blush deepened and she tittered like a schoolgirl from the compliment before she reined in her emotions and clearly stated, "Anyway, Josh is history now. I gave him the boot and told him, in no uncertain terms, what he could do with his paint brushes. That also means you and I are now officially boyfriend and girlfriend."
Before Ron could respond to the announcement they were interrupted by Ned, the newly appointed assistant manager. "Hey Stoppable," the freckle-faced nerdy looking boy said in his nasally voice as he walked up to the booth, "the guys up at corporate wanted me to give you this." Ned handed a white business envelop to Ron and waited to see the contents.
"Naco royalty check?" Ron wondered aloud as he read the front of the envelop.
"Yeah," Ned enthused. "It's your first check. Last year, you and Kim were called out on a mission just after I served you your food and I watched as you stuffed your nachos into a soft taco. Kim thought it was disgusting but you just told her you called it a Naco before you both raced off. I talked the guys up at corporate about the incident and they said it was the perfect item for people on the go so they started selling it. If I understand correctly, you're suppose to receive a nickel for every Naco we sell."
"I remember that," Ron said in deep thought as he scratched his chin. "I thought you put the Naco on the menu because Kim and I come in here so often."
"Go ahead and open it Ron," Kim egged on her newly designated boyfriend. "Maybe you'll have enough to take us out to the movies tonight."
Ron ripped open the envelop and pulled out the check and a letter. Kim grabbed the letter and read it aloud, "Mr. Stoppable. In appreciation for your Grande sized contribution to the Bueno Nacho menu, we submit to you our sincere Gracias and this check. As compensation, you will now be receiving a nickel for every Naco we sell and we would like you to know that worldwide sales of this Delicioso dish are through the roof of our humble restauranté. We beg of you to think of us if you have any more culinary ideas. Again, Mucho Gracias and have a Muy Bueno day. Signed, Juan Valdez, Presidenté, Bueno Nacho Corporation." Kim quickly scanned the letter again then turned to Ron and said, "Wow, world wide sales! That must mean the check is a little larger than I thought. So, how much is it for?"
"Kim, it's for ni-ni-nine…" Ron stuttered with a wide-eyed, shocked expression on his face.
Kim snatched the check from Ron's hands and checked it out. Her face showed a great deal of shock too as she yelled, "It's for Ninety-Nine Million Dollars!"
Before either teen could blink an eye, Kim had someone draped across her lap and Ron had that same someone's arms wrapped around his neck. "Ron Stoppable," the teal-eyed brunette squealed in delight, "you are such a hottie."
"Bonnie!" Kim groused and barely resisted the urge to pull up the hem of Bonnie Rockwaller's short lavender dress and give the obnoxious girl a few good whacks on the bottom which was practically in Kim's face. "Are you saying that just because Ron is now a multi-millionaire?"
"Of course not K," Bonnie snarked back but gave Ron a peck on the cheek then tickled his earlobe with a finger. "That's only part of the reason. With Ron Ron's big ears and hands, his dick is probably large too and I'm turning in to a young, nubile sex hungry, slut so him being wealthy only makes him even more desirable! I would've eventually gotten around to chasing after Ron during our senior year when my reputation could take a minor hit but now…"
"That's what I thought," Kim groused aloud to herself. She unceremoniously shoved the brunette out of the way, onto the table and swiftly took her newly designated boyfriend's hand in hers. "Come on Ron. We need to get you home!"
"Right KP!" Ron snatched up Rufus from his now empty cheese bowl and was unceremoniously dragged out of the restaurant before Bonnie could glomp onto the blond boy again.
Author's Note: The Ed Parker quote is taken from Joe Hyam's book Zen In The Martial Arts, published by Bantam Books in 1979. It's a very interesting read.