I know it's been a while since I UD'd, but RL got in the way :( Hopefully things have calmed down now so I'll be updating more frequently.
Hope you like it.
R&R
x
"Hodgins?"
"Yeah Ange?"
"You OK?"
"I will be."
"If you want to talk I'm here."
"I know. Thanks."
Booth groaned as the alarm clock woke him up. He leaned over to turn it off and looked down at the woman lying practically on top of him. Her head on his chest, her legs in between his and her hand in his. He smiled and wondered how he ever got so lucky. It had been just over a year since they had got together. As he turned the alarm off, he glanced at the date and instantly got anxious. Last year she had stayed over at Angela's, which he accepted because he knew that Angela had spent a lot of time with both her and Hodgins after it happened. This year Brennan had wanted to stay with Booth. Her eyes fluttered open as Booth got out of bed and kissed her temple.
"Morning." Booth said.
"Morning Booth." Booth went out of the room and got in the shower. Brennan got out of bed and went to mark another day of the calendar, like she always did. As she was crossing of the day she saw the date. Tears immediately sprang to her eyes, but she managed to blink them away. She stood completely still until she heard the shower turn off and Booth come out of the bathroom.
"You OK?" Booth asked.
"Yeah. Fine. Why wouldn't I be?" Brennan asked. She meant it to come out calm, but it came out snappy. "Sorry Booth." She said sighing.
"Don't worry."
"No but you aren't like this with me when you're having a rough day."
"Yeah but-"
"No buts. Even when it's the day when it happened to you, you're still nice to me. I'm sorry. I really am."
"I know baby. Don't worry OK? Do you want to take a day off?"
"No. I can't. I've got three sets of remains coming in today from China and I really want to examine them."
"OK. Well I've got meetings until 3, but I'll come and pick you up from work at 6. I'll ring you when I'm out OK?"
"Booth you don't need to. I'm fine."
"I know. But I'm not." Booth knew that she would have to comply to his requests if she felt that he needed it. "I almost lost you Bones. I almost never told you I love you."
"OK." Brennan said, knowing what he was doing. She was thankful for it, because she would never be able to ask him to do that normally. "I love you."
"Love you too."
By 12, Brennan was getting snappy. She had made three interns cry and almost yelled at Cam twice.
"Bren?" Angela said. Brennan was on the forensic platform.
"Yes Angela?" Brennan said, trying to keep her tone calm, but she hated feeling out of control, like she did today, and so tried to maintain control. However this almost always resulted in her getting angry and mad over nothing.
"Do you want to go and get some lunch?"
"I'm not hungry."
"Bren please. I'm worried." Angela pleaded. She knew Booth was in meetings all day. He had called her and asked her to keep an eye on Brennan.
"Why? I'm fine. Just like I keep telling everyone." Brennan stormed of the forensic platform and went into her office. Angela got out her phone.
"This is Seeley Booth. Leave a message and I'll get back to you."
"Booth. It's Angela. As soon as your meetings are finished you need to get over here. She's... well I don't know. Just please come over." Angela sighed, knowing that the next three hours were going to be some of the longest of her life.
Inside her office Brennan had locked the door and was curled up on the sofa.
"I wish you were here Booth." She whispered to herself. She didn't blame him. She knew that he had meetings and that it wasn't his fault, but it didn't stop her needing him. Needing to feel his arms around her, needing to hear his voice, needing him. She heard a knock on the door and a note was slipped under the door.
'Sweetie, I know you need time but if you want to talk I'm here. If you want to stay at mine tonight you can. But I know you need Booth and that's good. He loves you Bren. He'll be here in a couple hours. There's some food outside which I think you should eat or Booth'll go all alpha-male on you and I don't think you can be bothered with that today. Please Sweetie. Ange.'
Brennan read the letter and tears came to her eyes. She unlocked the door and took the food. She locked the door again instantly and couldn't see Angela's face having a little smile on it as she saw Brennan take the food.
"Only you Booth. Only you." Brennan whispered to herself as she started to eat. She couldn't stomach much but at least if she ate a bit, Booth wouldn't lecture her as he so often did when she failed to eat. She could only eat about half of it and when she had finished she curled back up on the sofa again and fell into a fitful sleep.
At 3:27pm Brennan awoke with a jolt. Someone was banging on her door.
"Bones. Let me in."
"Booth." She sighed. She unlocked the door and immediately crushed herself to him. Booth wrapped one arm around her waist as she shut the door.
"Baby. Talk to me."
"I don't know why I'm so upset." Brennan said through tears. "It's been four years. But I can't help it."
"I know Bones. But you're OK. We're OK. I love you so much baby." Booth sat them down on the couch, Brennan on his lap, her head in the crook of his neck.
"I want to show you something." Brennan got up and got a piece of paper out, which was neatly tucked under her computer screen. "They have the original but they copied it for me. I'm not sure why I took it, but it seemed important. Angela has read Hodgins' and when we decided to take this step, I promised myself I would let you see mine." She handed it to him. Booth took a look at the first line and knew what it was.
"Bones I don't have to read it if you don't want me to."
"It's OK. I want you too." Booth pulled Brennan down on his lap and tightened his arm around her as he started to read.
Dear Booth.
The Gravedigger has Hodgins and I and we're about to try and blow our way out of here. I know you didn't give up and I know you did everything you could. Know that I tried very hard to get back to you. Know I couldn't have lasted this long without you. Know that I'm close to being in love with you. I know that's not as much as being in love with you, but I'm sure you understand how hard it is for me to realise that. I love you and I'm falling in love with you. I never thought I would say or write that. Know that my last thoughts are of you. My money and items are labelled in my will. Please use some of it for Parker. It's going to you . You are my family Booth.
Love Bones.
Booth had tears in his eyes by the time he had finished.
"Parker?" Booth managed to say.
"He's important to you." Brennan choked out. They both sat there holding each other crying.
"I love you so much Bones."
"I love you too Booth. My will hasn't changed you know. "
"Bones. Baby. What about Russ?"
"You've been my constant Booth. I knew you wouldn't leave me. Parker is equally as important to me as Russ is. I know it sounds stupid but I love Parker. He's a great kid and I love our weekends with him."
"Our?"
"Sorry it just slipped out. I know-" Brennan said, regretting it.
"Don't be sorry. Our weekends with him." Booth said.
"Ours." Brennan affirmed.
"I'm so honoured to be part of your life. Wait. What about your dad?"
"I love him, don't get me wrong. But he left me. I know it was for our 'safety'. But he still left me. He got my mother killed. He made you have to arrest him, which I know killed you inside. By definition I wanted to get him out of jail so technically he made you tell a court that I could have killed Kirby. I know you didn't like that."
"It sounds as though you don't want him in your will because he hurt me."
"Yes. That's correct."
"But I shouldn't determine your relationship with your father. If you want to be with him or anything, I shouldn't be able to influence your decision."
"You do. But it's because I want you too. You don't get it Booth. You are the single most important thing in my life and a couple of years ago that would have scared me, but you made me be OK to say it. You changed me Booth. You made me better."
"You were already perfect Bones." Brennan touched her lips to his. Nothing steamy, passionate or erotic. But a kiss which showed their true feelings for each other.