12. Darkness
"Thirteen…fourteen…fifteen…sixteen," Anna recited under her breath, trying to see how many fence posts she could count before her eyes began watering from a lack of blinking and she had to shut them, causing her field of vision to change from the snowy Japan countryside to the dark view of the backs of her eyelids.
"Twenty-seven," she hurriedly muttered and filed away in her mind before clenching her eyes shut, submerging her sight into darkness.
"…And I expect you to be on your best behavior as the entire Asakura extended family will be there to observe you and thus critique my selection of pupil and wisdom in choosing a fiancée for Yoh…" Kino droned on, oblivious to the fact that Anna was trying her very best to ignore her.
She blinked, opening her eyes that were still tearing up and began her inane yet obsessively compulsive game she was playing with herself. Or rather, against myself, Anna thought, preparing to count yet again. This time, I'll count electrical wire towers.
"You…you…my headphones…look at them, they're nothing but a mess of broken plastic and electrical wires now." His genuinely saddened eyes looked at her accusingly.
Anna clutched at her knees. No. Stop it. Calm yourself. We're at the second to last stop before Izumo…and Yoh's house. Stupid New Years. Stupid everything. She tried blocking the image out of her head but it backfired and Anna found herself wondering if this was how Yoh had felt on his own train ride to Osorezan when he had traveled to see her. Calm down, she ordered her mind, starting to count again in an attempt to keep herself distracted from thinking of Yoh. Calm down.
"One."
"Calm down, Anna. Come on, you can do it," Yoh said pleadingly as she collapsed down onto the ground, beginning to reign in the demon she had unleashed. He sprinted over to her as she splayed out onto the frost crusted dirt, looking panicked and pained as he cradled her in his arms and then—
"Two."
"Does she…does she hate me? W-What did I do to her…I really hope she doesn't hate me…" a half-neurotic Yoh said out loud on the street after Anna had passed him and threatened to kill the boy. Anna stood silently around the corner, her back pressed against the wall of the building, listening to him anxiously muse to himself—
"Three."
She wanted to scream for him. She wanted to yell at him to run away, to leave her, to save himself from this huge monster she had created. It wasn't his fault. It wasn't his battle. But yet, as she stilled her stirrings, he kept fighting and fighting and fighting. For her. To help her. But why, she didn't understand, why would he do that for her—
"Four."
"What is she doing?" Yoh asked in wonder as Awayaringo crooned and shrieked away on the television. "She looks like something out of my nightmares," he laughed teasingly. After seeing the look at Anna's face, he broke out into a grin. "Ah, come on, I was only joking." He stretched back and put his hands behind his head—
"Five."
"I could never forget you," he said brightly. "You're my fiancée after all!" he exclaimed as if trying to push her buttons, knowing full well that she didn't like it when he used that word. "And don't you ever forget that! Okay? Okay!" He brought his hand up, pausing as it passed hers almost as if he was about to half-consciously hold her hand. But at the last second, he jerked his hand up and shoved it into his jacket pocket—
"Six."
"Anna, I'm not…" Yoh hesitated, still facing the shut door behind which Anna was curled up into a ball, angry at herself. She breathed slowly, willing herself to not cry. She could already imagine him standing up and exiting the room, leaving her by herself. But then she heard his voice again. "I'm not going to leave you."
"Seven."
"Dear Anna," she could practically hear him speaking the words in his usual happy voice as she read his letter. "Training's been boring as usual. So is school and chores and everything that grandpa says. Actually, everything's been boring ever since I came back to Izumo. I hope you can visit soon." She gave a small laugh as she saw how many times he had written, crossed out, and rewritten 'Love, Yoh' at the bottom of the paper—
"Eight."
"Let's go to the temple, okay? And then you can go and pray to the gods there and maybe they can help you. It won't be that bad, it can even be fun if you let it be fun. Come on, Anna—" He stepped back from the door he had been talking to as she came out of her room. He blinked rapidly as if trying to get his eyes accustomed to the sight of Anna in a yukata, his mouth slightly hanging open—
"Nine."
"I believe in you," he said suddenly out of the blue. "I believe in you even if no one else does." He flashed her a thumbs up and she was left to wonder what had gotten into him to say that so unexpectedly. His regular cheery grin changed into a small, thoughtful smile as he lowered his hand and turned around and walked away from her. "Even if you don't believe in yourself," he said quietly—
"Ten."
"Ah…um, hold on," he said, trying to tie a knot so that the bandanna stayed on her head securely. Her face burnt up as she was unaccustomed to someone being so physically close to her. "There." Oddly enough, when he stepped back, his face was bright red as well. "It l-looks good on you," he said, laughing nervously and scratching his head as—
"Eleven."
He stared at her from his seat on the train as she looked back at him from her own seat, the two of them facing each other. Several times, both had opened their mouths to speak but something didn't feel quite right. They decided instead to remain silent. They didn't need words to communicate with each other. And it wasn't awkward or uncomfortable. It was right, just right for them. Then they both smiled and suddenly, even if for just that one moment in time, everything was going right in the world—
The train lurched and she staggered back into consciousness, finding herself back in her seat next to the still talking Kino and her own eyes watery.
Though her eyes tearing up probably was more a result of the memories that her game had triggered than her lack of blinking.
She looked outside as they passed one final electrical wire tower as the train began slowing down and rolling into the Izumo station.
"Twelve."
And then she shut her eyes and plunged into darkness.
A/N: what. the. eff. I swear to god, when I opened this word document, I was going to type up an outline for my psychology test. and then this thing comes along and writes itself and next thing I know I have nearly three pages of Our Story on what was once a clean, pristine word document. strange. anyways, i hope you enjoyed it! if you weren't clear on it, Kino and Anna are on their way to the Asakura residence in Izumo for a New Years party.
Please leave a review! I'd like to know what you thought :) and don't worry, next chapter Yoh and Anna are reunited! awkwardly. but still! :) and check out my new story Testimonies and this: www . shatteredlyre . livejournal . com
Happy days, beautiful people!