CHAPTER THIRTEEN

I wear this mask because...you can't handle me

The memorial was finished in relative peace. Jon decided not to press charges thanks to the intervention and a few well place looks from me. On flight home, I looked at every person, looking for those eyes. I finally decided that it must have coincidence. I mean, why would Crane go all the way to Seattle for a person he barely knew? And since he seemed so proud of the new me at Arkham, I doubt he would stop me from hurting someone.

I thought about going home, but there was nothing there for me, maybe painful memories and more unanswered voicemails. I didn't want to be alone, so I checked into a downtown and very crowded hotel. It was expensive as hell, but the more people, the safer I was plus it had a bar.

I headed down and grabbed an open seat. I ordered a drink and noticed something odd. There was a silence, a tension to the room and almost everyone was staring at me at one point or another, more specifically my scars. I reached up and rubbed them self consciously. Not that much scar tissue but I could feel the indent that his blade once made. As the stares became more intense, I couldn't help it to leave but I still didn't want to be alone. I needed something to cover them. I didn't want anyone recognizing me.

I went through all the makeup I had, which wasn't much and found nothing. So I started walking down the main stretch looking for something I could get to help me when I saw a small Theatrical store nestled back into a corner. I headed in and searched for good wax putty and bought as much of it as they had. I would be using it for the rest of my life, might as well buy the good stuff while I can. I also picked up a tube of hair color, gone with the blonde and to the other end of the spectrum, black. My natural color was close enough, but I didn't have time for that to grow in. I paid and hurried back to my room. The sun was quickly setting and I wanted to try my new experiment.

After about an hour of messing with the gooey putty, I finally got my scars covered and blended to where I finally looked normal. It made me cry, the thought that I could never have this again, never just be. I finished messing with my hair, black actually suited me and it would make it harder for anyone to find me. J was expecting a blonde, so who would he send his goons looking for. I did a once over and headed back down.

I ordered my drink again but this time, I was normal, no one noticed me, no one questioned me. So I downed the drinks, drowned my sorrow, which wasn't working at all. After about an hour of people watching, a man sat next to me. Not too hansom, but a certain charm. He introduced himself, something I really didn't want to get into.

"Um, Hi, I'm Guy, Guy Kopski. Can I get you another drink or something to eat perhaps?" He asked sweetly. He was definitely awkward, but it was in a cute innocence kind of way.

"I'm Harley." I said curtly.

"Well, Harley, you have the most beautiful blue eyes."

"So I have been told." I said after another sip.

"Harley, Harley, you aren't the same Harley…"

Damn it, couldn't I get a break. Why? I just wanted to hide, why did everyone have to know. The goddamn media, it's all their fault, I am so done.

"…that wrote that amazing thesis about violence in women and the psychological causes? I particularly love the section about the female motives, amazing that most is driven by love."

"Uh, thanks, I, yea that was me." He took me completely off guard, I warmed up to him. "Are you a psychologist?" I asked. He laughed politely.

"Nah, I am actually still in medical school, I did want to be a surgeon, but after reading some of your work, I may be persuaded to switch. I had seen your picture and expected a blonde, but it's not a bad change." Another awkward laugh and a pause.

"Well, an honor to meet you Harley, I'll let you get back to your peace and quiet. He smiled and started to walk away. I grabbed his shirt and pulled him back down. He stared blankly at me.

Maybe it was because of the booze or because I had nothing to lose, I pulled him into a deep embrace, and we began to kiss and didn't stop. All the cards were on the table and I did something that I would have never done otherwise. I took him to my hotel room and we slept together.

The following days, we spent a lot of time together, pretty much ignoring what happened the night before. It was odd, I actually had feelings for him, it may have even been love and he seemed to act the same around me. My life finally started to fall back into place. I was happy, I found a great guy and he was one of the nicest people I had ever met.

With my new found happiness, I moved back home and began a serious relationship. I was working at Arkham again, restriction some-what lifted. The Joker had left town, as the word on the street said.

Guy still didn't know about the scars, but it could wait. Tonight he was taking me out to one of the classiest restaurants in town. Apparently he was born into money but he didn't act like it, he was completely average in every way, which was okay, I guess. He didn't really seem to have any surprise elements to him, but I guess I did need the stability right now.

"Harley, I...I have something to talk to you about." He wouldn't look me in the eyes. "It's, It's been about a month now, and short by some standards, but our relationship is so real and it's the most I have felt for anyone, ever." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small black box. "Will you marry me?" He asked down on one knee.

I had nothing to say, I was in shock as my mouth dropped. Where did this come from? I mean, I thought I loved him, but how much? I looked him square in the face and I could see the emotion, the passion and I knew he was serious. I knew he would go to the end of the Earth for me and that we could be together.

"Yes. I will." I smiled and he ran over and swooped me up and kissed me as hard as he ever had. He slipped the ring on my finger and only then did I realize how large it was. This was unbelievable, I was getting married, I started to cry, not from the happiness, but because I had no one to share this with, no one to come to my wedding. But that I can worry about later, now I had a fiancé to worry about. He bent in, kissed my hand and said "First my heart then my soul." He was crying too.

After a standing ovation from the restaurant and a toast from Bruce Wanye, a very drunk Bruce Wayne, but Bruce Wayne none the less, we finished our meal and Guy dropped me off.

"Guy, I want you to come over to diner tomorrow, I have something special planned." I giggled out, I was still laughing from dinner, I guess it was some sort of emotional high.

"I'll be over at 8." He smiled.

"Drinks are at 7:30." He laughed.

"7:30 it is. Oh, and I wanted to give these to you, it's a copy of my apartment keys, it big enough for three or four, so you better start packing now."

"Oh, thanks, I would give you a copy of mine but I don't have any extras made, I'll have to do that soon." We both smiled and kissed each other goodnight.

I actually did have a copy, one that I got from Red's place. I had painted it for her, small little leaves painted on a central vine. No, I wouldn't be giving that one up.

I flopped down on my bed, staring at my ring and giggling.