School starts tomorrow! AAAHHHHH! That is all for this AN.

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Ch. 9 - Pleading

This morning it wasn't Lisbon's alarm that woke her up, but the pounding in her head. The sun light wasn't helping either. Lisbon wanted desperately to close the blinds, but she was convinced if she moved too much her head would explode. So she settled for throwing the covers over her head. But she couldn't get back to sleep, as hard as she tried.

Realization struck her, and she forced herself to sit up. What exactly happened last night? She remembered going clubbing with Pat. Dancing, heavy bass, flashing lights from the club, downing shots without much thought. She vaguely remembered riding in a taxi. But after that, it was blank. And she was still dressed in the clothes she was wearing that night. 'Surely I would have at least changed into something more comfortable.'

The clanking of dishes and the smell of pancakes shook her out of her thoughts of the previous night. 'Oh god, I brought someone home with me.' Lisbon just did not want to deal with some stranger in her house right now. She didn't want to think about what they might have done together, especially after San Francisco. She hugged her knees, feeling even dirtier than she already had, regretting she decided to go clubbing at all.

After gathering her thoughts, and dressing more comfortably, she headed into the kitchen to politely ask if the stranger would leave. But as she turned the corner, she saw the familiar blond curls of her consultant. She stopped in her tracks, now even more confused than she already was.

Jane turned around.

"Good morning sleepy head." Something was off. He didn't smile that 100 watt smile she felt he would have otherwise shot her.

"Um, good morning. Making breakfast?"

"Yup, blueberry pancakes will perk anyone up."

Lisbon sat at her table, and Jane handed her a plate full of pancakes, already buttered, and a small pitcher with heated syrup.

"Thank you."

She slowly nibbled at the pancakes, still wondering what happened, but too afraid to ask. Jane grabbed himself a plate and sat in front of Lisbon.

"Look, Lisbon. We need to talk."

Lisbon's heart skipped a beat. 'Oh god, what did I do? What the hell happened last night?!'

"Um, okay. But can I eat breakfast and shower first? This hangover's killing me." She really just needed more time. More time to possibly find anymore memories to figure things out.

Jane just sighed.

"Alright."

The rest of the meal was spent in complete silence. Jane occasionally glanced over at a frantic looking Lisbon. He figured she might not remember everything from that night.

Once Lisbon finished, she just got up and headed straight for the bathroom. She checked herself in the mirror as she waited for the water to heat up. Her eyes were bloodshot. Way more bloodshot than she had expected them to be.

The shower proved to be of little help in jogging Lisbon's memory. She headed back to her room, taking as long as possible to get dressed before finally joining Jane in the living room. He patted the vacant spot on her couch, inviting her to sit with him. The look he gave her made her feel like a little kid again. Like she was about to get a very serious talk about something she did wrong. She couldn't bring herself to look back into his eyes.

"Just to calm your nerves a bit, I slept on your couch. I only went into your room to put you to bed."

Lisbon seemed to calm down a bit at that, but she was still confused about what they needed to talk about.

"I also wanted to thank you, for getting Boris to drop the charges."

She finally looked at him. She tugged a light smile and nodded.

"You're welcome."

Jane sighed and tugged at his ear, trying desperately to find the right words.

"Don't take this the wrong way. I'm grateful for you helping, but... I just... I need to know what you did to get me out of trouble."

Lisbon's face stiffened as she tried to put up her emotional shield.

"Usually you can figure this stuff out on your own. Why do you need me to tell you?" She could taste the bitterness in her words.

"I could. But I want to hear it from you. Whatever you did really upset you. And, I'm worried."

"I... I don't want to talk about it."

"Teresa..."

"I said no, Jane!"

Jane closed his eyes and dropped his head. It dawned on Lisbon that he knew exactly what she did.

Silence fell over the room. And just as Lisbon was about to get up to lock herself in her room, Jane grabbed her shoulders. He gripped her so tightly that she flinched. But he just looked into her eyes with a frenzied look.

"Why?" Was all he could muster.

Tears welled up in her eyes. Memories of that night kept bombarding her brain, tormenting her even further. Her quivering lips made it difficult to speak, and somehow one tear managed to escape her eye.

"I... I was afraid. You could've ended up in jail. Sasha probably would've forced you to leave... And I know how important catching Red John is to you. I couldn't just let that bastard take all that away from you!"

Jane finally loosened his grip when he felt Lisbon's whole body shake at this confession. He could only stare at Lisbon in shock and realization that not only had his behavior caused pain for his family, but also for Teresa Lisbon. The people he loved most, all suffered because of him. And he had had enough of it.

He let go of Lisbon entirely.

"You don't deserve that, Teresa. You deserve so much better. I'm sorry."

He got up and gathered his coat and vest and walked towards the door.

"Patrick, wait!"

Lisbon was frantic. She knew if he left now, she might not ever see him again. She jolted from the couch and grabbed his arm just as he had opened the door.

They looked at each other for what seemed like an eternity. Both with pleading looks. His pleading to just let him go. Hers pleading him to stay. Neither one baking down.

"Please... Please stay, Patrick."