"Do you think Mrs. Weasley will come to school?" Elizabeth sat across from her father that evening, having supper in their quarters.
"I think she made her point," Severus said blandly. "I would imagine your friend will face additional penalties during the next holiday."
"You'd never send me one of those, would you? It was embarrassing."
Severus smirked. "One of the pleasures of teaching at the school my daughter matriculates is that if I wish to scold you, I can do it in person at any time." He raised an eyebrow. "And I have the ability to impose 'additional penalties' right here."
"What do you think she'll do? She sounded really mad," Elizabeth poked her food.
"I wouldn't presume to know Arthur and Molly's domestic routine, and you should be more concerned with your own consequences. All the desks in the Potions classroom need to be scrubbed in preparation for my classes tomorrow."
Elizabeth changed the subject.
"Tomorrow I have Lockhart."
"Professor Lockhart," Severus corrected.
"Can't I do Defense with you like last year?"
Severus frowned. "Last year was under extenuating circumstances. You need to be in class with your peers unless there is a safety reason for you to be removed."
"What if he does what he did at the bookstore?"
"That was a misguided attempt at a press spectacle. There won't be any reporters in the classroom."
*S*S*
Elizabeth tried to convince herself that Severus was right, but the next day on the way to Herbology, his judgment was called into question.
"Elizabeth! Ronald! I've been wanting a word!" Lockhart swept the two children away from the group on the way to the greenhouse. "Elizabeth. Elizabeth. Elizabeth."
Elizabeth and Ron looked at each other.
"When I heard— well, of course, it was my fault. Could have kicked myself."
Elizabeth shrugged at Ron's look.
"Don't know when I've been more shocked. Flying a car to Hogwarts! Well, of course, I knew at once why you'd done it. Stood out a mile. Elizabeth, Elizabeth, Elizabeth."
Elizabeth felt like there were insects crawling on her skin.
"Gave you the bug. You got on the front page with me and you just couldn't get enough."
"Oh, no, Professor," Ron tried to interrupt.
"Ronald, Ronald, Ronald. I understand. Natural to want a bit of fame. But see here, young man, you can't start flying cars to try and get yourself noticed." He flashed his shiny smile. "Elizabeth here has a few people who know about her. You know, this business with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named."
Elizabeth fought not to roll her eyes.
"It's not quite as much notoriety as I have, but it's a start. You might want to tone it down a little, Elizabeth."
Elizabeth was irritated and looked at Ron, expecting to see the same sentiment in Ron's eyes and she saw something else. Sadness? She grabbed his arm. "We have to go to class, Professor."
She dragged Ron into the greenhouse, where she was presented with a pair of earmuffs. "Mandrake, or Mandragora, is a powerful restorative," Hermione was saying. "It's used to return people who have been transfigured or cursed to their original state."
Elizabeth looked at Ron, who had pushed into the group a few people away and was diligently watching Professor Sprout and Hermione, who were engaged in a verbal Mandrake ping-pong match, the older witch firing questions and the younger witch answering them.
"Earmuffs on," Professor Sprout ordered, and Elizabeth snapped hers on, looking away from Ron, still puzzling over his reaction to Lockhart.
*S*S*
Lunchtime came, and Ron's mood had gotten darker. Between the broken wand and whatever had upset him in their conversation with the professor, he was mumbling to himself every few minutes.
"We've got Defense this afternoon," Hermione said excitedly, after they'd gobbled lunch to go outside.
Elizabeth shuddered. "Great."
"Elizabeth, sometimes I think you're not even a girl," Hermione rolled her eyes. "Don't you fancy him?"
"No," Elizabeth said shortly. She turned away to grab her schedule out of her bag and came face to face with a Muggle camera, held by a small boy she'd never seen before.
"All right, Elizabeth? I'm— I'm Colin Creevy," Elizabeth inched away a little. "I'm in Gryffindor, too. D'you think, I mean, would it be all right if… Can I have a picture?" he asked eagerly.
"A picture?" Elizabeth repeated.
"So I can prove I met you," Colin explained. "Maybe someone else could take it and I could stand next to you, and you could sign it."
"Signed photos? You're giving out signed photos, Evans?" Draco's voice sneered from behind them.
"Shut up, Malfoy," Elizabeth muttered.
Malfoy pretended to look around. "Why? I don't see Daddy here to save you."
"Don't be an ass," Elizabeth shot back. "Oh wait, too late."
"Weasley would like a signed photo, Evans," Malfoy went on as if she hadn't spoken. "It'd be worth more than his family's whole house."
"What's all this?" Lockhart was coming toward them. "Who's giving out signed photos?" He strode over to Elizabeth and threw an arm around her shoulders. "Never mind, I know who." He shooed the other students away.
"A word to the wise, Elizabeth," Lockhart pinned her to his side and started back toward the castle. "Handing out signed pictures at this stage of your career isn't sensible. It looks a tad bigheaded. There may well come a time when, like me, you'll need to keep a stack handy wherever you go, but I don't think you're quite there yet." He laughed and dragged her with him into the classroom where he finally released her.
Sinking into the seat as far from Lockhart as possible, she piled her books in front of her, trying to block the wizard's face. She put her face in her hands and tried to ignore as much of the beginning of class as possible.
"I see you've all bought a complete set of my books," Lockhart said once they were all seated. "I thought we'd start today with a little quiz, just to see how well you've read them." He passed the papers down the rows. "You have thirty minutes, starting… now!"
Elizabeth had not read them. Severus had made her spend an hour a day after they'd gone to Diagon Alley reading her new books, but she'd put off Lockhart's. She'd read Potions more than once, unwilling to not know an answer in Snape's class, and she'd read Transfiguration carefully as well. But Lockhart's books sat untouched.
When Severus asked, she just said that she wasn't finished with the others, and if he thought that was strange he didn't let on.
Elizabeth looked at the test.
What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color?
What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?
On and on, over three sides of paper. Elizabeth had no idea about any of the answers.
After the test, Lockhart looked critically at the papers, praising Hermione for getting all the answers correct. When he reached Elizabeth paper, he clicked his tongue. "Tut, Tut," He looked disappointed. "You don't get to be famous by being lazy, my girl."
Elizabeth half hoped that he would berate someone else for scoring badly, but the Professor turned, dropping the tests on the desk and reaching behind his chair to pull out a large cage.
"Cornish Pixies," he said brightly. Elizabeth looked at the cage warily, not at all sure what was coming next. "Let's see what you make of them," he opened the cage with a florish.
Had Elizabeth been able to think, she might have made a mental note never to ask for a pixie for Christmas. Or she might have thought that she was glad that back garden at Spinner's End was infested with gnomes and not pixies.
But there was no time to think as the pixies proceeded to cause havoc on the classroom and the students. One knocked Elizabeth's ink bottle all over Ron's books, while another happily shredded Hermione's spare roll of parchment.
"Come on now— round them up, round them up, they're only pixies!" Lockhart rolled up his sleeves, waved his wand, and shouted, "Peskipiksi Pesternomi!"
Again, if it was possible to think, Elizabeth not only would have wished that the spell had worked, she also would have wondered why it didn't. Lockhart apparently did wonder why it didn't work, and dived under his desk.
The bell rang, and the students leapt up, rushing out the door. Hermione, Ron, and Elizabeth almost made it to safety when Lockhart pushed past them and said, "Well, I'll ask you three to just nip the rest of them back into their cage." And then he was gone.
*S*S*
Once they discovered that the secret was freezing the pixies midair, it was just a matter of firing the spell at each one of them. After Ron managed to freeze himself with his own wand, Hermione and Elizabeth finished up on their own before unfreezing him.
"You could have done that right after it happened, you know," he grumbled.
"We didn't want to risk it," Hermione said lightly. "Come on, it's time for dinner."
They stopped by the tower to drop off their things, and then headed to the Great Hall. Ron was still whining about how his muscles hurt from being frozen for so long, and Hermione offered to refreeze him so he would stop talking.
Collapsing into seats at the Gryffindor table, Ron piled his plate with food. "Catching pixies is hungry work."
"How many pixies did you catch, Ronald?" Hermione levitated a potato on to her plate.
Elizabeth filled her glass with pumpkin juice. It didn't take long for an emerald envelope to appear beside her plate. She shot a look at her father, who raised an eyebrow.
She opened the envelope and unfolded the cream stationary.
Elizabeth-
I've had an interesting conversation with Professor Lockhart this afternoon. I would like an explanation at your detention this evening.
-SS
*S*S*
"Hi, Dad." Elizabeth closed the portrait behind her.
"Hello," Severus was sitting behind his desk. "Have a seat."
"Dad, it wasn't my fault."
"Really? And just who is to blame for your abominable score on today's Defense exam?'
Elizabeth squirmed. "It wasn't over the right stuff."
"The right stuff?" Severus asked incredulously. "Do I hear you correctly? You are blaming the assessment itself?" He shook his head. "I thought I had imposed enough study time this summer, but I was clearly mistaken."
"Dad! The questions weren't even about Defense! They were all about Lockhart—
"Professor Lockhart," Severus corrected, "And you would do well to watch your tone, young lady."
Elizabeth clenched her teeth. "It was a stupid test."
Severus sighed and went to the floo. Fire calling Lockhart, he requested Elizabeth's test.
"What a good role model you are, Severus! Make sure her brush with fame doesn't go to her head."
Severus gritted his teeth. Of all classes, why did she have to get into trouble in this one? His skin crawled at being on Lockhart's side. He stepped through the floo to retrieve the paper, and then came back to find Elizabeth in exactly the same position, but there was a hopeful look on her face.
Severus wondered at this. The girl should feel like she was most certainly in trouble now that he had the test, and yet she looked relieved. He looked at the exam, grimacing at the large red zero at the top of the paper. His eyes drifted down over the questions.
Elizabeth watched as his face turned from stern-father to disbelief to irritation.
"I told you it wasn't about Defense stuff," she said quietly.
"Tell me that this is some sort of elaborate joke," Severus held up the paper.
"Today in class we spent 30 minutes doing that and the rest of the class chasing Cornish Pixies."
Severus grimaced. "Go do your homework."
"What about my detention?"
Severus straightened his shirt cuffs. "Finish your Potions essay and I'll check it when I return."
"Where are you going?"
"I need to speak to your grandfather. I'll be back soon."
"Can I come?"
Severus shook his head. "Stay here, do your homework." He strode to the portrait and went out, leaving her to "finish" her essay.
*S*S*
Severus arrived in Dumbledore's office with the test in hand.
"Severus! Come in," Albus called from his desk.
"Father, have you gone batty in your old age?"
Albus shrugged serenely and popped a lemon drop in his mouth. "To what are you referring, my boy?"
"What possessed you to hire that spotlight-seeking showoff?"
"That's quite alliterative, Severus. Which hireling are we talking about?"
"You know very well whom I'm talking about. Look at this test your new Defense professor gave his second year class." Severus tossed the parchment on Dumbledore's desk.
"Severus, I can't do anything about your daughter's grades, you know that."
"Bugger the mark, father, look at the questions."
"He appears to be checking that the students read carefully over the summer, Severus. It appears that Elizabeth did not read carefully."
"He's using the class as an ego boost," Severus spat.
"Ask me the question you really want to, son." Albus said quietly.
"I've been begging for this job for years. Are you trying to hire everyone on Earth before you hire me?"
Albus smiled. "Severus, you are a brilliantly talented Potions Master. And of course your second life doesn't make you an ideal Defense candidate."
"Of course it does!" Severus all but shouted. "Who better than I to arm the students against the Dark Arts than someone who has witnessed them first hand?"
"By that logic, I should hire Lucius Malfoy," Albus said blithely.
Severus scowled. "Don't be ridiculous."
"Severus, you should go encourage your daughter to study." With that, Albus returned to whatever it was he was working on before Severus had appeared. Knowing when he was dismissed, Severus, still fuming, returned to the dungeons.
*S*S*
Elizabeth Evans
Year 2
Swelling Solution
Swelling solution causes whatever touches it to get bigger. How big depends on how much solution you put on the object.
To make swelling solution, you need to simmer puffer-fish eyes in a solution of salt water until the mixture has reduced to a syrup-like texture. Then, squeeze the ink of 6 slugs into the mixture and immediately remove the cauldron from the heat.
To make the swelling go down, you have to use Deflating draught. Deflating draught is made with mandrakes.
Swelling Solution can be used for lots of things, including making fruits and vegetables bigger. But you have to wash the fruit really well before you eat it, or your tongue will swell up, and you don't be able to breathe. Deflating Draught takes 6 days to brew, so you should always have some on hand just in case.
Swelling Solution takes only an hour to brew, but you shouldn't keep a store of it because it looks like a lot of other potions and it could be confused if you didn't label it right.
The End
"At least the spelling is correct," Severus said, picking up his quill and dipping it in green ink. "Your facts are incomplete and undocumented, the whole thing is unorganized, and it if this is 2 feet, then I'm a Gryffindor." He marked furiously before handing the parchment back to her. "Try again."
"I didn't have time to go to the library." Elizabeth took the parchment dejectedly.
"Any Potions book that can be found in the library can be found in my office," Severus gestured to the door. "Anything you can't reach easily is something you don't need."
"Can it wait until tomorrow?" Elizabeth yawned.
"No," Severus said. "And, by the way, 'the end' is unnecessary. It isn't a story."
Elizabeth groaned. "I can work on it tomorrow."
"Yes you can. You can write it tomorrow, after you complete your research tonight," he pointed to the door again. "Gather your materials."
"Slave driver," she muttered, going into the office.
"Keep it up, my girl, and you can spend the weekend studying."
Elizabeth dejectedly went into the office and grabbed a few promising books. Back in the residence, she collapsed with them on the sofa. Severus raised his eyebrows, but didn't look up. "My, it's a wonder that the Gryffindor common room isn't full of broken furniture."
Elizabeth stuck out her tongue at his bowed head and went to work, glancing up every few minutes. How does he stay so focused? She wondered, looking at the meager amount of information that she had gathered.
"I don't get it," Elizabeth gave her voice just as much whine as her father would tolerate.
"You 'don't get' what?" Severus questioned, still marking.
"Any of it."
Severus quirked an eyebrow. "'I don't get it' is not a question, Elizabeth. I will certainly answer any questions you might have."
She blew air out of her mouth, blowing her bangs out from her forehead. "Fine."
"I'm sorry, was there a question mark at the end of that?" Severus stopped marking, but didn't put down his quill.
"It's swelling solution! It makes stuff bigger! Who cares?"
"Is the question 'who cares'?" Severus asked softly, rolling his quill between his fingers, "Because swelling solution has several practical uses that you could extract from the literature and include in your report."
Elizabeth dug her toe into the rug. "I don't care," she mumbled.
Severus set his quill purposefully in its stand. "Come here."
Elizabeth eyed him, suddenly wary. "Why?"
"Because I am your father and I told you to come here." Severus pushed his chair back from the desk as she made her way to him. When she was at his side, he pulled a vial out of his desk along with a slide. He handed the second object to his daughter. "Spit on that."
She raised an eyebrow in a perfect imitation of the Potions professor, but did as she was told. Taking back the slide, he set it on the desk and opened the bottle, extracting the solution with an eyedropper.
A few drops of the solution splashed onto the slide, and all of a sudden, the slide and a bit of the surrounding desk was covered with colorful blobs.
"Eww," Elizabeth scrunched up her nose.
"Indeed," Severus said. "However, bacterium and viruses are easier to work with in larger form. We only have the medical potions that we have because our researchers are able to examine the germs up close. We had swelling solution before Muggles had microscopes, and swelling solution is still better."
"Can you just use an engorgio spell?" Elizabeth eyed the bacteria.
"Engorgio works on individual items, like this," Severus pointed his wand at his quill. "Engorio" The quill grew in size.. "You need swelling solution if you want to enlarge a large number of things at the same time." He pointed his wand again. "Reducio." The quill went back to its normal size.
Elizabeth poked at the blobs with her wand. "So that's why you can give me a potion that makes me better faster?"
"Yes," Severus waved his wand to clean the slide and tucked the materials back into his desk. "So, if the question is 'who cares' then the answer is 'the entire wizarding world and a fair bit of the Muggle world."
Elizabeth wasn't sure how to respond to this bit of information. Luckily, a flash of white fur called their attention away from swelling solution by knocking all Severus' graded parchments off the desk.
"Blast it!" Severus pointed his wand, restoring the papers to their place before grabbing Casper by the scruff of his neck. "Take the powdered doughnut before it destroys everything." He handed her the cat. "Overgrown dandelion." He resumed his marking. "Get ready for bed while you're in there."
*S*S*
"Quidditch practice! Quidditch practice!" Elizabeth opened an eye much too early Saturday morning to see a glowing red ball on her bedside table. She swatted it on to the floor, but it continued to squawk.
Levering herself out of bed, she attempted to smother it with her pillow.
"Quidditch… Quidditch…" the globe mumbled from the fabric.
"What is going on in here?" Severus stood in the doorway, watching his daughter struggle with the orb.
"I don't know," Elizabeth said, irritated. She pulled her wand off the bedside table and pointed it at the pillow. "Silencio." She glared at the red ball. "Apparently, Oliver wants to have Quidditch practice."
Severus rolled his eyes and rubbed a hand over his face, returning to his bedroom with no comment.
Twenty minutes later, Elizabeth found the rest of the team in the changing room.
"It's the crack of dawn, Oliver!" She sank down between Katie and Fred, holding up her obnoxious glowing ball. "What the heck is this?"
Katie held up her own Quaffle-like alarm system, wrapped in Spell-o-tape. "I tried to strangle mine."
"It's better than Oliver jumping on your bed," George muttered. "Just be lucky that he couldn't get into the girls' dorm."
"Quit whining," Oliver was standing beside an oversized drawing of a Quidditch pitch. "Listen up. We should have won the cup last year. We were easily the best team. But due to circumstances beyond our control…" he looked at Elizabeth, who blushed, "Anyway, we have to train harder this year."
Oliver scribbled enthusiastically on the board. While his back was turned, Elizabeth leaned over to Fred. "I'm sorry."
He didn't respond.
She bit her lip. "Fred. I'm sorry."
"I'm trying to listen to Wood," Fred hissed. "I can be serious, you know."
"I know, and I didn't mean that you couldn't be serious," she whispered back. "You totally took it out of context. Besides, it's not like you're serious that often, so how was I supposed to know?"
"Evans! Are you listening?"
"Sure, Oliver," Elizabeth snapped her attention to the complicated board. "I'm going to look for the Snitch."
Oliver turned back to the board, and everyone was quiet for a while. George appeared to have fallen asleep, and Angelina was going that way.
"You are supposed to know because I've been serious around you," Fred finally whispered again.
"Like when?" Elizabeth asked out of the side of her mouth.
"Like the troll thing," Fred hissed.
"Okay, I'm sorry. You can be serious," Elizabeth whispered. "I'll never say you are fun ever again. Okay?"
Fred shrugged. "I'm fun sometimes."
Elizabeth giggled and elbowed him in the side. Before she could fully respond, Oliver rounded on them again.
"If you two are finished, let's put these plans into practice. If you were listening." He grabbed his broom and headed out onto the pitch, the rest of the team straggling behind.
"What is that clicking noise?" Fred looked around. Elizabeth looked around to see Colin, snapping his camera almost violently in the stands. "Who is that?" Fred asked.
"No idea," Elizabeth lied, diverting her eyes.
"He's a Slytherin spy," Wood said hotly, shaking his fist in Colin's direction. "Of all the low—
"I don't think he is," George said, looking behind Oliver.
"He definitely is!" Wood insisted. "Why else would someone be up this early?"
"Beats me," Angelina grumbled.
"Wood, he's not a spy," George repeated. "They don't need a spy. They're here." He pointed past Oliver.
"Flint!" Oliver bellowed, striding toward the other captain. "This is our practice time! We booked the pitch! I booked it!"
"Calm down, Wood, I've got a signed note here," Flint pulled out a piece of parchment and held it up, reading it like some kind of proclamation. "I, Professor S. Snape, give the Slytherin team permission to practice today on the Quidditch field owing to the need to train their new Seeker."
"You've got a new Seeker? Where?" Wood demanded, glaring alternately at Flint and Elizabeth, as if she was some how responsible for her father's note.
From behind the six robed Slytherin players, a smaller boy, smirking all over his pale, pointed face, made his appearance. It was Draco Malfoy.