The Way Home
Chapter 19
Disclaimer: see chapter 1
A/N: Okay, it's a two for one day, two chapters for the price of one. I'm nearing the end of my little story, only a couple more chapters to go and I'm angish to see what you guys think, so I'll probably post the last two chapters tomorrow. This has been another labor of love, Brotherhood style. You guys have been amazing, I appreciate the support, alerts, favorites and reviews, many have helped shape this story. I am grateful for those of you who took the time to read my little story even if you didn't review, the fact you guys were out there counted. Thanks for the support and hopefully we'll be concluding this little adventure tomorrow. Now on with the show!-Montez
"Are they asleep?" Jim asked as Caleb made his way into the kitchen. The younger man slowly walked over to the coffee maker pouring a cup before taking a seat with his father and the Pastor at the table.
"Yeah, didn't take much for Sammy now that his brother's back, Deuce kept fighting it though." Caleb pinched the bridge of his nose, his body and mind still tired for his ordeal.
"You all right Son?" Mac asked, reaching across the table, touching his son's wrist. Caleb hadn't missed how his father had seemed to increase the physical contact between them, whether a pat on the back, squeeze of his shoulder, or a light touch on his arm. The young psychic knew that what he had been through had terrified his father, especially when his heart had stopped, Caleb had felt the absolute fear his father had felt, even hours later when he had finally woken up in the hospital.
"Just tired." Caleb answered, looking between the two men, "So do you really think Johnny will be able to come home tomorrow?" John had arrived in Louisville two days ago and only today had Caleb and John been able to convince Dean he needed come back to the farm and rest.
Mac nodded as he took a sip of coffee, "He's just going to have to understand that he has to take it easy, he'll be in that cast at least six weeks, plus he needs to build his strength back up from the pneumonia."
"Good luck with that Dad." Caleb snorted. The younger man knew once John was out of the hospital, he would be chomping at the bit to get back into some type of routine, even though hunting was out until his arm was healed. Glancing at Jim Caleb added, "You'll have to play the Guardian card on him to get him to listen, you know that right?"
Jim stared at the dark liquid in his cup, "I think this time Dean may be the secret weapon in our arsenal for keeping Jonathon in line." Jim looked up at Caleb, "I believe Jonathon finally has some understanding of what his condition did to his son, he finally saw the shadow of the fear and loss the boy felt during the worst of what happened, even though Dean has been trying so hard to put on a brave front. You know yourself that Dean refused to leave his father's side until Jonathon swore to the boy that he was feeling better and would hopefully be home sometime tomorrow."
"We came close to losing them both didn't we?" Caleb watched how his friend had remained quieter than normal once Dean and John arrived in Louisville. The teen would engage in conversations if prompted, but he would rarely start them. The Psychic knew it was Dean's way of dealing and was again only able to offer his silent support for his little brother, waiting patiently until Dean reached out to him.
"We nearly lost all three of you my boy." Jim replied as he reached out and squeezed the younger man's hand, before standing to refresh is coffee.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Mac asked, he had been giving his son time to come to terms with what happened, hoping the younger man would offer some insight as to what he remembered.
Caleb ran his fingers over the numerous notches and scratches that covered the large table that sat in Jim's kitchen. For a moment his mind thought of the stories the table could tell if it could talk, the secrets and heartbreak the table had been witness to over the years. Over the last several days the young man had tried to understand another curve his abilities had thrown him, the fact he was able to appear in a solid form to John, when his body was in a hospital was something his mind was still trying to come to terms with. He didn't know if it was a one-time deal, or if would become something new he would have to learn to live with. However, his memories were clear concerning the experiences he had shared with his family, though he knew it was a totally different plane of consciousness he had been traveling between, one bridging the real world with John and the dream world with Mac and Dean.
Laying his hands flat on the table, his silver ring standing out against the dark grain Caleb took a deep breath. "I honestly don't know how to start." Looking up he only saw concern reflected back from the two men that had saved him all those years ago, that took him in and loved him as if he had always been a part of their family.
"What is the first thing you remember?" Jim's calming voice asked.
Folding his hands in front of him, Caleb started to twist the band that connected him to so many others. "I remember passing the sign coming into New Haven, then without warning a pain shooting through my head. Then the vision of John falling." Roughly rubbing his eye's Caleb tried to ride his mind of the image of his mentor tumbling helplessly down the embankment, "I just remember feeling useless as I saw him come to a stop, not moving…Next thing was waking up in the Jeep. Once everything started to click I knew I needed to make it here, so somebody could help John."
"I had just come back in from letting Dean know dinner was almost ready when he called for me to come back out. I had no idea what was going on when I stepped out on the porch and he kept staring toward the drive, as soon as you cleared the tree line and looked up, he knew it was you. I'm sorry to say it took me a second to even understand what Dean had yelled." Jim stood, taking his cup to the sink, turning to lean against the counter.
"I remember seeing Deuce, hearing him yell my name. I felt his fear when I collapsed, God I can't believe I put him through that." Caleb choked, he had never wanted to see his friend hurt or scared, especially if he was the cause. "I don't even remember telling you guys about the vision; everything went blank once I felt Deuce grab me." Caleb stood, needing to move as his own emotions were trying to take over the control he'd had on them. "Next thing I know I'm looking at Johnny laying in that ravine. Once I got him to Bobby's and felt Deuce there, I figured everything was okay, I don't remember anything else until I visited you Dad." Caleb had stopped his pacing, turning his attention to his father who had remained unusually quiet through out the conversation, normally Mac would be firing questions, trying to figure out the situation. "Dad?"
Mac had sat and listened to the exchange between Jim and Caleb, when he asked his son if he wanted to talk about what happened, the Scholar wasn't prepared for the emotions that surged through his being as the younger man recounted what he remembered. Seeing his Son unconscious had scared him like nothing in his life, but he recalled with clarity the visit Caleb made to him as he slept next to his Son's hospital bed. When Caleb had told him he was okay and everything would be over soon, Mac had felt a sense of hope, but what happened just a few short hours later had been affecting the older man's ability to allow his son out of his sight. "Dad?" Mac's tear-filled eye's met his Son's as Caleb knelt next to his father, touching his shoulder.
Clearing his throat, Mac rubbing his hand over his face, "I'm sorry…"
Caleb had not expected to see his father's gray eye's filled with tears, "Dad, what?"
Mac glanced up at Jim, the older man nodding as he quietly slipped from the room, the Guardian knew what Caleb's condition during his time in the hospital had done to Mac, Jim knew what fears his friend had been warring with, he knew that the father and son needed time to begin healing again.
Once Jim left the room, Mac moved his chair back some, turning so he was facing his Son. He reached his hand out and touched the side of the younger man's face. "I felt you with me in that dream, knew without doubt it was you. Your visit gave me hope that even though you hadn't woke up yet that everything was going to be okay. Then…" Mac choked.
Caleb's hand covered his father's, "I'm sorry Dad, if I could have controlled that I would have, I never wanted you to see something like that happen to me." Tear's were now pooling in Caleb's eyes at the heartbreaking pain his father was reliving as the older man remembered seeing the heart monitor attached to Caleb flat-line.
"It wasn't your fault, God don't ever think you caused that, we still don't know what caused it, we can only assume it was tied into what was happening with John, but…" Again the Scholar's voice cracked, a tear slipping free, "When your heart stopped…my world stopped."
Caleb knew his father loved him, though it had taken Caleb, himself, months to let the man before him into his own heart for fear of the rejection he had so often felt from the adult's that had passed through his young life. But once Mac adopted him, he never doubted Mac's feelings toward him, but this feeling was on a whole different level, it humbled Caleb to think someone loved him so much that they would feel their world crashing down around them if something happened to him. The young psychic knew if anything happened to his father, he didn't know if he would survive it, but to think Mac felt the same way.
Mac stared into the golden gaze that those seconds had threatened to take away forever, "I need you to understand, you are my life Caleb. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost you. That's why I worry so much, why I pushed you to have a balanced life between the real world and hunting, I can't bare the thought of John or Jim calling me to tell me something's happened to you, knowing I'm the one that brought you into all this."
Caleb reached behind him, pulling out one of the chairs next to his father, taking a seat, but never releasing his hold on the older man's hand. "You didn't bring me into this, I was apart of it long before we met, you brought me into a family that has cared for me, protected me. You've taught me that I wasn't the crazy freak I thought I was back then. You've taught me how to try and use my abilities to help those around me, and some how that is what they did this time. They allowed me to help Johnny and Dean, because if something happened to his dad, you know as well as I do we would have lost Deuce too." Caleb took a deep-breath, never breaking eye contact with his father, "I am sorry you had to see that, but I want you to know that I know how much you care about me, how much you love me and I am thankful everyday that I have you. I never want to do anything to hurt you, I love you Dad."
Mac's eyes were overflowing; he didn't even attempt to stop them as he pulled his Son to him. The pain and fear of nearly losing his Son would be with him forever, as would the constant worry for his safety that he had been carrying around since that first day he walked into that hospital room, ten years ago. But his son was here now, he was alive and safe, that's all Mac ever wanted, "I love you too, Son. I love you too."