Back In Boston

Jane was laying on her couch midafternoon, still in her pajamas. She had only been back home for a little over twenty-four hours.

She had called her ma when she flew out of Paris to pick her up when she landed and of course her ma had called Frankie, Izzy, Korsak and Frost when Jane refused to answer any of her questions about the abrupt trip back home. Up to this point Jane had effectively ignored and dodged everyone. That was until a relentless knocking sounded at her door.

"No one's home! Go away!" She yelled from the couch.

"C'mon Janie open the door!" She heard Frankie call back. "You can't keep ignoring everyone!"

Jane groaned loudly as she got up and flung the door open. "Why can't all of you leave me alone?" She remarked leaning against the doorframe.

"We care about you Janie."

Jane rubbed her face and walked into her kitchen, leaving the door open. She grabbed a beer from the fridge before hopping onto the counter. "Are you gonna come in or just stand out there all day?"

"Oh," Frankie said as he stepped inside.

"What's going on Jane? You're not answering any of our calls. Ma is worried sick."

"Ma is always worried. I lost my phone, and even if I hadn't, I still wouldn't answer. I just want to be left alone alright? Is that too much to ask for? I'm still on vacation so why don't you all just pretend I'm not here."

"C'mon Janie. Talk to me. You used to talk to me about everything. Why not talk to me now. What happened in Paris?"

"Nothing happened in Paris alright?! Leave it be Frankie, I don't want to talk about it….at all. Not with you, not with Frost, not with anyone! I just want to be left alone!" Jane said as she slammed her beer down on the counter too.

"Alright! Alright!" Frankie replied, holding his hands up. "Look, we don't have to talk. Let's just hang out. Let's go down to the park. Play some basketball and then after we can swing by that sandwich place you like and grab a beer while we're at it."

Jane thought it over for a moment. She knew this was just Frankie's way of letting her know he was here if she needed.

"Alright I'll take you up on that but no talking unless it's about sports, beer or food. Got it? First time you ask me again about Paris I'm out. Understood?"

"Understood."

"Good. I'll go get changed."

After playing a game of basketball Jane and Frankie headed to the sandwich shop.

Standing in line Jane couldn't decide on exactly what she wanted. She knew nothing here would ever taste as good as the food in Paris.

"Damn Janie, would you hurry up and pick something?" Frankie whined.

"Oh, put a sock in it Frankie. I'm the one paying, which really it should be you, since you lost the game by twenty points." Jane remarked with a laugh.

"Ha ha funny."

Later that evening Jane met Frankie at the Dirty Robber.

Walking in the door, she almost turned and walked right back out when she saw Izzy and Frost with Frankie.

Deciding it was inevitable that she couldn't avoid them forever she walked over and bump shoulders with Izzy.

"Hey," she said with a small smile.

"Wellll, it's about time. Frankie said you were supposed to be here an hour ago."

Jane shrugged, "Figured there was no need to rush. Frankie didn't tell me you two were coming when he mentioned getting a drink." She said eyeballing her brother.

"It's alright, come on, sit down. You've got some catching up to do." Izzy remarked, calling the server over for another round.

Having had four beers and three tequila shots Jane was starting to feel the effects but she was actually enjoying the night as she and the people closest to her laughed and carried on.

"So Jane, another shot?" Frost asked with a grin.

"I don't know Frost."

"Oh, come on Jane! Just one more, it's not like you have work tomorrow. Oh wait, unless you're scared?" Frost said, challenging Jane.

"Scared? Ha, I see you have jokes. Give me the damn shot Barlow." Jane snickered when Frost scoffed. He poured Jane another shot and handed her the glass.

"Here's to hopefully not waking up with a hangover." She said as she threw back the drink before slamming the shot glass upside down on the table.

"If this comes back to haunt me Frost, I'm gonna kick your ass."

Frankie laughed. "There would have to be an ass there to kick in the first place Janie."

"Wha, hey!" Frost said, offended.

Jane snorted, "And how would you know Frost doesn't have an ass Frankie?" She asked, raising an eyebrow at her brother.

"Well, I. Uh…."

Everyone at the table started laughing as Frankie stammered over his words.

"Relax little brother. I'm just messing with ya."

When the laughter began to die down Frost had to ask the one question everyone at the table wanted to know but didn't want to ask.

"So, Jane. Are you gonna tell us why you're back from vacation a month ahead of time?"

Frankie's eyes went wide as he kicked Frost in the leg under the table.

"Ow! What was that for? It was just a question."

"Yeah, a question Janie doesn't want to answer right now. I'm sorry Jane, I should've…."

"It's alright Frankie. I mean you guys will eventually find out sooner or later." Jane remarked, finishing the last of her beer.

"Yeah, so why don't you tell us sooner rather than later."

Jane rolled her eyes, ordered another beer and began to tell Frankie, Frost and Izzy what happened in her time away.

"Wait, whoa back up." Frost said when Jane was done. "This woman, Maria?,"

"Maura," Jane corrected.

"Sorry, Maura. Is a doctor, is funny, and smart?"

Jane nodded.

"Wow what the hell did she see in you?" He asked jokingly of course.

"Honestly? I don't know." Jane replied, her mood slowly turning to sadness.

"Way to go Frost. I told you to leave it alone."

"Frankie, really it's okay. If I'm going to be honest with all of you. Maura, she made me feel seen. Like she didn't just see me as this female cop with all this bravado. She saw the real me, the me behind the badge. She made everything better. Like shopping for instance, she made it fun. Imagine me having fun shopping." She remarked with a slight chuckle.

"She made documentaries enjoyable. Hell, I didn't even mind when she would point out the inaccuracies of the facts of movies we watched."

Jane smiled as she said these things but quickly let it fade. She would never have that with Maura again.

"Shit Jane, I didn't know you were in love with this woman." Frankie remarked, understanding why his sister didn't want to discuss what happened.

Izzy coughed as she choked on her drink. "Wait, you're in love with her? Did she feel the same?"

"Really Izzy? If she felt the same, do you think I would be sitting here with all of you tonight? I was stupid alright? Can we move on to something else now? Actually, scratch that. I'm just gonna go home. I'll see you guys later." Jane said, grabbing her coat and tossing some money down on the table.

She made it outside before Izzy caught up. "Jane, wait, hang on."

"Izzy, I'm a big girl. I can get home on my own." Jane said, stopping to look at Izzy.

"I know that, I just didn't want to be the only girl hanging out with those two numb skulls."

Jane laughed as she started walking again. They walked in silence for a few blocks before Izzy spoke.

"You really did love her, didn't you?"

Jane groaned. "This again, come on Izzy."

Izzy reached out and stopped Jane's walk. "I'm serious Jane."

The expression Jane saw looking back at her wasn't that of a bitter ex but rather a friend.

Sighing, Jane took a seat on a nearby bench. "I know it probably seems insane to you and everyone else. That someone can fall in love with someone in such little time, but I did Iz. I fell hard for Maura. She's unlike anyone I've ever met. She, God I can't believe I'm talking about this with you."

Izzy chuckled and shoved Jane slightly. "Oh shut up, just tell me what you were going to say."

"She's the one Izzy. There's no doubt in my mind that she's, my person. The person I'm meant to be with for the rest of my life."

Izzy would be lying if she said Jane's admission didn't sting a bit but to be fair, she's the one who wasn't ready for commitment and so she couldn't harbor bad feelings towards Jane or Maura for that matter. She couldn't be mad at Jane for moving on.

Covering Jane's hand with her own she squeezed. "If you feel that strongly Jane, why did you let her go so easily?"

"Because Izzy, her silence in the moment when I told her how I felt…. spoke every word that she couldn't or wouldn't say. She didn't feel the same about me."

Jane quickly wiped away a tear as it rolled down her cheek.

"I'm sorry Jane," Izzy said as she pulled the brunette into a hug. "With time it won't hurt so much."

"Speaking from experience?" Jane said with a slight chuckle.

"A little, yeah." Izzy replied with a smile as they pulled apart.

"Thanks Izzy,"

"Anytime Jane, now how about we get something to eat. That alcohol made me hungry."

"You're always hungry."

"No, that's you." Izzy replied back as they stood and began walking again. Their voices and laughter faded into the night.