By Kalnaman
A/N: Thank you VirginSerpent for beta. And thank you all for your reviews and your support about my dad, it really does mean a lot to me.
Hotch was so worried about Reid. Why did Diana Reid's psychiatrist want to talk to him about Dr. Reid? Did it have something to do with the Hankel case? Hotch felt guilty. Guilty that he hadn't helped Reid after he'd been kidnapped. But as the boy was a genius he'd thought that he could have handled it by himself. And if not, he'd been sure that Gideon would have helped him since he's the boy's father figure and mentor.
Hotch hurried out of his office and down to Morgan's desk.
"Morgan. I have some important things to take care of. I'll probably be gone for a few days. I don't know how long it will take me. Do you mind taking charge while I'm gone?"
Morgan looked worriedly up at him. "What's wrong, Hotch?"
Hotch closed his eyes for a few seconds. "Sorry, Morgan, but I can't tell you as I don't know what is wrong yet. I'll find out as soon as I get there."
"And where is there?"
Hotch shook his head. "Sorry, Morgan. I'll tell you as soon as I can, and when I know you need to know about it. Please, trust me. So, do you want to take over for me or not? I can call a friend of mine; Agent David Rossi, if you think you can't handle being in charge of the BAU."
Morgan put up his hands in defeat. "Okay, okay. Yes, I can handle it. But please call me if you need my help."
Hotch nodded, satisfied. "I will. I promise."
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Yes," Hotch said, but his facial expression told him to be quick about it.
"Is it about Reid?"
Hotch nodded sadly. "Yes, but as I said; I don't know what the problem is yet."
Morgan stood up in a flash. "Maybe you should call that Rossi guy. I think I should go with you to help the kid."
Hotch shook his head. "No, sorry. I need you here Morgan. I promise I'll call you as soon as I know that Reid or I need your help, and I'm sure we will soon." Hotch could see that Morgan wanted to argue with him. "Please, Morgan. Maybe it's nothing."
"Maybe? Well you sure look very worried, and it doesn't seem that the problem is nothing!"
"Morgan, please. Reid's mother's doctor told me to come. He needs to tell me something about Reid and he couldn't tell me over the phone."
Morgan looked pleadingly at Hotch. "Please, Hotch. Let me come with you."
"No sorry. I really need you here. I can help Reid better when I know that you're here to hold the fort. Please."
As Morgan wasn't used to Hotch saying please to him, he couldn't deny Hotch's request and then nodded sadly. "Okay. But you better get the boy home safe."
"I will, I promise. Thanks," Hotch said with a small smile and went to get his to go-bag and left for Las Vegas.
oOo
The flight from Quantico to Las Vegas felt like an eternity to Hotch. Millions of things went through his head about what could be wrong with Reid. He just hoped that he wouldn't arrive at the hospital too late.
He was happy when he finally arrived at Dr. Norman's office. But he got the shock of his life when he noticed an unconscious Reid on the doctor's couch. "What the hell happened to Reid?!"
Dr. Norman held up his hand in a sign for Hotch to calm down. "Please, calm down. I don't want you to wake up Spencer. He needs his rest."
"Please tell me what happened to him. Did one of your patients hurt him?" Hotch asked as calmly as he could.
"No, a patient didn't harm him. I had to sedate him because he harmed..."
"You what?!"
"Please, Agent Hotchner. You need to calm down. I really don't want you to wake Spencer up. I want him to wake up on his own."
Hotch looked angrily at the doctor. "How can you give Re… Spencer a sedative! He isn't one of your patients!"
"As Spencer harmed himself with a knife, here in my hospital, I had every right to do so!" Dr. Norman said as calmly as he could, but he was also about to lose his calm.
Hotch looked unbelieving at the doctor. "H-he what?!"
Dr. Norman laid a hand on Hotch's shoulder and gestured for him to take a seat at his desk while he took a seat as well. "I'm sorry to tell you, Agent Hotchner. But Sp… Dr. Reid is a troubled young man and he needs help. A patient of mine told a nurse that he'd witnessed Dr. Reid cutting himself…"
Hotch rubbed his face with his right hand. "Isn't it a possibility that the patient was just hallucinating?"he asked hopefully.
The doctor shook his head sadly. "No, sorry. On his way out of this hospital I noticed blood on his arm. I asked him about it, and told me that it happened at work a few days ago…"
"What?! Reid wasn't at work a few days ago. He's been on vacation for over a week now."
"Yes, that was exactly what I thought. I made him show me his arm. There is no doubt Agent Hotchner. The wound on his arm was self inflicted. And he had the knife he used on him."
Hotch didn't know what to say. He would never have thought that Reid would ever harm himself… that he would be a cutter.
As if Dr. Norman knew what he was thinking he said, "He hasn't been cutting for long. The other cuts are not much older than a few weeks."
"Other cuts?"
"Yes other cuts. The cut he made today wasn't the first. He doesn't have scars that are older than a few weeks though."
"A few weeks ago he was kidnapped and drugged. So it all started after his kidnapping."
Dr. Norman nodded sadly. "Yes, it would seem like it."
Hotch looked hopefully at the doctor. "Since it's in an early stage, Reid will be alright soon won't he? I'll take him home and let him know that he can come to me at anytime…"
"Sorry, that isn't good enough. Cutting isn't Dr. Reid's only problem. He's bulimic too, and he's fighting against the need to medicate himself with Dilaudid. And he's showing all the signs that he hasn't been sleeping much since the kidnapping. Didn't he get any help after the incident? Isn't there a rule that you have to have a psych evaluation after a trauma like the kidnapping that he's been through?"
Hotch nodded and rubbed his face once again, and then looked behind him and over to where Spencer was lying still asleep. Then he turned his attention back to the doctor. "Yes there is, and he has had one. He passed with flying colors and that's why I thought that everything was okay. That he was coping well."
"People with the problems like Spencer has, are good at lying to others and themselves."
Hotch nodded sadly. "I know." He let out a loud sigh. "I'll take him home as soon as he wakes up, I'll make sure he gets into group therapy."
Dr. Norman shook his head sadly. "No. That is not enough. If you let him live on his own in the state he's in, I know he'll soon cut too deep and then it'll be too late. You or Agent Gideon had better take action in regard to Dr. Reid's life; if you don't I will. And neither you nor Dr. Reid will like the outcome of it, if I'm forced to do so." The doctor held his right thumb few centimeters away from his index finger. "I'm this close to going to the district attorney to help me order a 72 hour observation period and get a room for him beside his mother's."
"Okay, okay. I'll take some much needed vacation time and bring him home with me. And I promise I won't let him out of my sight. I'll make him see a therapist as often as the therapist recommends Reid to see him."
The doctor nodded satisfied. "I'm happy that you are agreeing to this. I would hate to be forced to commit him. He's a fine young man. It would be a shame if he ends up like his mother. I know I ask a lot of you, since you are his boss and not his family. But since Spencer has put you up as his next of kin along with Agent Gideon…"
"He what? He's really written me up as his next of kin? I only thought that Gideon was that close to him. Even though I feel like he's one of my family."
"Yes he did. He gave us you and Agent Gideon as his next of kin."
Hotch smiled proudly. He'd never thought that Spencer had thought that way too. Then his smile faded. He had failed him along with Gideon. The whole BAU team… his family had failed him. They had failed their youngest. He promised Spencer, that from now on he would never fail him again. He would do everything in his power to protect him from others and especially from himself.
"When can I take him home?"
"As soon as he's ready after he's woken up." Dr. Norman opened a drawer and pulled out a business card and gave it to Hotch. "This is the number of a doctor that specializes in the problems that Dr. Reid is suffering from. I'm sure he can help him. I'll call him and tell him that he can expect your call very soon."
Hotch took the card and nodded. "I'll make sure to contact him and make sure that Reid is going to see him."
"Good. He's always welcome to visit his mother, but as long as he's in this condition, I'd prefer that someone he trusts is by his side. I don't want him to face his mother's illness on his own."
Hotch nodded. "Sure. He was alone, but not anymore. I promise. Is it okay if I leave for an hour or two? I need to make some arrangements for our trip home and for Reid to move in with me. He's not going to like it. He's been on his own way before he had his mother committed."
The doctor nodded sadly. "Yes he has. And the authorities have failed him badly. His father or social services should never have left him alone with his mother. They should have allowed him to be a child. A child shouldn't have that kind of responsibility. And as for him not liking you taking charge, I'm not so sure about that. I think cutting himself here - at a mental facility - was a cry for help. He probably won't admit that to either us or himself, but I'm sure it was. I think he wants and needs someone take charge of him for once. I'm sure he'll fight you at first, but that will only be because he thinks that it's the way people expect him to react."
Hotch nodded and then stood up and went to Spencer. He gently brushed a strand of hair from Spencer's eyes. "I'm here for you now, Spencer. I promise."
"I'll keep an eye on him until you get back."
"Thank you. But please, call me if he should wake up before I'm back."
"I promise." And with that Hotch left the office.
oOo
Hotch tried to call Gideon for the umpteenth time, but sadly with no luck. He had managed to get in contact with Prentiss. He'd made her promise that she wouldn't tell the rest of the team, at least not just yet. She would go to Reid's apartment and bring what she thought he would need while living at Hotch's place. She wasn't happy to agree with him to go to Reid's place and take things without his consent. Hotch had told her that he'd just called Reid's family lawyer, and he'd told him that Reid had given Gideon and him power of attorney. And since Reid wasn't fit to handle his own affairs at the moment, Hotch had the right to decide what the best was for him at the moment.
He then arranged for an FBI jet to bring them back to Quantico so Spencer wasn't forced to face strangers on his way home.
oOo
When Hotch went back to the doctor's office, he was happy that Reid hadn't woken up while he was gone.
While Reid still slept Dr. Norman used the opportunity to give Hotch some good advice on how to handle Reid. Like not allowing him to go to the bathroom on his own, especially after he'd eaten. Keeping all sharp objects out of his reach. Making sure that Reid knew that there were people that cared about him and that he was not alone.
"I have a feeling that you're not a physical contact kind of guy. Am I right?"
Hotch started to become uneasy. He didn't like when others profiled him. "Y-yes. You're right. I'm not. But I do have a son and I don't have any problems showing him that I love him and that I'm proud of him."
"Good. Then look at Reid as your son or as your brother that needs physical contact. He'll need some hugs from time to time, just like your son does. It doesn't have to be all the time, just do it when your instincts tell you that he needs it."
Hotch nodded. "I promise, I'll do my best."
They stopped talking as they could hear that Spencer started to stir. They hurried to his side. Hotch took a seat on the couch beside him.
Reid looked at Hotch confused, as soon as he'd opened his eyes and had gotten the sleepiness out of them. "Hotch?"
"Hi, Reid. I'm here to take you home."
"Home?" He then looked from Hotch to Dr. Norman and looked accusingly at him. "You sedated me!" He hurried to sit up. Hotch placed a hand on his shoulder. "Reid. Please calm down."
Reid turned his attention back to Hotch. "But Hotch. He forced a needle in me against my will!"
"Yes he did. But why was he forced to do so? Tell me Reid."
Spencer shook his head. "No. I don't want to."
Hotch took a hold on his chin and made him look him into his eyes. "Spencer Reid! Tell me; why was he forced to sedate you?!"
"I-I cut m-myself."
"And why else?"
"I-I h-haven't been sleeping much lately, a-and m-my body needed to get some rest."
"And because he cares about you Reid. He gave you the sedative because you needed it."
Spencer nodded sadly.
"Rei… Spencer. You're not going to like what I'm about to tell you. You're going to live with me for the time being, until…"
Spencer looked shocked up at him. "What?! No way! And you can't make me!"
"Yes I can Spencer. You gave me power of attorney along with Gideon, remember?"
"Yes, but…"
"No buts, Spencer. It's either that or a commitment to a mental health facility."
Spencer started to cry. "No, please Hotch. I don't want to be locked up like my mom."
"Then go home with me without a fight and do as I ask you to. And you'll need to see the therapist that Dr. Norman has recommended you see. I've just talked to him and he's expecting you tomorrow morning at eight."
"But I don't want therapy. I can handle my problems on my own, like I've always done."
"Sorry, Spencer. But you have proven to us that you can't. You either have to be an in-patient or an out-patient."
Tears were running freely down Spencer's cheeks. "Okay, I'll come home with you and see the therapist. But please, don't lock me up!"
"I promise. But if one day your therapist thinks it would be best for you to be an in-patient because you're dangerous to yourself and others, I won't stand in the doctor's way."
Spencer nodded sadly. "I promise I won't ever be."
Hotch gave him a slight hug. "Let's cross that bridge when and if we ever get there ever."
"You want anything to eat before you two leave Las Vegas?" Dr. Norman asked both of them.
"I'm not hungry," came from Spencer and Hotch said, "No we'll have something on the plane." Hotch then turned his attention back to Spencer. "You are going to eat something on the plane," he said that brooked no arguments and Spencer pouted.
oOo
Hotch had followed Spencer to the bathroom so he could freshen up a bit. "I'm a big boy Hotch. I can go to the bathroom on my own."
"Sorry, kiddo. For the next couple of months you won't be allowed to go into any bathrooms on your own." Spencer looked shocked at him. "You can't be serious!"
"Oh, you can bet I am! I don't want to lose you, Reid." Spencer let out a loud sigh.
oOo
They went back to the office. "So are you ready to leave?" Dr. Norman asked.
"Yes, we are Doctor," Hotch said.
Spencer looked shyly at the doctor, "Can I see my mom before we leave?"
Dr. Norman shook his head sadly. "No, I'm sorry. I'm not thinking of your mom's interests at the moment, but yours. I don't think seeing your mom in the state she is in at the moment is good for you. You can visit her when you are doing better, but you will have to have someone with you to support you."
Spencer was tired, he wanted to argue, but he didn't have the strength to do so. So he silently left the hospital with his new keeper – Hotch - in tow. Hotch had promised Dr. Norman to contact him if he needed his help, no matter how small the problem was.
oOo
It was pure torture for Spencer on the plane. Hotch was forcing him to eat. He was told to stay at the table with the food until he had eaten at least the half of what was on his plate.
It took him almost an hour until he had eaten half of it. He hurried out of his chair and to the bathroom. Just as he was about to close the door to the bathroom, Hotch put a foot in the doorway keeping him from locking it. "Sorry, Reid. But I have to come inside with you. You know the rules."
Spencer let out a sigh. It was going to be a hard long couple of months. What he didn't know was that it would be a whole year before he would get some of his independency back.
TBC