A Dangerous Mind

I fear that soon you'll reveal
Your dangerous mind.

It's in your eyes, what's on your mind.
I fear your smile and the promise inside.
It's in your eyes, what's on your mind.
I fear your presence, I'm frozen inside.

I'm searching for answers
Not questioned before.
The curse of awareness,
There's no peace of mind.
As your true colors show
A dangerous sign.

I just have to know, while I still have time.
Do I have to run, or hide away from you?

--

--

Sesshoumaru lay on the soft emerald grass staring into space. Sun was already rising. It stained the sky with its reds, yellows and oranges. He wished he could wipe it all off, clean the sky from those vibrant colors that insulted his sulking. He was not in the mood to admire beautiful sunrises. More than anything he wished that it would rain hard, so much that it would beat the ground bare and take away his somber thoughts.

Since he came to that cursed place he had not moved a muscle. He was starting to get sore and he hardly felt his other arm but he couldn't care less. His thoughts were going around in circles. One moment he was thinking of the weather and the next thing he noticed was that he was recalling certain events from the past, memories that could have stayed away. The death mask of Naraku kept haunting him.

More than anything he was angry at himself. He had not expected himself to be quite this pathetic sort of thing. However, apparently he was just that, pathetic and weak. Both were qualities he did not want to posses.

Honestly, what the hell was wrong with him?

He had gotten what he had wanted, hadn't he? He had tried to find a way to kill Naraku for a long time already. He had dreamed of seeing his dead body lying on the ground. He had wished to kill him with his own two hands. He had wanted to make him suffer.

So why was it that now that his wishes had come true, all he felt was…remorse? Could it be because he had not been the one giving the final blow?

No, that could not be it. It had actually gone better than he had ever expected. The look on Naraku's face when he realized Sesshoumaru wouldn't be the one killing him had been that of pure agony. Sesshoumaru had wanted to find a way to hurt him, make him suffer, more than he ever had before. He had succeeded magnificently.

And yet, he didn't have any feelings of happiness nor satisfaction in him. It was frustrating and confusing. Something he did not want to be was confused, the feeling didn't suit him.

The mighty demon lord sighed. When was the last time he had done that? He felt like he hardly knew himself anymore. Things had started to go wrong ever since he first realized those hidden feelings inside him. That consuming passion he wasn't able to get rid of no matter how many times he tried. Yet, to this point, he had always thought that it really was just passion. Something carnal and uncontrollable. He knew he had that inside him, why else would he try so hard to stay in control over his emotion. But if it was just something carnal, why was it like this now? Why couldn't he get his mind to work properly?

Self-discipline was something he did not lack. Usually. Now was different. The whole time had had lain there, he had tried to will it all away, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't succeed. The images still kept coming and he could still hear that cursed voice whispering to him. Even now…

"What a surprise to find you here of all places…"

Sesshoumaru quickly sat up. His body began to sting all over because of the sudden movement, and when the blood once again found its way into the right places. His eyes widened slightly as he saw the person walking out of the woods.

"Why so surprised?" Naraku asked, smiling slyly. His voice was deep, and it sounded like he was trying to taste the words coming from his mouth. He enjoyed seeing the effect his words caused, the confusion that was so obvious on Sesshoumaru's face.

Sesshoumaru stood up and backed away, eyeing him suspiciously. He wasn't sure why he felt like screaming and running away. All he knew was that every hair on his body was standing up and his instincts screamed to him to get away as quickly as possible.

Normally he wouldn't hesitate a second. He would listen to whatever his instincts told him, or he'd attack without a warning and get rid of the danger. Now, on the other hand, he couldn't do either. It was as if his body refused to listen what his mind was screaming it to do. Not even his mind work as it was supposed to. Part of him said that he should get away, and part of him (and that part made him extremely frustrated) wanted to go to the smirking man in front of him and wrap his arms around him.

Naraku examined him carefully. Sesshoumaru felt a very uncharacteristic shiver go down his spine and straight to his knees, as Naraku's burning maroon eyes swept over him. Sesshoumaru could feel how the all too familiar fire began to burn once again. Luckily, that was what woke him up from his daze.

"How can you still be alive?" he spat.

Naraku pouted his lips. "Oh Sesshoumaru, that's so cold of you. Can't you say something nicer?"

"I have nothing nice to say to you!" Sesshoumaru growled between his teeth.

Naraku raised an eyebrow at his behavior. "Relax, would you. It's not like I'm here to kill you. I didn't even expect you to be here." There was a short pause. "Why are you here anyway?"

"None of your business!"

"Stop acting like a nasty bitch and act like you normally do. That way I can at least hold some kind of a conversation with you. Not that it would be easy that way either." Naraku slumped down to the ground and straightened his legs. "Damn, I'm sore! You have no idea how hard it is to move after your body has once gone cold."

Sesshoumaru stared at the creature in front of him. "Why did you come here?" Sesshoumaru asked before he even realized he was going to do so. He mentally slapped himself. He really should get away, fast.

"Well, as I woke up from my beauty sleep, I gradually came to realize that I had nowhere to go to or anything to do. This was the first place that came to my mind. That's about it", Naraku explained and shrugged. He gave Sesshoumaru a sideways glance. "I imagine you're not going to tell me your reason for lying here, eh?"

Sesshoumaru avoided his intense gaze. He was not enough in control over his emotions that he could have put on a perfect façade. It was better to look away than to reveal how confused he really was at the moment. "How can you still be alive?"

"No idea whatsoever. That's what I came here to think about. The next thing I was going to do was to find you, but I guess I already managed to do that."

Sesshoumaru's body tensed. Naraku had something in his mind and experience told him that that wasn't a good thing. It was clear in Naraku's eyes, he had already formed a new plan, and his smile promised that it would include Sesshoumaru, wouldn't matter if he wanted it or not.

Naraku's smirk widened as he turned his head to fully look at Sesshoumaru. He lay down and rested his head on the palm of his hand. "So tell me, Sesshoumaru, did you enjoy it?"

Sesshoumaru's brow furrowed. "What are you talking about?"

"Come on, you know what I'm talking about", Naraku whined playfully. The sneering smirk was glued on his face and yet his eyes burned with such a fire that it was almost like there really was a flame inside of him. "Did you enjoy the show? Did you feel pleased to see me die? Was it all you ever dreamed of?"

"Do not think so highly of yourself! You are hardly worth of my dreams!" Sesshoumaru spat and straightened his posture.

"That may be true", Naraku almost hummed, "but it doesn't change the fact that I'm in them."

Sesshoumaru gritted his teeth. The action made Naraku chuckle. "That's what I thought."

He got up from the ground and walked towards Sesshoumaru. His movements were a bit awkward and stiff, like he wasn't quite sure how to walk, but the determination on his face made it impossible to laugh at such a child like movements. Not that laughing even crossed Sesshoumaru's mind. He was unable to move at all. He could only watch how the other man came closer and closer. His mind began to once again scream the instructions to flee, but something was holding him there. Something that made his chest feel tight and heart pound like there was no tomorrow.

Naraku reached him and placed his hands on his hips. Sesshoumaru was so frozen that he wasn't even thinking of brushing the other man's hands away. His touch was hot through the clothes and the burning desire inside Sesshoumaru grew even stronger. How he wished it would disappear before it would reach his eyes.

Naraku moved his head right next to Sesshoumaru's. He blew a few strands of pure white hair out of his way and brushed his lips against the angel's ear. "Were you really planning to get away from me? Did you think you could escape me?"

The words made Sesshoumaru's brain work again. He tried to push the other away, but Naraku had a too strong grip, he was stuck. "Let go of me you skunk!" he growled and kept struggling.

"I don't think I want to do that", Naraku sneered, still smirking. His hands quickly moved under Sesshoumaru's clothes. When his hands made contact with Sesshoumaru's skin, the demon let out an unintentional gasp. "Ah, I missed that sound. It has been too long…" Naraku placed a kiss on Sesshoumaru's neck.

"I said let go of me!" Sesshoumaru shouted and punched. It was a perfect hit, straight to Naraku's cheek. He flew away from him and landed on the ground.

"Ouch, no need to be so violent", Naraku muttered and touched the cut on the side of his mouth.

Sesshoumaru breathed heavily. He couldn't believe he had almost been sucked into that asshole's pace. He had almost fallen again. There was still a part of him that yearned to have the lost touch back. The place where Naraku had kissed him still burned.

"I don't care how you're still alive. It does not concern me. Neither do you. You were already killed once, my dealings with you end there. Stay as far away from me as possible, you spider!"

Naraku cocked his head and the smirk was back on his face. "That's where you're wrong my beloved Sesshoumaru. I have no intention of letting you run away from me."

Sesshoumaru bared his teeth and let out a low growl. "You won't let me?"

"No", Naraku stated. He sat up straight and looked far too relaxed for Sesshoumaru's liking. "You see, me being dead, and more importantly you watching me die, might not be a big deal for you, but it is for me – if you can imagine why. It seems that I simply cannot forget the person, who so graciously stood on a hilltop like a white angel of death, watching how life left me behind. I'm very interested to know if he enjoyed it, and what he was thinking after it was all over. And more importantly, what is going on in his head now that he knows I'm still alive."

Sesshoumaru was quiet for a moment. "You want revenge?"

Naraku's smirk grew even wider. "Hmm… I wonder…"

The irritation was now clear on Sesshoumaru's face. "Do not play your games with me, you scum!"

"My dear Sesshoumaru, I have every intention of doing so. Unless of course you decide to kill me, again, right here and now. I must confess, I'm not in my best shape at the moment. Being resurrected takes a certain amount of energy, you know."

"I have no intention of getting involved with you anymore", Sesshoumaru said quietly. "It's already finished." Then he quickly lifted himself in the air and flew away, leaving Naraku behind.

"Oh no, Sesshoumaru. It's only beginning", Naraku muttered. The sneering smirk on his face turned into a pleased smile as watched the rising sun.

--

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I don't own anything (exept the stroyline) and so on... The song in the beginning is Within Temptation's Dangerous Mind. This is my plan, I use songs for now. Just so you know, I always think these things through very carefully, so there is a real meaning behing every song I pick. Try to figure out. Unfortunately my mind is awfully hard to crack... I try to make this easy.

Anyway, Since this is, in a way, a request fic, I'm open to suggestions and ideas. (I mean really, I am) So I hope I'll be hearing from you! ^^ Personally I have a few ideas in mind that I have already written, but for now, it's up to you.

I'm sick, so I'm going to bed now. If there are spelling errors or some stupid mistake or two, it is because of my fever. (Oh, and I also finally updated my profile ^^ No idea why I said that...)

~Val