Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Dang it.

Bella P.O.V.

I skipped merrily into the backstage dressing room of the circus tent, excited at the prospect of being Edward's assistant in another show. I only hoped this one didn't end with teeth marks and my love writhing on the ground yelling fervently about the Muffin Man.

I'd bought him a pastry the next day. He didn't think it was funny. I giggled to myself at the memory, reaching along the dressing room walls for a light switch and humming some show tunes Carlisle had been blasting out of the tour bus speakers.

I'd finally found the switch when I felt a small hand curl around my wrist. I yelped, jumping back and tripping into a chair. A malicious cackle pierced the air, stinging my ears through the darkness.

"E-Edward?" I whimpered.

"No, my pretty. It's not Edward." Suddenly a blinding light flashed into my eyes sending floating bubbles swirling over my corneas.

"Oooo, pretty colors…" I giggled before shaking my head to clear it.

"Who's there?" I yelled through the dazzling light.

I was about to scream again when Alice's tiny figure dropped into my field of vision from the ceiling beams. I let out a sigh of relief. But then I realized where we were.

Alice's territory.

I gulped, giving her a sheepish smile.

"Hey Alice." I murmured artlessly.

"Hello Bella." she whispered, a spooky glint in her eyes. "What brings you here?"

"Well, I was just looking for a pin to fix my robe, so I'll be going now." I said with a smile, lurching out of the chair. Like a flash Alice dropped down, and with a forceful strike to my gut, shoved me back onto the chair. I whimpered.

As graceful as a twinkle in the sky she drifted back up into the rafters.

"Whew, that was a close one." I whispered to myself. I heard another cackle and looked down to find myself tied up with ropes. The knots were in the shapes of hearts. Excellent craftsmanship. Evil, but excellent.

"Now Bella, we can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way." Alice threatened, her tiny features scrunched up in excitement and anticipation.

"Err…what's the hard way?" I squeaked. Her face became cold.

"I can have Jasper get the lion in here." she stated calmly, but the warning was clear in her bell like voice. I gulped again, closing my eyes.

"Just get it over with." I whispered. I could practically feel the static electricity flowing like a current from her body, channeling her enthusiasm.

"Yay!" she sang, dropping down farther and grabbing the makeup and curling iron from the counter.

"Let's get this party started." I felt her violently pounding my hair to a pulp, using force to turn the straight strings of hair into what I assumed to be curly ringlets. She smeared unknown and possibly dangerous substances across my face, the jumble of colors making me cross eyed. And when the last eyebrow hair was ferociously plucked from my sore face, Alice finally stopped.

"Beautiful." she whispered, wiping an invisible tear from her eye. I rolled my eyes as she untied me. I stood up, stretching.

"Gosh Alice, that was a lot of preparation. I'm just Edward's assistant, it's not like I do anything much." I said with a yawn.

"Uhhh…yeah…assistant." she said with a nervous giggle. I glared at her.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked uneasily. No answer.

"Alice…AHHHHHHH!" I screeched as I caught my reflection in the vanity mirror.

"R...rrrr…red nose…blue lips? Afro?" I mumbled incoherently. Alice giggled again.

"Carlisle didn't mention anything? You're filling in for the clown today."

A/N: Hehe. I think this might be my favorite I've written so far. PLEASE review?