Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight!

Bella's P.O.V.

Previously…

"Quilted Northern!" he shouted.

"Wait! Edward! I wasn't touching you, the trick isn't going to go right!" I screamed over the sudden tornado winds sweeping through the room. Edward gulped.

"Uh-oh."

And then everything went black.

Presently…

"HiyaHayaHiyaHayaHiyaHaya…" a peculiar chant reached my eardrums.

"Edwaaaard, turn off your festival mantra album and go to sleep." I grumbled, squeezing my eyes closed tighter.

The chant continued. I growled, rolling out of bed. But my feet didn't touch the floor.

"Jeepers!" I squeaked, falling a few feet into a squishy carpet of pine needles.

I looked up at the tree I had fallen out of. It looked a bit like Jeff. Wait, who's Jeff? Dammit Jeff, go find your own story to star in. Anyway, as I was saying, the tree looked like….a tree. I scrambled to my feet.

"Edward?" I whispered, scared of this strange foreign land.

I looked down and screamed like a man-eating koala bear was gnawing at my best drapes. It wasn't squishy pine needles I had landed on. The ground was made of… gumdrops. Gumdrops of many colors. I gulped. What was this place? I looked around in wonder. Lollipop trees grew freely and a chocolate rainbow laced the open sky.

"Can it be?" I whispered in awe. It must be. But just what it must be, I did not know.

"Edwarrrd! You gotta see this!" I shrieked, racing through the lollipop forest like a mad pig looking for truffles. Yet the truffles were hanging in bunches from licorice ropes, dancing in the pixie dust wind. Drool poured from my open mouth like a broken dam.

As I skipped merrily through a field of marshmallows I stopped dead in my tracks. So that's where that chanting was coming from. A monstrous milk chocolate castle stood in the field, towering over the candy. The chant poured from the windows, tap-dancing across the field. I gulped again, scampering up to the door.

"Hellooooooo!" I sung, knocking lightly. The chant stopped.

"Bella?" Edward's manly voice came from inside as he opened the door.

"Edward!" I screamed, throwing myself into his arms. His smell of tangerines and sweat socks had been replaced by the saccharine odor of chocolate.

"Bella! There you are! You gotta come meet my new friends!" he chirped, dragging me through the hallway with his chocolate drenched hands.

"Meet, Chocolate, Vanilla, and Strawberry! They are the supreme rulers of this land!" he declared with a goofy chuckle.

"Umm, nice to meet you… but I do have a question." I smiled meekly at them.

"Yes?" they asked in unison.

"Why would the rulers of a candy land be…..pickles?"

"Because, sweet, young girl…. sweet, young, tasty, scrumptious, mouthwatering, delectable, succulent, appetizing girl….it is just how it is." they explained.

"Ahh, I see." I agreed, blatantly ignoring the way they were glaring at me like I was the last donut present at a cop convention.

The giant pickles grinned. Quite evilly, I might add.

"Pssst, Edward….didn't Emmett warn us about this? The prophesy?" I whispered. Edward scratched his head thoughtfully.

"Hmm…I do believe he mentioned something about never trusting giant pickles…because they are merely cucumbers dipped in evil." he agreed.

"So…shouldn't we be leaving?" I squeaked.

"No, they seem perfectly polite to me!" he exclaimed. I nodded.

"Now that you have found your friend…shall we get back to the ceremony?" the pickles asked, slime creeping down their olive colored bumpy bodies.

"Yes! Of course!" Edward giggled. He skipped over to them, lying cheerfully down on the buffet table in front of them. I had a bad feeling in my gut about this. It felt like a blindfolded woodchuck was trying to win the Daytona 500 in my stomach.

"Edward…" I mumbled.

"Silence, scrumptious girl! You will not ruin this for us! We have not had a decent meal in three thousand years!" they roared. Long chains flew from the chocolate floor boards, winding their way around my Edward's wrists and ankles.

"Noooo!" I bawled as their slimy green arms picked up their forks and knives. I fell to the chocolate floor and suddenly I was sinking knee deep into the ground.

"Nooooo! Edward! Nooooo!" I shrieked, slowly slipping into a chocolate tomb. The last image I registered was of Edward grinning goofily up at the mammoth pickles as they tied bibs around their necks and licked their lips like sultry lipstick models. Then everything went black once more.

...

"Bella! Bella, are you alright?" my angel's voice tinkled sweetly in my ear.

"Yes Edward…I'm very alright…" I slobbered, imagining his face, his completely uneaten face clean of pickle juice and melted chocolate. Then I opened my eyes.

"Thank goodness Bella!" Carlisle exclaimed! "Are you sure you're alright? You were having a terrible nightmare, screaming about pickles and prophesies!"

"It was…just a dream?" I asked, dazed.

"Yes Bella, just a dream." Edward smiled, brushing the matted hair back from my face. I threw my arms around him.

Just then Alice came swinging down the tour bus.

"Who replaced the ground with gumdrops?" she asked in a bewildered voice, her blue eyes wide and startled.

I froze.

Dun dun dun.