A/N Hello, everyone! I could have posted this yesterday but I was insanely busy so here it is today.

Thank you for your generous comments and please keep them coming if you can :)

Enjoy…

THE GEEK AND THE REBEL

"Looks like he's picturing your face," sighed Izzie sipping on her beer. They all looked in Derek's direction. He was playing darts with Alex Karev and George O'Malley at the other side of Joe's bar. His jaw was all set, an apparently permanent scowl on his face as he pretended not to look nor care what Meredith was doing.

"It's not her face that he's picturing," remarked lightly Cristina. "But every guy's that gets closer to Mer."

Meredith sighed audibly, "It was a bad idea to come here at all tonight. I should get my things and go. We can have a drink another time."

"I don't think it matters when that another time is," chuckled Cristina. "He would still be here like your silent protector or something. I haven't seen him here for ages. He's here because you are."

Meredith bit her lip. It was a whole week after the big break-up. It still felt as it was yesterday though. As it was five minutes ago. It was as raw and painful as though she was breaking up with him this very minute.

It was the worst week of her life. Incontestably. Most demanding exam sessions at med school left her feeling a lot better. After all, she he had been able to slid into Derek's comforting arms every night and smile just because he was there with her. Not so much anymore...

Those couple of days were awkward, to say the least. He tried to act almost causal towards her, like there wasn't that giant elephant of failed relationship between them. He was helpful, attentive… and she was avoiding. She was aware that perhaps he needed a more gradual change but she couldn't help trying to work with anyone else but him, working her schedules so that they didn't cover with his. She was dealing the best she could but sometimes it hurt too much to look at him. She was also in constant fear that he might approach personal topics. That he would finally say he only loved her as a good friend and that they should just split financially as soon as possible. She knew it had to happen but…

Her feelings were so conflicted between her wishing for him to be finally happy and for herself to stop hurting.

Their eyes met across the bar. His bluish orbs turned stormy again. She loved that violent passionate shade, that side of him she uncovered over the years.

"Evening, ladies," one of their fellow interns, Jackson Avery, halted at their table with a dazzling smile.

"Avery!" smirked Cristina. "You too trolling for females?"

"Certainly not," he grinned, his expressive eyes moving over them to stop on Meredith.

"Oh, just for one," Izzie wiggled her eyebrows.

Meredith felt hot around her face. Was she just falling victim to her friends' poor attempts at matchmaking? She was not comfortable in this situation. She wasn't ready to be in this situation. She didn't want to. She wanted to run for the hills. Izzie and Cristina should know better than that. And well, they didn't know enough about Derek's possessiveness. He loved her or not, he was possessive of her. This evening might not go very well for somebody, especially if Derek really was at Joe's because of her.

"Meredith? How are you doing?" Jackson asked with a gentle smile.

She looked at him insecurely. He was a nice good looking guy, a pretty boy as Cristina liked to call him. He was completely different than Sloan and Karev though. And Derek, well, Derek was in some limbo between them but he still was the man after her heart anyway.

"I… good, I'm good," she breathed out giving him the tiniest of smiles. Maybe he'd go continue this evening if she was nice to him.

"I just wanted to say," he cocked his head. "You rocked in that OR today. You were a rock star."

"Oh, I… know that but… thank you anyway…" she rambled out.

"Okay… so, I…" he paused as though waiting for an initiation to join them, "I'll see you around," he finished a bit defeated.

"See you," she breathed out with relief when he mingled back into the crowd.

She stared at her companions who were biting their lips trying not to laugh out.

"What?" she frowned.

"Oh, Mer," Izzie shook her head, a grin spreading on her face. "That was awful."

"It… it was," chortled Cristina.

"Poor guy," sighed Izzie. "You crushed him."

"What the hell I was supposed to?" gasped Meredith. "And you are the one who suck! Why did you encourage him?"

"You need some fun. I know you're still pining for Shepherd but you'll never stop unless you try!"

"I don't need-" she trailed off seeing a peculiar scene unfolding. Mark Sloan entered the pub making his way towards his colleagues. But he stopped in his tracks when his eyes met Derek's and rerouted.

"What's with the manwhore?" asked Meredith pensively.

"Sloan?" Cristina followed her eyes. "Ah, Shepherd's broken up with him too. No idea why."

Derek pretended he didn't even notice Mark and returned to playing darts with O'Malley.

"That's weird…"

"I think it's good," Izzie remarked cautiously. "He was a bad influence on Derek. You see? He's really trying to make things-"

"Izzie, please!"

"Fine," the blond shrugged her shoulders.

"You need-" started Cristina.

"I need a bit of silence on your part," she bit back and stood up. "I'm going to get another drink. You wanna something from the bar?"

"The bar, just the place for you," said enthusiastically Cristina getting to her feet as well, Izzie at their heels. "Full of men that are just dying to give you a bit of relief."

"Cristina, how can you say something like this," argued Izzie haughtily as they stopped in the queue. "She should try to date someone first, not hop to bed with a first guy that smiles at her!"

"Maybe, but sex is good for everything," shrugged Cristina. "And it doesn't leave you heartbroken."

"You two are just annoying," Meredith uttered under her breath.

"Seriously, you need to get laid," insisted Cristina.

"I don't need to get laid. I don't want to get laid!" Frankly? She missed sex. Like hell. But only because it was with Derek. All the bar could strip for her and she wouldn't care.

"How can you not want to get laid?" frowned Cristina. "Was Shepherd really that bad?"

"Would you just shut up about it if I tell you once, just this once?" huffed Meredith impatiently, both Cristina and Izzie giving her now their undivided attention. "Derek was not bad. We didn't have bad sex. We had amazing sex. Derek is amazing in bed. And with all due respect to your, er, experience, I bet you didn't have anything as long and thick as I did," she finished proudly looking at them with superiority. She didn't get the reaction she expected. Izzie was staring fixedly at the ceiling, her cheeks tinged with red, while Cristina was trying hard to contain her amusement.

Meredith's stomach made a humiliating somersault.

"He's… right behind me, isn't he?" she muttered weakly.

"Hi, Mer."

Yes, he was…

"Hey… Derek," she cleared her throat, not daring to turn around to look at him.

"I guess I should say… thank you?" he quipped.

Nope, she couldn't count on him to pretend he didn't hear her enthusiastic praise of their sex life and his manhood.

"Uh, you're… welcome," she muttered.

"Mer? For you?" Izzie asked her as she reached the counter.

"Just a beer! I'll wait in our booth!" she yelled quickly bolting away from him without a glance.

THE GEEK AND THE REBEL

FLASHBACK

"Just relax," he murmured into her ear. He was spooning her from behind, their legs intertwined together, his hand wandering lazily up and down her curves.

It was about two hours after their last exam of the summer session and the occasion required a bit of private celebrating. The heat outside was staggering, the window open wide introducing more heat inside than cooling their bedroom. The air was still and heavy as they lay completely naked in the rumpled sheets, their breathing shallow, their skin hot and slick with sweat.

"Relax, Meri," he whispered again kissing the line of her jaw. "Didn't I do my job right?"

"You did…" she sighed contentedly. "I just need… time to unwind. You know how stressful it is. We need both to be at our best to get into the same internship program..."

"We will be," he assured her quietly. "You certainly don't have to worry about your grades. You kick everyone's ass, including mine."

She giggled nuzzling her face into the pillow but a twinge of unease shot through her.

"What if we… what if we don't make it together to Seattle Grace?" she voiced her concerns aloud. "We need to consider the possibilities…"

"We still have two years to worry about it," he sighed. "But… there's Mercy West, I guess…"

"It's a second rate hospital…" she remarked dejectedly.

"Doesn't matter if you're close," he shrugged.

She relaxed more into his embrace. "You're right. If it comes to worst, we can stay a few more years in the east… even though I will miss home…"

"Home is everywhere we are together," he assured her heatedly.

"You're so right today," she laughed freely and stretched languidly against his hard body. "Help me relax, Der…"

He smiled wickedly as he gently turned her onto her stomach, settling between her legs.

"As you wish," he whispered nibbling on her earlobe and delicately pushing the wild strands of her hair from her back.

She cradled the pillow into her arms happily as he hovered over her as if catching her in a trap between his outstretched arms. He planted a soft kiss onto the nape of her neck and repeated the reverent gesture on every vertebra down her spine. On his way back up he followed the trail with his tongue leaving a wet path that made her shiver despite the overwhelming heat. His fingertips played along her ribcage mischievously, teasing the sides of her breasts.

He lowered himself down on one elbow, his body covering hers. His lips worked wonders on her neck while his fingers tickled the nipple that peeked from underneath her. A new wave of dampness pooled at her opening, as his palm sensually followed the curve of her ass.

Her legs spread involuntarily as his fingers teased her folds coated both in the wetness of her current desire and the juices of the earlier lovemaking. He slowly dipped his finger inside her eliciting a delighted purr.

"God, you're amazing," he breathed out, brushing his finger against the swollen nub of her clit. He was always so proud he could lead her into a state of total abandon like this, that he could give her so much pleasure. And it was so damn arousing to see her writhe under his touch, giving herself to him with no holding back.

"I love you," he murmured into her neck as he added another finger to stimulate her hot core. She bucked her hips against his hand in approval, a load throaty moan escaping from deep within her. He hoped their neighbors had opted for an afternoon out. The indecent sounds of their lovemaking would surely carry though the open window, if not through the walls.

"Oh, Derek," she groaned, her head going back in bliss as her spine became taut against him. "Love you…"

He intended to add another finger and bring her to her well deserved orgasm but he just couldn't stop himself from taking her right now. She was so putty and responsive in his hands.

She groaned with protest when he took his hand out but was soon gratified as they were replaced with the hard length of his cock. Nothing mattered any more, no worries or qualms, as they were joined into one once again.

END OF FLASHBACK

THE GEEK AND THE REBEL

Cristina grabbed her glass and the one for Meredith but Izzie stopped her, placing her hand on her arm.

"Wait, wait a minute."

"What? Oh, no," Cristina groaned seeing Shepherd slide into their booth, across from Meredith. "Let's go before we witness some new drama."

"No, give them a few minutes," pleaded her Izzie. "I know what you think about him and I know that Meredith thinks he doesn't love her but I don't agree. I think they're both in love with each other. And I don't want to see that love go to waste. I'm giving ten bucks that Derek will get her back eventually."

Cristina raised one eyebrow at Izzie's challenging expression. "I'm giving… twenty that he'll get her wrapped around his finger before we're off on vacation."

"Cristina!" Izzie lunged at her with a wide smile.

"No, no hugs," she flinched back.

"Okay," Izzie shrugged happily. "But it's still nice to know you're warm and gooey inside."

"Shut up."

THE GEEK AND THE REBEL

"Mer," he quietly said her name sitting down in her booth.

"Derek." She wringed her fingers with obvious awkwardness, the humiliation of the last minutes hitting her double as she looked straight into his face. This week of sleeping alone was messing with her head. She wasn't used to sleeping alone.

"So, about-"

"I'm sorry about that comment," she fired interrupting whatever he intended to say. "Not that it wasn't true but I'm sorry. I should have never let Cristina provoke me… but she was annoying me with this you-need-to-get-laid talk and I…" she trailed off, suddenly realizing she said too much. She had never had to mark her words with Derek, they had no secrets from each to her. But that was in the past. That was a different reality. They were broken up now and they had to be careful what they said around each other so as not to make things more even more awkward or plainly not to hurt each other.

"Yeah, I stood there long enough to get that," he said lowly. His breath was strangled as he tried to brace himself for what he was about to say. And the words were burning his throat alive. There was one reason he came to Joe's tonight, Meredith. He wanted to watch her, feast his eyes on her. He didn't have so many occasions to do that recently. He only saw her at work and that was more and more busy as the end of their internship approached. He simply missed her. Simply? It was a gut wrenching feeling as though half of his being was ripped away. Everything he was and he did was incomplete without her.

So as he heard through the hospital grapevine that she would be at Joe's tonight, he didn't waste any second to arrive here. It was as pleasurable as it was a torture. All kinds of men came up to her table from time to time trying to chat her up, every time striking a knife into his heart. She turned them down one after another but… as his mind proposed fearfully, what if there came a time she'd accept? He had no right over her anymore. She was free to make her choices. But that realization only added to the overall pain.

"Meredith, I…" he began with a heavy heart. Wait… did he still have one? It should have been dead, shattered to pieces a while ago. "I know I don't have a right to ask you about anything… but I… I am. Just this one thing, please, favor me. I… it would kill me if I heard from some third party that you… that you…"

"That I what?" she frowned.

"That you're seeing someone," he choked out.

"I…" her voice faltered. "I'm just… I'm just out of a relationship. I don't have any intention to start dating. I'm concentrating on work anyway."

"Still," he almost begged her. "Please, promise me you're going to tell me first."

"Okay," she breathed out. "But… you shouldn't care…"

"But I do," he nodded.

A silence fell over them. Derek wasn't sure if he should stay or leave her alone.

"Der," her voice trembled. "You… tell me too, okay?"

"I'm not going to," he stated decidedly. "I'm not going to see anyone but you."

"You will-"

"No, I won't," he shook his head categorically. "You're the first and the last woman I will ever date. Whatever that means."

His eyes were scorching and she let herself by momentarily hypnotized. Until Cristina appeared back at the table.

"Shepherd, your ass on my seat."

He lowered his head and with a deep sigh heaved himself out.

"Goodnight, Mer." He went back to his table to take his earlier observation point.

"So," Cristina began, staring at her hands. "Just, I want to have something cleared up before I say this. I am not warm and gooey inside. I am a hardcore bitch."

"Okay?" frowned Meredith. Her head was already spinning with confessions of the day.

"I am sorry if I sounded harsh to you," she said unexpectedly. "I am sorry if I was insensitive."

"Cristina…"

"It's the way I deal," she shrugged. "If I let myself feel some stuff, I might explode… or I might just break down. I don't think I'm as strong as you. I would have been off the rails a long time ago if I were you. You're bigger than that. I'm not."

"Cris-"

"Just, that's all of a girl moment you'll get from me okay?"

"Okay," Meredith nodded softly. "But for your information, that was big. What you've just said. It was big."

"Whatever. Move your ass, Izzie's coming with the drinks."